"God, this city is even more amazing than the last time I was here," Emmett said, gazing dreamily out the taxi window.
"When were you in New York? In your dreams I suppose?" Debbie laughed at what she thought was impossible.
But I knew exactly when Emmett was here. How could I not know? That day went down in history as the best hotel room sex ever. But that day wasn't just about that... it was the day I realized that Justin came into my life for a reason. I just didn't know what that reason was yet. And we all know I didn't want to know for a really long time.
"You just hurt my feelings," Emmett gasped, clutching his chest to show how serious he was. "But just to remind you... me, Teddy, Mikey and Brian were here to rescue Justin years ago when he ran off with Brian's credit card."
"You left out one pretty crucial detail," I added. "He ran off to New York with my credit card because he was so careless he forgot to set the alarm and I got robbed."
"Well… yeah," Emmett chuckled.
"Damn, I almost forgot about that," Debbie said. "I was scared shitless... anything could happen to him."
"Something did happen to him... I fucked him... hard," I rolled my lips in, actually getting hard just from the thought. God, how I missed fucking him.
Emmett giggled and Debbie rolled her eyes, but I couldn't stop smiling. I followed him to New York with the idea of murdering him, but when I finally saw him in that white robe and messy hair, all I wanted to do was bury my cock in him. And this time was no different. Well, actually it was, because this time I was hoping he'd want to spend the rest of his life with me.
But I knew my chances were really slim. Maybe even zero. And it was kind of ironic. I urged him to go to New York and fulfill his dreams because I was afraid I would lose him otherwise. I was afraid that he would end up hating and despising me. So I pushed him. Actually, it was more like a gentle nudge. Because deep down he himself knew he had to go. Not just for himself, but for me too. Because no matter how much I told myself otherwise, I wasn't quite ready to throw myself into marriage and give up everything I knew and believed in. Yes, I wanted to marry him, but I just needed a little more time. And that's what I got. More than I wanted. And now all I had were rings that I didn't know if I would ever use.
And even though I knew it was our decision to break up, I still felt betrayed. Of course, neither of us wanted to have a relationship filled with only occasional visits and phone calls. We both needed more. It would kill us to hear each other on the phone but not be able to touch each other. So we decided it was better not to be in contact at all. But that didn't mean it was over. At least for me. And I naively thought it wasn't for Justin either. I still vividly remembered his words to me after our last time making love. His eyes were full of tears, his lips were trembling, but he said, "I'll be back. I promise." And I believed him.
And now he was getting married. And all I got from him was one drunken phone call. Actually, just a voicemail that he didn't even finish.
"Are you okay?" Debbie asked, giving my shoulder a nudge.
"What do you think?" I raised an eyebrow.
"That you look like you're going to throw up."
I laughed. "I love your honesty."
"It'll be okay, you'll see," she smiled and took my hand in hers. "I'm really proud of you."
"Why? I haven't done anything yet."
"You're here and that's all that matters. And if Justin hasn't gone completely insane yet, he should know that you being here even though he didn't invite you is a pretty fucking big sign that you still love him."
"Thanks, Mom," I smiled, resting my head against hers. "But I'm not sure my love will be enough this time."
"Then you will at least know you did everything you could," she assured me. "But first, I'm going to kick his ass. Because he can't just marry someone else... I bet it was just some one-night stand and a rash decision... so I'm gonna knock some sense into him."
I immediately started laughing and Debbie and Emmett joined me. I felt a little sorry for the driver, although he probably wanted to laugh too. But Debbie's words just made me feel so much better. Well, at least for a while... because the taxi soon pulled up... in front of a house much bigger than the building I lived in.
"And we were afraid we wouldn't have a place to sleep," Emmett said jokingly.
"What the hell... is he marrying a fucking millionaire?" Debbie added.
While the two of them were voicing their opinions, I just stared at the big-ass house in front of me... where Justin lived with his fiancé... and I immediately knew my best bet was to find a hole and climb right in. Because there was no way I was going into that house.
"Wow, who lives here? The president?" Michael said next to me.
I didn't even notice that the others had already arrived, that's how shocked I was. And it made it harder for me to just disappear.
"So... are we going in or are we just going to stand here?" Ted asked.
"I guess it depends on how quickly Brian can recover," Melanie said amused.
"Mel, come on," Lindsay said.
"I'm just saying... look at him... he's like a ghost."
"But I haven't lost my hearing yet," I snapped.
Suddenly everyone started looking at me, waiting to see what I would do. It almost seemed like they were ready to do whatever I was going to do. So the idea of finding a hole and crawling into it quickly went down the drain because we probably wouldn't all fit in there. But as much as I appreciated that they were supportive, I really didn't want that kind of pressure right now.
But I didn't have many options. I could either stand here like a complete idiot and throw away the chance of Justin and I ever being together again. Or I could find my remaining ball and do what I was here to do. No matter how scary it was.
"Okay, fine, let's go inside, I guess we don't have much choice anyway," I ordered.
They all waited for me to take the first step and followed me immediately. It would have been a pretty comical situation if my entire future wasn't at stake. So no, I didn't feel like laughing. And the closer I got to the house, the faster my heart was pounding. But I just couldn't wait to see him. His beautiful face, blue eyes, big lips, the taste of which I missed so much. And I knew it would be hard to resist pulling him into my arms and kissing him.
Anyway, there was no going back because my hand just did what was necessary - rang the bell. And soon the door began to open...