BEAUTY AND THE BEAST

Chapter 13

Departure and Inner Demons

The morning after:

   Justin awoke at about 10:00 AM to the smell of fried bacon and fresh coffee. But he was unable to partake of them for a few reasons.

   The first one was that he couldn't move. He was currently...ensconced wasn't even the right word for it...more like cocooned in Brian's burly clutches. He was spooned up against Brian's massive chest with his huge arms wrapped possessively around him. Ditto his legs around his legs. He struggled and was only able to manage small squirming movement. Yup, it looked like he wasn't going anywhere for a while.

   The other reason was that he really didn't want to get up yet. His body felt so loose and limp and thoroughly fucked through that he was like fleshy pudding. His body was heavy and sated and he didn't ever really want to move from where he was right now. Right now, where he was, he was home.

   Brian had been insatiable. Including the first quickie and then the long, languorous second time when Brian had transformed into a unique werewolf creature, they had made love for a total of 6 times. And that second time when Brian's hair had thickened, his fangs grew so big they overlapped each other; when his voice had been reduced to the Wolfman's and his nails had lengthened and sharpened to claws, that time had been the best. Brian had acquired sexual super powers and had fucked him so hard and fast that Brian had been a blur. After their mutual climaxes, he had transformed back but his appetite had not been satisfied. He had fucked and made love to him a total of 4 more times until Justin had hollered Uncle and begged for sleep three hours ago. And now it was morning.

   Of course the thing that happens when you are just waking up and perfectly comfortable to roll over and go back to sleep, happened. He needed to go to the bathroom.

   Justin struggled mightily but it was no use. H was able to make a few weak squirms but that was it. He wasn't going anywhere.

   "Brian! Brian, let me go! I'll be right back!" Brian didn't wake.

   Justin poked and pinched a few strategic locations and that seemed to do the trick. Groaning, Brian rolled over on his back and went back to sleep, snoring gently.

   Justin hopped out of bed and hustled to the bathroom as fast as a bottom boy with a sore ass could hustle. He did his business and then came back into the main room on the hunt for those delightful breakfast smells.

   The Wards had conjured up eggs, bacon and hashbrowns and a selection of fruits in the breakfast nook. And coffee! Oh, thank all the gods and Spongebob, they had included coffee.

   Justin poured two steaming cup and dolloped up two plates filled with food. He went over to the bed and wished. He waved a plate under Brian's nose and the older Alpha began to crankily wake up.

   "I swear, Sunshine, if that bacon didn't smell so good, you'd be in big trouble for waking me up!" he complained.

   "Oh stop your grousing! The fact is, it does smell great and probably tastes even better! And I wished these up for us." Justin put the food on the two TV trays and slid them into place, so they could eat in bed.

   "Ahhh, Sunshine! What would I do without you?"

   "Pine away and be desperately lonely?" Justin asked hopefully.

   "Twat." Brian gave him a groggy, sloppy kiss.

   As they ate, Brian warned him that despite this, it was not going to be enough to really wake him and to let him sleep. He had done an awful lot of working out and run 40 miles the day before after all.

   "You sleep as much as you need. I'll entertain myself." Justin told him. Brian nodded, and shovelled in a few more bites before feeling the heaviness of sleep overcome him again. Justin removed the tray and whispered consolingly, "Sleep now, my love. And let this be a consolation. At least you'll never have to worry about carbs again."

   Brian yawned hugely. "You never know. You should always watch out for carbs!" And with another sloppy kiss, he fell back among the pillows and fell deeply asleep.

   After that, Justin pottered around and cleaned up a bit, ate a bit more and looked upon Brian sleeping peacefully on his back, sheets just low enough to expose his dick, which, although soft, was still huge and curved attractively over his thigh.

   An overwhelming desire overcame Justin. No, not THAT kind of desire! Will you please get your minds out of the gutter!? Honestly!

   He moved his easel a little closer to the center of the apartment and began to paint his lover.

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   Brian slept most of the day and finally woke up at about 3:00 PM.

   "My goodness! Welcome back!" Justin said good-naturedly.

   "Thanks. And what did you do today?"

   "Come and see," invited Justin.

   And so, Brian went over to the easel and looked at the painting Justin had done of him as he slept with his bare chest on magnificent display and his cock curved generously over his thigh.

   Brian was thunderstruck. Justin had drawn him without a mask and while it was a little off, it looked amazingly like him...uhh....well...how he used to look like.

