Chapter Six: “Pósadh”

April 3, 2006 - Justin’s P.O.V.

“Brian, come on… we’re going to be late,” I say, knocking on the door to the other spare room. I’ve started to call it the ‘Mystery Room’ because he refuses to let me in there.

“Just a minute,” he calls back from behind the door. “I didn’t realize the time.”

Really, we aren’t going to be late we still have an hour before my appointment, but he was in there before I even woke up. I don’t knows how long it’s going to take him to clean up so I want to be sure we enough time.

The other day he had primer all over his clothes and stain on his hands and it took him almost an hour to shower it all off. He made us late getting out to Betsy’s house. She of course didn’t mind and considering the fact that Brian is his own boss, we didn’t get in trouble; but I don’t want to be late and possibly not get a chance to have the ultrasound done and have to reschedule.

“Get away from the door,” he advises. “I’m coming out.”

I roll my eyes at his secrecy and walk back down the hall into the living room. “It’s safe to come out!” I can’t help but laugh after I say this.

“It better be,” he yells back. I hear him moving stuff around in the room and then he jiggles the door handle.

I stand at the end of the hall, my hands on my hips, watching as Brian slowly cracks the door open. His head peaks out and he looks down the opposite end of the hall and then toward me. He smiles at me and steps out, quickly shutting the door behind him and locking it with his key. “I’m just going to wash up and change my clothes,” he tells me, retreating into his bedroom.

“Okay,” I answer and walk into the kitchen and open the refrigerator door. Scanning the shelves, I wait to see if something appeals to my ever-hungry stomach. I just finished eating Ireland’s equivalent of fruit loops but I need something else, rather, the baby does.

“What do you feel like eating?” I ask the baby. My mouth waters and my stomach grumbles in answer as my eyes fall on the cinnamon buns Betsy gave me yesterday. “Cinnamon bun yum it is.” I rub my belly with one hand while I take the baking tin out with the other. I give a kick to the fridge door to close it and set the food on the island. Once the lid off the pan is off, the smell of sweetness hits my nostrils. Wait. I can’t eat this without a nice glass of milk too. I quickly grab the milk out and pour a large glass, get a fork and sit down in front of the breakfast cake. “Mmm…” I say aloud, and dig my fork into the gooey goodness.

Oh. Yeeeeahhhhhh. My taste buds go crazy, causing my brain to go into a hyperactive wonderland. Before I know it, I’ve finished my milk and all but one of the four large buns are left in the pan.

“Did ya save me any?” Brian asks, walking into the kitchen.

He smells all fresh and clean from his shower, like Irish Spring body wash. I have to stop myself from laughing every time I smell it because it’s just too funny. Of all the body washes to use he chooses Irish Spring! I smell more than that now though. I think he’s put on some cologne too because there’s a cool-sweet smell surrounding him and it’s not the sticky buns.

“I can’t believe you ate them all,” he pouts.

I can’t help the blush rising in my cheeks. I really would probably eat that last one, but I know they’re his favorite. So, being the good guest that I am, I offer him my fork and slide the pan toward him.

“Thanks, mo grá.” He smiles and takes a big bite of the last bun. Some of the icing slips out onto his lip and I watch as his tongue pokes out, swiping it back into his mouth.

“What is, ‘Moe Grer’, Brian?” I ask referring to the Irish word I’ve heard him say many times now.

Brian rolls his eyes at me. “Why do you keep asking me? I’m not going to tell you”

I’m not sure why I persist in asking him. He rarely tells me what any of the words mean. It’s another one of his secrets I suppose I’m going to have to unravel. I need to find one of those Irish dictionaries. Of all the Irish books I have read you’d think I would have found one of those by now.

“Here, have the rest,” Brian says, sliding the pan back in front of me.

“There is still half left,” I protest.

Brian laughs and picks a big piece up with his fork. I think he’s going to eat it, but instead he waves it in front of my mouth. “Come on, Justin,” he taunts me, “the baby is hungry. I can hear your stomach still growling.”

He’s really too kind. I roll my eyes and open my mouth wide… shit the piece is huge. He holds my gaze as he feeds it to me. I close my mouth and chew the sweet confection very slowly, our eyes still locked. I don’t know why or what’s happening, but something does in that moment.

My entire body starts to heat up and I can’t look away from him. My heart is doing that hammering thing again and the way his hazel eyes start to change to a deeper richer color are making my insides quiver. I force myself to look away from him and back down at the pan in front of me.

