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Title: The Offer Still Stands…
Story Type: AU
Word Count: 7316
Rating: R, Porn…
Warnings: Anti-Michael, Passion and Lust…
Beta Queen: bigj52
Summary: Some promises are just made to be broken…
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, plot, etc. are property of their respective owners, including, but not limited to Russell T. Davies, Cowlip, and Showtime. The author of this story is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended…
The Offer Still Stands…
Chapter 23 ~ Broken Promises…
Justin’s POV
I’m still a little shocked that Brian forgave Lindsay so easily as it’s so out of character for him. Now I’m just keeping my fingers crossed that Lindsay follows through on all her promises. I’m not sure how I feel about her being back in town, she really burnt a lot of bridges leaving the way she did. She’d better keep her distance from Gus and not pull another stunt trying to manipulate the teachers at his school. I really don’t want Gus to get hurt by her again because she has so many problems right now. I guess I just don’t trust her. Part of me wants to keep him home from school today, but I know I’m just over-reacting. Brian plans to talk with Gus’s principal when he drops him off this morning, so I guess they’ll keep an eye out for Lindsay, just in case.
I can’t seem to focus on my reading, so I leave the house a little early and stop by the art supply store on the way. I need to stock up on canvases and paints. I have several paintings due in the next couple of weeks and I need to get started on them. I sit and sketch a few ideas in the student lounge as I wait for class to start. I look up and see Matthew headed straight for me, we both have art history together. He’s nice enough but I’m afraid he has a crush on me. He always seems to seek me out, bringing me cookies and brownies from the cafeteria to share while we review the reading assignment for class.
“Hey, Justin. I knew I’d find you here. Did you finish reading all the chapters for our lecture today?”
The truth is I was just scanning them. Art history is one of those classes I dropped after the Stockwell fiasco. So most of the class so far has been a rehash of what I’ve already learned.
“Yeah, I’m just reviewing them now before class. I have a feeling that Professor Stabler is going to call on me. He always does when he thinks I haven’t done the homework.”
“But you always do the homework. You’re like the smartest one in the class.”
“Hardly, but thanks for the compliment.”
He’s restless and keeps shuffling his feet, and glancing at me. God, I just know he’s leading up to something. All of a sudden there’s students walking to and from all the buildings, cutting through the student lounge. Classes have just been let out and we need to get going towards the auditorium.
“Oh here, I almost forgot. I got you a glazed doughnut when I was in the cafeteria.”
Of course he did. “Thanks Matt, you know that’s not necessary.”
“I know, but I wanted to. Listen, I was hoping that maybe you’d want to go see the new exhibit at the Bloom Gallery sometime?”
“Oh… Ah… Maybe…”
I know I should have just told him no, that I’m married. But you’d think he’d figure it out. After all I am wearing a wedding band.
~~~
Lindsay slept in late this morning, and she’s hoping that both Deb and Carl have already left for work as she makes her way downstairs. She’s waiting for the coffee to finish brewing, contemplating what she wants to do with her life. Sitting at the kitchen table looking around at Deb’s house, she thinks to herself that this place really is a dump. She’s startled when she hears someone come through the front door.
“Deb, I’m back! Debbie, are you here?”
Emmett comes into the kitchen and is totally surprised to see Lindsay sitting there.
“Oh my God, Lindsay! What a surprise!”
“Em, hi. How was your trip? I heard that you went to Puerto Rico.”
“It was fabulous! Ben and I had a great time, the only problem is that it went by too fast.”
They both look at each other, not really knowing what else to say to each other.
“So you’re here for a visit?”
“Yeah, something like that.”
“Well… That’s just wonderful, it’s so good to see you.”
The last thing she wants to do is to have to explain things to Emmett. She stands up.
“I was just about to take a shower, we’ll talk later.”
Emmett hugs her, agreeing to catch up on everything later. She takes her cup of coffee and heads upstairs. Em, of course, wonders what’s going on, so as soon as she’s out of ear shot he calls Teddy to get the low down. He sits there nodding, amazed at the interesting situation unfolding. It’s almost noon so they decide the meet up at the diner and continue this conversation. After all, Em is the gossip queen and he hates being in the dark on such a juicy story.