   "I know it's probably not perfect...I took a look at your bone structure and the shape of your cheeks and your nose and eliminated the mask and came up with this. I know it's not exactly..." Justin started to ramble, getting nervous as Brian drank in himself in silence and was giving no feedback.

   Brian pulled him toward him and spun him around. "It's perfect. True, it's not exactly how I looked but it's pretty darn close. And I love it. I wouldn't change a thing!"

   "Really, Brian?"

   "Yes. Absolutely. I love it. I love y..."

   Brian cut off and stiffened before he could complete the lesbianic thought. Where the hell had that come from? Brian Kinney didn't love! Brian Kinney fucked!

   "Love what, Brian?" asked Justin leaning back into his huge chest and wiggling his pert butt against his crotch.

   "I, uhhhh....love what you did to my eyes," lied Brian. "And I'm loving what you're doing right now. Give me a few minutes to scrape off the funk and I'll show you exactly what I mean."

   "Mmmmmm! Sounds like a plan! Oh, I know! Let's take a shower together."

   "Not this time, Sunshine, I need to really let everything hang out and uncover. So that means I need to be in there alone. You must promise to leave me alone and not peek in the door at all. Promise me!"

   "All right! All right! I promise! I promise!" he repeated in a mock super serious way.

   "That's my boy," Brian said. He kissed him and went to take a shower.

   Justin puttered around a bit, casting worried looks at the closed door every so often. Never fear! He had no desire to see what was behind that door! And he was not fooled, although he would continue to pretend to be. He knew Brian was going to tell him something else, something important. Probably that he loved him. But he wasn't going to force him. Brian had to discover what Justin already knew, and overcome the barrier to expressing his true feelings on his own.

   Awhile later, Brian came out of the bathroom with his skullcap and mask intact but otherwise gloriously naked. He found Justin sitting on the edge of the bed looking sad and pensive and so very, very small.

   "What's the matter, Sunshine?"

   Justin looked up and shook off his melancholy thoughts. "Oh, nothing really. I was just missing you."

   "Well..." Brian took two steps and bent over him and leaned him back onto the bed. "We can't have that now, can we?"

   And he captured Justin's mouth in a hot and hungry kiss that curled Justin's toes and never really ended for the next two hours.

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   After that, things were a bit more relaxed and comfortable.

   They settled into a kind of routine, a rather scheduled existence. They would wake up, make love and then have breakfast. They'd have a shower and a quick fuck whereupon Justin would leave the shower first and let Brian have his quiet time. Then Justin would either leave or shoo Brian out of his apartments and paint for most of the morning and some of the afternoon. They would usually but not always have lunch alone. Brian would work out and have his session with an online psychiatrist they found, via Skype.

   In the afternoon, Justin would paint some more or go exploring. However, he never went into the west wing again and he NEVER again forgot his cell.

   At seven sharp, Brian would knock on Justin's door. He was so punctual, Justin could set his watch by him and he never forgot or refused to come ever again.

   They would have dinner and Brian would bring him a small gift. Then they would just sit and talk or make out and suddenly Justin would be swept into Brian's arms and he would be carried off magnificently either to his bed or to Brian's depending on how long Brian felt he could hang on for. The weird thing about that was, that no matter how many times Brian carried him off, later, when Justin tried to find his way back, he would always get lost again and end up in a different part of the castle. (Which he now knew it was, it may have been a mansion on the outside but inside it was clear it was like the limo...drastically bigger on the inside.

   At any rate, as soon as they got to either bed, they would make insane, loud, rowdy sex far into the night until they collapsed from exhaustion. Then they'd wake up and do it all over again.

   This went on for about 2 months. The two men fell deeper and deeper in love. The collection of Justin's paintings, especially the ones of Brian grew. The countdown on Brian's arm counted steadily down.

   Eventually, Brian took a nice selection of paintings and sketches and sent them to his friend Lindsay in Pittsburgh. Lindsay, in turn, had connections in the art community and sent copies to a few agents. Some rejected them and sent them back but one astute one wanted more. So Justin kept painting, the agent kept sending them to dealers and they started selling.

   And soon after that, they sold well enough that they wanted Justin to have his own show in the gallery Lindsay worked at, the Sidney Bloom gallery. And they asked for Justin to be there personally to host the whole thing.

   Justin refused. Period.

   "But Justin! I thought this is what you wanted! To be an artist and a success! To be a self made man and have the means to travel and paint or...or just do whatever you want!"

