Chapter 19

Would you like to have an adventure now, or would you like to have your tea first?

J.M. Barrie

Emmett had removed the full length mirror from the bathroom and covered the one over the sink so Jane could not see herself until Brian wanted her to. She was beginning to feel a little claustrophobic as Lara and Emmett helped her get dressed in the confines of the bathroom but did her best not to show it, given her excitement to see how the outfit looked on her.

As Emmett hooked the wide bands on the back of the bodice, she reflected on what Brian's gift had meant to him. It was, for him, a way for him to provide an avenue of empowerment after what he could only assume was a residual feeling of weakness, on her part, after her episode. He had no way of knowing, at the time he did it, that she had had them before and was well practiced at recovering from them.

Still, the gesture was there, and she knew his project had just as much to do with him as he felt it did with her. Brian had obviously felt weakened and powerless from her ordeal and his gift was a way for him to take back control and empower himself as well.

Emmett was chattering away, Jane only half listening, when Lara stood up from fastening Jane's boots. She held out the long black, shiny, coat and Jane slipped her arms into the sleeves admiring the cut of the patent leather. Lara fastened the lapels and pronounced Jane ready for her close up.

She was told to stay where she was until they had everything ready for her big entrance and slipped out the door. What she could see, looking down at herself was impressive and when she twisted and moved about, there was an alarming ease of movement that leather usually didn't have, explained by the cleverly placed, wide strip of elastic, that ran the length of the sleeve next to her torso.

She especially liked the boots. Being barely over five feet tall, when she chose to wear heels she had a penchant for ankle breakers. The higher the better. The boots she had on were a two-inch platform sole, making the ice pick heels top out at eight inches. They were plain black patent leather with a rounded square toe and rose to the widest part of her calf. What was really cool about them, was the back half of the leg. From just above the ankle to the top, was not leather, but a series of three-inch-wide, tight knit elastic bands affixed with bright chrome hooks on one side, linked through matching metal grommets on the other, securing them to her legs. All in all, they were comfortable and moved easily as she flexed and bent her legs.

She didn't hear Lulah's knock, so she was a little startled when the woman stuck her head in the door. "They are all ready for you, dear."

"Oh. Okay, just give me a minute."

Lulah left and Jane took a deep steadying breath as she hoped they wouldn't be disappointed after all their hard work.

When she stepped from the bathroom into the workroom, she looked at all of them arranged around the periphery, and tried to gauge their reactions. She saw Emmett and Lara first, seated on the bed, with Lara holding the camera, obviously filming her. Emmett's hands flew up to his cheeks, a broad grin on his face, even though he looked like he could cry. Lara was smiling and nodding her head in approval. She took another tentative step, watching as Noah pushed off the wall behind Lulah and put a hand on the woman's shoulder, a surprised gleam in his eye, as she patted his hand in acknowledgement. Marc turned towards her from the desk, went completely still, no emotion showing on his face but for one raised brow.

Moving to the center of the room, she finally turned to Brian, hoping she would live up to his expectations. He came to her, circling her body, a finger pressed to his lips as he checked her out from all sides before stopping in front of her, effectively shutting out everyone else in the room. He was so close, that even with the extra height of the shoes, she still had to tilt her head back to make eye contact. A look passed between them, as he snaked his arm around her waist, gently tugging them chest to chest, tilting his head so he could brush his lips over hers, watching her as he did it.

Jane watched him back, kissed him back, knowing it wasn't sexual. It was Brian's way of communicating that she wore the outfit well. His eyes were telling her he understood that she knew it was as much for him as her. They spoke of appreciation and admiration for what she had, and would continue to do for him. They spoke of a shared sadness and shone with thanks for having someone to share it with. He touched his forehead to hers and after a few seconds that seemed like a lifetime, he pulled away.

Marc cleared his throat, gesturing with a hand, asking Jane if he could come closer. She squared her shoulders and gave him her full attention as he stopped a couple feet away and opened his palm.

"We thought you might like to have these." He seemed a bit flustered, and when she looked into his hand, she saw two rectangular pins. They were military unit-pins and she recognized them as being Navy Special Forces. "Noah and I each have one, and we would like it if you would wear them." Marc flushed a little at the admission but pushed his hand a little closer for Jane to take them. She picked one up and examined its flat silver surface and its inscription.

"Adversa in pace." Jane read the words with their simple solid outline around the edge of the pin.

"It's Latin for..." Marc was saying, but Jane smiled and finished for him. "Through adversity, Peace." she said. He nodded at her accurate translation.

"It has always been one of my most favorite sayings." Jane handed him back the pin. "Will you do the honors, Commander?"

Marc swelled with pride, stepping closer so he could affix a pin to each side of the standing, mock collar of her coat. When he was done, he stepped back and took in the full view. "You look...fiercely magnificent." Then he left, embarrassed by his emotional display, causing a low chuckle to run around the occupants of the room.

Lara put down the camera as Emmett bussed each of Jane's cheeks, still unable to speak he was so happy, leading the others away.

That seemed to spark a fire in Brian since he picked up the camera and began snapping photos of her from every angle, giving her instructions on how to pose and what expressions to use, every once in a while moving various body parts until the look he wanted was achieved, all the while talking about Justin and Michael, and their comic book ‘Rage'.

Jane allowed him his creativity for over two hours before she could no longer stifle her curiosity or her yawns. Brian finally relented and let her go take a shower and change into her pajamas, while he transferred the digital material to his laptop, so long as she promised not to look at herself in the mirror while she was gone. Jane agreed on the condition that he had something for her to eat when she got back.

He used the time to make a plate of Pringles and spray cheese "sandwiches", and photo-shop the backgrounds in most of the stills he had taken and arranging them into a slide show. He wrote out some notes for ideas he wanted to run by Jane and when he heard the shower flip off, he went to the new refrigerator in the room and retrieved a Mountain Dew.

He was just lighting a cigarette and leaning back in the desk chair when she came back from across the hall and sat next to him in the other new chair.

"What's this?" she asked, spying the plate.

"It's my equivalent of graham cracker cookies."

She picked one up, bit into and chewed. "Not bad." She ate a few more before she couldn't contain herself anymore. "All right! You win. Show me, show me, show me!"

She was bouncing in her seat, an exaggerated plea on her face and Brian imagined her, for a moment, as a child begging for an early Christmas present.

He picked up the camera and filmed her. "Press enter." he said, sitting to the side so he had a good angle of her face as she watched the presentation.

Jane took in everything with eager eyes and when the last slide faded she hit the start button again without ever looking at Brian. She barely recognized herself in the photos, the makeup transforming her features into something else. The lack of color other than black on the outfit drew the viewer's eye to her face and hair with its bold use of metallic tones. The "mask" sharpened her cheekbones and made her eyes seem larger and piercing. Her hair was windswept and tipped with silver, hinting at other than earthly origins.

The patent leather coat, with its short, open, mock collar, lent length to her throat and fastened into a point at the base with the same hardware as her boots, before cutting away to the armpit and coming back to another point just below her bust-line and repeating the fixture, exposing the brocade of the bodice underneath. The lower flaps of the coat each had another hook which could attach to the companion grommets on the back of the coat's waist, pulling them back out of the way and freeing her legs from the long confines, revealing the lining in the same fabric as the bodice, and giving her access to her utility belt. The sleeves ended in loops that wrapped the base of her fingers and thumbs giving the illusion of gloves while leaving her hands mostly bare. The shoulders were fitted and crisp, and with the metal fasteners and the agent's gifts, it had a decidedly military feel, but maintained its own futuristic flavor.

