Title: Christmas Presents…
Story Type: AU
Word Count: 3389
Rating: R, Porn…
Warnings: Passion, Lust, M-Preg…
Beta Queen: BigJ52
Banner: aaa_mazing
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, plot, etc. are property of their respective owners, including, but not limited to Russell T. Davies, Cowlip, and Showtime. The author of this story is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended…
Summary: Saying good bye to Ben, and starting a new life…
Chapter Ten ~ The Circle of Life…
It was cold and damp winter day when we laid Ben to rest. The crowd was somber, most of us still in shock. It happened fast, most of us didn’t even know he was sick. The funeral was well attended, not only our little gang of friends, but with Ben’s students and fellow faculty members. No one really knew what to say, or how to act, everyone grieves in their own way. And Michael was no exception, it hit him hard. For most of their relationship Michael was in denial that Ben was really sick, of course he accepted that he was HIV positive. It just seemed like they’d come so far with new treatments, that no one ever really died anymore. But of course that wasn’t any comfort at a time like this. Michael and Hunter’s lives were now turned upside down. But instead of pulling together, they seemed to be drifting apart.
Brian tried to be there for Michael, tried to lend a helping hand and a shoulder to cry on. But Michael wasn’t having any of that, he just wanted to be left alone. Now angry at the world, he spent most of his time drinking and gambling, staying out late. I guess it was an escape so he didn’t have to deal with reality. After a couple of days Debbie started to become even more concerned, quizzing him when he was around then the two of them just started bumping heads.
She wanted Michael to stay home more to spend time with Hunter. She reassured him that everything was going to be alright, that she was still there for him. But the truth was Michael didn’t seem to least bit interested in what Hunter was feeling. He basically ignored him, focusing on his own loss. He refused to show support, leaving him to flounder on his own. Deb was at her wits’ end trying to get Michael to show Hunter some kindness, knowing how frightened Hunter must be now thinking about his own mortality.
Even in the evenings before he goes to work, Michael’s out at the clubs drowning his sorrows. When he is home, he’s reading comics and surfing the web. He’s distant and removed, snapping at anyone who tries to talk to him. Debbie can’t help but think he might be gambling again, but she just doesn’t have the nerve to ask. She doesn’t want to know if that’s what’s going on.
Michael’s mad because most of Ben’s life insurance is needed to pay his hospital bills. The remainder Ben had earmarked for Hunter, not Michael, which burns Michael up even more. He should be grateful that Brian paid for the funeral but he’s not. It’s like he expected it because everyone knew he didn’t have any money to pay for it. And to make matters worse, if that’s possible, Michael figured since Brian footed the bill for the funeral, then Brian must have forgiven him. So he asked again for his toys and comics back.
When Brian told him he no longer had them, he blew a gasket. He didn’t believe him. Finally he accused him of stealing them and threatened to file a police report. When Brian said he donated them to charity, Michael became enraged. Now realizing that the charity auction was his forfeited treasures, he’s angry with Brian, Emmett and Ted and feels betrayed and used.
Debbie has had enough and as much as she loves her son, she asked him to find someplace else to stay. Even during the best of times they got on each other’s nerves. Now with Michael in a constant bad mood she can’t take anymore. Luckily for Michael, the one-room flat above the bakery is available. His boss agreed to let him live there, reducing his salary to cover the rent. Not that Debbie wasn’t worried about where Michael would go, she’s very grateful that he found some place he can afford.
Hunter moved into Michael’s old room; he agreed to go back to school and Debbie got him a job at the diner, bussing tables. After much discussion, Debbie and Carl completed the multitude of adoption papers for Hunter, foregoing the foster system, making him a permanent member of the family. Michael of course wasn’t pleased; he somehow felt like she chose Hunter over him.
Things happened so quickly just over a span of a week. Brian and Justin couldn’t get out of town quick enough. They wanted to be back on vacation, and away from the madness. But before they returned to Florida, Brian had a few things he needed to take care of. They signed the mortgage papers purchasing the loft below them, and then they met with an architect and drew up plans for remodeling.
They’ll be adding a staircase connecting the floor below, updating the galley kitchen and installing more power points for the computers in their respective offices and the television/gaming system in the family room. Of course there will be a complete remodeling of the master bedroom, and bath. Then the rest of the work is mostly cosmetic, painting everything, setting up a nursery, Gus’s bedroom, Justin’s studio, and Brian’s office. They hope to have everything completed by the time they return from Florida in the middle of February.