   "My wants have changed, Brian. It's true, I'd like that but not if it takes me away from you. I never want to be apart from you. Besides, the timing's all wrong. The deadline of the spell to break is only two weeks away."

   "Then we have two weeks. If you went...and came back to me...in time to break the spell....then you could host your show."

   "But...I don't want to leave you! Maybe you could come! Maybe I'm ready to break the spell now! Then you could come with me and we'd never have to come back to this terrible place again!"

   "You are not ready."

   "You don't know that! Maybe I am!" Justin said rebelliously.

   Brian sighed heavily. Sadly he removed his hat and cage crown.

   Justin screamed and jumped behind the bed.

   "That's how I know you are not ready. That's why I need my private time in the morning and during the day," Brian said as he replaced everything. "You can come out now."

   Justin did so, a little shamefacedly.

   Brian came over, properly covered up and wrapped him in his huge embrace. "I cannot come with you. I will be too much of an oddity and the slightest mishap could cause a disaster. Besides, my wants have changed too."

   "What do you mean?" Justin asked, anxiously, "Don't you still want me?"

   "I want you...every second of every minute of every hour of every day of every week of every year so that I can barely stand it. What I wanted...and no longer do...was to hide you away and have you all to myself and have you to hold and possess so that nobody else could have you or see you ever again. But I see now...you are too beautiful for that. The things you create are too beautiful. Already you belong to everybody else. And when this show is complete, you will be successful and rich and free...free to roam the world....or come back to me."

   "No! No! I don't want to ever leave you!" Justin hugged him fiercely and sobbed into his shoulder.

   "Oh dear!" Brian said in true remorse, "It seems I have trained you too well."

   "But I don't understand! Why do the snakes still affect me so? I know that...I mean, I must...I love you Brian! I love you! And we make love all the time!"

   "Sex is not the answer. We have a yard full of my mistakes to attest to that. And as for you...you love as much of me as you can get. But I still stay carefully covered for you and you as yet cannot and do not seek anything further. It is the nature of the curse."

   "Then the curse is cruel! You do not deserve it!"

   Brian smiled regretfully and stoked his cheek. "I did. I see that now. I did deserve it!"

   "But you've changed! You had changed by the time I got here and since then you have changed further still! You do not deserve this anymore! And I don't want to do this without you!"

   "You must. And you will. You will and you will be brilliant. As brilliant as the Sunshine you are named after."

   But Justin just buried his face into his neck and wept as if his heart would break.

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   Well, of course Brian got his way. He always did. It was one of the things that irked Justin about him but he loved him so much now he usually could overlook it. But now, in this instance, when he was faced with the reality of separation, he could not overlook it and it affected him strongly to the point of depression.

   He begged and pleaded with his handsome hunk but Brian was deaf to it all. And so, finally, Justin just sat there morosely as Brian packed his suitcase for him, somehow finding suit after gorgeous suit in his wardrobe, chattering about how his show was going to be so successful and how lovely it was going to be to see family again and even chattered about the best clubs to go to after where all the hottest guys were.

   "Oh, Brian, I don't care about any of that! I don't even want to leave here right now! I don't want any hot guys! I only want you!"

   "Oh, well, thank you very much!" said Brian, pretending offence.

   "What I mean is..." Justin sighed hugely and got up to embrace his huge lover. He laced his hands around the back of Brian's neck and gazed into the brown, gold flecked orbs. "Is that you are the hottest, hunkiest guy I could ask for, that and that any club hottie would be lukewarm compared to the fire of your kiss, and that I'd rather spend eternity in your embrace with our golden flowers than one night with any handsome face. When I first came here, I wasn't sure but I do now. You're it for me. You. My one, my only...my beautiful Beast!" And he leaned up and kissed Brian thoroughly, tongue fucking him till he heard Brian groan in pleasure.

   "You got that right," Brian said when they came up for air. "And don't you forget it!"

   "What! Why you...! Brian Kinney! You have an ego that could eat New York!"

   "Ahhhh, but instead you're talent will eat it! First the Pitts! Then the Big Apple! Then the world will be your oyster!"

   "What's with all the food references? Are you hungry?" asked Justin cheekily.

   Brian threw a pillow at him.

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   At last the time had come.

   Brian kept up the chipper routine, carried his bags down to the door, made sure he had his tickets and kept up a steady stream of talk to the point that Justin didn't have opportunity to get a word in edgewise. And then they were at the door.

