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Author's Chapter Notes:

This chapter is more touching than hot - very important plot points involved though. You might want to start taking notes. TAG

 

Upon opening his eyes, Justin was greeted by the glorious autumn sunlight beaming through the large loft windows and a sublime ache radiating out from his tender ass. He knew he’d be walking funny and sporting a shit-eating grin for the rest of the day, and he loved it! He felt relaxed, sated, and decidedly lazy that morning and was grateful he had plenty of time to laze in bed before he needed to be anywhere. He let his mind drift over the delicious events of the previous day, amazed at (and a little proud of) the depravity and wantonness that was so unlike his normal self.

When he arrived at the memories of his brief mailbox exchange with Brian, Justin felt the blood rising to his cheeks as his embarrassment over his last short note hit him full force. How would Brian react to his blunt declaration of love? It was the truth – he had fallen irrevocably for the man, but he knew if he’d been in his right mind he never would have voiced his feelings so directly. He could probably plead temporary insanity, though, and hopefully Brian would let him off easy.

That’s when the memory of Brian’s own declaration (of sorts) hit him. He immediately bolted out of bed, pulled on the first clothes he found and ran towards the door, grabbing a pad of paper and pen as he went. He made it down to the lobby in record time, spent thirty seconds furiously scratching out a note, unceremoniously tossed it in the box and then sat down to wait and see if he’d get a reply from Brian.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Brian noticed the note in the mailbox right away. He’d been half expecting to hear from his young protégé that morning. He’d been rather proud of how well his little present for the boy had turned out. He couldn’t wait to get more of the naughty details from Justin and hear all about the experience. Therefore, it was with heightened anticipation that he opened the boy’s note.

-You’re a Dad? How? This is so HUGE. I’m sorry my needy little ass eclipsed your big news last night. Please tell me. I want to hear everything. Justin.

It wasn’t exactly what he’d been expecting but Brian was equally as proud of his brand new son as he was of his sweet young lover. Therefore, he happily seated himself on the chair in the corner and proceeded to pen a full explanation for Justin.

-Remember my friend Lindz from college? I told you about her, didn’t I? Well, she and her partner, Melanie, decided they wanted to have a baby. I’m not sure how, exactly, but they managed to talk me into becoming the sperm donor. It must have been all that flattery and Lindz going on about what great genes I have (and she wasn’t just talking about my 501s either). So, I jerked off into a cup, they squirted it up her, and here we all are nine months later with a kid. Fuck! When the fuck did I get old enough to have a kid? (No age jokes – I’m warning you – you will pay!) Whatever.

So Sunday night, after I delivered your little present, the guys dragged me out to Woody’s and Babylon for a night of Kinney-style debauchery – poor boys, without me they’d really have no social lives at all. Anyway, it must have been about 2:00 am when we were leaving the club and my cell started to ring. It was Mel, of course, telling me to get my ass over to the hospital . . .

The letter went on and on. Justin was glad he’d waited around for an answer – he hadn’t been sure Brian would get his note before leaving for work, but he didn’t have anywhere to be for awhile so he’d just curled up on his cushion and doodled. It was more than a half hour later when the response finally popped into the box, accompanied by the now familiar ‘clank’.

Brian sounded so happy in the letter. Justin could feel the man’s excitement, his amazement and his sheer unexpected joy at the birth of this tiny, helpless copy of himself. There was also a hefty amount of fear coming through, along with just a hint of longing.

In spite of all Brian’s bragging over his various conquests and his brash assertions that he had no interest in relationships, it had long been clear to the perceptive young man that this outwardly self-confident man was inherently lonely. The few hints Brian had let slip about his childhood told Justin that Brian hadn’t had the proto-typical 'Leave it to Beaver' upbringing. Maybe becoming a father in his own right would help heal some of those old scars and ease his loneliness? Justin desperately hoped so, because in his opinion, it was patently unfair that such a caring, loving, and beautiful man should be so alone.

The two men spent a long time chatting all about Gus, discussing Brian’s plans to see the baby and even mapping out the child’s future college and employment prospects. The proud papa was thrilled to pull out his very own baby pictures to show Justin (but, heaven help anyone who tried to compare him to any doting, hetero, photo-toting parents or grandparents). And he excitedly passed through to Justin a copy of the first picture taken of him and Gus together. It had been taken at the hospital that first night - it showed Brian holding a bundle of baby boy and smiling at the camera with such love and sheer bliss that it brought tears to Justin’s eyes. Justin yearned to be there with Brian to share in and celebrate this momentous event, but unless he could figure out a way to fit himself into the mailbox, there seemed to be no way.

