LINDSAY’S POV

We sat in that class tonight and thought we were in the wrong room. The parents in the room ranged from neglect to abuse.  We had to get up and explain why we were there. As the class progressed, I started hearing the behavior kids of abuse exhibit. I then realized although we don’t hurt the kids physically, mentally we do.

I thought back to when we start to argue, both kids seem to disappear into thin air. I remember after a fight, going by Gus’s room and hearing him tell JR that everything is okay. I know we don’t mean for them to get hurt, we don’t even fight about them. I wonder if that is what the guy who put his kid in the hospital was thinking.

MEL’S POV

Usually I am the lawyer you meet when family disputes happen. Now I am the lawyer causing the disputes. I have always thought that I was better than this. Listen to the stories and telling myself that we didn’t do the things the people here did, doesn’t make for a strong argument.

I don’t think our situation is as bad as some of them but just because we don’t touch Gus and JR doesn’t mean we didn’t hurt them. Coming here I thought it was going to be like what you read in books. Nope they give you color visuals.

When we left, Lindsay started talking.

“We need to make a lot of decisions. We can’t let our kids grow up and think what we have be doing is normal. Mel, when we first went in there I thought ‘why are we here?’. I mean, we fight with each other. The things they said about behavior, I see that at home. The kids know when we are going to fight, and they hide.” Lindsay is really upset about it.

“I think that Gus calls and gets people to call us to stop the fighting too.” Lindsay looked at me when I said that.

“You mean Justin and Ben calling.” She asks me.

I tell her to think about it. We fight and suddenly some is calling. What about when Justin showed up after Michael found out.

“I mean he invited you to help him, but he didn’t really ask for any advice.” I tell her.

We found out that Brian was with them when Justin took them to Disney and to Sea World. Brian and Justin dropped off the kids together. Lindsay wanted Brian to stay the night so they could talk. Brian told her that they had to go. She was upset that he couldn’t postpone for one day to spend time with her.

We didn’t fight that night. We also didn’t talk to each other.

BRIAN’S POV

They drank, they ate and were merry, now I need them to be merry at their own homes. It was going on 9 and the kids were flagging. Jen helped out, she started suggesting everyone go home.

Jen and I worked out that we could be friends, after she understood that Justin was going to live his own life and if she wanted to be part of it, she had to deal with me. When we broke up before the bombing, she was actually upset about it. When I told her Justin said no to marriage, she wanted to talk some sense into him.

The New York adventure, she actually was my cheering section. I love her because she loves her children and will fight for them. I wasn’t a big fan at first, but she was acting like a wife and mother.

Craig is a different ball of wax. He claims to love Justin, but only if he will be what Craig wants. Justin had a hard time with it. He remembers being happy and Craig being a good dad. It hurt to watch Justin during that time. Justin doesn’t dwell on it anymore. He said if Craig wants to be his dad he’ll have to prove it.

I think it’s why he worries for JR and Gus. He wants them to have safety nets. He had all of us. With Gus being so far from family, anything could happen and it would take hours to reach him.

They had to stay at the station all night. That is what I think about, my child had no family to comfort him when it went bad.

Gus is acting like nothing happened. It worries Jen, and that worries me. Jen watched it happen to Justin so she is watching Gus to see if he is doing the same things Justin did.

GUS’S POV

It’s been fun playing in the pool and I got out the soccer ball and Ben, Tucker, and I played on the tennis court. Just kicking it around. Dad usually plays to but he wanted to talk to Grandma Jen. JR was tired so she sat in Justin’s lap and watched from the sideline.

Michael was sitting over by the pool in a chair watching. Ben said Michael was tired, it looked more like he was pouting. Justin whispered something to JR. She got up and ran toward Michael screaming I LOVE YOU. Michael seemed fine after that. Ben walk by Justin later and said thanks.

I asked JR what happened and she said Justin told her that she needed to show her dad some love. Michael is so weird sometimes.

Everyone was leaving and the truth is I am tired. It’s been fun, but they need to go home. Michael asked my dad if they could talk and Dad said that he wanted Ben and Justin in there too.

MICHAEL’S POV

I wanted to talk to Brian. First to make sure he didn’t make a big deal out of the party. Second about them needing to back me up with JR. Third because I hadn’t really been able to talk to him much since everything had been going on.

Brian asked Ma to stay with the kids in the living room. The four of us went into Brian’s home office.

“Look I know that you didn’t mean any harm Justin, but JR needs to realize that she can’t always run to you when she’s mad at me. I need to make sure that if she is acting like a brat she doesn’t get rewarded.” I tell them.

“Brian, I know that you want to give Gus things, but you do to much and JR can’t understand why she can have anything she asks for.” I want to make sure Brian understands what his buying half the world for Gus is doing to me.

BRIAN’S POV

I was going to let Ben talk to Michael but I can’t. I look at Ben and he nods his head.

“Before I say anything, all of us need to agree no screaming matches. The kids are still having issues and don’t need that from us.” I say that to everyone, but I’m aiming it to Michael.

Making sure that everyone nods in agreement. I begin.

“Michael, your daughter needs you to find things for her to do that interest her. You spent 4 hours today with her in a comic shop. She is a little girl not a boy. It doesn’t interest her. What I buy for my son is not your business. What did JR want you to buy that was such a big deal?” I ask him staying calm.

“I bought her clothes and stuff she needed, when I tried to get her to look at board games she didn’t want them.” He isn’t telling us everything.

“What did she want Michael?” Ben asks.