   "Remember Boy! Remember who you are! Whoever you're with, always use a condom, and no kissing on the mouth! Never forget you are still mine! You still belong to me! You have a week! After that you must return to me! Understand Boy!?"

   "Yes Sir! A week! I'll be back!" Justin understood Brian was in Dom mode and answered accordingly.

   "There is a chance you will be tempted to stray or not return. Justin...I want you to leave me the mirror."

   "Brian no! Don't you trust me!? Please! Don't do this! I will come back!"

   "Justin...you're so young! You're so beautiful! You may meet someone! Your success may be great...so great you may not be able to come back. All I want is that you don't leave me with any recourse, with no way out. Leave me the mirror."

   Tears were streaming down his face as Justin handed it over. He could see that Brian had his mind made up.

   "Promise me! Promise me you will not use this until the last possible second! I promise...I WILL return! Do not use it! Not unless it's really too late!"

   "I promise!" said Brian.

   They embraced passionately, kissed fiercely.

   "I love you," Justin whispered.

   "I know." Brian replied.

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   Outside was another surprise.

   The Wards had combined into another car to take him to the airport but this time, they had combined to form a sleek, black version of the Knight Rider car!

   They both stared goggle eyed and speechless for about a minute. They couldn't help it. They were just so flabbergasted.

   "I...get to ride in that!!? Brian, it's too much!" Justin exclaimed.

   "Hey, I had nothing to do with this," Brian protested.

   Then the car spoke and a red light pulsed in time with the words just like the real Knight Rider car. Really, it was the Knight Rider car...except....

   "Hi Sweetie! Ready to go hon?" asked the car in Emmett's unmistakable voice.

   "He's having a little separation anxiety," Brian said, "But he's all ready to go."

   "I'm not at all ready! Brian, don't do this! How can you just shove me out the door like this and..."

   "Like this..."Brian said, shoving him out the door and towards the car, "Enjoy your week out." He tossed his bags in the back. "Come back promptly." He bundled Justin into the front as effortlessly as if he were one of the bags and slammed the door. "And remember what I told you. Remember whose you are.  How to behave. One week."

   "Brian don't do..." Justin quailed under Brian's uncompromising stare. "Yes. Yes, I'll remember. Oh Brian, how can you do this..."

   "Get him out of here," Brian said brusquely and turned his back on him. Without saying another word he strode back to the house and slammed the door.

   The car began to slowly move out and down the driveway and Justin could hardly believe that it was happening. He began to cry softly.

   "How can he do that!? How can he shut me out and shove me out and turn his back on me like that!" How can he just toss me aside like that and not even care!?"

   "Simple, sweetie! He can't. You'll see." Came Emmett's chipper voice from the dashboard.

   "What do you mean?" Didn't you just see what he...?"

   "Wait for it!" said Emmett. They had reached the end of the driveway.

   "Wait for what? I don't understand!!"

   "Wait for it!" was all that Emmett would say as he turned onto the road and began to drive slowly away.

   Justin was about to ask what he was talking about again, when suddenly IT came.

   AAAAAAAARRRRRROOOOOOOOOAAAAWWWWWWRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

   At first sad and then of agonizing anger and then pain, the roar rolled out across the fields and hills, louder and louder, more and more powerful, never seeming to reach a crescendo. The inside of the solidly built car began to vibrate a little.   The roaring grew more and more...intense...more powerful. It began to vibrate within Justin's very body, his mind. It was so loud and long now it was just a long, sustained, subsonic hum that Justin was sure could be heard for many miles in every direction.

   At long last it began to fade away and slowly it dwindled away to nothing. Justin was still sad but he was comforted a little.

   "He does care. That was for me. All for me. But I don't understand. If he loves me, and he obviously does, why did he push me away? Why?"

   "Maybe sweetie....Maybe he wants to see what some time away from him will do for you. And to see what you will do with the choice he's set before you."

   "I don't understand. What choice?"

   "Oh well, that's very simple isn't it? To escape...or to return."

   "But I didn't even want to go!"

   "Ahhhhhhh, but now you have sweetie! And who knows how long that resolution will stay with you?"

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   The car speeded up and went faster and faster and faster. As before, they encountered no other traffic on the way to town. There was a blur of...of something....a kind of difference and Justin figured that was the village. And then there was nothing but countryside again and the car was going even faster...and faster...and faster. Pretty soon the outside began going by in a blur and it seemed to Justin as if the whole world was moving around them and they were standing still.  And perhaps that's what was happening.