~~~
After Brian’s staff meeting he left the office telling Cynthia that he didn’t know when he’d be back. To only call him if it was an emergency. If something comes up he’s sure that her and Ted can handle it. It was a long drive out to the Allegheny State prison, which gave Brian time to think. Time to contemplate what it was he wanted and needed to say to Michael. He wasn’t sure he was ready to be as forgiving as he was with Lindsay, not even sure he should have done that. But he needed answers. He needed to understand why Michael did the things he did. Hopefully Michael had had enough time to consider his actions, and come to grips with what he had done.
It’s a sunny spring day, with just a little crispness in the air. Brian sits at a small cement table and bench, thinking to himself that they must make them out of concrete so the inmates can’t use them as weapons against each other or the guards. He lights a cigarette, taking a nice long draw, letting the smoke fill his lungs He hopes that it will calm him while he waits for Michael. Finally he looks up as Michael calls his name.
“Brian! Oh my God, I’ve missed you so much!”
He rushes over to Brian, ready to throw his arms around him, but Brian steps back and the prison guard hollers at Michael to step away from his visitor. Michael’s dressed in grey cotton pants and shirt, looking like a doctor wearing scrubs before surgery.
“Brian. I’m so glad you’re here. I’ve missed you so much.”
“To tell you the truth, Michael, I was skeptical about coming to visit you. I wasn’t sure how you were doing.”
“I’m great now that you’re here. But Brian, promise me that you’ll talk to the judge and withdraw this stupid lawsuit against me.”
“I can’t do that, Michael.”
“Why not? I know you never meant for me to go to prison.”
“Michael, please stop! I’m here more for me than I am for you. I need to understand why you did what you did. I just can’t understand why you would be so vindictive.”
“I didn’t really do anything all that bad. I just busted up a few things.”
“What? Is that what you really think?”
“Well… Yeah…”
“No. No, Michael! You destroyed my loft. Mine and Justin’s home. Do you need me to remind you?”
“It wasn’t that bad. Besides, it’s not like you couldn’t afford to replace everything.”
Brian just shakes his head.
“Can you hear yourself, Michael?”
“Let’s not talk about all that. Let’s talk about us, our future.”
“Let’s not… I need you to understand that what you did hurt me. You hurt our friendship. I thought that maybe I’d be able to forgive you, if you could just explain to me why you did it.”
“I was angry. That’s all.”
“That’s all you’re going to say? You were angry?”
“What more is there?”
“Michael, you’re not a petulant child throwing a temper tantrum. You destroyed practically everything I own. My clothes, dishes, computer, stereo, furniture, Justin’s paintings and so much, much more. Not to mention that now Justin fears for his life, he’s had nightmares for months. He still gets freaked out if he thinks something’s out of place, or not where he left it.”
“Justin! Justin! Justin! Fuck Justin!”
“Michael! Justin is my husband!”
“Your husband? How long do you think that will last? You know he’ll just end up leaving you again. Do you really think he’ll put up with your tricking forever? Besides, what about us?”
“Us???”
“Yes! What about us? You know when I’m released, I was thinking that maybe we could get married in Hawaii. I hear it’s beautiful there.”
Brian feels like he’s in the twilight zone. Michael is completely in denial, completely insane. He now knows that whatever answers he thought Michael could give him, was just wishful thinking.
“Michael. Listen. Are you listening to me?”
“Yes. Yes, of course.”
Michael grins back at him all dreamy eyed. Like he thinks Brian’s going to profess his love for him.
“Justin and I are married. He’s the only man I’ll ever marry. We love each other. That’s never going to change.”
“No, Brian. You love me, remember… Always have, always will…”
Brian stands, shaking his head. “You really do have emotional issues. Michael, please let the doctors here help you. Get the treatment you so desperately need, so you can finally accept reality.”
“Brian. I’m not sick. That’s why you have to get me released. So we can be together. I love you so much.”
“I’m leaving now, Michael. Please continue your therapy sessions and medication. Please try to see reality.”
“Brian! Brian, will you come back tomorrow? I need to see you again.”
“No, Michael. I won’t be back.”
As Brian walks away he can still hear Michael calling after him. Asking him when he’ll see him again. Brian can’t help thinking. Never. You’ll never see me again. I don’t even know who you are anymore.
