JUSTIN

I was ordering dinner for everyone when Kyle walks in. I know we’ve been running him around in circles with the conversations, but he’s gay so why does he need to interview us? I know he’s been able to get some information from the guys, but we don’t know how to stay on topic.

“Kyle, how's it been going?” I ask him.

“Well if you want the truth, you guys can be exhausting. I come here with every intention of asking questions, but then it’s like a circus, you have to look everywhere to see something.” Poor guy.

“Well, I have a few minutes, ask a question.” I tell him.

“Why do you avoid interviews?” Kyle asks me.

“I don’t get why anyone cares about me. People want to look at my paintings, not find out that today Elle wants to be a comic hero, or why Brian and I don’t get married.” Justin tells me.

“I think it’s the fact that you seem mysterious.” Kyle tells me.

“No real mystery, I’m a father, Brian’s partner and a painter. My father disowned me for being gay, then divorced my mother when she wouldn’t support him over me. I met Brian and we had fun, then we had issues with commitment. Me thinking I needed him to say ‘I love you’, him showing me he loved me the only way he knew how. We got back together, he was willing to marry me. We didn’t because I was too young and had a future I needed to explore. Brian and I made the relationship work. That’s it, nothing all that exciting about it.” I tell him.

“I think you left off the part where you showed Brian you weren’t going to kiss his ass to keep him.” Emmett tells Justin.

KYLE

Oh God, here we go again.

“Justin kisses my ass all the time.” Brian tells Emmett.

“Where are the kids?” Justin asks Brian.

“Mother Taylor and Deb just showed up. Deb has some dresses to show you Emmett. You could be the prettiest bride this year.” Brian tells Emmett.

“At least I would look good in a dress, you don’t have the ass for it.” Emmett tells Brian.

“Justin definitely has the ass for it.” Ted tells us.

“Ted, is there some reason your looking at Justin’s ass?” Brian glares at Ted.

“Brian, there isn’t a gay man alive who hasn’t snuck a peek at Justin ass.” Blake tells Brian. Wow, they really want to die today.

“Well there isn’t anyone who hasn’t tried to see Brian naked either.” Michael tells us.

“Coming from the biggest peeker in the group.” Ted tells us.

“Hey, I stopped when I met Ben.” Michael tells them.

“I would have stopped too, if I met Ben first.” Justin smirks at Brian.

“Well I did for a night at the White Party.” Brian tells us. What?

“Well, he didn’t seem to want you after he met me.” Michael tells him.

“Mikey, I wasn’t available anymore.” Brian tells him.

“You mean you admit you and Justin were in a relationship? Out loud?” Emmett ask.

“Okay queens, listen carefully, he lived in my loft, slept with me regularly, and we were together most of the time. What does that sound like?” Brian says slowly.

“Well you were always telling everyone ‘there’s no locks on our doors’ what were we supposed to think?” Michael tells him.

“Well, I was hoping you would all just mind your own business.” Brian tells him.

“At the time, it was like watching a soap opera.” Ted tells us.

“I refused to be ‘Gay as Blazes’, and let’s face it, at eighteen, locking any door would have ended our relationship.” Justin tells them.

“It happened anyway when the fiddler came along.” Michael tells everyone.

“It might not have if someone could have minded his own business.” Justin tells Michael.

“Brian’s my best friend and I owed it to him to tell him. I don’t care what you say, if some guy was cheating on Daphne, you would have told her.” Michael tells Justin.

“I would have also told Brian what Justin was telling you when you two wrote the comic. You could have saved me the headache of watching you run around ‘being there’ for Brian.” Ben tells Michael.

“I didn’t like Justin at the time, because he was cheating.” Michael justifies it.

“I never could figure out how you cheated in an open relationship.” Ted adds.

“Justin needed to try out other relationships. Did I like it? No. Was I jealous? Yes, I admit it. Would Michael telling me about Justin’s issues about our relationship help? No, because I was an asshole and didn’t want to care. There you have it, any other questions girls?” Brian asks them.