Brian had a staff meeting at Kinnetik this morning, so he’s picked up lunch on the way back to the loft. When he comes in he finds Justin sound asleep on the sofa, with Jamie nearby in his bassinette. He remembers how exhausted he used to get when he was pregnant, and he can’t help thinking that Justin looks absolutely adorable when he sleeps. Brian sets the table for lunch, knowing that the smell of Chinese food will pull Justin from his slumber.
It isn’t long before Brian feels Justin’s arm around his waist from behind, resting his head on his shoulder.
“That smells good. Did you get me Moo Shu Pork, and Kung Pao Chicken?”
“Yes, and no. I think the Kung Pao Chicken will be too spicy, and give you heartburn. So I substituted Sesame Chicken, but I did remember the pot stickers, and extra spring rolls.”
“I love you. You’re the best!”
“I know…”
They sit down and enjoy lunch while Brian gives Justin an update on the accounts he’s going to pitch once they’re back in Florida. He tells him that he spoke with Mel and Lindsay and they insisted that Gus stay with them for the next week. You couldn’t really blame them, they need the distraction from all the sadness and chaos. Brian reassures Gus that his mothers just miss him. Then he tells Gus that Jennifer will be bringing him back to Florida next week.
Gus knew that everyone was sad, but he didn’t really understand why. How do you explain to a four year old about death? All he really knew was that Ben wouldn’t be around anymore. It wasn’t like he spent much time around Ben and Michael so he just accepted it without much questioning.
After lunch Brian’s changing Jamie’s diaper when Justin calls out from the bathroom.
“Brian? Are you sick?”
“No. Why?”
“Because there’s a prescription bottle on the counter in here.”
Justin examines the bottle more closely. It’s ‘Wellbutrin’ and it’s prescribed by Dr. Alex Wilder.
“Brian? What’s ‘Wellbutrin’ for? And isn’t Dr. Wilder that shrink you had me talk to after the bashing?”
“Yeah…”
Justin comes out of the bathroom with shaving cream still on his face and the prescription bottle in his hand. He looks at Brian questioningly.
“What’s this about?”
“It’s nothing… It’s just something I started taking after Jamie was born.”
“What’s it for?”
Brian looks down at his feet. Then back up at Justin, looking him straight in the eyes.
“It’s an anti-depressant.”
“Did you have post-partum depression?”
“No. No, nothing like that.”
“Then like what?”
“Why don’t you rinse off your face and we’ll talk about it?”
“Okay.”
A couple of minutes later Justin comes and sits next to Brian on the sofa, taking his hand, looking directly into his eyes.
“So what is this about if it’s not post-partum depression?”
“Post-partum depression is when you have no interest in your baby after their birth. I assure you it was nothing like that. If anything I couldn’t stop holding and fussing over Jamie. I never regretted having Jamie.”
“I know that. So what’s going on?”
“I. I… I had a hard time for a while after Jamie was born. Well, truthfully, before he was born too.”
“Brian?”
“I’m doing much better now. But Alex doesn’t want me to stop taking it yet. And with all the craziness going on right now, I think that’s a good thing.”
“What kind of hard time?”
“I... I just felt alone. I was… I was lonely. I needed you. I was scared I was going to fuck things up. That maybe Mel and Linds were right. Maybe I wouldn’t be a good parent.”
“Brian?”
“I just needed you so badly, and you weren’t around… I asked you to come home for Thanksgiving about a week or so before Jamie was born. And you said no. I was really distraught at the time.”
Justin’s in shock. He remembers now, and he said no because he thought that they might finish up the movie over the next few weeks. It was never because he didn’t want to see Brian.
“Oh God, Brian…”
“Then, then after he was born I asked you to come home for Christmas, and you said no. Again.”
Justin feels sick to his stomach, and not because of his morning sickness.
“Brian? Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I wanted to. But I didn’t want you to only want me because of Jamie. Besides I thought you were in love with Brett. I thought I’d lost you. That you were never coming home again.”
“But, I did come home.”
“I know, but at the time… I was very depressed.”
Justin now has tears streaming down his face, he feels so guilty. He can only imagine how much he hurt Brian. And then there’s that little fact that Brian just admitted that he needed him. He now has his arms around Brian’s neck, kissing him everywhere, whispering over and over.
