Spirit Pass Ranch

"Gussy, you aren't really going to go, are you?" Twelve year old Jessi asked as she flung her arms around her big brother's waist. He had just pulled the saddle off of his horse, Catori.

"Jess, you stopped calling me that five years ago. I think I'm a little old to be called that." He set the saddle down on a sawhorse and winked at her.

"You aren't that old. You're not eighteen yet. That is too young to leave home for a year." As she spoke she took a step back and put her hands on her hips.

Justin walked up to the barn but stopped at the stable door and took a step back so he didn't interrupt them, but he stayed close enough to hear them.

Gus smiled at her, what did Emma say? Oh ya, she said Jessi was a spitfire in all the best ways. "Jessi, you know I am going to be living with my mom while she is living in Ireland for a year." He led her to a bale of hay and they sat next to each other.

"Do you really know her? I mean, you haven't lived with her since you were a baby." Jessi continued to try to sway him.

"I know I haven't lived with her much, but she always kept in touch and visited at least once a year. Now she wants me to live with her to meet her new husband, and I will be close to Fiona. I know you don't remember when we spent time there but I loved it."

"The only good thing about that sentence was that it's your mom Lindsay and not the one who almost got you killed." She turned toward her brother and continued, "Well, seeing Fi will be good, too." Jessi dropped her head on Gus' shoulder and said, "But you won't be here. Who will help me with everything?" She threw her arms out in front of her and then dropped her hands in her lap in defeat.

Gus wrapped his arms around his little sister and kissed the top of her head, "Jess, Aaron will help you and you can always call me." 

"I guess Aaron can help me, too. He already helps me with my homework a lot. Since he did most of the same stuff last year, he remembers it better than you."

"And we both know, Aaron is smarter than me," Gus said, making Jessi laugh.

"He is a real brain."

Changing the subject he asked, "You're going to ride Catori for me, right? I know you may not have time every day, but if everyone takes her out on a different day, she will get enough exercise."

"Sure we will. I know Nova will ride him some days, but she helps Willow with their kids a lot."

"Of course she would, they are her cousins and with twin three year olds and now a new baby, they need all kinds of help."

"I like to help, too. Those two terrors are hard to keep up with." Jessi said, standing up.

Gus caught movement at the door and realized it was their dad. "Jess, why don't you go see if Willow needs help. I'll finish up here."

"Ok. Can you give Cookie an extra treat before you leave?"

‘Sure, I'll spoil them all." He bent down and kissed her cheek as she hugged him for a moment before turning around and ran out, not even noticing her dad.

Once she was out of earshot, Gus said, "You can come in, Dad. I saw you lurking." He stood as Justin walked in. In the last year he had passed Justin in height. He had Brian's height and look.

"She didn't convince you to stay, did she?" he asked as he put an arm around Gus' waist.  

"Dad, we've talked about all this."

"I know. I just know how much we'll all miss you. You were great with her, by the way."

"I'll miss you all, too, but I want to get to know Mom better and make sure Grant treats her well.  I only remember her with Mel." Soon after Gus had been kidnapped he had quit calling his other mom by anything other than her first name. "It seems a little odd that she is with a guy now but if they love each other, that is all that counts."

"And, admit it," Justin said, "you want to be near Fiona."

"Dad, she has a boyfriend. They are serious. He would never let her..." Gus stopped mid sentence.

"Do you know something that Kate and Quinn need to know about? Gus, you can't get involved with her love life if she is with someone, however, she is really young. She isn't serious, is she?"

"Just forget it and DON'T tell her parents. She'd kill me."

"Gus, as much as we don't want you to go, we understand it is a good time for you to do this.  Your mom will love having you there and your grandpa will be in Ireland for a couple of months."

"And you are coming for Christmas, right?"

"Yes, we will be there along with Kevin. My mom is going to be with Molly, but she may fly over for New Year's Eve."

"Dad, I really want to go, but when I think about it I get a little queasy."

"That's normal, Gus, and you know if you need us, one of us will be there as fast as we can fly there."

"I know that. I am more nervous about getting to know Mom again and meeting Grant."