When the computer started playing the slides without the coat, Jane leaned in.

The brocade bodice, modelled after an old fashioned corset, but lacking the hard boning, pushed her breasts into a pleasing, yet modest décolletage, hugging her like a second skin all the way to her hips, emphasizing their flair while making her waist appear miraculously smaller. Jane appreciated that and attributed it, again, to the very clever use of the wide elastic bands on the back. The brocade fabric ended on the sides of her torso. The elastic had been sewn in strips that lay right next to each other so they stacked up the back of the bodice, each with its own fastener. The hardware matching that on her coat and boots. Whoever was responsible for that, had made sure that the bands were size perfect and kept everything snug and in place.

When standing upright, the bands appeared one solid piece with the hardware mimicking her spine. When she moved, magic happened. The elastic would move with her and in doing so, would separate from each other and reveal tantalizing bits of skin without ever revealing her scars. The pants were matte black leather in front and black satin spandex in back, giving her freedom of motion and support. Everything fit like a second skin and the utility belt that fastened around the waist and thigh, alluded to protective services, and carried her knife.

The whole ensemble was contemporary with its crisp lines and sharp geometry in monochromatic black accented with the chrome hardware. It was feminine too, its hint of Antebellum Lady curves accented nicely with the brief flashes of flesh that invoked the idea of sexy and not being racy or slutty.

Brian turned off the camera when Jane hit play a third time and started talking to her about his ideas. He opened a bag of Doritos, sharing them with her. The more Jane listened, the more excited she became and it wasn't long before she was adding her own input, sending Brian into excited note taking. They bounced ideas back and forth, finally calling it quits as dawn peeked over the horizon.

The next few days went by in a flurry of activity. Brian designed two more, much simpler, outfits for Jane keeping to the use of the elastic and hardware with the black, maintaining the theme. Lulah swapped out the old, brown leather on one of Dandy's halter and bridles for black leather and small link chain. Brian was adamant that Jane continue to ride him without a saddle, so she and Lulah made a matching strap for her feet similar to the rope she had originally used.

Brian filmed her incessantly. He staged mock battles with the agents, using the corn syrup and food coloring to imitate blood and the spray bottle to apply it liberally. Jane's limited martial arts training came in handy and the battles soon became complex scenes they all thoroughly enjoyed for the workout and the fun.

They all settled into a routine, everyone did chores first thing in the morning, Brian included, then after lunch, they would work on whatever Brian had cooked up for them, and in the evenings he and Jane would hole up in their room eating junk food and talking. Brian found Jane to be insightful and easy to confide in.

By the fourth day, he became increasingly frustrated that he couldn't get the close up shots of Jane, as she raced Dandy, that he wanted. Marc suggested that they take the camper shell off the truck and film from the back as they drove next to horse and rider.

Brian pounced on the idea, not once making a crack about the "banana-mobile" and paced the yard waiting for the guys to get the shell removed.

"Don't even think you are getting in the back of that thing to film." Lara said from the porch.

Brian lit a cigarette, puffing hastily. "How else am I supposed to get the shot?"

"It is too dangerous. Get someone else to do it."

"They don't know what I'm looking for or how to frame it. It has to be me." he replied testily.

Lara moved off into the lodge, only to return a few minutes later with all the extra yardage of parachute cord. She had only been able to buy it in a fifty-yard hank, so there was still plenty of it left.

Brian said nothing when she stomped to him, looping the cording through his legs, around his hips and up the back of his torso and under the armpits, over the shoulders, gathering the ends behind his back, making a harness. When he climbed into the back of the truck she secured him to the cargo hooks on the back of the cab and crouched behind him with her arms wrapped tightly around his thighs, praying, to whatever deity watched over idiots with a death wish.

Noah climbed in with them and pounded a fist on the roof of the cab, letting Marc know they were ready. Brian signaled to Jane and she started Dandy into a trot, checking to see if he would have a problem being near a moving vehicle. He didn't. In fact, he seemed to enjoy the competition, pulling at the reins to go faster and Jane let him have his head.

Justin was watching Coby fiddle with his computer, trying to fix what Justin had purposely screwed up to get him in his studio, all the while complaining about his girlfriend. Justin had met Coby while he was setting up the new computer equipment in his studio almost a week before. He had cultivated a friendship with the younger man in order to aid his quest to find Brian. Coby worked for Everett in the IT department and Justin was working up to making his request by listening to his troubles over the last few days. When Coby lamented that he wished there was some way to make up with his girlfriend, Justin saw his chance.

"What if I could help you?" he said.

"Huh?"

"We could trade surprises."

Coby turned his direction, in interest.

Justin said, "I have a friend who lives in another state that has a birthday coming up and I wanted to surprise him with a gift." Justin wandered over to the table Coby was sitting at. "I lost his address and if I call him about it, he will get the hint and my surprise will be for shit." Justin pretended supreme embarrassment and looked away guiltily. "If you gave me a picture of your girlfriend, I could replicate it on canvas for you and you would have a really nice gift to use to make up with her."

Coby's eyes narrowed. "What do I have to do?"

Justin pulled out his phone, "You could use your equipment and tell me where this call and photo came from, so I can send my friend his gift and still keep it a surprise."

Brian came down the steps announcing his need to shop somewhere other than the local supercenter. When Lulah suggested the mall in Jackson, he figured it was the best he was going to get in rural Mississippi and they made plans to go, after the chores were finished, to grab lunch in town and hit up the mall further down the highway.

Jane wanted to drive the big yellow beast and since Brian wanted to continue sharing his childhood with her, elected to ride in it, leaving Marc and Noah to follow in the Suburban, giving them privacy.

They had lunch in a roadside café boasting the best ribs in the state and Jane liked them so much, she ordered a second entrée to-go, saying they would make a good midnight snack. Brian had to admit they were good and was still a bit shocked he had eaten everything on his plate and also what was left on Jane's.

Thirty minutes after getting back on the highway, she took the exit for the mall and waited at the light at the end of the exit ramp. Brian stopped talking when he saw her eyes latch onto something on the far left side of the intersection. Following her gaze, he saw a scrawny older man on the median holding a sign that said: Veteran. Will work for food.

He didn't have much time to think about it, when the light changed, and Jane eased the truck into the intersection and turned, pulling to a stop next to the median and parked, hitting the button for the hazard lights. Marc followed suit in the Suburban, effectively blocking two lanes of traffic.

Jane didn't say anything, digging in her purse for her wallet and snagging her takeout bag from the backseat. Getting out and closing the door behind her left Brian in silence, unable to hear what she was saying to the man. He looked out the back window, seeing Marc step out and lean on the hood of the Suburban, keeping an eye on the proceedings.

Brian turned back to Jane and the stranger. She was showing him something in her wallet and handing him the food. Brian saw his mouth move in thanks as Jane extracted a business card and handed it to him. The man tucked it into the inside pocket of his tattered camouflage jacket and turned to look where she was now pointing across the intersection, to the ramp leading back to the highway. The stranger shook his head for a few seconds, said something Brian couldn't make out and watched in astonishment when Jane hugged the filthy man as he started to cry.

Horns started honking at the delay, but Jane didn't let go until the man had collected himself and pulled away from her. They had another short conversation and Jane climbed back into the truck, put on her seatbelt, and moved back into traffic.

