Chapter 5
Julian Remmington paced on the porch, in front of the duplex. He expected Aaron to get home by late afternoon, but as it approached 10:00 pm, he still hadn’t arrived. He had tried to call and text him but it was one of the days with no reception. He had managed to get in touch with the agency and found out that Aaron had picked up the supplies at the time expected and said he was heading back home from there. He was now five hours later than he should be. He felt so helpless. If anything happened to him…
Julian strained to see in the direction Aaron was coming from, willing himself to see lights. When his eyes were tired from the strain he closed his eyes, and though he wasn’t a religious person, he prayed to whatever higher beings there were. As he leaned against the railing, eyes closed, he thought he was hearing a swarm of insects but as it got louder he realized it was an engine. His eyes popped open and, to his relief, he saw headlights. He left the porch and started a slow jog toward the clinic but as the vehicle drew near he soon was sprinting to get to the building at the same time.
“Hey, Remmie, I didn’t expect you to meet me here. I thought you would be about ready for bed.”
Remmie started at his feet and looked slowly up Aaron’s body and when he locked his eyes on Aaron’s he threw his arms around his neck, and sobbed. Aaron was a little confused as to what was going on but he put his arms around his friend and held him close.
When Remmie started pulling himself together, Aaron leaned back a bit, and asked, “Julian, did something happen? What is it?” He brushed away Remmie’s tears.
“Where the HELL have you been?” Julian was angry now.
Aaron smiled softly and kissed his cheek, “You didn’t get my texts. I’m fine Julian. Open the garage door and let me put the rover away. Then I’ll tell you all about my day while I find something to eat.”
Julian wasn’t ready to let go of the physical contact with Aaron. Without thinking twice, he pulled him close again and kissed him. It wasn’t a friendly kiss. For a moment, both men were lost in the heat of the moment as a fire was ignited in both of them but Aaron soon realized what he was doing and stepped back.
“Oh shit, Aaron, I’m sorry. I didn’t…”
“Open the garage. I am starving.”
They had each grabbed one of Aaron’s bags and walked back to the duplex in silence until they got to their respective homes. “I have dinner ready.”
Aaron took his bag from Remmie and said, “Can you give me time for a quick shower? I promise it will only be ten minutes and then I’ll tell you about my day.”
“Sure. I need to reheat the food anyway.”
Aaron was true to his word and was back at Remmie’s ten minutes later. “Feel better?” Remmie asked.
“Ya, I do. This smells great!” He said as he looked at the food on the table. As they sat down, they both could feel some tension between them. “Remmie, I’m sorry you were so worried. I thought it was odd that I hadn't heard back from you.” He started to reach out to touch his arm, but he stopped himself.
Remmie noticed Aaron’s retraction and said, “I’m sorry I ambushed you out there. I shouldn’t have. Now tell me about your day and why you took ten years off my life.”
“It started after I picked up our supplies. I was about half an hour out of the city when I got a flat tire. I changed it but since I was still so close to the city, I thought I should get the tire repaired. Of course that took a couple hours. Then I had barely got past the point of the flat and, just off the road I saw a flock of sheep and one of them was laying down. I stopped and investigated. The animal had been attacked by something. I couldn’t save him. I waved down a local who brought the owner over. I put the poor animal out of his misery and then fixed up a couple with minor injuries.” Aaron stopped talking to eat some of his dinner and drink some wine.
“Wow, you really did have a day,” Julian commented, starting to relax from all the tension of the last few hours.
Aaron swallowed the food that was in his mouth. “Oh, it wasn’t over yet. I got back on the road, and by now the sun was getting low. I expected to be home about 8:00 but then I drove about half an hour, and now it was nearly dark. I came around a curve and nearly ran into a herd of cattle.”
“Let me guess, you got out to help get them off the road?” By now Remmie had finished eating and leaned back in his chair, refilled his wine glass, and waited for Aaron to continue.
“It wasn’t like I could get around them.” He finished the food on his plate and held up his glass for Julian to fill it. “Can we move to the sofa?”
They sat next to each other. There was a little space between them but not more than a few inches. “Now tell me about the weekend with Jess.”
“We had a great time. You know she has a crush on you but, as you are well aware, there is no settling her down. Someday she will make someone a great partner.” Aaron dropped his head on Julian’s shoulder.
“You’re right there.” He hesitated but then continued, “She is a beautiful person, inside and out, but I am not interested. I have my eye on someone of my own.” He took Aaron’s hand. “Jessi told me I needed to be direct.”