"You'll do fine. You know how to take a step back if you need to and you'll be spending some of the time with Fi and the family at the house on the cliffs."

Justin hugged Gus who hugged him back. Gus smiled, "Thanks, Dad, I feel better." He took a breath and then said, "I love you."

"Damn, kid, I wasn't going to get choked up," Justin said as he blinked rapidly. "I love you more than you can imagine. Now, we better get in the house before dinner burns."

"That has happened a few times since she went part time," Gus said as he dropped his arm around Justin's shoulder and they moved toward the house.

Five days later Brian was driving Gus to the Denver airport. Gus had a late flight out that night.  He would switch planes in Atlanta and then fly on to Ireland. Both Brian and Gus were quiet the first half of the trip, only talking about Gus' flight times and boarding passes. After they got off the back roads and on the highway, Brian spoke.

"Gus, I know you will have a great time in Ireland and you'll learn a lot. You know so much more about the world than I did at your age." Then he added, "But if you want to come home or..."

"Dad, I know I am always welcome to come home and I know if I need one of you, you will fly out."

"Justin already told you that?"

"He did but he didn't have to. You two have always been there for me. And, I think Mom will be there if I need her, too, but I think I need a little more independence. It gets so easy to depend on both of you. I need to learn to do things for myself."

Brian reached over and squeezed Gus' hand, "I wouldn't let you go if I didn't think you could handle all of this."

"I know, Dad. Aaron and Jess might be the hardest to leave. I kind of feel responsible for them."

"You are a great big brother, but I think this will be really good for Aaron. He will step up and find out how capable he is."

"Ya, that kid is so smart, but sometimes it is so obvious he doubts his decisions without having someone reassure him. He talked to me the other night. He came into my room and just started rambling. He started asking question after question about how to do some day to day things that he really does know how to do."

"You know he feels more comfortable with animals than people sometimes. Remember when we got the ponies first and then the miniature cows. Now we have goats and miniature donkeys and miniature horses. It's hard for me to say no to him." Brian commented.

"Well, you don't say no to any of us very often, but is it harder with him because he looks so much like Dad?"

Brian glanced at him, "I always thought it was because of his quiet soul, but you may be right. I see a little of his mother in his nose but his eyes and smile are just like Justin's."

"Was it hard to decide to adopt him knowing who his real father was? After all that his father had put him through, Dad was willing to raise his father's child as his own."

"There was no discussion. Justin immediately said that Aaron was going to have a stable life and was going to know his true family. I wasn't sure it was the best idea because he had just recently finished therapy."

"Do you have any regrets?"

"No, Gus. I never regretted it. I think Aaron was good for both of us. Justin had loved you since the day you were born. You're my mini me... well, not so mini anymore. I bet by the time I see you next we will be the same height."

"Thanks for letting me do this. I know my moms were not good parents but I think now..."

"Gus, Justin and I talked about this happening someday. We are so glad it happened when you were this age and not a few years ago. We hope you still need us once in a while, but we trust you to make decisions that are right for you." Brian's voice was thick with emotion as he turned toward the airport terminal.

"Thanks, Dad," Gus said as Brian pulled into the line of cars at the departure lane. 

Both men got out of the vehicle and as they pulled suitcases out, a porter came and assisted them. He scanned Gus' pass and took the bags away, along with a generous tip from Brian. 

"That's safe, right, Dad? Most of what I own is in those bags. I was told I won't be able to find pants long enough for me over there."

"I'm sure. They are reliable and the tip I gave him won't hurt." Brian stopped talking and looked at his son. He had grown into such a handsome young man. He opened his arms and Gus stepped close. "Have fun, Gus. Spread your wings. Try new things. Maybe you'll meet a nice young man." He winked at him.

"Dad, you know I'm not opposed to men, if I met the right one, but..."

"You still wonder about Fiona?"

"I'm too young to think about any of that, except having fun and experiencing the world." Gus kissed Brian's cheek. "I'll let you know when I land in Atlanta and I know everything is on time."

Brian hugged him again, "I love you, Gus."