~~~
Lindsay feels much better after a long hot shower. It gave her time to think and now that her head is clearer she knows she can’t stay here. She really is grateful that Brian took pity on her, forgiving her for all the trouble she caused. But she’s feeling antsy hanging out at Deb’s, so she decides to go over to the house. When she gets there she is inundated with all kinds of memories, some wonderful and others not so much. She’s humiliated now, having come back here to Pittsburgh, trying to live her old life again. Now she knows she’s not interested in returning to the past. She pulls out her fifth of vodka from her tote bag as she slides down the wall, ready to cry at what a mess her life has become.
She remembers when they bought the house, they weren’t even sure they could afford it. They both had just graduated, and at that time she actually thought that she might be able to become an artist. Looking at it now she realizes what a pipe dream that was. She never had the talent or patience to commit to such an arduous career. It took time and persistence. You really have to have a strong ego to put up with all the rejection and naysayers. Unless you have a strong support system, and someone to foot the bill, it really is the life of a starving artist.
Yes, she was envious and jealous of Justin. He really had talent, and then there is the fact that Brian loves and supports him. She can’t help wondering if things had worked out differently, would she actually have had a chance at being famous. As much as she hates to admit it she knows she never did. Her painting and drawing were mediocre at best.
Even the artwork she does in her studio in Paris isn’t worthy of hanging in any art gallery, let alone a museum. She wants to blame it on Mel. If she had just stuck with it, even gone to New York like she always dreamed of, maybe she could have apprenticed with a local artist and had hands-on instruction, and her talent would have blossomed. But she committed herself to a relationship, thinking that Mel would someday be a renowned attorney, being able to support her in the lifestyle in which she was raised.
And now here she sits in an empty house, face-to-face with her failed relationship. She’s resentful and frustrated. She never thought that Mel would have hooked back up with Leda. Leda, really! She’s just so, so crass, so biker-chick like, and uncouth. In the back of her mind she always thought that she could come back to Mel and all would be forgiven. Now she’s angry about that too. Not to mention the idea of having to live in this shoebox of a house, and then there’s the fact that everyone knows about their breakup.
After walking through the house, realizing that this isn’t her life anymore, she has a few more swallows from her bottle and goes back to her rental car. At first she was just going to drive by Gus’s school. Maybe he’ll be out on the playground. She just wants to see him, even if it’s only from a distance. She sits in her car watching and waiting, but there’s no sign of him. It’s almost lunchtime and she’s sure she’ll see him then. Surely he must come out to play during that time.
The vodka is starting to take effect as she’s feeling mellow and thoughts are forming in her head. Maybe she could take Gus for the afternoon. No one would notice and she’d be able to explain to him why she had to leave, maybe he’d even want to come live with her. She leans out the window, trying to see if she recognizes him, but it’s hard for her to distinguish him from the other students.
She now moves up to the chain-link fence that surrounds the playground. She still can’t see him and she’s becoming even more frustrated. She’s half in the bushes, trying to climb up a little into the tree next to her when she feels a hand on her thigh.
“Excuse me, Ma’am. May I ask what you’re doing?”
Lindsay looks down at the security guard, glaring at him like he’s a piece of garbage, or an ant that needs to be crushed.
“I’m just looking for my son.”
“May I ask why you didn’t just come inside the school and have him brought down to the principal’s office?”
Lindsay’s mind is working a mile a minute. But she can’t think of anything to say.
The security guard asks her to please come down out of the tree. That’s when she realizes that she looks ridiculous hanging onto the branches and the fence. He helps her down and asks her name.
“I’m Mrs. Brian Kinney. Would you please get my son for me?”
“Mrs. Kinney. Are you drunk?”
Lindsay blushes, she didn’t know her breath was so strong. Now she realizes that she’s been caught. She pushes the security guard away and takes off towards her car. In her rush to get away she runs a stop sign. Her brakes squeal and then she hits the children in the crosswalk. She never even slowed down but just sped off towards Debbie’s house.
Once back at Deb’s house she’s grateful she had another bottle of vodka in her room. She’s rattled and needs something to calm her nerves. Now sitting on the bed she takes several long swallows of the burning liquor. She’s feeling trapped, this is the last place she wants to be. Her mind drifts back to yesterday when Brian was holding her in his arms, she felt so safe and loved. Now if she could have Brian in her life the way she wants him, life would be perfect. She’s always carried a torch for him, but she knows he never loved her that way.