I close my eyes for a minute and let out a deep breath. I have to remind myself that Brian is only my friend. I’m having Robbie’s baby and no matter how great Brian Kinney may be, he would never want me now. Sure he wanted me when I was an innocent virgin, a one-night-stand, but definitely not now that I’m a knocked up teenage runaway with barely any future.

“Justin,” his voice cracks as he speaks my name.

I try not to revel in the tingling him speaking my name causes within me and remind myself of my place in his life. “Yeah?”

“You…” he sighs and then shakes his head and his whole demeanor changes. He smiles. “You ready to go see your baby?”

Just the thought makes my mood shift out of the anguish I was in. “Definitely.”

“Go get your sweater, I’ll clean this up,” he tells me, smirking. I know he’s going to finish the piece while I’m in the other room.

***

Brian’s P.O.V.

I opted to stay in the waiting area for Justin to have his examination because I don’t want him to feel uncomfortable. I’ve been waiting for about a half hour out here, reading all the magazines about parenting and glancing through the books on childbirth; which has actually held my interest.

“Brian Kinney?” A nurse calls my name, standing in the open doorway.

She looks upset and it takes me a second before I can speak, “That’s me.”

“Could you please come on back. Justin’s asking for you,” she tells me, biting her lower lip.

I feel a chill race down my spine and try not to panic as I nod and quickly follow her through the door and down the hall. She knocks on the door to where I guess Justin is and walks away as Doctor Shanna opens the door and gestures me inside.

“What’s going on?” I ask when I see Justin, sitting up on the table, sobbing into his hands. A nurse is rubbing his shoulders and whispering to him, trying to calm him down, but he doesn’t seem to be hearing her or taking any comfort from her.

Shanna gives me an apologetic look. “He’s upset, but I can’t exactly figure out why,” she reveals, patting my shoulder. “I think he may just be really over whelmed, perhaps you can talk to him and help?”

“I’ll do my best,” I tell her.

“Come on, Greta,” Shanna prompts the nurse. “Let’s give them some time alone.”

Nurse Greta follows Shanna out of the room and closes the door. I stand still, not sure how to proceed. “Are you hurt?” I ask cautiously. “Is there something wrong with the baby?” I breathe out the second question in a fearful gasp.

He shakes his head back and forth and wipes his eyes with the cloth the nurse had handed him before she left. “No,” he speaks so quietly I barely hear him. “Everything went great with me and the baby so far.”

I approach him slowly. “What is it?”

“I… it’s just… I didn’t know doctors and nurses could be so….” he whispers.

“So ‘what’, Justin?” I ask, completely confused. “We met Shanna before and I thought you really liked her. Did something bad happen in here?”

“No, no. It was nice. They were nice.”

“Nice?” I ask, feeling even more confused. If it was nice, why is he crying? Why is does he look so upset?

“Both of the doctors I saw in America were so cold. The doctor in New Jersey was so quick about everything,” he explains. “He made me feel like he hated me for what I’d done, just like everyone else. I didn’t think he really cared about my baby and I thought he was only humoring me when I asked questions and asked for the ultra-sound pictures.”

“God, Justin,” I speak, barely able to find words. I wrap my arms around him, card my fingers through his hair and feel him relax a little. “I’m sorry that’s how it was for you. You told me how your family was but I thought that all baby doctors and nurses were supposed to be as caring as Shanna seemed to be.”

“They aren’t,” he says sadly. “The nurses and doctor looked at me like I was just some stupid kid that got knocked up. They didn’t really care about my baby and the oral exam was so painful,” he speaks, his voice shaking. “I just… I thought that was just how all doctors were during exams; cold and distant. I thought that was how it was going to be here and then Shanna and Nurse Greta were so nice to me. It startled me, you know?”

“Yeah,” I replied, though I couldn’t ever really know what he’d been through. I close my eyes and silently thank my grandmother for sending us here and curse the ignorant doctors who treated him before.

He moves out of my arms and looks up at me with a tortured expression. “Shanna doesn’t know that I’m just a kid that’s boyfriend knocked him up. If she did….”

“That isn’t who you are,” I interrupt him. “None of that should matter to a doctor, Justin. They’re supposed to be caring and care for you and your baby. I’m sure if Shanna and Greta knew the truth, they wouldn’t treat you any differently.” I put my hand on his stomach. “You are carrying a little life inside of you, Justin. Life. You’re an amazing creature because of that and you deserve to be treated like a Prince from everyone.”