"I love you, too. And, Dad, go home and have sex with Daddy J. You'll both need it." With that Gus sprinted into the terminal. As a tear ran down Brian's face, he had to smile. Gus had finally come to appreciate the fact that his parents loved each other and still needed the other, body, mind, and soul.

Ireland

"Gus, we're over here!" Lindsay stood near the luggage carousel with a man standing to her right. Gus waved and strode over to her. He hugged her tightly and kissed her cheek before she could say, "You have gotten so tall. You have always looked like your gorgeous dad, but now you are as tall as he is."

"Not quite, but close." Gus turned to the man next to his mom, "I know we met on a skype call, but it is nice to meet you in person." He extended his hand and Grant opened his arms and stepped toward him and hugged him briefly.

"I'm glad you had a safe trip. Your mom has been on pins and needles all week." Grant put an arm around Lindsay's waist, "No wonder you wanted Brian as the father of your son." He kissed his wife and Gus finally saw what his mom saw in him. He was nothing like his dad or like anyone his mom had dated before, not that he had met many of the men she dated since she was in Europe at the time. Grant wasn't a bad looking guy, but he didn't have any outstanding features. His hair was thinning slightly and he was graying at the temples. He was a couple inches shorter than she was and carried a couple extra pounds around his midsection but their chemistry was so obvious. They loved each other.

After locating all his bags, Gus, with Grant's help, carried the bags to the limo that was waiting for them. Once they were settled Lindsay said, "We don't always ride around in something like this but our vehicles aren't big enough for everything we expected you to bring and this way we could catch up on the ride."

The conversation continued until Gus' phone rang. Lindsay saw his face light up and said, "Go ahead and let Fiona know you are almost there. Tell her to be at our place in an hour."

Gus mouthed the word, thanks, as he pressed the button on his phone. "Hey, Fi!"

"Gus, are you really here?"

"Ya, I'm with Grant and Mom."

"Are you at their house?"

"Not yet. Mom said to come over in an hour."

Lindsay said loudly enough for her to hear, "Tell your mom you're eating dinner with us."

"I am so excited! I'll be there."

"I can't wait to see you, Fi," Gus said softly.

"See you soon," Fiona said as she disconnected the phone.

"Mom, how far is Fiona's house from yours? I know you don't live in the same town, at least your address isn't the same."

Grant answered, "Our place is just out of the city limits in a different postal code but we are only about 10 minutes by car."

"So I should be able to bike there once I get one? Dads said I shouldn't buy a car."

Lindsay looked at her son and smiled, "If you want to get your license, it shouldn't be too hard and once you have it, you will be able to use one of our cars."

"Oh, that's great." The car slowed and the driver turned onto a private road that seemed to wind its way into the country. Gus continued, "Mom, I know you said you had room for me but..." he stopped as a large, historic home came into sight. "Wow, this place looks ancient and very cool at the same time."

"Well, it is over 300 years old, but about thirty years ago, my family had it fully restored, keeping the character but adding the modern luxuries."

"And Grant let me update a few things when I moved in." Lindsay leaned over and kissed his cheek as they stopped by the front door.

"Love, I don't ‘let' you do anything. All of this belongs to you as well as me." He ran a finger down Lindsay's cheek.

Gus realized he liked this man. He got only good vibes from this man. He could see how happy his mom was, which made him more relaxed about the year ahead. 

The door to the vehicle was opened and the driver offered his hand to Lindz, helping her out. Gus chose to get out the other door and by the time the three met by the door, the driver was getting the luggage out of the trunk which he brought to the door. By the time the driver drove away from the house the bags were in the front entry and Gus was taking in the grand old house.

Standing in the foyer,Gus looked up the grand staircase. He felt like he had stepped back 300 years. The rooms on either side of him were very traditional, with furniture that seemed to date back to the time the house was built. His mom saw his expression as he looked around him. "Let me show you where we spend most of our time. Just leave the bags there. We can carry them up in a little while." She led the way to the back of the house.  

The hall led to a door behind the stairs and as they passed through it, they moved back to the 21st century. He followed his mom into a bright, homey area which included a kitchen, dining area, and a family room with stuffed chairs and a large screen TV. One wall was mostly windows and, if he wasn't mistaken, he could see the ocean in the distance. 