“I love you. I love you. I love you so much.”
“I know, Sunshine. I know, and I love you too.”
“Oh, Brian...”
More tears, he’s so upset. Now he’s shaking and crying, burying his face into Brian’s chest.
“Hey, hey, hey… No more tears. We’re okay. Justin, we’re okay now. Remember?”
“I just feel so bad.”
“Don’t. Just don’t. Now listen to me. I was going to tell you before you found the prescription bottle that I’ve made an appointment to see Dr. Doug MacDonald today at three pm.”
“Dr. MacDonald? Are you sick? Oh God, Brian, you’re sick?”
“No. No, silly. The appointment is for you.”
“Me? Me? Because I have the flu?”
“No. I don’t think you have the flu. Dr. MacDonald is my obstetrician.”
“Obstetrician?”
“Yes, he specializes in male pregnancies. He’s one of the best physicians in the country.”
“I’m pregnant? I’m pregnant? You think I’m pregnant?”
“Well, I don’t know for sure. But I think it’s a real possibility.”
Justin has now thrown himself into Brian’s arms.
“I’m pregnant! I’m pregnant! Brian, I’m pregnant!”
They both have huge grins on their faces, and Justin can’t stop bouncing up and down, he’s so excited. Then he’s back to kissing Brian everywhere, and of course the tears have returned as well.
“I love you! I love you! I love you! Oh God, Brian, I really love you!”
“I love you too, Sunshine! Now calm down and stop bouncing, or you’re going to lose your lunch.”
It’s almost as if Jamie understood what was going on as he joins in cooing and making little baby squeals from his bassinette.
“Oh my God, Brian. You know what this means? We’re going to have two babies in less than a year.”
“Well, I guess you’re stuck with me now.”
Justin beams, he might actually be glowing.
“Brian, I’ve never been this happy before. I really do love you!”
Brian pulls him back into his arms and kisses him passionately. Looking over Justin’s shoulder into the kitchen he spots the clock on the stove. They need to leave in an hour to make it on time to see Dr. MacDonald. He’s figuring they have time, so he drags Justin into the bedroom to make mad passionate love to him.
Justin’s eyes have now turned a deep sapphire blue, showing so much emotion and desire. His eyes are still watering, overcome with happiness, never expecting things could change so fast. Brian reaches down and wipes his tears away, then he tenderly brushes his hair out of his eyes.
“I don’t think I’ve even seen you look so beautiful before.”
Justin’s smile grows as he blushes, batting his eyelashes, reflecting all his love back at Brian. Brian leans down and gently kisses his lips, watching Justin like he’s seeing him for the first time. Taking in all his splendor he slowly lifts his legs up onto his shoulders. Justin can’t help thinking about the first time they were together. Brian was very gentle with him that night as well.
Justin hands Brian the bottle of lube, and soon feels the gel coating his rosebud. Brian pushes the tip of his finger in and swishes it around, coating him inside while stretching him open. Justin leans his head back, closing his eyes just as Brian enters him, gliding deep into his chasm. Little moans escape from some place deep inside of Justin as he welcomes Brian’s member.
At first everything is in slow motion. They’re both feeling each and every sensation flooding their senses. If Justin didn’t know better he’d be sure that his skin was on fire, as the intensity of each touch burns into his soul. Brian isn’t much better, the warm wetness of Justin’s ravine is welcoming as he slides back and forth.
Justin’s moans have turned to chanting, as their rhythm pulls them both closer to ecstasy. Brian increases his thrusts and is now igniting fireworks throughout them. Their hearts are racing as their pleasure pulsates out to the ends of their toes and fingertips. Brian’s now slamming head-on into Justin’s prostate, making him moan louder and louder. Several more thrusts and Justin’s now climaxing, causing his walls to clench Brian’s cock as they both shoot at the same time.
Justin’s still whimpering as he comes down from his natural high. That’s when they hear Jamie out in the living room squealing and laughing almost as loud as Justin. They both burst out laughing, wondering what he’s up to. Maybe he just doesn’t want to feel left out. It still amazes them what a happy baby he is, and they hope their next one is just like him.
~~~
“Brian, it’s good to see you again, and this must be Justin.”
“Dr. MacDonald, it’s nice to meet you.”
“Now look how Jamie’s grown, he seems to be doing fine.”
“Jamie’s almost perfect. I couldn’t be prouder.”