She really is a snob these days. She’s become accustomed to living a very glamorous lifestyle, and moving back to the Pitts just isn’t her style. She doesn’t want to come back here to her mundane life, and now she’s in trouble after leaving the scene of an accident. She can’t believe that those children just jumped out in front of her car. Didn’t they know better?
The truth is she likes her life in Paris. She likes being the wife of a famous artist. So their marriage isn’t perfect. Her and Sam fought and argued, but didn’t all married couples? Everyone in Paris was just so much more cosmopolitan. No one seemed to judge you. She was free to pursue her own artwork, or travel, and of course to have sexual encounters at will. She realizes that she’s not willing to give up her glamorous lifestyle, attending parties, and hobnobbing with the elite.
She told Brian yesterday that she didn’t want her father’s money, that she might put it in a trust for Gus for when he’s older. But in the light of day, she has no intention of giving up half a million dollars. That kind of money will allow her to continue living the lifestyle that she’s become accustomed to. Of course she’ll keep it in the bank account under her name only. No need to tell Sam about what she now considers her inheritance.
She checks her cell phone for messages, and there’s several from Leslie. She’s in New York and has invited Lindsay to the opening of an art exhibit at a little gallery in Soho. This is the perfect escape, because soon the police will probably track her down. Leslie’s message goes on explaining that there’s a party afterwards, then her and their friend Fran want her to fly with them to Monte Carlo for a week of sunbathing and cocktail parties. Leslie mentions that Sam will be meeting up with them there, and then he wants to spend a week in Barcelona before returning home.
Yes, this is the lifestyle she wants to live, and why shouldn’t she? She was raised to be privileged, to live a prestigious life free of everyday worries. Yes, she deserves a better life, and she has every intention of living her life to the fullest. What did she care what other people thought of her? Maybe she was self-centered and spoiled, but wasn’t that the life everybody wanted?
She’s relieved that Emmett isn’t back yet. So she leaves the rental car parked several blocks away and calls a taxi. After packing all her belongings into the trunk, her first stop is to FedEx to ship her boxes to Paris. Then she’s off to the airport, and then New York to make a clean break.
~~~
Brian sits in his car with his head against the steering wheel, wishing things had gone differently. He can’t believe that Michael has totally lost touch with reality. He wonders if this is somehow all his fault. He misses Michael, he misses his best friend. But this Michael he doesn’t even recognize. It scares him what could have possibly happened, if Justin had been at the loft when Michael exploded, destroying everything in his path.
He puts the Mercedes in gear and starts to head home. His conversation with Michael plays over and over again in his head. Even though Michael and Pierre are both in prison, he makes a mental note to upgrade the security at home and at Kinnetik. He doesn’t want any possibility of another intruder. He’s brought out of his mulling as he answers his cell phone.
He checks the caller ID and sees that it’s Deb. “Hey, Deb, how’s everything on the home front? Is Lindsay settling in?”
“No, Brian. Lindsay went out. She left me a note saying she’s meeting a friend. She said she didn’t know when she’d be back.”
“She’s a grown woman, Deb. I wouldn’t worry about her.”
“But that’s just it, Brian. I am worried about her. Everything’s missing from her room. Her suitcase and all those boxes from Mel’s basement.”
“Well, maybe she moved everything back to the house. Maybe she’s out buying furniture?”
“I don’t think so, Brian. I have a bad feeling about all this.”
“That’s what mothers do, Deb, they worry. I’ll tell you what, I’ll stop by her house on the way home and see if she’s there. Okay? Will that satisfy your curiosity?”
“Alright. I’ll be waiting for your call.”
Brian grits his teeth, the last thing he needs right now is to have to fix another problem. He notices he has several messages on his phone so he listens to them. There’s one from Cynthia, asking when he’ll be back in the office. One from Ted, wondering where he is and if he wants to meet up at Woody’s for a drink. Apparently Emmett’s back and excited about his vacation, having lots of stories to tell. The next one is from Gus’s principal, asking him to call as soon as possible. That it’s an emergency.
The next one’s from the police department, saying that his wife was in an accident and to call them immediately. There’s another message from Ted. He’s really concerned now. The police were at Kinnetik, looking for him, but wouldn’t say why.