She said nothing about the exchange and Brian didn't press her. When she pulled into a Walgreen's a couple of blocks away, she radioed Marc that she wouldn't be long and hopped out of the vehicle, disappearing into the store.

Brian got out and followed her from a distance, watching as she pushed a cart through the aisles, selecting toiletries, bottled water, and shelled nuts. She added a package of socks, underwear and razors, a bar of soap and a plastic travel case for it along with some washcloths and baby wipes. Passing the electronics counter, she selected a pay as you go cell phone and asked the teenager behind the counter to activate it for her as she continued to shop, selecting a card from the display for a year's worth of service and handing it over with her credit card. After she paid and left him working on it, she went back to the aisles, picking up a dark blue backpack from the school supplies section and spending several minutes choosing prepaid gift cards for various restaurants in the area and a visa gift card.

Going back to the teenager, she collected the phone, made sure it was activated and moved to the front of the store to check out. Brian moved in behind her and when she turned, said "I'm out of cigarettes. Thought I would get some since we were already here."

When it was her turn, he helped her load the stuff on the counter and instead of bagging it, she had the cashier put everything in the backpack. The cashier asked Jane how much she wanted to make the visa gift card for and Jane told her a thousand dollars without batting an eyelash. She swiped her card and after making sure the backpack was fully zippered and secured, she put her cart away, standing to the side and waiting for Brian to finish his purchase.

When he had his bag in hand, she silently led the way back outside and they continued on to the mall. Brian wanted to browse, but after forty minutes of Jane distractedly checking her watch every few minutes, he gave in and quickly grabbed a couple pairs of jeans, two casual button down shirts, two long sleeved Henley's and a new pair of work boots with matching gloves.

Noah carried his bags and once they were back in the vehicles, Jane wasted no time getting them back to the intersection. She was glancing around, a little distressed, until the man noticed the yellow truck and stepped out from behind the support pillar for the overpass. She repeated her parking maneuver, Marc following suit, and got out toting the backpack. She was talking to the man again, showing him the phone, and Brian really wanted to hear what she was saying. She was gesticulating with her hands, emphasizing her words, while the veteran shook his head with lessening degrees of fervor. He wanted to roll down his window and listen but didn't because the idea of eavesdropping on what was apparently a private and passionate exchange left him feeling too intrusive.

When the man ducked his head and Jane briefly hugged him again, Brian knew Jane had won him over. Taking his elbow, she shouldered the new backpack and his battered, drab olive duffle and led him to the truck, opening the back door so he could climb in. She rounded the vehicle, opening the opposite back door and handed in his bags, which he immediately pulled close to him on the seat.

The smell was horrendous and Brian cracked his window for some fresh air.

Jane put the truck in gear and made the turn getting them back on the highway. She was focused on the road when she said, "Brian, this is Staff Sergeant Granvil. Staff Sergeant, this is Mr. Brian Kinney."

"Nice to meet you, Sir." came the scratchy voice from the back seat.

"Pleasure." Brian said, doing his best to breathe through his mouth.

Jane glanced in the rearview mirror, saying "I see from your unit patch, you were part of the K-9 troops in Vietnam. How long did you serve?"

"Did four tours in Nam, coupla more after that in other places ‘til they disbanded us."

Jane hummed her understanding. "Why don't you go ahead and eat, it will be about forty minutes until we get home, then we will get you settled in."

Brian's radio squawked, making their passenger startle, and he turned it off, sending Marc a message for silence by doing so.

When they made the turnoff for the lodge, Brian nudged the man to wake him up, making his eyes dart around quickly until he remembered where he was. Jane parked and opened his door, carrying his bags again, as she gently steered him by the elbow into the house and one of the smaller, empty bedrooms on the first floor. She was gone for several minutes, the rest of them milling in the living room, then she came back out, dug through Brian's shopping bags and disappeared again with one of his new outfits, including the boots after checking the size.

Lulah and Emmett came in from the kitchen, wanting to know what was going on. Noah explained as much as he knew and Jane came back telling no one in particular that their guest was in the shower.

"I will set another place at the table." Lulah said, and as she turned back to the kitchen, Brian saw the moment Jane realized what she had done by bringing a stranger into their midst.

Her face went ashen as she tried to apologize, "Brian, I'm sor..."

"DON'T!" Brian barked, startling everyone. He marched over to her, grabbing her chin to make her look at him. "Don't ever apologize. Not to me, or anyone else, for doing something, you know, is right. Understand?"

Jane stared at him, nodding, before leaving to check on Staff Sergeant Granvil.

"I don't think Brian or Everett would like us using their equipment for something so trivial, so I would like to keep it between us, if you don't mind. I feel kinda silly about the whole thing and Brian would never let me live it down, so I'd like to keep it quiet."

Justin was laying it on thick and Coby was nodding along, carrying his new painting of his girlfriend, grateful for a way to get back into her good graces. "It's no problem. Everett is already gone, it's just me and one other guy tonight and he's on rounds. It shouldn't take more than an hour or so."

Justin followed him into Everett's command center and watched as Coby plugged Justin's phone into a specialized dock, then scrolled through the information that appeared on the computer screen. When he signaled for Justin to pick the call he wanted traced, Justin stuck a finger on the screen and Coby highlighted it with the cursor and inputted a search command.

A bunch of stuff Justin didn't know anything about played over the screen until twenty minutes later it stopped and Coby wrote down the address that had been displayed. Justin grinned as he picked up the sticky note and his phone, thanking Coby and wishing him luck with the girlfriend before leaving.

Dinner was a subdued affair in deference to their timid guest. Jane had spent some time cutting his hair and he now sat freshly shaven, in new clothes, next to her at the table, eating as if it were the last meal he would ever have.

Brian remembered the sharp pangs of hunger from his childhood and kept refilling his plate and passing the Sergeant the serving bowls after, so the man wouldn't feel embarrassed about the amount of food he was consuming since Brian was doing it too. Marc picked up on it and did the same, Emmett smiling at the silent closing of ranks around their newest member.

When Lulah mentioned to Brian that he was back on puppy duty, Granvil perked up, asking about the dogs.

"I could help you with that, Ma'am, in payment for your hospitality."

Lulah sent Jane a look, seeing in the younger woman's face, that that had been exactly what she had been hoping for. Lulah gave the Sergeant a terse nod, accepting his help, "Let's go then. It's almost dark, and the horses need to be bedded too."

Granvil stood, setting his napkin on the table, addressing the room at large, "Ladies. Sirs." by way of excusing himself. He grabbed two more dinner rolls, one for each hand, and hurried after Lulah as she left the house.

Jane started clearing the table and everyone took her cue to stand up and help put the kitchen back in order.

Later, Jane was curled against Brian's side, about to fall asleep, when she thought she heard him say, "You did good."

The Staff Sergeant proved himself a hard worker over the next days, jumping in to help wherever it was needed, whether it was in the kitchen or the barn didn't matter. He worked just as hard as everyone else, no complaints, keeping mostly to himself.

He was working with Bear, late in the afternoon, just outside the open barn doors when Marc approached Jane while she was mucking the sorrel's stall. Brian was next door in Dandy's, doing the same, one-handed, when he heard Marc speak.

"Why'd you do it?" He must have gestured in Granvil's direction because Jane knew what he was talking about.