He gives me a watery smile. “She thinks… she thinks that you’re the Da’. She called you that last time and when I started to cry, she asked me if I wanted her to go get Da’. I didn’t tell her you weren’t, Brian. I was afraid that’d she’d be mean to me if I told her the truth.”

“Oh,” was all I could really say for a minute. I don’t like to lie to people. Especially friends of my grandmother’s, but if I’m honest with myself… I wish like crazy that I was the Da’. The first moments that I saw him and thought I was the father of his baby, it made me feel more excited and thrilled than I’d ever felt about anything. When I realized that I wasn’t the father, it was definitely an emotional blow. “That’s all right,” I tell him. “It doesn’t have to matter and if it makes you feel better, you can tell her that, Justin.”

“You promise it doesn’t bother you?” His face scrunches up in a funny expression that always makes me smile and I can’t resist kissing his forehead.

“It doesn’t bother me,” I assure him. I place my hand on his stomach again and whisper, “Tá mé chomh doirte sin duit.”

“What?” he asks, hoping I’ll reveal my secrets.

Before I have to once again tell him that I’m not going to reveal what I’m speaking Shanna knocks on the door to the room to see if we were ready to continue and have the ultra-sound.

“Are you ready?” I ask him quietly.

He gives me a tight hug and says, “I am now.”

***

Justin reaches his arm out toward me, wiggling his fingers. “Come here, Brian.”

I step closer to his bedside and take his cold hand in mine and rub it, trying to warm him up. “Are you excited?”

He looks up at me; his blue eyes become large as he nods his head. “Yes, a little nervous, but excited too.”

“Okay,” Shanna says, turning on the monitor and rolling her chair closer to Justin. “Let me put some of this gel on you and we’ll be all set.”

I’m so glad too see Justin smiling his mega-watt smile again. I want this to be a wonderful experience for him because I don’t think he’ll ever forgive himself if he lets the circumstances of the baby’s conception taint his pregnancy any more. His family tried to do that but I won’t let him believe that they were right for doing it.

“Look, Brian.” Justin squeezes my hand. “The baby is sucking its thumb!”

I focus on the screen and can see the little image of the baby’s profile. “Holy Shit!”

“I’ll take a photo of that one for you guys to take home,” Shanna tells us happily.

I look at her and watch her move the device around on Justin’s stomach. We see the baby suddenly move on the screen and Justin’s hand flies onto his jelly covered abdomen.

“Oh man,” Justin gasps, wide eyed. “I’ve not felt it like that before.”

Shanna smiles at him. “Well you’re bound to feel more movement now in that you’re in the second trimester.”

We all look at the screen and see the baby moving around and around, as though it’s swimming.

“I bet all that sugar from those Cinnamon buns just reached the baby,” Justin laughs and lifts his hand up from the sticky jell.

I grab the rag and wipe his hand off for him.

“Do you think you can tell the sex now?” Justin asks.

“I think so,” Shanna answers.

I see her move the device down to the lower part of his abdomen, just above the waistband of his underwear. I realize that this is probably the most I’ve seen of Justin’s body since our night together. He rarely walks around without his shirt and I definitely haven’t seen him in his underwear. His belly is so perfectly round and he looks to be in perfect shape.

“There we go,” Shanna exclaims happily.

“Oh, Brian,” Justin giggles.

My attention goes back to the screen and it’s completely obvious.

“It’s a girl!” Justin says excitedly. “I’m having a little girl, Brian. I can’t believe it!”

“You are,” I say in amazement. I smile back at him then look at the screen. “M'iníonacha,” I whisper before I place my hand just over where the gown is raised on his stomach, lift it a little higher and lean down and kiss the bare skin that’s not covered in the gel. “M'iníonacha,” I repeat.

***

Justin’s P.O.V.

“So what are you going to name her?” Betsy asks me, pouring me another glass of the herbal tea.

“We discussed some names on the drive over,” Brian answers for us. I look at him, he’s so happy. He seems to be as happy as I am. It’s so wonderful having him to share this with me.

“And what are those names, mo grá?” Betsy asks Brian, using the same Irish word Brian uses with me. It must be a term of endearment.

“You tell her, Justin,” Brian prompts me. His hand squeezes my thigh under the table for a moment.

I smile and take a sip of my tea before answering, “Well, for the first name I was thinking of Emerald.”