“Oh, she was direct with me, too.” Aaron shifted a bit uncomfortably. “It isn’t you, Julian. I just don’t know if I can give you what I want.”
“Aaron, I promise I won’t push you. You are in charge of what happens but I want you to know,” he leaned closer and kissed him. It was gentle and probing and then he pulled away as he put an arm around him, “I am going to keep reminding you I think we belong together.”
“Ok, ok. Anyone who worries as much about me as you do, deserves …” Aaron stood but stopped, turned to Julian, and kissed him. “And now I need to get some sleep.”
Julian watched him walk out, moved to the door, and locked it before turning off the lights and doing a dance all the way to the bedroom.
The everyday routine for Aaron and Julian remained the same but in the evening, when they were home the relationship had changed. Julian didn’t shy away from giving Aaron a glancing touch or a kiss on the top of his head. The conversations became more intimate and there was one evening when as they sat on the sofa things went much further than before and as Julian slowly unzipped Aaron’s fly, Aaron panicked. He moved off the sofa and said, “Julian, no, I’m so sorry. I really care about you and I know you feel the same but...”
“No, Aaron. I am totally in love with you.” He stood and moved to Aaron’s side. “I have never felt this way about another human and I will wait as long as it takes.” Julian put a hand on both cheeks and barely touched his mouth with his lips. “If you loved Teddy as much as I love you, Ican understand how you feel.” With that said he turned and walked out the door.
Aaron stood in the middle of his living room for several moments. He wasn’t sure why he had stopped Julian. Was he scared of the physical contact since it had been so long and, face it, Teddy was the only person he had ever been with or was he worried about his heart?
Julian arrived in the morning with Aaron’s cup of coffee. “What do you have on your schedule today?” he asked Aaron as he handed him the mug.
“I’m actually planning on being in the office most of the day.”
“That’s great. I need to go out to that little settlement in the northwest corner of our area. I can never remember how to pronounce it. You will have to handle the humans that walk in today. You know the drill.”
“I do. I will check any bumps or bruises. I can do stitches if needed. You are better at those than I am. I guess I don’t worry about the sutures on a cow but a human…”
“Aaron, you do fine and you know the people around here are not vain when it comes to that.”
“Are you sure you don’t want me to go along with you? I don’t like that area. You came with me when I had to go there.”
“They would have been upset if their prize goat died. I am just giving the kids shots. I don’t see any records of them ever getting the basic shots and this is the time of year when many of them get cuts so I want them to at least have the tetanus shot. I think I have enough of the vaccine to give them the MMR as well.”
“When are you planning to get back?”
“I am hoping to be home between 3:00 and 4:00 but it could be after 5:00. It depends on the roads up there. They tend to wash out and they have had heavy rain.” He took Aaron’s empty hand and brought it to his lips, kissing it before dropping it again. “I like that you worry about me.” Both men had decided, for their own safety, they would not show physical affection in public. Being gay was still frowned on in many parts of Africa and even illegal in many cases.
Aaron smirked and said, “I don’t want to have to deliver any more babies for you.”
“Such concern.” Remmie acted offended but then smiled. “I need to get going.”
“I’ll have dinner ready for you when you get home.” Aaron said as Remmie began to move away. Aaron took his hand to stop him. Looking directly into his handsome face, he said, “Be careful and let me know when you’re on your way home if you have service. I do worry.”
Both men felt drawn to each other but, instead, Remmie put his hand to his own mouth then touched Aaron’s lips before turning and moving away at a jog.
Aaron kept busy in the clinic. He took care of both animal patients and put a couple stitches in a young man’s leg as well as processed some lab work from a couple animals he had seen the day before. As he sat down for a bite to eat around 1:00 p.m. he saw a message from Julian. It had been sent around 11:00, letting Aaron know that he had arrived safely. Aaron saw a couple more patients and finished his lab tests before closing up for the day. He looked at his phone hoping Julian had left a message or texted. He realized he just wanted to hear Remmie’s voice. Aaron really missed him.
As he walked home he remembered having that same feeling about Teddy. Just hearing his voice had always made him feel like everything in the world was alright. Maybe it was time he admitted to himself that no one could replace Teddy but he felt ready to allow Remmie into his life for what was ahead.
Aaron arrived at the duplex and started preparing dinner. Every few minutes he glanced at his phone to see if he had missed an incoming message. He also sent one out hoping Remmie would respond but the phone remained silent.
When it was 5:00 and he still hadn’t heard anything, Aaron walked down to the mayor’s house and asked if he had heard anything. He knew if anything was going on in the region, the mayor would know.