She said, "If not me, then who?"

Brian stuck his head out of the stall to see Marc heading away when Jane's voice came again. "Superpowers aren't worth shit, unless you use them."

When Marc turned to reply, he saw Brian eavesdropping, shot him a smile and sauntered off to get to know the Sergeant a little better.

To:SunnyBoy@Trix4Kix.net

From:ThunderStud@Trix4Kix.net

Attachments: 3

I have a new Superhero for you to play with. Attached is a set of stills, videos, and a word document of possible storylines.

Please play nice. I care about her.

I Love You.

Later

Justin stared, slack-jawed at Brian's email. Not only had he declared his love, but he admitted to caring about someone else too. A woman. Other than Cynthia, (whom he had known forever), Debbie, (his surrogate mother), and Lindsay, (the mother of his child), Justin had never known Brian to ever care about a woman. In fact, he had never heard Brian declare positive feelings, even about the existing women in his life, let alone a new one.

Clicking on the attachments to open them, Justin selected the storylines first. After reading them twice he opened the slide show. He watched it play through, Brian's capture of stills that appeared to move, almost mesmerizing. He had expected some crude drawings but the photos of a real human woman brought Brian's idea to life. Justin could feel the energy and passion Brian had for the subject and Justin hurried to open the video, his gut clenching in excitement over the project and the fear of Brian's all too obvious affection for her.

He hit the play button, and the scene opened on dense trees, leaves lazily swaying in the wind. The faint sound of hooves came from somewhere out of frame and a flock of birds took flight at the noise. It grew louder, the camera turning to look down a country lane as horse and rider came around the bend, racing into the scene.

Justin could already tell it was the woman from the stills, astride the biggest horse he had ever seen, shouting a fierce battle cry, right arm holding a knife flung out behind her, thundering into the camera, where horse and rider were paced, a close up of the determination on her face, before the camera let them go and watched as they disappeared out of sight.

The next scenes were mock battles, complete with bloodshed, and he recognized the agents that had accompanied Brian on his self-imposed exile. They were dramatic and forceful. Brian's super hero was modestly feminine and supremely sexual without once being overt. It was all in how she moved and the peeks of flesh her costume revealed.

A perfect counterpoint for Rage.

Justin saved the email and closed his laptop, staring into space, wondering what the fuck was going on.

Five hours later- Justin's studio

To:ThunderStud@Trix4Kix.net

From:SunnyBoy@Trix4Kix.net

What is her name and superpower?

I love you too.

Later

Justin tapped his fingers on the desk, wondering if Brian would get back to him any time soon when his computer signaled and incoming email.

To:SunnyBoy@Trix4Kix.net

From:ThunderStud@Trix4Kix.net

Tempest (alter ego- Temperance)

Her heart.   ;)

I will send you more as it is generated.

Later

WHAT THE FUCK!

Justin panicked. Not only was Brian talking about his feelings, but he was using emoticons too?!

Justin's world tipped on its axis and sent him reeling for the door and the safety of their apartment, where he hastily packed a small duffle. Enough was enough.

He absently answered the door when the bell rang.

Just as she had every morning since her episode, Jane was sitting on the closed toilet, wrapped in a towel and smoking. "Brian, I want to talk to you about what is going to happen after I leave here." Brian's gut clenched at the thought of not having her around.

"I think it is important that we discuss your triggers and how best to avoid them and if you can't do that, how to work through them yourself."

Brian shampooed his hair.

"You probably already know that stress is a big factor for you. Have you thought about how you are going to handle it when life returns to normal?"

Normal. What the fuck was normal for him anyway?

"Jane, I can't think of hardly anything in my life that could be called normal."

"I get that, but what I mean is normal for you. What would you like normal to be for you?"

Brian rinsed the soap off of his body, moved the shower head so it sprayed the wall and reached a hand out of the stall for a towel. Wrapping it around his waist, he stepped out, taking the cigarette from Jane and shrugging. She stepped in, removed her towel, ran the edge through the towel bar and closed the stall.

"I don't know." he said. "I haven't really thought about it." He checked himself out in the mirror.

"Sure you have. Otherwise you wouldn't be talking to me. You wanted something different than what you already had. Something better, so you made the decision to change."

His reflection told him he had already done some changing. He had needed a haircut before the opening of Justin's show and now it was even longer. He hadn't used a styling product or the hairdryer on it since his stay in the hospital and its wavy lengths could now be tucked behind his ears. He hadn't shaved since Jane's episode and the facial hair he was sporting was completely new for him. The dense beard and mustache were sprinkled with silvery gray that he decided to call distinguished rather than go through the hassle of shaving it off. Picking up Jane's teeny tiny scissors he began trimming it into precise neatness.

"Okay," she said, smearing shaving cream on her leg. "If you don't know yet what you do want, tell me what it was that you didn't want anymore."

Brian thought about it before answering. "I guess I didn't like feeling trapped."

Jane stuck her head out of the shower door. "Give me an example of trapped."

He turned to face her, "You know, like when someone tells you what they want for their birthday, so you get it for them, but when they open it, it is exactly what they expected, so there is no surprise. Even though they wanted it, the excitement is less. Whereas if you had picked something for them yourself, you might have gotten a more, organic, response."

Jane nodded understanding and pulled back into the shower. "So you were chaffing because you could predict how certain events were transpiring and you were unhappy with the results. Was this before or after the panic attacks started?"

"Before, I think."

"Was that feeling only happening when it involved work or did it bleed into your personal life too?"

"It was everything. I couldn't escape it."

"How did you deal with that?"

Brian set the scissors down, admiring the new look. He liked the authentic tan on his skin from his hours outside and had to admit the extra pounds he had put on by not restricting his diet added to the muscular bulk he had achieved by working his chores every day and staying active. He was still lean, but he was no longer skinny. His abs were more pronounced and he was pleased about it.

"The usual. Drinking, tricking, drugs."

"What's tricking?"

Brian snorted, "I believe the hetero term is casual sex with strangers, promiscuousness."

"A man-whore?" Jane giggled.

Brian's eyes narrowed, "I prefer the term, free-agent if you don't mind. There will be no slut shaming in our room." he decreed.

Jane laughed, she was well acquainted with Brian's mock annoyance. Then she said, in all seriousness, "But nothing filled that void."

Brian looked himself in the eye in the mirror, admitting it to himself, "No. It didn't."

The shower turned off and Jane wrapped a towel around herself before stepping out. He handed her a second towel to dry her hair and when she was done she took a minute to study his face. She reached out and rubbed her fingers in the silky strands of his beard, "It's soft. Looks good on you too." She gave him a brief peck on the lips. "I like it."

"Don't be mad, I told Mom I was coming to stay with you for Thanksgiving." Molly said as soon as Justin opened the door. It took him a moment to get into the present, his mind had been so focused on getting to Brian.

"What? No. You can't stay, I'm leaving." he told her.

"Leaving? Where are you going? Are you going to look for Brian? I want to come too!"

Justin was shaking his head, "No, Molly, you can't come. I'm not even supposed to be going and if Mom finds out you came too, she's gonna be pissed. Not to mention how livid Brian is going to be when I get there. You don't need to see that. Go home." He packed his phone charger and tossed a spare set of sneakers in the bag.

"Forget it! Mom went with Tucker to his parent's so no one will be home for a week. I don't have school until next Tuesday so you either let me come too, or I'm gonna tell her where you're going."