Betsy smiles. “Emerald is beautiful name, very fitting.”

I nod. “I’m going to call her Emma for short.”

“Tell her the middle name,” Brian prompts me. His grin is so bright; you’d think it was him I am naming my daughter after.

I give Betsy a warm smile. “Her middle name will be Elizabeth.”

Betsy gasps and I see tears fill her eyes immediately. “Oh, mo páiste!”

Brian laughs and gets up from the table. He crouches in front of Betsy and puts his arms around her. “Tá mé chomh doirte sin duit, Móraí.”

“Tá mé chomh doirte sin duit mo’ mac an mo’ gariníon,” Betsy whispers to him.

“Móraí,” Brian laughs and stands up, shaking his head.

I feel completely left out right now. I really need to learn Irish. If Brian won’t tell me what he’s saying maybe I can get Betsy to tell me.

We all hear a loud knock coming form downstairs.

“Who is that Brian?” Betsy asks. “I thought you said you didn’t have any clients today.”

“I don’t,” Brian tells her and walks over to the window. “Shit!”

“Don’t use that language with a child present,” Betsy chastises him.

“Hey, I’m not a child,” I huff out.

Betsy laughs at me. “I was referring to Emma. You’re far enough along now that she can hear others now, can’t she?”

“That’s what Shanna says.”

“I’ve got to go down and see what Brogan wants,” Brian says as we hear the loud knocking again.

“Who… who is Brogan?” I ask. From the look on Brian’s face, it has to be someone he doesn’t like.

“He’s a police officer,” Betsy tells me.

“I’ll go see what he wants,” Brian growls.

“Be nice,” Betsy says, stopping Brian with her hand on his arm.

“Tell that to him,” Brian says as he walks out of the room.

When he closes the door, I ask Betsy, “Did he and Brian… date?”

“Picked up on the tension did you?” Betsy laughs. “Don’t worry. It was a long time ago and for a very short time while they were school boys.”

“Oh. Okay.” I’m not sure why I feel so jealous. It must be my weird ass emotions or something.

Betsy gives me a funny smile. “What is it, mo páiste?”

That reminds me. “What does that mean, Betsy?”

***

Brian’s P.O.V.

“Is there a problem officer?” I ask. I know I probably have a disgusted smirk on my face but I can’t help it.

“I’m looking for Justin Taylor.”

What the fuck? “What do you want with him?” I’ll be damned if I’m going to let Brogan within ten feet of Justin before I find out why he needs to see him.

“He’s an illegal, Brian,” Brogan says, dragging one of his hands over the silver badge pinned to his green shirt.

I laugh. “An illegal? He’s only been visiting for two weeks?”

“It’s been over two weeks, Brian,” he replies, tapping his foot on the step to the entryway.

“What does that matter?” I ask.

“He filled out a temporary visitors pass in customs. That allows for two weeks of stay. I was informed he’s been here for longer and hasn’t gone to request any additional time since then.” He drags his hand over his badge again, making me want to rip it off him.

“So I’ll take him up to the Court to fill another out after we finish lunch,” I reply, and start to close the door.

He stops the door with his arm. “We’re going to have to deport him.”

I throw open the door wide and angrily ask, “Have you gone mad, Brogan?”

“It’s my job, Brian. Deportation is really cracking down on us and he’s officially here illegally.”

“How did you even find him?” I wonder.

“He listed this address as his place of stay with customs. So… I’m going to need to see him and take him with me.”

“The fuck you are,” I yell. There is no way in hell I’m letting anyone take Justin away from me.

“This matter doesn’t really concern you, Brian. Now, is he here or not? I need to speak with him. Keep in mind that if you lie to me I will get a warrant to seize him and deport him. As of right now, he’s in violation of Code 713 and he will not be allowed back into the country and there may also be fines to pay because of this.”

I feel like I’m about to punch Brogan so I take a step back inside the house and try to calm down as I think about what I’m going to do. “Just… let me go and announce you first. He’s having tea in the dining room with my Grandmother. Give us a minute before you come in, okay?”

Brogan rolls his dark brown eyes and steps into the foyer. “Make it quick,” he orders.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck! How could this happen? This can’t be happening. Why didn’t I think to ask Justin about this? Why? Fuck!

I leave Brogan in the foyer and rush down the hall and up the few steps of stairs leading to the dining room. I open the door, interrupting Justin and my Grandmother’s conversation. “Just agree with everything I tell him,” I say quickly, in a hushed voice.