“Is it true you hired an escort that looked like Justin?” Emmett asks. Brian flips him off.

I came in to ask Justin questions, and are you seeing the minefield these guys put you through?

“Pop, the kids are complaining they’re hungry.” Gus walks by me. Did he just rub my ass? Gus smiles at me.

“You mean you're hungry.” Michael says to Gus.  

“Sure, if Kyle wants to help me pick some ingredients in the pantry.” Gus tells Michael.

“Brian, your kid is trying to trick in the pantry.” Michael shouts.

“Gus, not around the food.” Brian tells him. Um, don’t encourage the kid.

“How about the pool house?” Gus asks me. Can’t they change the topic.

“Gus, how about no.” Justin, the voice of reason.

“What, I have to wait until I turn seventeen to make out with an older man?” Gus asks Justin.

“How about you look for someone your own age. I didn’t just say that.” Justin turns around and hugs Brain.

“Oh my God, you turned into your parents, Justin.” Michael starts laughing.

“Well, you know parents are supposed to stop all your fun, so Pop is on right on track. Michael you should tell Jenny that wearing a cheerleaders outfit doesn’t mean to flash the football players.” Gus tells Michael.

“JENNY REBECCA NOVOTNY MARCUS GET YOUR ASS IN HERE.” Michael says as he runs out of the room.

“Really Gus.” Justin tells him and follows behind Michael. There is a mass exodus from the room. I guess we all want to see Michael explode.

I was going to follow when Gus cages me in the chair. He starts sniffing my neck and God I need to get out of here.

“If I have to wait, make sure you wait for me.” Gus whispers to me. “Ouch Pop.” Justin came in and grabs his ear.

“Do not use the Kinney powers on poor Kyle.” Justin takes Gus with him. I sit there and realize Justin never stood a chance if Brian was anything like Gus.

“Dad, I do not flash the football players, I don’t care what Gus told you.” Jenny is whining like her father.

“I think I should talk to your coach about longer skirts and maybe a sweater instead of those tiny shirts.” Michael tells her.

“Michael your kid is never going to get la… to talk if you dress her like a nun.” Brian tells him.

“My Honeybun needs to stay innocent, till she get’s married.” Michael tells him.

“Yeah, like you did, right?” Emmett yells out.

“We are not talking about me, we’re talking about my little girl.” Michael tells him.

“Jenny, your dad did wait until Uncle Brian had to find him a date.” Ted tells her.

“OKAY, I DO FLIPS AND CARTWHEELS, MY SKIRT CAN NOT DEFEAT GRAVITY, SO OF COURSE YOU SEE THE BOTTOMS DESIGNED TO GO WITH THE OUTFIT. NOT MY GOODIES, AS MY NOW DEAD BROTHER IS TRYING TO TELL YOU, DAD.” Jenny shouts at Michael.

“Why didn’t you just say that.” Michael tells her. Jenny looks at her father and throws her hands in the air.

“Pop, after I kill Gus will you help me hide the body?” Jenny ask Justin.

I guess Gus thought we should die together because he turned around and planted a kiss on me. Then ran into the house. I looked at the guys.

“Sorry about the boy, we tried to keep him from becoming his Pop.” Brian tells me.

“Excuse me, but you know I was just standing at the street light minding my own business, you're the one who abandoned all your friends to chase me.” Justin tells Brian.

“You looked so innocent, I had to change that.” Brian says that and they both start inhaling each other.

“Brian, could you let Justin breathe.” Michael looks at them.

“Hey guys, not that we don’t enjoy the show, but there are kids present.” Ted tries.

“Brian, you know, you guys have a bedroom.” Emmett puts in.

They finally come up for air. Brian is staring into Justin’s eyes.

“Marry me.” Brian says.

“Marry me.” Justin says.

We all becoming crying queens on the patio.