Molly had braced herself in the doorway, blocking Justin's exit. He knew she would do exactly as threatened, but he was way past the age where their Mother could make him do, or not do, anything. It wasn't like she could ground him anymore. Still, he would rather she didn't know about it and give him a lecture, or worse, let Cynthia or Everett know where he was headed.

Molly knew the moment her brother convinced himself it wasn't worth the hassle and hurried to get out of his way before he changed his mind.

Geri followed Justin and Molly to the Amtrak station, wondering why Justin didn't go to the airport, and Brian's jet, if he was going to head to Pittsburgh for Thanksgiving. When Justin put his car in long term parking, she got a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach and radioed in with her report that Justin and Molly were taking a long trip.

Doing the same with her own car, she kept her distance, as brother and sister went to the ticket counter and she heard Justin request two for Jackson, Mississippi. She maintained her line of sight on them as they moved off and she paid for one as well. Sticking the ticket in her back pocket, she put on her earbuds, and sat behind them in the lobby to wait for their train.

"Tell me again, Honeycutt, why we are going to buy groceries at ten o'clock at night?"

"Because, the holiday is in four days and seeing that it is the only grocery store in these parts it is going to be packed. It will be bad enough this late at night, but if we went during the day or wait any longer, it would take forever. It would be a madhouse." Emmett was explaining as if Brian should already know. "And don't call me Honeycutt."

Lara snickered in the back seat and cracked her window when Brian lit up. "So how come I was elected to help you?" Brian was asking.

"Lulah and Jane were already in bed. You were the one that happened to walk in as I was getting ready to leave. Marc had rounds and Noah was laid up on the couch nursing the knee you rammed into today. We have Lara because Marc wouldn't let you go anywhere without someone toting a gun. Any more questions?"

It was then that Emmett copped onto the mischievous glint in Brian's eye and realized the man was pulling his chain. "Bri-an!"

Lara and Brian were laughing at Emmett's expense when he pulled the truck into the parking lot for the supercenter. It was still over half full and Brian dreaded the maniacal crowds inside.

Brian was secretly grateful Emmett had planned everything out. He had a list broken down into sections of the store so they could get everything they needed in that section without having to back track and skip entire sections altogether since they needed nothing from them. They had all items on the list in the cart in less than an hour and worked their way to the front of the store and the checkout counters.

Unfortunately, that was when their luck gave out. There were only five lanes open out of the twenty-seven available and the lines of people waiting snaked back into the shopping aisles. Emmett picked out a tabloid magazine and settled in for the wait. Brian flipped through a Forbes that had an article about his fundraiser. It was only one page, but it was accompanied by a photo of him and Emmett on stage. Brian snickered and showed it to Emmett who got a good laugh out of it too and teased him. "Hey, we look really hot together, maybe we should take our show on tour." Brian gave him a ‘no fucking way' look and as the line advanced he put the magazine, with the cover still folded back showing the photo, back into its slot on the rack.

Brian felt a tug on his sleeve, "Is that you?" a blonde boy of about nine asked, as he pointed to the picture.

"Yeah, but don't tell anyone. It's a secret." Brian said, tongue in cheek as Emmett went back to his tabloid.

"How come?"

"Because I'm on a secret mission and I don't want my cover blown." Brian was hoping that would get the kid to shut up. Instead, it made his eyes go wide and look around for what Brian supposed would be bad guys, then the kid leaned over and whispered, "My Daddy does that too, but he does it far away."

Brian checked out what he assumed to be the kid's family. The woman in front of them in the line had an infant strapped to her chest and a toddler of about three in the seat of her shopping cart. She had her dark blonde hair pulled back into a greasy ponytail and her sweatpants had seen better days.

The kid was talking again, "We came to get the food for Thanksgiving and get some stuff to send to my Dad. He's a Army Ranger and Momma says we need to send him some socks and stuff cuz he's in a big desert."

"Is that so?"

"Uh huh, Daddy says I'm the man in the house while he's gone and I'ma sposed to take care of Momma and the girls til he gets back from aployment after my birthday in March." The boy had a very serious look on his face.

"Do you mean deployment?" Brian asked, as the line moved forward again.

"Uh huh, I'ma be just like my Dad when I get big. He's tough and smart and my Momma's almost as smart as him. Did you know she goes to school too? When I get big I'm not gonna go to anymore school."

The woman started setting her stuff on the conveyer and called the boy's name to get him to help, leaving Brian staring at the toddler. His first thought was, what on earth would possess someone to drag three kids to the store that late at night. Thinking about the conversation with the boy, about his mom going to school and Emmett's earlier comment about how busy the store would be during the next few days, had him assuming this was the best time she could fit it into her schedule. She put a small turkey, potatoes, corn, milk, bread, formula, diapers, wipes, men's toiletries, and a package of socks on the belt. As the cashier started scanning the items, Emmett filled the empty space with things from their cart, crossing the items off his list as he went.

"I'm sorry Ma'am, your card was declined, do you have another you would like me to try?" Brian watched the woman swipe the card again and when it was declined for a second time, the person behind Emmett started to get rude under his breath.

Brian saw the woman survey her items, obviously trying to decide what she could live without as the baby on her chest sensed her distress and woke up with a wail. She instinctively started rocking as she reached for the men's items intending to take them off her bill, embarrassment making tears well up in her eyes.

If not me, then who?

Jane's voice played over and over in Brian's head until he pulled out his wallet and handed the cashier his bank card. "Use this."

"No, sir, really I can't take your money." The young mother tried to stop it, but the cashier had already swiped it in an attempt to hurry her along.

"It's no trouble. Really." Brian hoped she wouldn't make a scene and he was saved from it by the baby's wail and the receipt printing out. She nodded in thanks, unable to speak and pushed her cart toward the doors while the little towhead kept stealing glances back at him.

Brian turned to Emmett and grabbed the money envelope and pen from his hand. He extracted five hundred dollars, shoved it at Emmett and walked off after the family, sticking the envelope in his pocket. He caught up with them as she was trying to load the groceries in the trunk. He didn't say anything, he just opened the back door and picked the toddler up from the cart and put her in the pink car seat.

Coming to the back, the little boy was trying to convince his mom that he could return the empty cart to the corral, but she was having none of it. The parking lot was too busy.

Brian rubbed his knuckle across his forehead, "I'll walk with him."

She gave him a dubious look and Brian chuckled, "Yeah, I get it. But it's just right there, and you can get the baby in the car and we will be right back. Here, you can hold my wallet as insurance."

She took the wallet and set it on top of the car, while she bent to put the baby in the infant seat. The second her back was turned, Brian got the little boys attention, and said, "I have a mission for you. You have to sneak this envelope into your house and put it under your Dad's pillow tonight."

"How come it says ‘thanks for serving' on it?"

Brian was running out of time and tucked the folded envelope into the boy's pocket. "Your Mom will understand. Can you do the mission?" When he nodded vigorously Brian said "Good Boy." walked him back to the car and retrieved his wallet.

He moved away as she backed out of her space and wrote down her license plate number on his palm. Emmett and Lara pulled up next to him and he climbed into the front seat. "Follow that car." he said, adding "at a distance. I don't want to scare her."

Less than four blocks later the little car pulled into the driveway of a tiny house and Emmett drove past it to turn around at the corner and come back. Brian directed him to park at the curb and turn the truck off. He dialed his phone as they watched the woman take the toddler out of the car seat and sit her next to the boy by the front door of the house as she made several trips to get the groceries to the door.

