Title: It’s Not Good Bye ~ I’ll Be Right Here Rememberin’ When… 
Story Type: AU 
Word Count: 609
Rating: NC17…
Warnings: Angst. Passion…
Beta Queen: BigJ52

Summary: Brian’s thoughts inter-dispersed with the lyrics of ‘It’s not Good Bye’.

‘It’s Not Good Bye… ~ 
I’ll Be Right Here Rememberin’ When’ 

And what if I never kiss your lips again 
Or feel the touch of your sweet embrace 
How would I ever go on 
Without you there's no place to belong 

It’s been so long now that I can barely remember the feel of your lips brushing mine or the way you hold me from behind… 

I wander these lonely streets at night, unable to keep up the fight. Can’t even find my way home, there’s no place now that I belong…

Well someday love is gonna lead you back to me 
But 'til it does I'll have an empty heart 
So I'll just have to believe 
Somewhere out there you thinking of me

I lie here passed out on the floor, wondering if you’ll ever grace my door. 

Lying here totally numb, wondering how I can be so dumb, opening my heart to someone. So I wait, and wait but you don’t come.

Until the day I'll let you go 
Until we say our next hello 
It's not goodbye 
'Til I see you again 
I'll be right here rememberin' when 
And if time is on our side 
There will be no tears to cry 
On down the road 
There is one thing I can't deny 
It's not goodbye

I set you free, hoping you’d find your way back to me. My love for you will always grow, that’s something I thought you’d always know… 

But now I can see, that the best that can be, is that someday you'll remember me… So I hide my tears and pray, wishing that you’ll return someday.

You'd think I'd be strong enough to make it through 
And rise above when the rain falls down 
But it's so hard to be strong 
When you've been missin' somebody so long 

Just when I was ready to let you in, you slipped away and ran off with him.

I walk through the rain hiding my shame, finally acknowledging all your pain. Knowing that I’m to blame. Why did I cause you so much pain? 

It's just a matter of time I'm sure 
But time takes time and I can't hold on 
So won't you try as hard as you can 
To put my broken heart together again

I always thought that we’d see each other again, holding on to the bitter end. Now I wait with an empty heart, wondering if you ever think of me in the dark.

There’s no need to hold on anymore. If I’m really honest I’ve always known the score. So I let go again, wondering if I’ll ever be whole again…

Until the day I'll let you go 
Until we say our next hello 
It's not goodbye 
'Til I see you again 
I'll be right here rememberin' when 
And if time is on our side 
There will be no tears to cry 
On down the road 
There is one thing I can't deny 
It's not goodbye

So I lie alone in the night, feeling you there just of out sight. Trying to forget with all my might what finally made you leave that last night.

It never had to be this way, if only I asked you to stay. But I let you walk away, knowing there’d be hell to pay…

Brian’s thoughts were inspired by the song It’s not Good Bye ~ Laura Pausini

To me as I listened to this song, watching the video I couldn’t help thinking that she wrote this song as a response to the final episode of Queer as Folk. 

I hope you enjoy the video ~ Kathleen

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i53OxSLA5UE&feature=related