“As you should be. Now what can I do for you boys today?”
“Well, Justin’s been feeling nauseous. He’s sleeping a lot, exhausted all the time. And I remember from when I first found out I was pregnant, that I experienced very similar symptoms.”
“I see. Is there any reason to expect that he might be pregnant?”
“Well, we stopped using condoms when we got back together a few weeks ago.”
“That would certainly do it. Justin why don’t you give me a urine sample and we’ll do a preliminary test here in the office.”
Justin excuses himself while Dr. MacDonald chats with Brian.
“It’s good to see that the two of you have worked things out. You seem much happier than you did after Jamie was born.”
“You have no idea. I’ve never been this happy before. I guess I didn’t know letting someone into my heart could make you feel so content and alive.”
Justin comes back into the room, and Dr. MacDonald starts giving Justin a basic examination checking his pulse, heartbeat, reflexes and lungs. In the meantime the nurse returns with the results of Justin’s urine test.
“Well Mr. Taylor, I have great news. Your test came back positive. I’m sure Brian can give you all the books, and literature I gave him to read. I’ll want to see you monthly for the first few months, and then more frequently.”
Justin’s all smiles, almost in a daze, taking in all the information Dr. MacDonald is giving him. Brian’s just as happy, smiling like the proud father he is. Dr. MacDonald gives them the okay to travel, and schedules Justin next appointment when they return from Florida. He tells them to call if they have any more questions, or if problems arise.
They get to the car and strap Jamie into his travel seat. Then Brian pushes Justin against the car, holding him tight. He kisses him deeply, letting all his emotions take over. Finally breaking for air they lean their foreheads together whispering, ‘I love yous’ to one another. Finally the cold weather pulls them apart as they seek the warmth of the car.
“Justin. Let’s hold off telling everyone about this for a while. I don’t want to send them all over the edge.”
“Yeah. I understand. Lindsay’s head is going to explode when she finds out.”
“That, and… Well, something might happen. Not that I really think anything will but it’s not unusual. Sometimes things happen.”
“Brian. Nothing is going to happen. Trust me. I’m going to be super protective of our baby. Extra careful, with everything I do.”
“I know you are, Sunshine.”
“Our baby… OUR BABY, God, I love how that sounds.”
“Me too…”
“I’m kind of starving.”
“Why don’t I doubt that? You’re always hungry.”
“Let’s go to the diner. It will give us one last chance to see Deb before we go back to Florida.”
“You just want a greasy hamburger and fries.”
“Don’t forget my chocolate milkshake.”
“Never…”
“Ah, there’s my Sweet Baby James!”
“Deb, can you take our order then hold him?”
“Keep your pants on. I just want to say hello to my grandson.”
“You’re just getting coffee?
“Sunshine, I don’t have your metabolism. I can’t eat like a horse and still look like a pony.”
“So what will it be? The usual?”
“Actually, I’ve changed my mind. I want blueberry pancakes, and lots of maple syrup.”
“Of course you do.”
“Brian. Don’t make fun of him. He’s still a growing boy.”
Brian grins. “In more ways than you know.”
Justin kicks him under the table. But it went completely over Deb’s head, not knowing what Brian was referring to.
“So do you have most everything packed and ready to go?”
“Mostly. I didn’t really get anything done when you went to Kinnetik this morning. But there isn’t that much to pack, since we didn’t bring much back with us.”
They said their good-byes to Deb, hugging her and telling her to call if anything happens. They make their way out of the diner and return to the loft. Brian ends up packing everything they’ll need, while Justin plays with Jamie and lounges around on the bed watching Brian. Their plane doesn’t leave until the next morning but Brian likes to be prepared, not leaving anything to the last minute.
~~~
It was a whirlwind going to Pittsburgh, and then back to Clearwater. They’re both still a little sad, but it feels good being back on vacation. They couldn’t believe all the commotion happening back on the home front.
It seems too quiet with Gus gone but it lets Brian get more work done on the campaigns he wants to pitch this next week. Justin’s happily playing peek-a-boo with Jamie, and painting while he’s asleep. Just as I suspected he started painting pink flamingoes, mixing the colors to capture the tones just right. When he’s not painting he’s reading the stack of books recommended by Dr. MacDonald. He has a lot of questions, but that’s to be expected. He’s always been curious about how everything works, and his pregnancy is no exception.
TBC…