"Hey, I need you to find out who owns the car with this license." Brian read the numbers from his palm.

"Of course I know what time it is. Why, you have someone in your bed?"

The woman then took all of the kids inside and she made several more trips getting the groceries from the door to the inside of the house.

"Well it's about time. See if there is a mortgage on this address," Brian gave it to her, "if there is, pay it off. Call down here to one of the dealerships and purchase a mini-van and put the homeowner's name on the title, have them deliver it as soon as possible. No I'm not drunk. Also I want you to set up a college fund for the entire family, start it with a hundred thousand. Find a house somewhere around here that has at least four bedrooms and two bathrooms and purchase it in her name. Make sure it has a yard. Yeah, I will. Okay! Okay, I said I would, didn't I? Sure thing. Turn around and tell Everett I said I knew he could do it. Later."

Brian hung up his phone and indicated that Emmett could go back to driving, then said, "Not one word out of either of you."

Geri found a seat two rows behind and across the aisle from her charges. Settling in, she put in her earbuds and listened to some music as she worked a crossword puzzle left on the seat by its previous inhabitant.

"So why are we looking for Brian now? Hasn't he been gone, like, almost a month?"

Justin fished through his bag for a pack of gum he knew he had thrown in there. "He has been gone for a while. But I need to see him right away. Something is wrong, I know it."

Molly took a piece when he offered her the pack. "Like what? I would think someone would tell you if it was serious."

"I don't know if it is that serious, but he's acting all kinds of weird." Justin dropped the bag to the floor between his feet and slouched into the seat.

"Uh, maybe you've never noticed, but Brian has always been a little weird." Molly said it as if Justin was an idiot.

"No. No." Justin was shaking his head, "eccentric, strange, and occasionally nerdy, but not weird. Molly, he used an emoticon in an email to me. He hates it when I use them. And I'll tell you another thing, he's all wrapped up in some woman!"

Molly's eyes were round with shock, "He's having an affair with a woman?"

"I don't know, but he said he cared about her and sent me a bunch of pictures and stuff with her in it."

Molly's eyes opened bigger, rounder, "Like naked pictures?!"

Justin pulled out his laptop and showed his sister his evidence. After she had watched both the slideshow and the videos twice she said, "That is totally fucking awesome, I would sooo buy that, even if it was a comic book!"

Justin was exasperated that Molly wasn't seeing what he wanted her to see, "You're not helping, Mol!"

Two days later everyone at the lodge was working especially hard. A truck load of hay bales had been dropped in front of the barn, the vegetable garden needed to be harvested and tilled over, and Emmett and Lulah wanted to get started on cooking for the holiday the following day.

They had divvied up the chores at breakfast, Brian insisting he would work the bales into the barn. He gave the excuse of needing the exercise, but most of them figured out it was because he didn't want to do anything girly, like gardening or cooking. He had already done his fair share of those things this week and was ready for something a bit more strenuous. Lara, Marc and Jane shared a silent communication over his ability to handle that much work, with Jane winning the argument, indicating she would keep an eye on him and let them know if he needed help.

By early afternoon the temperature was only sixty-three degrees, but Jane and Brian were both sweating. Brian removed his shirt and handed her the bandana from his pocket he had been using, asking her to tie it around his head to keep the perspiration and hair from his eyes. Conversation was minimal, given the effort of the work, and as the corner of the barn filled, it was taking longer for each bale to be loaded because the person carrying it had to climb the already stacked bales to get the current bale on top.

Jane could see he was getting tired but kept her mouth shut, knowing he would just get stubborn and refuse to quit. She started timing her pace with his, so she was climbing the stacks directly behind him should he falter.

They were at the top of the stacks, having both just set their bales in place, when they turned at the same time and her fingertips brushed his ribcage. A small grunting snort escaped him as he squirmed away, and started his decent.

Jane's face lit with devilment.

She followed him out for another bale, but instead of picking one for herself, she waited until he disappeared into the barn, then pressed up against the wall by the door waiting for his return. She caught Lara's eye, waving her over, indicating that Brian was done for the day and just as she and the other men were headed their direction, Brian emerged.

Jane pounced him from behind, wrapping an arm around his waist and using her free hand to tickle his ribs. Brian let out a surprised, barking laugh, and would have hit the ground had Jane not stuck her fingers in his belt loops to keep him upright. He tried twisting to get away, but she had plastered herself to his back and her tickling fingers kept him from being able to draw a full breath as he laughed and squirmed, Jane's merriment floating in the air.

Marc, Noah, and Lara made quick work of the remaining bales while Brian was distracted. By the time the last one was loaded, Jane had wrestled Brian onto his back on the ground as she straddled his hips, digging into his ribs with both hands and was demanding he say "Uncle" at the top of her lungs. Brian gave in disappointingly early and when Jane stood up and offered her hand to help him up, he took it, making a great show of dusting off his backside.

He made a move, intending to go back to work, and seeing it already finished with the agents watching their antics, he knew she had done it on purpose to get him to take a break. His eyes narrowed as he slowly turned back to Jane...

Kinnetik was closed for the holiday but Everett and Cynthia were in his command station. Cynthia had finished up the work on her desk and met up with him as he sat poring over video. He had managed to use his connections to obtain the security feeds for some of the stores around the area Brian had been walking when he was stabbed and had been going through them when she walked in.

"All done up there?" he asked, holding out his hand and pulling her into his lap.

"For now. What are your plans for tomorrow?"

Everett stopped watching the monitors, turned his head to face her. "I don't have any. Lara is with Brian and I don't have any other family, so it's just you and me, if you want."

Cynthia nodded, "Sounds good. My place?"

"Sure." he said, leaning forward and picking up a stack of papers. "Just need to finish going over the daily reports, then we can go if you want. I'm not making much progress on the feeds."

She stood, "I'll go get my things and meet you at the door."

Everett nodded agreement, giving his attention to the papers in his hand. He made some notes on a few, flipping them into a different pile and stopped dead as he read the next report.

Dialing his phone, he snatched his pea coat from the hook, and took off down the corridor.

"Geri, Everett."

Cynthia was standing by the employee door checking her voicemail when she heard the haste in his voice coming from down the hall where she couldn't see him.

"I just read your report. Where in Mississippi are you?"

Cynthia's gut knotted.

"I know what your orders were, I gave them to you!"

Dropping her phone into her purse as he approached she asked, "Brian?"

Everett's head jerked in assent as he continued talking into his cell, "For right now, just follow, I'll give Marc's team the heads up. With any luck, he won't find it and will give up looking. Call me directly, keep me posted."

Cynthia and Everett left the building, locking it behind them, and got into Cynthia's Audi. She started the car and listened as Everett tried to get a hold Marc.

Geri followed the sibling's rental from a safe distance as they made another turn and circled back the way they had come. So far they had made the maneuver four times and were now parked on the shoulder of the road. Apparently, whatever sign or turn they were looking for had yet to make an appearance.

"I'm telling you for the fourth time, that is the turn!" Molly was aggravated, thrusting her hand in the direction of the dirt road that led off from the pavement across from where Justin had parked the car.

Justin snatched the GPS unit from her hand and zoomed the out the image on its display. "But this is a National Park? What the fuck would he be doing here?"

"Who cares? We've been travelling for two days and I'm tired and hungry. Take the damn turn and see where it goes."