Brian advised that he was taking most of the day off to visit with Lindz and the baby and to help Mel bring the mother and newborn home. He was eager to get back to the hospital to see his son. So he reluctantly signed off with Justin.

-Later. Brian.

Even after Brian had gone, Justin remained, nestled on his cushion. He spent another hour just sitting there, dreaming about Brian and a baby, and sketching the image from the hospital photo.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

(September 7, 1999 – 4:00 pm)

Lindsey was ensconced in a corner of the slightly worn navy couch, resting her head against the plush beige cushion propped against the arm. The curtains were drawn in order to keep the room dim in the hope that this would help keep the baby asleep. It had been a stressful couple of days, and was not likely to get any less hectic for some time to come, and the new mother was enjoying this brief respite while ‘Dad’ held the object of all this attention.

Lindsey smiled at the endearing sight before her. Brian had been sitting in the large, over-stuffed, dark blue armchair across from her, staring raptly at the peacefully sleeping baby in his lap for more than fifteen minutes. This larger-than-life man had apparently been brought down to Earth by a wrinkled, pink, slightly smelly, bundle of needy baby boy. The exceedingly tender look on the man’s usually disdainful face was so telling, Lindsey thought to herself. She had always known that this caring, sentimental man was hidden deep within her friend – she also knew that he rarely let this side of himself show. Her conviction that Brian would be a great father was confirmed once again by the sight sitting here in her living room.

The peaceful scene was abruptly disturbed by a shrill ringing pealing out from the hallway phone extension. Mel galloped down the stairs at full tilt, trying in vain to reach the noisy contraption before it woke the baby. Gus’ sense of hearing, though, was acute, and he startled awake at the very first ring. Brian, now holding a squirming, wailing, red-faced imp instead of the peaceful angel he’d been admiring before, sat staring, at a complete loss as to how to handle this distressing change. Lindsey chortled at the shell-shocked expression on the man’s countenance but, taking pity on him, she reached out to gather up the crying infant and provide the necessary comforting touch.

“Thanks. They’re both doing great. Yeah. I’ll tell her. Bye,”  Mel’s voice drifted in from the hall, followed by the woman herself.

“Sorry, Linds. I need to remember to turn the ringers off when the baby’s sleeping. That was Eleanor from the Center. She wanted to remind you about the meeting on Friday about the art show. I’m relaying the message, but I really don’t know if you should go. You should probabbly not push it too much. At least for awhile. Can’t someone else take over the show for you,” Mel asked with obvious concern for her lover clearly evident in her tone.

“I’ll be fine, Mel. I had a baby – it’s not like I’m recovering from the plague or something. I don’t plan to stay tied to the house until Gus turns eighteen and moves out. A short outing and a little fresh air will do both of us some good. Besides, I’m excited about the show. And, after all the work I’ve put into it already, there’s no way I’m gonna turn it over to someone else now,” was Lindsey’s confident reply.

Now that the baby had been soothed and the crying had ceased, Lindsey turned back to Brian and laid the blinking child back in his father’s arms. Brian again found himself staring at the tiny face of the infant and discovered to his surprise that watching a baby sucking on it’s pacifier was actually fascinating. ‘Shit, I must have been spending too much time hanging out with dykes – I’m turning into a total lesbian,’ Brian couldn't help thinking. His fear of all things lesbian, however, wasn’t strong enough to prevent the man from continuing to admire his beautiful son.

“You ARE going to come to the show, Brian, aren’t you,” Lindsey asked.

“Why the fuck would I do that?” responded Brian, his indifferent persona firmly back in place.

“Because it’s for a good cause – the money we raise will go towards the Center’s child care program, which is where you son will probably be going once I go back to work. It’s to your benefit that this show is a success. Plus, it wouldn’t kill you to show me a little support either, now would it?" Lindsey put on her most winsome smile. 

The Kinney inscrutability had never been able to withstand a full-on Peterson assault; as soon as she saw the first sign of softening in Brian’s eyes, she knew she’d won and that he would be at her show.

“Besides, I think you’ll be surprised at how great some of the art work is. We’ve got some amazing young artists this year. You do work in an art-related field, so I’d think you’d be interested in seeing what these emerging artists are capable of. Who knows, you might be hiring one of them some day.”

“Fine. When is this extravaganza, anyway? I’ll have to make sure my cocktail dress is back from the cleaners in time,” joked the brunet with a falsetto voice and his tongue firmly planted in his cheek.

 

 

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