“What?” My grandmother shakes her head. “What’s going on Mo’ mac?”

“Are you in trouble, Brian?” Justin asks his face paler than normal.

I walk over to him and put my hand on top of his. “No, Justin I’m not. But you may be.” I quickly tell him what Brogan told me at the door. He starts to get teary eyed and I try to soothe him and tell him of my plan.

Before I can explain, Brogan makes a quick knock on the door and then steps in.

“What are you doing here interrupting our lunch and tea, Broggie?” My Grandmother asks in an annoyed tone.

I almost laugh aloud at the look on Officer Brogan’s face but I’m too terrified of what might happen to do so.

“I’m sorry, Mam,” Brogan apologizes to my Grandmother. “But this is official police business.” He directs his attention to Justin. “Are you Justin Taylor?”

Justin gulps and nods.

“I’m going to need to take you with me. You’re being deported.”

“But I can’t leave,” Justin gasps out.

I squeeze his hand and rub his shoulder. “Shhh… you’re not going anywhere.” I won’t allow it!

“I’m sorry, Brian, but he is. He is now an illegal.”

“But…but I was going to….”

I interrupt him with my plan, “He was going to marry me.”

“Brian!” Justin gasps his eyes huge as he stares at me open-mouthed.

Now my Grandmother stands up and levels Brogan with her gaze. “You go back to those officers and you tell them that Justin isn’t going anywhere.”

“I can’t do that. I have my orders…”

“Oh no, please,” Justin begs. He pushes his chair out from table and stands beside me. “You can’t do that!”

I put my arm around his waist and rest my hand on his stomach.

Brogan looks Justin up and down and gasps, “You’re…”

“Your mother would be ashamed of you if she were here, Broggie. Can’t you see you’re scaring him? He doesn’t need this stress. He’s having my Grandchild,” my grandmother says, surprising Justin and myself. “That child he’s carrying is a legal citizen of this country. Justin was going to file for citizenship but then Brian asked him to marry him. Isn’t that right, Justin?”

“But…” Justin fumbles with his words. “I….”

“You were going to marry him, Brian?” Brogan asks me in disbelief.

“Yes. We haven’t set an exact date but…”

“You need to be married by the end of next week,” Brogan cuts in. “I’m going to get my head bitten off for being lenient and I’ll explain the situation to the officials. But… that’s it. Can you be married by the end of next week?”

“Brian.” Justin turns and looks at me, his teary eyes telling me that I don’t have to do it.

But I will. I’m not letting him go. I know too, that once Justin is married to me, legally that child will be mine too. I won’t let him take the baby and go back to America. I won’t let him go and find that little shit. I won’t. He’s going to stay here with me. I’ll do everything in my power to make him stay. I want to marry him. I didn’t want it to be like this, but if this is what’s going to allow for him and the baby to stay here, with me, than I’ll sure as shit do it.

I turn to face Justin, lean down and kiss his full lips. I have to make it look real to Brogan. I feel Justin melts into my arms and he puts his hands on my waist and grips me as his mouth opens for my tongue. I give his tongue a small swipe with my own and pull back. I have to smile at the dazed look on his face for a moment before I lean in to whisper into his ear, “Ní fhágfaidh mé choíche thú agus beidh mé dílis duit i gcónaí , mo fhear céile.”

Justin sighs as though he understood me, though I know he didn’t, then he hugs me again. “Are you sure, Brian?” he whispers.

I pull back from him and take his hand. “We’ll be married by the end of the next week, Brogan.”

“See that you are. I still want you to come down to the station tomorrow and fill out another visitors pass for the time being. I’ll back date it and send it to the custom officials, tell them it got lost.”

“Thank you,” I say, smiling.

“I didn’t do it for you, Brian,” Brogan retorts and looks at my grandmother. “Betsy, I’m sorry to have interrupted your day.”

“You ought to be,” she grumbles. “I’ll walk you out.”

I watch as my grandmother leaves the room. I’m sure she’s going to give him a tongue-lashing he won’t soon forget on his way out. She was best friends with Brogan’s mother Amy while we were growing up and has always treated him much too kindly.

“Jesus Christ, Brian!” Justin whispers, dropping my hand and walking away from me.

“It’ll be okay,” I tell him.

Justin shakes his head at me and throws up his hands. “It isn’t enough that I fuck up my life but now I fuck up yours too? And I’ve got you and your grandmother lying to authorities, Brian!”

