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MyCuteLittleTwat:

Brian! I need you to come home

ASAP!!!

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend:

Why?? What's wrong?

Are you okay?

MyCuteLittleTwat:

No! I'm not! You have to help me

Like now!

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend:

Jesus

What the hell is going on?

Justin?

You're seriously scaring the shit out of me

Fucking answer me! I'm ten seconds away from calling 911!!

MyCuteLittleTwat:

Sorry! I was just fighting for my life

But it seems he's gone now

at least I hope so!

it was really terrifying

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend:

What the fuck are you talking about?

Who was there?

Are you alright?

MyCuteLittleTwat:

I think I twisted my ankle trying to run away

And it hurts really bad... but other than that I think I'm okay

It was one hell of an ugly motherfucker

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend:

Could you fucking tell me who the hell was there?

MyCuteLittleTwat:

FUCK!

He's back!

and he hid under our bed!

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend:

That's it

I'm calling the cops

MyCuteLittleTwat:

NO!

Wait

Don't do that

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend:

Then fucking answer me already!

My heart is beating out of my chest

MyCuteLittleTwat:

We have a huge spider in our bedroom

And when I say huge I mean HUGE!

And he just keeps attacking me

little fucker!

Brian? Are you still there??

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend:

Yeah

I'm googling how to get rid of a body quick and easy... because I'm going to fucking murder you!!!

MyCuteLittleTwat:

Hey!

I was in real danger here

I still am because that motherfucker is still under our bed

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend:

I hope he eats you alive

MyCuteLittleTwat:

That's not funny

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend:

I'm not joking

MyCuteLittleTwat

You're mean😥

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend:

And you are an asshole!

I almost called the cops because you scared the shit out of me

Because of some tiny eight-legged fucker

MyCuteLittleTwat:

He's not tiny!

And do you know what I read?

That they can crawl into your mouth at night

MOUTH!

Ewwww🤮

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend:

Keep talking and I shove it up your ass myself

MyCuteLittleTwat:

I hope you mean your dick because otherwise it wouldn't be very nice of you

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend:

No I don't mean my dick

For the first time I have no intention of fucking you

That's how much you drive me nuts

MyCuteLittleTwat:

😮😥

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend:

God I hate when you use these

Now let me get back to work

MyCuteLittleTwat:

BUT!

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend:

What now?

MyCuteLittleTwat:

I need you to come home and kill it

MyhotAsFuckBoyfriend:

Someone fucking pinch me already

Because this can't be happening

MyCuteLittleTwat:

You know how much I hate spiders!

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend:

I thought I knew... but this is too much

You're acting crazy

MyCuteLittleTwat:

So you're not going to help me?

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend:

I have more important things to do

So no

MyCuteLittleTwat:

More important than me??

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend:

No comment

MyCuteLittleTwat:

Fine!

I deal with it myself

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend:

See? You are a big boy

MyCuteLittleTwat:

I hope you'll be a big boy too when you come home horny tonight

Because I'm not going to help you with that

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend:

Seriously?

Justin?

Christ

I'll be home in thirty

With a knife and everything

MyCuteLittleTwat:

Thank you!!😘

I owe you a blowjob

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend:

Oh trust me you owe me more than that

MyCuteLittleTwat:

I'll get the dildo ready😉

MyHotAsFuckBoyfriend:

Be there in twenty!

MyCuteLittleTwat:

😍
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