"Mom, this view is great. Can you imagine how much Dad would love this?"

"It is beautiful. I would love to have Justin paint it for me. Since he did that exhibit for the museum, I bet he keeps busy. I probably couldn't afford him."

"He is super busy, but you know he would make time to do that for you. Maybe he will when they come for a visit." Gus heard a knock coming from somewhere to the side.

Lindsay pointed down a short hall, "That is probably Fi. Go answer the door before it starts raining and I will give you two a little space. Help yourself to anything in the fridge or pantry. Fi knows her way around." 

Gus noticed how heavy the sky was now and he walked to the door. He wondered why Fi would be spending time here, but the thought disappeared and Fiona stood directly in front of him. The only thing he could think was that she was stunning. It had been almost four years since they had seen each other in person and she had gone from a girl to a woman in that time.

"Holy shit, Gus, you are too tall for me to hug." Fi said. Gus put his arms around her and lifted her off the ground as her arms encircled his neck. As Fi leaned back to look at Gus for a minute he thought she was going to kiss him and in that split second as she started leaning back in, the sky opened up and Gus spun around with Fi still in his arms and he placed her just inside the door and followed her in.

Fi moved around the kitchen making tea and finding a package of cookies while Gus talked about the guy who sat next to him on his transatlantic flight. Gus couldn't take his eyes off of her. She was stunning. Her hair seemed to have more red in it than ever before and he was fairly sure it was natural. She had to be about 5'3" and she had curves in all the right places. When Fi sat across from him at a small cafe table and then said, "What are you staring at? Have I changed that much? Am I ugly or something?"

"Fi, you have changed but only in the best ways. You are ..."

"You don't have to lie, Gus. I know I have gotten fat. Rowen tells me every day."

"Rowen tells you that? I thought you said you two loved each other? Someone who loves you would never..." Gus stood knocking over his chair. "You are not fat. You have the best proportions ever. I have never seen a girl so..." Without thinking about it he took two steps and now at her side, he pulled Fiona to her feet and, wrapping his arms around her he pulled her close and lowered his lips to hers.

For a moment Fi leaned into him and absorbed his power but then she pushed away from him.  "Gus, I can't! If Rowen ever thought..."

Gus saw a flicker of fear cross her face. "I'm sorry, Fi. I shouldn't have done that. He shouldn't make you feel that way, but haven't really slept in over 24 hours. I know better than to do something like that without your permission."

"Awe, Gus. I overreacted. Rowen can be a little possessive, but that is just because I flirt a little too much. I probably was sending off signals. He says I do that." The magical moment of their reunion was gone. "I better go. I am sure you are tired from your trip." Fi reached up and patted Gus' cheek. I will see you soon. I will set up a time for you to meet Rowen. Oh, and my friend, Shea, would be perfect for you. Her boyfriend went off to Uni and they decided they would still be friends but they were better friends now." Fi had been moving to the door as she talked.

"Fiona, I thought you were staying for dinner," Lindsay commented as she walked into the kitchen and saw her at the door.

‘Oh, I'm sorry. I already had something planned and Gus is really tired." She opened the door and turned to Gus, "I'll message you, Gus. We can set up a double date this weekend." And with that Fi was gone.

Lindsay put her arm around Gus' waist, "Did something happen?"

"No, not really. I think I am just a little punchy since I'm tired." He followed Lindsay to the counter and sat on one of the stools near his mother. "Mom, have you ever met this Rowen guy?"

"I have met him but that's about it. You knew she was dating, right?"

"Sure, I did. We don't have any claims on each other, but I get a weird feeling about him.  I know he puts her down. There were a couple times we talked and I got the feeling he may bully her more than that."

"So you think he hits her?"

"I don't know. I'm too tired to think. I'm probably just blowing it out of proportion." He took a deep breath, "I meant to ask, how does Fi know her way around here?"

"We have had Kate help with a couple parties for Grant's work. Fi comes along to help serve. Somehow she has decided that this is the place to come when she's had a fight with her mom.  It hasn't happened often but a couple times she stayed overnight with Kate's permission."