Brian calls the school, worried that something has happened to Gus. As he waits to be connected to her, he wonders what the police meant by ‘his wife.’ He has no idea what’s going on, and hopes that everything’s alright with Justin.
“Mr. Taylor-Kinney. Thank you for getting back to me.”
“Is Gus alright? Has something happened to him? Is Justin there with him?”
“Mr. Taylor-Kinney. Gus is just fine, and yes, Justin Taylor-Kinney has picked him up already.”
“Thank goodness. I was worried he might have been hurt. The police left a message about an accident. What’s happened?”
“Someone was lurking around the playground. When the security guard questioned her, she said she was your wife.”
“You know that’s not possible. I’m married to Justin, my husband.
“I understand, Mr. Kinney. I mean Mr. Taylor-Kinney. The security guard described a woman that sounds like Lindsay Peterson. He said she appeared drunk.”
“Oh God! That just what I need right now, and please call me Brian.”
“It seems in her haste to leave quickly, Lindsay wasn’t paying attention. She ran a stop sign, and unfortunately hit several children in the crosswalk.”
“Oh my God! Please tell me they’re alright.”
“I wish I could. But that’s not the case. They’ve been taken to the hospital, and we can’t give out any other information until their parents have been notified.”
Brian’s heart sank. Just what has Lindsay done? Why didn’t she stop and help them? He can’t understand her behavior. He can hear a beep in the background, letting him know he has another call. But he lets it roll to voice mail as he continues his call with the principal.
“Brian, do you know what car Lindsay is driving? The security guard only got the first couple of numbers on the license plate. And all he remembers is that it was a white SUV. But he can’t remember what make and model it was.”
“No, I don’t. She must have rented a car today. She didn’t have one yesterday.”
“The police are still here. They hoped you could come by and talk with them about what’s happened? Maybe help them locate her?”
“Yes. Yes, of course. Do you know how long ago Justin left with Gus?”
“Just about fifteen minutes ago. He thought that it was best that Gus not know what was going on. He didn’t want to upset or worry him.”
“Okay. I’m on my way now. I’ll call Justin and makes sure Gus is alright.”
Of course it was Justin leaving a message letting him know that he’s taken Gus to Deb’s. He talked with Deb a few minutes ago and knows that Lindsay has already cleared out of Deb’s house. There was one more message that came in and it was from Lindsay, or should he say Wendy.
“Peter. I’m so sorry. Please forgive me. I do appreciate everything you did yesterday. But it just doesn’t feel right being here in Pittsburgh. I know you won’t understand, but I just can’t stay. This isn’t my home anymore. Please tell Gus that I love him. I doubt that I’ll ever be back in Pittsburgh again. Please don’t hate me. I’m just not the person I used to be.”
Brian’s stunned. Sure he knew it was going to be hard for her rebuilding her life here, but he never expected her to just up and leave again. Especially after causing an accident involving children. He’s truly shocked. He thought she was stronger than this. It seems he really doesn’t know who she is anymore either. He tries her cell phone, but gets a message that this number is no longer in service.
He calls Justin who’s playing with Gus at Deb’s house. Gus seems clueless to what’s going on with the adults around him. Both Justin and Deb are shocked by Lindsay’s behavior. Deb’s in the other room calling Carl, hoping that he can find her before things get worse.
Brian and Carl show up at the school at the same time. They talk with the police officers on the scene and Gus’s principal to get a better picture of what’s happened this afternoon. Carl has the officers start checking with the local car rental agencies to find out what make and model car she rented and get the full license plate number. Hopefully the car is equipped with GPS and they’ll be able to track its whereabouts.
Brian feels better now that Carl is on the case. They both go back to Deb’s to see if Lindsay left any clues as to where she’s gone. Of course Deb feeds everyone, and then offers to watch Gus while Brian and Justin go to Woody’s to have a drink and unwind with the boys. On the way there Brian comments on what a stressful day it’s been and how the people you think you know the best, turn out to be someone completely different. There’s something about the way he said it, that made Justin think he meant more than just Lindsay.
Justin accepts the beer that Brian sets down in front of him. He doesn’t want to push, he knows that Brian will talk about it when he’s ready. Meanwhile Emmett comes over and gives Justin a big hug, kissing him on the cheek. Telling him how much he missed him, even if it’s only been a week.