The older man had heard nothing about the doctor but he did know that there was a storm heading this way and it would have hit the area Remmie was working in some time ago. “The doctor is wise. He would know to stay where he was.”
“Is there a way to get in touch with the settlement out there and check on him?” Aaron knew most of the villages had a central phone located at one of the elder’s homes.
“We can try,” the mayor’s wife said as she walked into the room.
It took fifteen minutes to get a call through and when someone picked up, the line was cutting in and out so badly they could barely track the conversation. Aaron heard the words storm and bad.
“Doctor Remmington? Is he there?” Aaron asked for a third time.
Just before the line went totally dead the voice on the other end said, “Dr…..left….orm.”
“Do you think he meant that Remmie left before the storm? After the storm?” Aaron asked the mayor and his wife.
The mayor said he would go check with a couple other men in the village to see if any of them had been out that direction. The storm was now rolling into town so many of the men had just gotten back.
The mayor’s wife walked over to Aaron and placed a hand on his shoulder. “You do not let your true feelings show but I see. I know you love the doctor. You love him like I love the mayor. It makes no difference to me who you love but you are wise to keep your secret.”
Aaron was surprised by her words. “Thank you. He is a very special man and a great doctor.”
“And you need to go look for him?” she asked in a cross between a question and a statement.
Aaron couldn’t find words but he nodded.
The mayor returned with news that there were a couple breaches of the road along the way to the northwest region. “Dr. Aaron, you just go sleep. In the morning, the sun will be up and we will find the doctor. He will just be along the road waiting.”
“Give him the keys to your truck,” the mayor’s wife told her husband.
“Woman, didn’t you hear what I just said? Don’t you hear that rain?”
“Aaron is not going to wait until the morning. Give him your keys or go out with him.”
This time the mayor looked at Aaron with a concerned look on his face. “I will go with you if you want but if you know the way…” he extended his keys to Aaron.
“I know the way. I was up there last week. Thank you, sir.” He said this as he reached for the keys. He hadn’t noticed the woman had walked out of the room. She returned with a bag.
“Take this. There is some food, water, and blankets. In case you need to stay the night out there.”
Aaron thanked them both and was soon on the road moving north.
The rain was pelting the windshield far faster than the wipers could keep it cleared. Travel was slow on the messy roads and at times there were strong gusts of wind that made the vehicle rock. Aaron kept softly praying to whatever higher being was listening. He also kept trying to feel Julian’s presence. He could always feel Teddy, and the moment he passed, Aaron felt his spirit depart. Julian had to be alive.
When he wasn’t reaching out in prayer, he spoke to himself, trying to convince himself that Julian was just hunkered down or stuck somewhere, waiting for the weather to clear and the weather was calming down. Now that the rain was stopping, Aaron’s phone started to pick up a signal. It was still spotty but when he heard the ping of a message coming in, he pulled over and picked up the phone.
Aaron had a voice message from Julian. He immediately played the message. He noticed the message had been sent more than four hours ago. The message cut in and out just like the earlier phone call he had at the mayor’s house. Julian’s voice filled the darkness of the vehicle. “Aaron…accident…road wash…sorry…” and the message ended.
Aaron played it a couple times. Remmie had been in an accident. Oh, shit! How bad was the accident? Was he injured? Where was Remmie? The message had been left three hours ago. Why hadn’t Remmie called again. Oh, god, he was dead!
“Aaron, stop freaking out. This isn’t going to help your Julian.” Aaron heard Teddy’s voice so clearly he spun around in his seat to look behind himself. He was alone. As he turned back to face the windshield, the voice continued inside his head. “Aary, I know you loved me. You are the best boy and now a man I ever met. You deserve a man like him. Julian makes you happy. Now go find him.”
Aaron responded out loud, “Oh, Teddy, I will never forget you. Do you know where he is? Please tell me he is alive.” He put the car in gear and began to move forward. And one more time Teddy spoke to him again.
Aaron could feel his presence. “Follow your heart. I know you will always keep me there. I’ll guide you.”
“You will always have a home there,” Aaron said as he moved forward on auto pilot.
The road continued to be dangerous. As he moved slowly down the muddy path, time seemed to stop and yet Aaron knew how long ago Julian had called about having an accident. When Aaron got to a fork in the road, instinctively he turned down the less developed road. He wasn't sure why but he wasn’t going to question Teddy.
No more messages came through but, Aaron’s phone from time to time would vibrate or ping as if a message had come but there was no message. When his phone started to beep constantly, Aaron stopped and looked around. He hadn’t noticed the tire tracks that led away from the road and he knew this is where he had to go.