“She wanted a sketchbook and pencils like Justin has. I know they aren’t expensive but I wanted her to want something fun like a game or even dolls.” He tells Ben.

I know why Michael doesn’t want to by JR the art supplies. It links her to Justin, but has Michael thought about the fact that Lindsay is an artist too.

“Jesus Michael, let her have it. I mean she has two people in her life that are artists. It is something she can do to feel closer to Lindsay.” Ben tells him.

“I didn’t think of that but she wouldn’t want to sit all day drawing.” Poor Mikey he is losing and knows it.

“Look I have a hundred sketchbooks lying around. Take one for her and give it to her Michael. Any pencil will do at her age. Don’t be critical of what she’s drawing. If you don’t like it, shut up.” Justin grabs a sketchbook and puts it in Michael’s hands.

“I’m sorry Justin, it’s just that you have more in common with her than I do. Everything I want to do with her, she gets bored with. You show up and it’s fun all the time.” Michael tells Justin.

“Michael, all you have to do is listen to JR. Tell her you’ll do anything within reason and she’ll be fine.” Ben tells Michael.

We have accomplished enough tonight so we walk out. JR wanted to stay but Ben told her they had plans for tomorrow. Gus walks by and tells us he is tired and wants to go to bed.

As everyone leaves I grab Justin and tell him he needs to pay up.

BEN’S POV

On the ride home, JR was asleep. I want to talk to Michael but we need to do it without her waking up. I understand that he wants JR to like spending time doing things he likes, but why can’t he try to let her do what she likes. Brian was right when he said that Justin plans with the kids in mind. I do the same when I have either of them.

“Michael, can you try to at least listen to what they told you tonight. I know that it’s hard to not be JR’s hero but she needs you to be her dad.” I tell him.

Michael is looking through the windshield. “Ben, I’m trying but sometimes it’s hard to watch my daughter worship at the Justin’s feet. I want her to look at me like that. When she was born I told Brian I wanted to be more to her then a drop in dad.”

I know that Michael still has feelings for Brian, but he put away the idea that it would ever lead to anything. The problem is, he sees Justin with Brian and it puzzles him, why Justin. He couldn’t have survived the kind of relationship those two had. Brian told me that he loves Michael for always being there, but Michael needed someone to take care of him. Brian knew that that would have killed their friendship. He also said he wasn’t brave enough to want Deb as a mother-in-law.

“If you repeat today, you will become a drop in dad. We talked about this, but the minute it got hard, instead of trying to solve it you left it to your mother.” I hope Michael is listening.

“You’re right okay, I know that but why couldn’t she have tried to read a comic. She just threw it to the floor and started spinning the racks.” He didn’t understand.

“She’s 9, Michael, they get bored and they mess with things. I know you had to work and she was going to have to be with you but couldn’t you have let her draw or rent some movies.

Anything but push her off on your mother, who was also working.” I need him to listen.

“Look I’ll do both of those things when she’s comes with me to work again. I know I should have thought of that myself but we don’t usually have her more than a week or two and I plan for those times.” He tells me.

He is right we never have her for long periods of time. Hopefully he’ll adjust to this and will get better with her. Michael loves her and wants to do the right thing. He is also used to not having to plan things for her. We normally do that when we know she’s coming.

We get home and I carry her to bed. She is out.

JUSTIN’S POV

Everyone is asleep and I want to paint something. When I talked to JR and told her to go to Michael the look on his face was something I want to paint. I think he sometimes misses out on fun because he feels neglected. I was sketching it out on the canvas, when I heard the door to the room open. Gus is standing there he just looks at me. The sketching will have to wait.

Gus needs attention right now.

“Come in, sit anywhere.” I tell him.

“Can I talk and you listen Justin?” He asks me.

I nod and hope that he wants to talk about his moms. My mom told me to let Gus take it at his own pace, when he was ready, let him talk. She felt that was a mistake she made with me. She was trying to fix me. Which drove me away. I wait to see and figure I’ll be whatever he needs. Brian walks into the room.

“Can I stay if I listen?” He asks Gus.

“Yes Dad, but it’s hard for me to explain if you get upset.” Poor Gus, he is worried that Brian is going to be mad.

We both promise to do our best to listen and not judge or say anything.

“Until I talked to Justin, about the moms fighting, I didn’t realize that it hurt JR and I too. I mean they never fight with us or about us. Justin, you said that it wasn’t okay that JR and I are scared in our home. It’s not just the fighting but the fact that if something happens, who is there for us? I don’t want to live so far from everyone. I don’t think that the moms will agree to come back here. I also want Mel to stop getting mad at my dad for helping out. If Justin had sent them money, I don’t think Mel would have made it into a big issue. I don’t know much about what happened before we left here but I know they fight about it still. I don’t want Dad to be the reason they are fighting.” Gus is crying and Brian holds him.

“Gus listen to me. You have nothing to do with your mothers not getting along. Mel and I just can’t agree on anything. That is our fault, not yours. I can’t make them move back but I promise that either Justin or I will visit more. You don’t need to worry about what us stupid adults do. Your job is being a kid.” Brian tells Gus.

Gus nods and we can tell he just want to sleep. Brian walks him to his room. I feel better now that he has gotten that out. I wish he didn’t feel that way, but I understand that it’s there. Gus has been calling the girls by their first names and when I asked why he said they aren’t acting like moms. I want to record everything he says and make them listen.

I didn’t want to paint any more. I walk out to see Brian standing in the hall, head hanging down and the world on his shoulders. I let him hold on to me.