“Em!”
“Brian, it’s just a little hug. Nothing to be so grouchy about.”
“Go find Professor Beefcakes if you need a hug.”
“Oh God, I’ve got so much to tell all of you about our vacation. But first let’s hear all the gossip about Lindsay.”
“Oh God. Where do I start?”
“Well, Ted gave me the lowdown at lunch about the scene at the courthouse, and you forgiving her. I can hardly believe that you did that.”
“Yeah, well, I shouldn’t have. She doesn’t deserve it. I’d like to say I got played, and who knows, maybe I was. It’s just that when I saw her in tears, and her bitch of a mother reaming her out, I thought she needed her family, her real family.”
“Brian. Don’t let her upset you. Just because you treated her like a good friend, like family, it isn’t your fault that she’s made such bad decisions today.”
Brian looks at Justin, still amazed that he is always so full of love. He wraps his arm around his waist and pulls him closer, kissing the top of his head.
Emmett continues. “When I talked to Deb a few minutes ago she was in a tizzy. But she couldn’t talk about it because she was watching Gus for the evening.”
Brian catches Emmett up on the events of the day, and Lindsay’s disappearing act. Emmett shakes his head, thinking back to this morning, wondering if he missed any clues in her behavior. But he doesn’t come up with anything, except that he was shocked to find her at Deb’s to begin with. They’re on their second beer when Brian gets a call from Carl. They’ve found Lindsay’s rental car a few blocks from Deb’s and it appears to have been there all afternoon. She parked in a no parking zone, and it has received several tickets throughout the afternoon.
Justin gets up to use the bathroom. As he makes his way to the back of the bar he sees Matthew playing pool. Justin smiles and continues towards the restroom. Matthew reaches out and grabs his hand. Several of the regulars at Woody’s watch the exchange, but they’re not the only ones eyeing the exchange.
“Justin. It’s great to see you here. Come here often?”
Justin groans inwardly at the clichéd pick-up line. He almost feels sorry for Matt and he knows he has to nip this in the bud before it gets out of hand. He just hates having these conversations, and he remembers how horrible he was to the guy he met at Daph’s party.
“Actually I do. My friends like to play pool and have a few drinks while we’re catching up with one another.”
“Have you thought anymore about going to the gallery together?”
Justin cringes as Matt struggles trying to ask him out.
“I was hoping after seeing the exhibit, maybe we could get something to eat. What do you think?”
“Oh, thanks for asking. But I already have plans.”
Justin hoped that he would have just let it drop, but no such luck.
“How about another night? I’ll take you to dinner anywhere you like.”
“Matt, that’s really sweet. But I can’t.”
“Why? Is it because of that older guy who was kissing you at the bar?”
“Yes. My husband frowns on me going out with other men.”
He looks crushed. He can see the anger in his eyes as he checks out his left hand. There’s an edge to his voice, and the sarcasm isn’t hard to miss.
“I never noticed that you wore a wedding band before. It looks expensive. Is that platinum?”
“Yeah. Nothing but the best for my husband,” escapes his lips before he has a chance to stop himself. He didn’t want to come off as being arrogant.
“I guess I should get back to my pool game.”
He smiles, trying to break the tension. “I’ll see you in class.”
He feels horrible. He thinks he should have found a way to let him know he was married, without being so blatant. When he gets back to the bar he notices that Matt isn’t the only one being curt with him.
“Who was that? Another one of your secret admirers?”
“Just some kid from art history class.”
He gets on his tip toes and wraps his arms around Brian’s neck, giving him butterfly kisses until he kisses him back. He’s now showing more passion as his lips become more dominant.
Ted mumbles, “Oh God. They’re going to do it right here on the bar.”
“Theodore. Just because your steady Eddie is out of town, that’s no reason to be so grumpy.”
Emmett gushes, “I think it’s romantic. It’s obvious just how much you two love each other.”
Justin’s all smiles, then he remembers. “Oh, Emmett. We’ve decided to move our reception dinner to June instead of August.”
Now Emmett’s happy, bouncing and clapping. “It’s about time. You got married on Valentine’s Day!”
“Well, I thought that I wanted to wait. You know, not compete with Deb and her big day.”