Slowly, Aaron moved down the path. “Shit I can’t see a thing.” He got out of the ranger grabbing an old cloth that was laying in the back. He moved to the grill and, as he had expected, the lights were caked in mud. He did his best to wipe them off and then turned to see what the beams revealed.
To his surprise, ten feet ahead of where he stood, the path dropped out of view. As he walked a few feet ahead he realized the road didn’t just dip down but instead there was a ten foot drop. He could not see anything down there so he got back in the truck and crept a little closer to the edge. As he opened the door he noticed a lantern behind his seat so he grabbed it and walked toward the ridge. This time, with the help of the headlights and the lantern he saw the beam reflect back.
“Remmie! Are you down there?” He was already carefully finding the safest path downward. He listened, hoping a voice would reach his ears but instead of words there was a short beep of the horn. Aaron wanted to run but the ground under his feet started slipping so he slowed down knowing he couldn’t help if he was injured. “I’m coming, Julian. Hold on.”
When he got on more solid ground, he was close enough to see their Range Rover and the heap of metal it now was. He ran the last few yards and, using his lantern to see, he looked into the interior of the wreck. He wasn’t sure if he was more relieved or scared when he didn’t see Remmie inside. “Julian, where are you?” he called.
Trying to be completely silent, he listened. From somewhere on the other side of the twisted wreckage, he heard a soft tap, tap, tap. He rushed around the side and slid in the mud before finding himself face to face with Julian Remmington.
Julian’s lips were moving but no sound was coming out. “I can’t hear you, Julian.” Aaron moved closer. “Where are you hurt? I need to assess you.”
With Aaron’s ear right by Julian’s mouth he could hear what Julian was saying. “Hit my throat on the steering wheel. Bruised. Concussion. Shoulder broke.” A shiver ran through him.
“You’re in shock.” Aaron looked at Remmie’s legs. “Are your legs Ok? Can you walk? No, that isn’t going to work.” He looked up at the headlights. “I’ll be right back. I have supplies in the truck.”
With his good arm he reached out and grabbed Aaron’s hand. He pulled him close again. “I knew you would come for me.”
Aaron leaned over and kissed him. “You scared the hell out of me.” He kissed him again and then moved to get supplies.
Twenty minutes later, Aaron had pulled the back seat out of the Range Rover and now had Remmie sitting on it with a blanket wrapped around him and a flask of water in his hand. Aaron was cleaning and bandaging his scrapes. Once he had taken care of that, with Julian’s direction, he immobilized the injured arm and shoulder. “Is that alright? Is it tight enough? Is it too tight?”
Julian didn’t try to talk but he nodded slightly and sipped on the water. Aaron sat down next to him with the bit of food the mayor’s wife had given him. “Are you hungry?” he pulled out a banana and after pulling the peel down he brought it to Julian’s lips and Julian took a bite. “You have to be hungry.”
Julian nodded and took another bite but then he gagged and the food came up again. He whispered, “Nauseous. Concussion.”
Aaron had contacted the agency they worked for earlier. They would be sending a helicopter as soon as they could. “Someone will be out here as soon as the sun is up.” Aaron wrapped his arms around Julian along with another blanket and Julian leaned against him. Aaron couldn’t stop himself from kissing his head every few minutes as Julian began to drift off. “Julian, you need to stay awake. You took a hard hit.”
“Aaron, I love you.”
“I love you, too, Julian. I was so scared today. I’m sorry I couldn’t say it earlier.”
“Maybe I should have nearly died weeks ago.”
“Don’t say that. I don’t know what I would have done if you had died.”
“Oh, Aaron, I shouldn’t have said that. My brain isn’t….please forgive me. I wasn’t trying to bring Teddy up.”
“Oh, Julian, I know that.”
“Tell me you love me again,” Julian said.
“Julian Remmington, I love you. And when you’re feeling better I have a story to tell you about Teddy. Now, shut up and close your eyes. If you doze now, it shouldn't hurt. The copter should be here within the hour.”
An hour later, Aaron and Julian were in the air. He had spoken to the mayor and he was assured someone would come and pick up the mayor’s vehicle. It wouldn’t have mattered. There was no way Aaron was leaving Julian’s side. Although Julian was not continuous, Aaron wouldn’t let go of his hand and when they landed, Aaron was the one passing on Julian’s condition to the doctor who met them but when Julian went back for tests Aaron was sent to the waiting room.
Aaron found a sofa in a quiet corner. His exhaustion caught up with him, and he slept.