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MyCuteLittleTwat

Brian, can you get some parmesan on the way home?

I totally forgot to buy it

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

Yeah, sure

What are we having for dinner?

MyCuteLittleTwat

I'm making spaghetti sauce with meatballs

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

Wow, that just made me pretty horny

But you do realize I like your sauce and meatballs the best, right?

So we might as well skip straight to dessert ๐Ÿ˜‹

MyCuteLittleTwat

Well, under different circumstances, I would totally agree with you

But let me guess... you forgot that Michael and Ben are coming over for dinner?

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

What the fuck?

Since when?

MyCuteLittleTwat

Since last week? ๐Ÿคจ

I told you about it!

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

No you fucking didn't!

Something as heterosexual as a double date, I would have certainly remembered and told you an immediate no

MyCuteLittleTwat

Well, admittedly, I had your dick in my mouth, so I may have mumbled a little ๐Ÿ™ƒ

But I did tell you!

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

Of course - distraction tactics

I wouldn't expect anything less from you

Sucking my dick while telling me something I would otherwise completely disagree with

That sounds so much like you!

MyCuteLittleTwat

Stop acting like it's the end of the world

It's just two couples having dinner together

No big deal

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

UGH ๐Ÿคฎ

You want me to barf?

Because I will

Right on my desk

MyCuteLittleTwat

Please don't, I don't want poor Cynthia to have to clean it up

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

Well, just cancel it then

Tell them we have the flu

MyCuteLittleTwat

Right, because that would be very believable

I just got off the phone with Michael, and believe me, he didn't hear me cough

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

Food poisoning, then

Tell them you put something expired in that sauce of yours and now you're shitting your pants

MyCuteLittleTwat

Let me get this straight

You want me to totally humiliate myself just because this is an inconvenience to you? ๐Ÿคจ

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

Well, yeah!

MyCuteLittleTwat

Yeah, that's not gonna happen, but nice try

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

Then I'm not coming home

Deal with it yourself

I'm just gonna go to Babylon and get a blowjob

One that isn't just an excuse to get something

MyCuteLittleTwat

Oh come on, that's not what it was

You know I love sucking you ๐Ÿคค

I just took advantage of your momentary weakness to tell you about it, because I knew it would be easier to convince you

But I enjoyed it very much

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

You mean you took advantage of my hardness?

MyCuteLittleTwat

Okay, now I can't stop laughing ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

I'm glad you're enjoying yourself

Cause I'm not

MyCuteLittleTwat

I really don't see what the problem is

They've been here like a million times

And we dine at their place all the time

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

Yeah, but it's never like this!

It's never a double date

MyCuteLittleTwat

Well, in my defense, I never said it was a double date-you did

It's just a group of friends enjoying a nice evening with a delicious meal ๐Ÿ˜‹

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

Don't fuck with me

I wasn't born yesterday

You really think I don't know what day it is?

MyCuteLittleTwat

Uh, I'm not sure what you mean

It's Friday

You got something against Friday? ๐Ÿคจ

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

Stop with the bullshit, Taylor

I know it's fucking Valentine's Day!

MyCuteLittleTwat

What?!

No way!

How could I have missed that?

I had absolutely no idea, Brian!

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

You're such a lying little asshole

MyCuteLittleTwat

But you love me anyway, right? ๐Ÿ˜˜

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

Barely

MyCuteLittleTwat

Ouch, that hurt

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

Oh, yeah?

Try having your boyfriend suck you off only to find out he did it to make you do something against your nature

MyCuteLittleTwat

Okay, now you're making me sound like a jerk

But maybe if you weren't so stubborn I wouldn't have to resort to such tactics

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

Of course, blame the victim

MyCuteLittleTwat

Stop making me laugh, I have to cook

They'll be here in an hour

So please hurry up with the parmesan

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

Wait, are you telling me I only have an hour to mentally prepare myself for this torture?

MyCuteLittleTwat

It's not torture, it's dinner with your boyfriend and your friends

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

Yeah, that sounds like something straight people do

You do realize we could have been fucking in the backroom covered in pink glitter and cum instead?

I even bought those chocolate-flavored condoms you mentioned

MyCuteLittleTwat

Wait, really? ๐Ÿ˜

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

Yep

I wanted to fuck you and then eat your ass, but you decided to ruin our night

MyCuteLittleTwat

Now you're making me feel really bad

I'll tell you what, if you behave yourself, we can stop by Babylon later and make your fantasies come true ๐Ÿ˜ˆ

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

And here we go again

From distraction tactics to blackmail

MyCuteLittleTwat

Oh my God, one day you're gonna make me check myself into a psych ward

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

Welcome to my world

MyCuteLittleTwat

It's just one dinner, Brian

You'll survive

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

Well, I hope we have wine

Lots of it

MyCuteLittleTwat

Of course

Now let me finish that sauce so we actually have something to eat

Or Michael and Ben will end up having to eat my ass, too

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

Over my dead body

That tasty ass is my property

MyCuteLittleTwat

Aw

Is this your way of saying you forgive me and that you won't shut the door in their faces?

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

Only if you promise not to wear underwear so I can see the shape of your dick better and imagine what I'll do with it when those two finally get out

Let's call it my distraction tactic

MyCuteLittleTwat

Deal ๐Ÿ˜‰

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend

Wonderful

--
Chapter End Notes:
I know it's not even close to February, but I completely forgot to post this, so let's just ignore that. I hope you enjoyed it.
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