“Justin.” I try to walk toward him but he walks away from me and over to the bay window.

“I just want a safe place for me and my baby,” he whispers.

I walk behind him and put my arms around him. “I want that for you, Justin.”

He sighs and rests his head back against my shoulder. “This isn’t right, Brian. You shouldn’t have to marry someone you don’t love.”

I don’t say anything for a moment, but then decide upon my next words and speak them only to reassure him. “We can get an annulment later on, after you get your citizenship and it all looks on the up and up.”

Justin turns in my arms. “Why are you doing this? Why didn’t you just let me get deported back to America?”

“You’re my friend, Justin,” I say quietly. “I couldn’t let you go back to that place.” That kid, Robbie.

He puts his head back on my shoulder again and I just stand there and hold on to him. I’m not going to let him go.

***

New York - 3rd Person P.O.V.

“We’re really married,” Mica spoke, wrapping her arms around Robbie.

Robbie smiled and kissed his bride, kicking their hotel room door closed with his foot. “I can’t believe it!”

Mica giggled and stepped out of her husband’s arms. “We’re going to be the only people married at our school.”

“I told you as soon as we told my parents they’d make us get married,” Robbie told her, sitting down on the bed to untie his shoes.

Mica sat down beside him. “Would you have married me if I wasn’t pregnant?”

Robbie nodded. “I love you, Mica.”

“You promise?”

“I could’ve run away,” the boy told her, laughing.

“You’d never do that… right?”

Robbie shook his head. “No… now come here and let me start unbuttoning that damn dress.”

Mica turned her back. “It was my mom’s when my dad and she got married. He made me wear it.”

“You look beautiful in it.” Robbie kissed his wife’s neck as he popped the buttons.

“I’ll look even better out of it,” she giggled.

***

New York Public Library - 3rd Person P.O.V.

Jennifer clicked on the website link with the name ‘Brian Kinney’ on it. As she observed the site she couldn’t believe what she was reading. Brian was a descendent of an Irish King. She searched around and the more she read about the man, the more she was surprised.

Brian Kinney was worth millions and not only because of his family. His job restoring old churches, houses and castles was a very lucrative business.

At first, Jennifer wasn’t sure it was the right man, it all seemed so odd. She couldn’t imagine why her young son would appeal to such a man. But then, she saw his picture and there was no denying it. Justin had drawn him perfectly.

Through other links on that site she found a web page dedicated to his business. Many people whom he had done restorations for with had commented on different entries where Brian had posted pictures of the work site’s progress. The employees and people who hired him would comment on the blog entries praising him, both personally for his character and professionally for his amazing work ethic and ingenuity. In the contact information, she found an address and phone number for Brian Kinney’s business. Jennifer entered both into her blackberry. She wasn’t sure what she was going to do with her new information, but it settled her worried heart where Justin was concerned. At least the man had the means to care for her son and also seemed to be a good man.

Jennifer exited out of the page, gathered her things and walked out of the library. She dug out her cell phone the moment she stepped outside and dialed her best friend’s number. “Andrea, it’s Jen,” she spoke the moment her friend answered on the other line. “I’m sorry for bothering you, I know it’s probably late there but I had to talk to you.”

“Jen, it’s fine. What happened?” Andrea queried worriedly.

“I… I don’t know. I think so. I just found out exactly where I believe Justin is staying.”

“Did you talk to him?” Andrea asked, surprised.

“No, no… I mean, he may not actually be with this Brian, but I think that he is. But I don’t know if I should call him. I don’t want to contact him until I know what I’m going to do with Craig.”

“I thought you had decided to leave him,” Andrea said, sadly. “You know you and Molly are welcome to come here.”

“I am… I mean, I will. I now have concrete evidence of him cheating with that client and I’ve already spoken with the other shareholders of the company about this. They are loyal to me and are willing to back me in dissolving his partnership. The prenuptial agreement he signed clearly stated that control of the shares would transfer fully back to me in the event of our divorce if he committed infidelity.”

“Thank god you were able to get those photos from his assistant. I can’t believe he dared to flaunt his relationship with her at that office retreat in Hawaii!” Andrea said appalled. “I knew he was an idiot but to invite her along was just stupid.”