"What did they fight about?"

Lindsay threw some pasta in boiling water, "Now that you mention it, I think it was because of Rowen. I just figured it is just normal growing pains."

Gus yawned and said "It probably is." Laying his head on the counter, he asked, "Is the food going to be ready soon? I'm fading fast."

"Why don't you go upstairs and let Grant know we will eat in about 10 minutes."

"Oh, ya, I better bring my bags up."

"Grant already put them in your room. You are located at the far end of the hall. Your bags will be there. You should see Grant about half the way down. The French doors should be open."

"Thanks, Mom. Oh, and so far, I really like him."

Lindsay moved to him and kissed his cheek, "I'm glad, Gus, because I really love him."

"And he loves you and so do I." Gus kissed her cheek back and headed for the stairs.

Gus found his room and opened his first suitcase. He opened the drawers to a dresser and began to put away his clothes. As he closed the now empty bag he heard footsteps behind him. 

"Finding everything alright?" Grant asked from the door.

"I'm too tired to know anything. Oh, fuck..." Gus looked at Grant to see if he looked irritated by his language but he saw no reaction. "Sorry, I really don't usually swear that much. I'm just so tired. I'm so tired I forgot to tell you dinner will be ready ..." he looked at his watch, "Dinner is ready now. Actually five minutes ago."

"Well, I have never known your mother to have something ready on time so I am guessing we will be right on time." Grant put his hand on Gus' shoulder. "Let's eat and then you can sleep as long as you want."

After eating dinner, Gus excused himself and went up to his room. He got in the shower and after standing under a hot stream for several minutes. Gus stepped out and dried off. He pulled on some shorts and a t-shirt. As he pulled the blanket back there was a soft knock on the door.  

"Gus, can I come in?" Lindsay's voice came through the door.

"Sure, Mom." 

Lindz walked in with a bottle of water and a plate with some snacks on it, "I thought you might need this." She held up the water. "And you never know when you could use a snack when you are dealing with jet lag."

"Thanks," he said and yawned as he dropped on the bed. "I know we have a lot of things to catch up on but I don't think I can talk much more tonight."

"I don't expect you to." She pulled a second bottle out of her pocket and set it next to the first. "Of course you can go get anything you want out of the kitchen." She sat next to her son and he wrapped his long arms around her.  

"Mom, all I need is sleep, although it seems weird going to bed at 6:00 p.m. Oh, well. Love you."

"Ah, Gus, I love you, too. Sleep as long as you want. I will see you tomorrow."

"Night. Thanks for the water."

Lindsay turned off the light and closed the door. Within minutes Gus was sound asleep.

Gus woke up around 2:00 and drank a bottle of water. He hadn't noticed before, but his mom had put some aspirin on the plate as well. It wasn't really aspirin but he remembered it from one of their trips here. All he knew was he had a headache and this should help. Using the second bottle of water he took the pills and then finished that bottle, too. As he laid there, Fiona came back to his mind. She was always pretty but now she was stunning. He would always love her and she loved him. When they were kids they talked about getting married when they grew up, like when they were twenty. Gus got out of bed. He couldn't think about his beautiful friend when she wasn't even free. She was seeing Rowen right now.

After using the bathroom he realized he might want more water, he walked quietly down the hall and then moved down the stairs and went to the kitchen. He wasn't sure if he was hungry but as he grabbed a couple more bottles out of the fridge he saw some pizza and took that out, too.  He took a bite and then put the pieces in the microwave and warmed them for a couple seconds. He grabbed a sweater off a hook by the back door and, along with the pizza, he left the house through the French door. He just needed a little fresh air. It was cool outside and he took a deep breath, taking in the scents that were so familiar. The Ireland countryside had a smell all its own.

After finishing off the pizza he set the container down on a table and moved further out in the yard to get a better view. He stared at the sky. He was half a world away from home but the stars were as beautiful here as they were in the mountains. His mind wandered back to Fi, his Fi. Could he call her that? Somewhere deep in his being he felt something stir. He wasn't sure why but he knew he had come here for a reason. Fi needed him, and he wouldn't be going anywhere until he knew she was safe.