Justin was still shaking his head when Molly tried for logic. "Look, it will either lead you to Brian or it won't. If it doesn't, then we might still have a chance to make it back to Jackson before it gets dark and maybe score a hotel room. Hopefully they won't all be full for Thanksgiving tomorrow, or did you forget that every town has been closed up since we left there?"

Justin put on his turn signal, checked the mirrors and crossed the highway for the dirt lane.

Geri made the call.

Cynthia pulled into the hectic traffic as Everett's phone signaled an incoming before his call connected with Marc.

"Everett." he said, answering.

"Shit."

"No, I haven't yet."

"Nothing for it at this point. Fall back to Jackson."

Everett ended the call, hit speed dial for Marc.

Jane saw the glimmer of retribution in his expressive hazel eyes the minute he turned around. He knew what she had done and he was determined to make her pay for it as a broad grin split his face and he launched himself at her.

She dodged out of the way, barely escaping his grasping hand and took off running across the grass, screaming and laughing, Brian hot on her heels. She paid no attention as Emmett came onto the porch with Marc's ringing phone in his hand. She snaked around him as he walked to the porch to retrieve it, keeping the big man between her and Brian, taunting and teasing him unmercifully.

When Marc reached the porch, Jane streaked off to garden, Brian shadowing her move, where she picked up the nozzle end of the water hose and doused him head to foot. The shock that she actually had the balls to do it, had Brian momentarily frozen in place, flushing red in annoyance, giving Jane the opening to dash around him in a wide arc and race back towards the barn, Bear running around her legs in joyful amusement.

Brian caught up with her, almost where it had all started, darting out a hand and grabbing the back of her waistband, planting his feet and tugging her back, their momentum toppling them to a heap on the ground.

Brian was the quicker of the two, slinging a leg over hers to pin them down and straddling her like she had him, digging his tickling fingers into her side while she laughed.

Jane tried bucking him off, squirming to get away, managing to free one leg. Brian saw his opening and shifted to drop his hips and legs between hers and used his superior weight to pin her to the ground with his chest.

Jane was trapped under him, squealing and laughing, gasping for air and screaming "Uncle". Brian was laughing too, but pushed for a bit of punishment by burying his face in the crook of her neck and blowing raspberries on her skin making her squeal louder.

Jane was screaming for him to stop, his beard was too much, and he switched to tickling her face with it while Bear tried to worm his way in by licking her to death, tail wagging crazily, inciting Brian to switch tactics and lick her face like a big dorky dog while her legs kicked in the air above his back, yelling for him to stop before she peed her pants.

The next events happened almost simultaneously.

Bear took off running and barking at the car pulling in, Marc said, "Forget it, he's already here.", punching a finger on his phone to end the call and Jane went completely still under him, her head turned toward the road.

It wasn't until she pushed on his shoulder and he heard Justin say his name that he became aware of the silence around him. He wished fervently in is head that Justin's voice had been a figment of his imagination. Looking first at Jane as she rolled her head back to him, he saw that it was not his mind playing tricks on him when her eyes went soft in concern. He touched his forehead to hers and dragged in a breath, let it out, and briefly kissed her lips to let her know he was okay.

He thought it might have been Emmett that let out a whispered "oh, shit" from the porch but ignored it as he pushed back to kneeling and rolled to his feet, holding out his hand to help Jane stand up. She squeezed it gently, to tell him she would be there if he needed her, before letting his hand drop and walking to stand by Noah, who put his arm around her waist, and pulled her into his side.

Justin hadn't missed a single second of the entire exchange and hurt blazed in his chest and shone from his eyes when Brian finally turned to face him.

"Brian?"

Brian knew what the question was. From Justin's viewpoint, what had been a playful interlude, looked at best, to be something between lover's and at worst, Brian all but fucking Jane in the yard in full view of anyone caring to watch.

Molly's wide eyed shock easily conveyed what she thought she had seen, making Brian decide to purposely not look at Justin's face as he marched across the distance between them, curled his fingers into the younger man's shirt and hauled him into the house and up the steps behind him.

A hundred thoughts raced through Brian's head as he dragged Justin up the steps, not the least of which was how the hell the younger man had found him.

A thousand thoughts raced through Justin's head as he was dragged up the steps, not the least of which was, who the fuck was the bearded pod person wearing Brian's jeans and making out with a woman on the front lawn?

All thoughts left both heads when Brian pulled Justin into the bedroom and kicked the door shut after them.

There was so much he wanted to say, to tell him, nothing fell from his lips but a painful breath of longing when sapphire eyes met his own. His heart contracted sharply, his vision narrowed, could hear nothing but his own ragged breathing as his brain fought for control of his body.

"Sofuckingbeautiful." It tumbled out before he could stop it, didn't want to admit to the thought, so crashed his lips to Justin's before he could respond, and tangled his fingers in blonde hair.

Brian walked him backwards until they hit the bed, plundering Justin's mouth with his tongue, delving into its depths with swift abandon. Justin's mewl of pleasure vibrated into Brian's mouth, seared a path to his gut and ignited a fire in his groin. The blonde was already toeing off his shoes, hands hastily running over sun warmed skin, tongue dueling for its fair share.

"Off...mmm...clothes...ahhh...now..." Brian got out between panting breaths.

Justin pulled the tee from his body, angry at the brief loss of Brian's mouth, greedily latching back on when he was free.

He knelt to help Brian get out of his work boots and was subsequently almost slapped in the face with Brian's fully engorged cock when he released it from the confines of his wet jeans, already dripping precum. Justin's eyes went round and he licked his lips as it fell in a long, sticky, wet line halfway to the floor before breaking off. He had always loved Brian's cock, but he had never seen it so big or dark. Brian's heartbeat could be seen throbbing in the big vein on the underside and more fluid leaked from his slit every time it pulsed. Justin opened his lips to take it into his mouth, but the hand in his hair stopped him.

Brian gave him a short, negative, head shake and Justin knew Brian didn't want to wait.

"Where?"

Brian pointed at the night stand on the other side of the bed. Justin shucked his pants and lay on his belly across the bed, reaching an outstretched hand into the drawer, giving Brian an unrestricted view of his perfectly round bubble butt. He sniggered as his hand grabbed the box of condoms and Brian let out a guttural moan. He felt the bed dip as Brian kneeled between his already splayed legs and he peeked over his shoulder to watch as his lover squeezed and released the base of his dick, letting the pre cum decorate his ass.

Brian ran his palm over his cockhead a few times, filling it with jizz, and wormed it past Justin's balls until he cradled the long, dark pink shaft, trapping it between his belly and Brian's hand on the mattress. Justin sighed his pleasure.

Brian stuck his face in the deep crease of Justin's backside, turning his head back and forth until he reached his goal and inhaled the scent that was only his, laving his tongue over the pucker and nipping at the flesh around it. Justin was already grinding into his hand, so he wrapped his fingers tighter, eliciting a groan of approval from his mate.

Brian pointed his tongue and drove it into the tight ring of muscle just as Justin was thrusting into his hand making Justin grip the edge of the bed. Brian watched the muscles play under pale skin on Justin's back as he continued rimming him, his beard teasing Justin's perineum and ball sack as he brought his lover to orgasm, Justin's cum soaking Brian's hand, his own belly and the duvet. Brian dragged his hand back, smearing cum over Justin's sack and using it as a lubricant to ease his middle and ring finger past the dark ring of his partner's sphincter and into the hot channel, diving straight for the prostate where he curled and pressed, curled and pressed, his fingers until Justin was pushing back on his hand, panting, unable to form words, braced on his knees, begging Brian to fuck him.