“I can’t say I’m glad that he did, but it saved me from hiring a private investigator. I guess he forgot about the pre-nup. Everyone in that office dislikes the image he is giving off to rival companies and clients. And his assistant was witness to the conversation I had with Craig when he tried to send Molly off to boarding school when he was drunk at work and insisted that he no longer wanted a child in his home. But I’m going to wait until Molly is out of school. She gets out in the middle of June so I think by then I should have all the loose ends tied up with the business and it should be no problem getting custody of her.”

“You’re going to wait until then to contact Justin?”

“I don’t know. I want to call him but I’ve had so many narrow escapes with Craig almost finding out that Justin isn’t there with you. He won’t leave me alone about visiting Justin soon to get him to sign adoption papers. Every time I talk to you, he wants me to reassure him that you still want to adopt ‘the bastard’, as he calls the baby. It’s terrible, Andrea.”

“I wish I could be right there to help you,” Andrea told her friend.

“You’re right where I need you,” Jennifer assured. “If you weren’t so far away there is no way that I’d be able to hide the truth from Craig.”

“I know, I just wish you could leave him sooner. I’m worried about Justin, too.”

“I know, but I don’t want Molly to suffer in school because of this and there is no way that I am leaving him here with her. I was hoping I could wait until Molly and I can just leave New York behind.”

“I suppose that’s probably for the best,” Andrea assured her friend. “Just try and not say much to him.”

Jennifer let out a false laugh. “Like that’s a problem. We haven’t had a two-way conversation in ten years.”

“Do you want me to call this number you found? I can at least ask around and make sure he’s there,” Andrea prodded her friend.

“No… I’m afraid that if Justin finds out we’re looking for him he might run again and then who knows if I’d ever see him or my grandchild.”

“I suppose your right.”

“I’ve got to go and get Molly from school. I’ll call you if anything else happens with Craig and expect me to call tomorrow night to talk to Justin, okay?”

“Sure Jen. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

Jennifer hung up the phone and walked down to her car. Her pace was slow and her heart heavy. She was so confused and she wanted to be there for her son immediately. But she had to take care of her daughter too. She put her hand over the locket that hung around her neck, inside was a picture of Justin taken the day he was born. Jennifer hoped that when she did see her son again, that he would forgive her for what she’d done.

***

Dublin, Ireland - Brian’s P.O.V.

“Will you please talk to me, Justin?” I ask, trying to keep my tone neutral. He only glares at me in response.

I turn away from him, walk into the kitchen, and start to grab out some things to make a sandwich. He can just sit in front of the fireplace and pout then. I’m not going to apologize for saving his ass.

“What are you making?” I hear him ask quietly as he shuffles his way into the kitchen.

I suppress my smile. “I thought you weren’t going to speak to me?”

“The baby wants to know,” he says softly.

“Tell the baby I’m making salami and cheese on whole wheat.”

He stops walking toward me and turns on his heel. “I hate salami.”

“I was talking to the baby,” I remind him, trying not to laugh.

He sits back down on the couch and I hear him whispering, “You’re not supposed to like it. I don’t like it but you’re going to make me eat it aren’t you?”

“Do you want mayonnaise on it?”

He sighs and gets back up and walks over to stand in front of the kitchen island. “Apparently, mayonnaise sounds disgusting today.”

He was dipping carrots in it yesterday at lunch so this is surprising. “Maybe the baby decided he had too much of it yesterday.”

Justin looks back down at his stomach. “Did you?” He looks back up at me. “Apparently you know our baby better than I do.”

He doesn’t even realize what he said. I know that. It would only embarrass him if I called him on it, so I won’t. Hearing him talk like that though, makes me realize that I am doing the right thing. He may not realize it and may be angry with me when he does, but he’ll get over it. “Is your mood swing through?”

“That was rude,” he quips.

I laugh at him. “You need to let me know then when it’s okay to talk to you.”

“I’m talking to you right now.” He gives me a half-smile and playfully slaps my arm.

“That’s really not fair. If you weren’t pregnant I’d hit you back,” I say, joking of course.

He bursts out laughing as if I just said the funniest thing in the world. “You wouldn’t.”

“Never,” I assure. I put his sandwich on a paper plate and hand it to him. “What movie do you want to watch tonight?”

He scrunches his face up and then I see his cheeks blush as he mulls over whatever he’s going to say next. “After we eat can you read to me one of those Irish stories in that big book Betsy gave you?”

“I guess.” I nod. “I get to pick it out though.”

“Fine with me,” he says, sitting down on the couch. “I just love hearing you talk with that Irish accent and …” he trails off.

“What?”

