Chapter Two: “Introductions and Endings”

October 29, 2005

“You sure you want this?”

Justin nodded his head in answer and whispered, “Yes.”

Over the last six hours, he and the Irishman had talked about everything in their lives, with the exception of the topic of sex. That issue they both avoided talking about, surprisingly.

However, Justin knew from the minute the Irishman invited him into his room that he would end up, underneath the gorgeous man’s body, eager to dispose of his virginity and become an experienced sexual man.

“Here, put the condom on me,” the man told Justin, kneeling beside his shoulder, one hand running through his blond hair.

Justin could not resist pumping the man’s cock a few times, wanting to memorize what a man’s dick felt like. Robbie’s exceptionally small penis had nothing on the huge, perfect erection the Irishman sported. He turned his head and reached his tongue out to lick the head of the cock as the foreskin retracted each time he pulled on the dick. He tasted delicious to Justin and he kept lapping at the tip over and over to receive more pre-come that flowed from the tip.

“Enough,” the Irishman spoke gruffly, playfully pushing Justin’s head away from him.

Justin looked up and smiled at the man, happy that he’d given the man so much pleasure by just licking him that he felt the need to hurry things along. He rolled the latex down over the large, pulsing erection and played his fingers in the auburn pubes as he awaited the next instructions.

“Lie back, mo grá,” the man whispered. He gently pushed Justin down onto his back and moved between his thighs.

Justin stared into the hazel eyes as his legs were placed onto the man’s sculpted shoulders. His heartbeat quickened when he felt the press of the lubed penis touch his entrance. A slight pause and then pressure led to pain radiating from his insides causing him to cry out and squeeze his eyes shut. Justin felt even more pressure as the cock slid slowly inside of him. He fisted the sheets underneath him as his hole stretched and shifted around the cock invading his tight welcoming body.

“Relax, it’s only going to hurt for a few minutes, I promise. Then it’s going to feel so good,” the man vowed. He draped himself over and whispered into his ear, “Mo, maighdean.”

Justin moaned, feeling both pain and pleasure ebb and flow through his entire body. He didn’t know that sex could feel so good and so bad at the same time, no matter how hard he’d tried to prepare himself for it. His eyes, filled with wonder opened and landed on the auburn man looming over him.

“Airíonn tú chomh leas, mo ghrá geal,” the man spoke in Irish again.

“What?” Justin whispered.

“You feel so good, my bright love,” the Irish man replied for clarification as he bent down to kiss the blond.

Justin lost himself in the kiss that soon turned into much more.

***

March 14, 2006

Justin awoke from the nice flashback/dream he was having to the sound of voices and the sun beaming into his temporary room’s windows. He could hear Eleanor speaking and then he heard his mother’s voice.

“Mom?” Justin whispered aloud, confused as to why his mother was in New Jersey today. Hope started to take root in his heart as he forgot about the words he had heard when he’d eavesdropped. “I’ll do whatever I have to,” he spoke quietly to the baby.

She’s come to take me back home, he thought excitedly. I’ll apologize for talking rudely to them and promise them that I’ll do whatever it is they ask, as long as I can keep my baby and go home. I don’t care if it’s them that should be apologizing, I have to do what I can to get out of Eleanor’s house!

Quickly, Justin went to his drawers and pulled out his nicest pair of khaki dress slacks. It was a bit of a struggle getting them to zip so he opted to fold the material in to keep them up. He found one of the larger blue t-shirts he owned and slipped into it. He then calmly opened his bedroom door and made his way to the den room.

"Justin, you're awake," Eleanor said surprised, as she and Jennifer stood up from the couch.

Justin just stared at his mother and she stared back at him, giving her son an ‘almost’ smile. Neither one knew what to say; both of them held back the urge to rush into the other's arms frantically.

Jennifer could tell by the looks of her son that in the time he had been living in New Jersey he had lost weight and had obviously not been getting enough rest. He was not doing well in Aunt Eleanor’s home. Since Craig would not allow Justin to live at home with them, fearing for his safety, Jennifer had had no choice but to send him with Eleanor until she could find another way to help him. She was glad that she now had another alternative, one that she hoped would be better for Justin.

"Good Morning," Justin finally managed to speak.

"Hello sweetheart," Jen said with a guilty smile. She walked toward him and kissed his cheek before leaning back to take in his appearance. “Oh honey, you should really tuck in your shirt. What have I told you about looking presentable as often as you can?" She then proceeded to lift her son's shirt and do it for him.

“No, Mom,” Justin's hand went over his mother’s to stop her but it was too late.

"Justin! You... you're... you have a belly already," Jennifer said in awe as she looked at the bump of a tummy her normally thin son had developed. It was her first look at Justin’s stomach and the image of it made her realize that everything that was happening was real and wasn’t going to stop with just her solution to help. Her little boy was going to have a baby and there would be a lot more to help him with very soon.

Justin pulled his shirt back down, embarrassed by his mother’s gaze. "The doctor said that I’ll really start to grow this month,” he told her, referring to the appointment he’d had the day before. “They even gave me a picture of the baby this time. Do you want to see it?" he asked hopefully.

Justin had known that because he was unmarried, his pregnancy unplanned, and that he would be telling his parents he did not know who the father was, would make telling his parents he was pregnant, horrible. He did not expect it to be as bad as it turned out to be.