It was music to Brian's ears. He freed his hand, Justin moaning at the loss, opened a condom and rolled it on. Justin twisted so he could see Brian's eyes go hyper-focused as he aligned his cock and watched as it sank into his eager hole. Brian's abs tensed as Justin's tightness engulfed him and Brian had to fight back the urge to cum.

Justin could feel Brian's pulse throbbing in his shaft as it slowly retreated, leaving just the tip, and slammed back in, stabbing his prostate. Justin's cock was hard again by the time Brian eased out and slammed in again. He continued the tortuous pace until Justin was leaking and fisting his cock, unintelligible words falling out of him, urging Brian to move quicker, harder.

He didn't disappoint. He dug his fingers into Justin's hip, pulling him back onto every thrust, faster and faster until their balls were slapping each other and sounds of sweaty flesh meeting filled the room to hover over the gasps, grunts, and moans of hurried fucking. Brian's yell of triumph as his orgasm hit had Justin following a moment later.

Jane hid her face in Dandy's mane, willing the churning in her stomach to go away. Justin's untimely arrival left her feeling dirty and bereft. Brian's response had been exactly as she thought it would be and she hoped she had imparted enough skills for him to handle it without her, should he have a meltdown.

Right now, she didn't want to be around anyone. Needed the freedom of flight her rides on Dandy allowed her.

"You let your episode happen, didn't you?"

It was Lara, standing outside the stall.

Jane grabbed Dandy's tack from the peg and moved to put it on him, so Lara couldn't see her face. "Yes."

"Non-specific acute anemia, chronic high anxiety, and I'm taking a stab in the dark with borderline diabetes."

"Your point?" Jane asked, as she slipped the bridle over the horse's big head.

Lara sounded concerned when she replied, "You could have prevented it. I saw your pills and vitamins. Did you do it on purpose?"

"No." she laid her foot harness over his back and he danced sideways, wanting to run.

"This is the first time the two of you haven't been joined at the hip since you got here, and I've been waiting to discuss it with you in private. I'm the medic of this outfit, I need to know if something like that is going to happen again."

"It won't."

"So you did do it on purpose. Why?"

Jane finally faced her, fury making her face flush and hands shake. "Extreme temperature changes aggravate the anemia and can cause severe muscle cramping/seizing. The day I drove down here my rental car was broken, remember? I knew then an attack was a possibility and when Brian exhibited prolific protective and caregiving responses when we were talking later I decided not to take my medication in the hopes that when I had the attack he would recognize my trauma and trust himself to relive his own experiences. By giving him myself as an external way for admission of his own violation, it forced him to open up to me. What could have potentially taken weeks to admit, was accomplished in substantially less time. I could have told him about it, but Brian doesn't trust words. He trusts what his eyes show him and his emotional responses. For lack of a better term, he trusts his instincts."

"So it was all an act?" Lara's confusion was barely overridden by betrayal.

Jane was pissed, biting out each word. "If you think for one second, being trapped in your own head, reliving every moment of excruciating pain you ever had, pain so bad it dwarfs the pain your body is currently going through, unable to communicate or control anything about yourself, is an act, then there is nothing I can say to change your mind."

"So you let it happen. For him?" Lara asked.

Jane nodded once, succinctly, leading Dandy to the hay bales she used to mount him.

"You could have been really hurt, needed hospitalization?"

"Yes."

"Jane?"

She climbed onto Dandy's back, glaring at Lara. "It's my body and I won't apologize for doing anything I can to help him." she said, then kicked the horse's side and bolted out the door.

Brian knew what he wanted, had been dreaming about it off and on for days. Pulling out of Justin, he sat back on his heels and removed the filled condom from his still half hard cock and slung it towards the wastebasket.

As satisfying as their fuck had been for taking the edge off, it still hadn't reached the right chord Brian needed for full satiation. He touched Justin's thigh, indicating he wanted him to turn over onto his back. When he complied, Brian immediately placed himself between his partner's legs and buried his nose in blonde pubes, drawing the scents of sex and Justin into his starved lungs.

He pulled Justin's left leg over his shoulder and wrapped his arm under the thigh, then back over to grasp the big pink cock. Brian stroked it, base to tip and back again, licking at the head and tasting Justin's cum, savoring it, before taking the entire length into his mouth.

"Brian, I don't think I can..." Justin was trying to say.

"Shut up." Brian spoke around the dick in his mouth.

He pushed his body forward, bringing Justin's knee higher, baring his partner's pucker. Justin was getting harder. Brian hollowed his cheeks, using lips and tongue to his best advantage and pulled his hand back under him to play with Justin's hole, teasing it before slipping his thumb inside, purposely letting the knuckle catch each time he pushed it in and dragged it out.

Brian bobbed his head several times, taking Justin all the way into his throat, working him to a full erection. When Justin was writhing under him, fingers digging into Brian's scalp urging him to hurry, Brian pulled away, opened a condom and put it on Justin's dick, making him purr in shocked surprise.

Brian didn't give him any time to think about it or say anything, he just crawled up the pale body, planting light kisses as he went until he got to Justin's mouth where he took his time. Slowly licking his way in, long languorous swipes, communicating his need. When Justin reciprocated in understanding, Brian moved around until he was facing away and straddling Justin's cock.

Taking it in his hand, he lined it up with his entrance and slid down a fraction. He knew it was going to burn, relished it even as he breathed through it, his muscles contracting around the intrusion. Each time the contracting eased, he would push down a little further, breathe through it and do it again until he was fully seated, Justin's cock swallowed by his ass.

Brian rose up, almost to the tip and sank down in one fluid motion, moaning at the stretch of Justin's girth combined with the pressure on his prostate. Brian's head fell back, as he set a languid pace, tugging on Justin's roaming hand and pulling him up behind him, back to chest. Brian moved his lover's hand over his torso, showing him how he wanted to be touched and when both pale hands played over his skin, Brian gave himself up to the sensations.

Justin let his hands go where they willed as he nuzzled and kissed whatever he could reach. Brian's skin tasted warm and salty and smelled like only he could smell. An aphrodisiac on its own and twice as heady given it was his dick in Brian's ass.

Justin's hand moved to Brian's exposed neck as he tipped his head back in bliss. The purring hums he was making deep in his chest were felt all the way up Justin's arm. The sounds never failed to turn him on and drive him crazy with need.

Brian's pace quickened incrementally, soaking in the attention of Justin's hands and kisses. The chord was being strummed. The feeling of connection intense and overpowering, driving out the fear and anxiety, leaving behind only the wonder that someone could love him. Brian's eyes closed, hyper-focused on those feelings of contentment and the soft yellow haze covering his mind's eye.

"Sunshine..." he croaked.

Justin reached down, took Brian's steel hard shaft in his hand and matched his strokes to Brian's pace on his cock. Brian shivered with the new sensation, running his palm over Justin's forearm, encouraging him for getting it just right.

Justin didn't know how much more he could take, he was so close, and tried to say so.

"Bri...an..."

Hearing his name from those lips sent him over the edge of oblivion, his cum shooting into Justin's hand and his ass clenching around Justin's dick pulling the younger man over the edge with him.