   After a little while, Emmett piped up and said: "Sweetie, if it's all right, the others and I have been talking. We have a little something for you but if you take it, it's strictly hush-hush. We probably shouldn't be doing this. Probably violating parole and all that. But we've all discussed it and decided that it was worth the risk."

   "What is it?" asked Justin eagerly. He was tired of feeling sad and weepy and the thought of a gift was a real perk up.

   The dashboard popped open and the inside tray slid out. On the center was a ring, pure silver and intricately carved.

   "This ring is a way back. After your week is up, simply put it on and twist it three times on your finger and say: "There's no place like home." You will be instantly transported back to the castle."

   Justin fought back a strong impulse to giggle. "Oh Em! Really!? For goodness sake!"

   "Well!" the voice of the car said impishly, "I figured, since my counterpart ..and me too for that matter... ARE named Auntie Em, I may as well not let it go to waste!"

   Justin picked up the ring and slid it onto his left hand ring finger. It was the only finger it would fit. "Well, thank you, Emmett. Thank you all."

   "You're welcome Justin. Remember...Keep it secret. Keep it safe. Treat it like it was a trinket, not worth anything and everyone else will too. All four of us have imbued it with a portion of our magic which as I said, we are not sure is allowed. But we are doing it anyway, to show that we love you as well as the Master and to give you help in a time of trouble or if you simply cannot get home in time.

   "Trouble? What trouble could there be?"

   "One never knows these things. But it's better to be safe than sorry, isn't it Sweetie!?"

   "I suppose you're right. Thank you all again. I'll keep in private and I won't take it off."

   "That's good honey. Well....We're here."

   And the landscape slowed from the blur and evened out and then stopped and Justin could see they were suddenly at an airport.

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   Brian walked and wandered the vast and now lonely halls of his huge castle. His snakes were free, his face unmasked. What did it matter now? The mirror was in a drawer somewhere face down.

   Eventually, he came to the courtyard. Slowly he descended the steps and even more slowly wandered the twisting paths through the many gardens and men whose lives he had cut short.

   His shoulders were bowed and he missed Justin with a physical ache in his stomach. He had no idea how he was going to get to sleep that night without his ray of Sunshine to warm his body and his bed. He didn't know that he even wanted to try.

   He remembered the morning when he had made up his mind. He had woken up first, a rare occurrence. He had watched Justin sleep, his smooth, white, alabaster skin and golden hair contrasting starkly against the black silk sheets. Justin's cupid bow lips were curved into a small smile that conveyed perfect peace and utter contentment. His hair had grown over his scar and concealed it completely and anyway it was nothing more than a white line now anyway. He looked like an angel sleeping there. And he knew.

   He knew he was not worthy to have an angel in his bed. He was not worthy to be loved by such beauty. He was not worthy to own such beauty. His art was not worthy to be locked up for his eyes only. Justin's art and Justin himself belonged to the world and soon he would belong to the ages. And so he had hardened his heart, woken his angel and started the process of letting him go and setting him free.

   What was that phrase? If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, it's yours to keep? Something like that.

   The only trouble was, Brian wasn't free. The little twat had gotten under his skin and wormed his way into almost every room of his house and his heart. Every time he closed his eyes the only thing he could see behind his lids were a pair of wide, expressive blue eyes. Anytime he saw anything yellow he was reminded of the yellow blond of his hair. His phantom musical laugh echoed through his mind till he could almost hear it like a physical sound.

   For hours, Brian wandered the gardens, looking woefully at the stones that were once men. More than once he had sat on a stone bench and gazed up at the terror filled effigy, wondering what he would tell him, what advice that guy would have given him, what he would say to ease his broken spirit. If there was anything he could say.

   Finally, he reached the center of the garden and "their" garden. There were twelve golden flowers growing there now. The emptiness of the circle matched the emptiness of his heart. He lowered himself onto the bench across from it and stared at it, his vision blurry for a long time.

   Suddenly, he covered his face with his hands and he shoulders bowed and shook silently. There was no sound but his body was wracked with grief that he could not express.

   For he knew he had made a grave error in letting Justin go. The spell would never be broken. He would never be free. And worst of all, he would never see his ray of Sunshine again.

   Justin would not come back. Why would he? Given the choice between a world of beauty and a monster of ugliness, one who would most likely send him to his death, the choice was simple. Brian knew which one he'd choose. Who wouldn't?

   He was never going to see Justin again.

TBC