However, from the beginning he knew that there was no changing it. He had waited until he was almost four months along to tell his mom and dad, knowing that by then it would be too late for them to suggest an abortion. For even though he had made a mistake, and he was terrified of having a child at his age, alone, he was elated at the idea of meeting his baby for the first time.

It had surprised him how cold his mother and father had been. Then their cold shock turned to anger and Craig spewed some of the harshest words he’d ever uttered to Justin. They asked if the child was Robbie’s, but Justin told them it was not Robbie’s child, he told them that he’d had sex with a number of men around the time of his conception and that he had not been with Robbie. If he had not told his parents that, they would have called Robbie’s parents and demanded they marry.

The last thing Justin wanted was to have a shotgun wedding and marry a boy who did not even want a child. Even if Robbie was the other father, Justin knew that his parent’s marriage was a marriage of convenience, not of love. He couldn’t bear to fall victim to that same fate. He would rather raise the baby by himself. He believed that Robbie was only in shock and it would be only a matter of time before they would once again be back together.

"Oh, Justin, don't be bothering your mother with such things. We have a lot of important matters to discuss today," Eleanor told him unkindly.

Justin frowned and sighed. He realized that it would be a long time, if ever, until anyone besides himself got excited about his pregnancy and his baby.

Jennifer put her hand on her son's growing stomach for just a moment. “Go get that picture, Justin. I would love to see the first images of my grandchild. After that, we will have to talk," she told him smiling a little.

Justin's face turned into a beaming smile and he nearly ran to his room. He quickly found the photo his doctor had printed of his sonogram tucked within the drawer of his nightstand. When he returned to the den, he ignored the agitated look Eleanor sent his way and sat beside his mother on the sofa. “Here, look Mom, it’s amazing.”

Jennifer took the photos and studied them. Justin leaned over and started to point at the black and white image. "You see, right there is my baby’s heart," Justin started to explain all the parts visible in the pictures of the small fetus. Jennifer listened intently, happy that her son seemed so happy when the last time she had seen him he had been so utterly sad.

When the last part of the baby’s first picture had been explained, Eleanor jumped into the conversation, "Jen, I think it's time we talk to your son and tell him what we have decided."

Jennifer gave Justin back the pictures and took a deep breath. “Justin, your father and I, and your Aunt Eleanor have all decided that it would be best for you to stay with your Godmother Andrea in Paris.”

“During the remainder of your pregnancy,” Eleanor clarified with finality.

Justin felt like his heart was being torn from his chest. His family, his mother was sending him away just as Eleanor had said! Once again his mother was trying to get rid of him. Except this time, it would be further and more permanent. He could tell that his mother was still talking but when he looked at her, he felt such hatred toward the woman. This wasn't best for him or his baby! It was what was best for them. None of them could care less about him. They just wanted his mistake out of their perfect lives.

"Justin, did you hear you're mother?" Eleanor asked.

Justin smiled politely. “Yes, I understand," he tried to make his voice stay calm. This would be the last time he heard anything any of them had to say. “When do I leave?" he asked.

Jennifer stared at her son in surprise. She could not believe her child wasn't going to fight this. She had hoped he would so it would give her an out to buy more time that might be used to figure out a plan to keep Justin close to her, so she could help him though everything! "You want to go, Justin?" she asked.

Justin felt himself recoil on the inside but told her with a smile. “If it's far away from here," away from you, he thought, "and if you think it's for the best," for you, "then I'm sure I will be just fine."

Jennifer smiled and thought that maybe that was for the best. She had faith that her best friend Andrea, Justin's godmother, would take good care of her child. Now that it sounded as though her son was willing to go, it set her mind at ease. “Your father and I have packed your things from home, you'll take an afternoon flight tomorrow. That will give you enough time to pack your things from here, won't it?"

Justin stood up from his seat and nodded at his mother, pasting a smile on his face. "Sure, I'll get started now."`

Jennifer tried to stand and reach out to hug Justin, but her son did not notice.

Eleanor however gave her a stern look and told her, “You shouldn’t encourage him.”

***

March 15, 2006

Justin boarded the airplane and was shown to his seat by a flight attendant. This was the first time flying alone without his mother and father beside him. He was a little nervous. Then again, he wasn’t exactly alone.

"If you need anything at all, be sure and let us know, okay?" the redheaded flight attendant asked, smiling at him.

"Thank you. I think I'm just going to go to sleep, but do you think you can wake me when the first meal time comes?"

"I sure will, would you care for a pillow and blanket? Your seat will also recline for you with a foot rest if you would like that," she pointed at the buttons on the side panel next to the window.

Justin smiled widely. First class in a Jet was the way to fly. He was glad his mom and dad had arranged first class seating. He was even more happy that he’d taken two years of drama class. He replayed the last conversation he had with his mother in his head.

***

“Mom, please. I’ll be fine. It would be too hard for me if you came into the terminal for us to say our goodbyes,” Justin said tearfully.

“What do you mean? I have to at least help you with all your luggage,” Jennifer said worriedly.

“I’ll get an attendant, Mom,” Justin looked around the parking space to find one.

“Are you sure, Justin?” Jennifer asked, her eyes tear-filled.

“I’m sure Mom,” Justin said. “It has to be this way.”

Jennifer took Justin into her arms, hugged and kissed him. “Call me as soon as you land.”

“I will, Mom. Goodbye.” Justin felt his real emotions surfacing as he hugged and kissed his mother one last time.

***

Justin put his hand over his stomach and drifted off into the first peaceful slumber he’d had in a long time.

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