He shakes his head and takes a bite of his food. “Nothing.”

I don’t believe that. “What… tell me?”

He’s blushing like crazy now and I love it. He chews the rest of his bite and looks right into my eyes before he speaks. “I used to read those short stories and poems while imagining it was your voice in my head reading me them.”

I couldn’t make myself smile wider then I probably am at this moment if I tried. We don’t say anything else as we finish our meals, but I do keep looking at him and he catches me almost each time and his blush increases to the point that I think he’ll stay red faced forever. I feel like I’m a kid with crush when I’m around him. I do have a crush on him, but it’s more than that, obviously.

“Can I sleep in your room tonight?” Justin asks, after we read together on the couch. He looks at me through his long dark eyelashes and it sends shivers up and down my spine. I should tell him no, but I won’t. “Did that story scare you?”

“It... had a happy ending but it was a little bit scary. I don’t like the Banshee woman at all,” he tells me, snuggling closer to my body.

“No more scary Irish tales for Mr. Taylor,” I say.

“Mr. Kinney soon,” he whispers.

“You don’t have to take my name, Justin.” Okay… really he does have to. Because I want him too, because the name Taylor comes from that asshole father of his.

“It’ll make our marriage look more real if I do won’t it, Brian?” he asks.

“Yeah, probably,” I agree. “But remember, we can always get an annulment after you have the baby or whenever you’re ready.”

“I know.” he looks away and stands up. “Goodnight.”

“I thought you were going to sleep with me?” I remark with disappointment I cannot hide.

He turns around to face me and wrings his hands nervously. “I don’t want to inconvenience you, Brian. Don’t you get it? That’s all I am. That’s all I do to you, to anyone in my life. I don’t want you to feel sorry for me. I want to be your friend, not ruin your damn life. I know that I have. Don’t tell me I haven’t.”

I get up from the couch, walk over to him, and lean down so that our eyes are completely level with each others. “You aren’t ruining a thing, Justin. I don’t do anything I don’t want to do. Do you understand me? You have to stop this.” I grab him and hug him as tightly as I can with his belly in the way. “Please tell me you would do the same for me. You’d do anything to help me, to make me happy wouldn’t you?”

“Yes, Brian,” he whispers, now hugging me back.

“You’d marry me too if I needed you too, right?”

He nods. “I would. I’m sorry; I’m such a damn mess.”

I step back and take his hand. “Come on… let’s go to bed. It’s been a long day and we have a lot to do tomorrow.”

“We do?” he asks, confused.

“We have a week to plan a wedding, Justin,” I remind him, taking his hand and dragging him down the hall toward my room.

“But, I thought that… we’d just do it simply,” he says.

“Nah,” I turn to him and smile. “We’ve got to make it look good.”

“Are you sure? I mean, weddings cost a lot of money; especially one planned in a week.”

“Well, so what? Now… what’s mine will be yours oh husband of mine,” I joke. Though to me, my words are serious.

He sits down on my bed. “And what’s mine is yours, is that what you’re saying, Brian?”

I laugh. “Yup.”

“I don’t have much,” he whispers. “Just… what I came here with.”

I start to take off my clothes and strip down to my underwear and face him. “I know what you came here with, Justin, and I’ll take it.”

He looks at me for a long time and I let him look at all of me. I want him to see that I’m what he wants and what he needs. He just has to get the fucks over that shit Robbie. Then, then maybe he’ll realize that what I have to offer him is a thousand… no a million times more than Robbie could ever give him.

Justin stands up and he unbuttons his pants. “Is it okay if I sleep in my underwear too?”

I smile. “I’ve seen all of you before.”

He shucks his pants down and then takes off his shirt. “I’m fat now.”

I look at him standing there in only his black briefs and I feel myself wanting to just melt into a fucking puddle, he’s so fucking sexy and he doesn’t even know it. “Do I have to tell you what I think of you again?” I walk over and run my hand down his chest and to his stomach. “This is beautiful… you are beautiful, Justin.”

“Brian?”

“Yeah?” I hold his gaze with my own as his fingers thread over mine.

“I think you’re beautiful too,” he whispers.

I smile at his kindness, take his hand, and help him into my bed. I then go over to my side and crawl in and spoon my body behind his. He likes to lie like this on the couch sometimes and I wonder if he knows how personal this position really is. Friends don’t lie like this with each other. I’m not going to tell him that though. I’ll just hold onto him and be grateful that he allows this.

XXXXX