“Deb hasn’t even set a date yet. I think she’s been waiting, hoping that maybe Michael might be able to get a day pass so he can attend.”
Brian snarks, “That’s not going to happen!”
Everyone looks at him, wondering why he’s seems so upset at the mention of Michael. Usually about this time Brian would suggest that they play a few games of pool. But it’s obvious that it’s the last place he wants to be. He drains his beer bottle and then takes Justin’s hand.
“Well, it’s been fun boys, but some of us have to be at work early tomorrow morning.”
On the ride home Brian is unusually quiet. Justin reaches over and puts his hand on Brian’s thigh. He knows that it helps calm his husband.
“Please don’t worry, there’s nothing we can do but wait. I’m sure they’ll find her. I just hopes she has a valid reason for everything that’s happened.”
“Yeah. Sure. Like she’s too chicken shit to take responsibility for her actions.”
“Brian. Please try not to let her upset you.”
“It’s not just her. It’s Michael too.”
Justin takes a deep breath, he knew there was more going on inside that Kinney brain of his.
Brian sighs. “I know now that I shouldn’t have gone to see Michael today. I just really hoped that he was somehow getting better. That he’d have some kind of answers for me. Like why he destroyed the loft.”
“That must have been hard for you to see him in jail, after all this time.”
“At first, maybe. But as the conversation progressed it became obvious that it’s exactly where he belongs. Not only does he not feel bad about it, he doesn’t think he did anything wrong.”
“I’m sorry, Brian. I know how disappointed you must be.”
“It’s not just that. It’s that he doesn’t acknowledge reality. He started talking about being released. Like I somehow could get his sentence reduced. Which is ridiculous. I mean, what power do I have?”
“Please try not to let him upset you.”
“It’s more than just that, so much more… He wanted to talk about later. When he gets out, how we were going to be a couple. He actually said he thought that it would be romantic if we got married in Hawaii!”
I squeeze his thigh to show my support, and again to help calm him.
“I told him that I loved you. That we were married. That I would always love you. I tried to make him see that what he was pining for, would never happen.”
Brian shakes his head in frustration and then continues.
“It was like he just ignored anything that didn’t fit into his little fairy tale. He acted like I never even said it. Then he just kept looking at me with his puppy dog eyes. It really gave me the creeps. It was like he was totally detached from reality. Nothing I said could break through his daydream of our future together. I told him he needed help. That I hoped that his doctors could help him see reality.”
“I can only imagine how hard it must have been for you to see him like that.”
“Finally I just had to get up and leave. The worst part was that he was still talking, actually yelling at me. Asking me if I’d come back tomorrow. He was so much worse off than I ever imagined. I went there seeking answers, hoping that I’d be able to forgive him. And I left so disillusioned. It was like he was a completely different person. The only thing I could think of was trying to protect you. He truly frightened me, even though I know he can’t hurt you from jail.”
“I’m so, so sorry, Brian. I know how close you two were. It must be horrible to see someone you thought you knew, acting so irrationally.”
“It was… I never want to see him again. I feel so responsible somehow. Did I do this to him?”
“No. No, Brian. You’re not responsible for his mental illness. You have to believe me. Michael would be suffering from these delusions, even if you never met him. Schizophrenia is an illness that is inherited. It’s passed down through your genes. You can no more cause Michael’s schizophrenia than you could cause him to be gay. It’s hard-wired into his DNA. So please don’t blame yourself. There’s nothing you could have done to prevent this.”
That seems to make Brian feel a little better, as he jokes. “Just another one of your public service announcements.”
“Yeah. But you love them. You don’t fool me.”
“I do feel bad. I feel like I lost two of my best friends on the same day. It’s like both of them have morphed into someone I don’t even recognize. I miss my old friends, but I hate who they’ve become.”
“I know it must be hard coming to grips with what’s happened. But like I said, please don’t beat yourself up over this. There’s nothing you could have done. It’s not your fault.”
Brian reaches over and takes Justin’s hand, squeezing it, needing the contact and reassurance. Needing to know that he’s there for him. He feels so much better having vented his frustration and anger that’s built up throughout the day.
Justin’s POV
When we get home Brian carries Gus up to his room, and puts him to bed. We’re both thankful that he has extra clothes at Deb’s. This way we don’t have to wake him up to change him into his pajamas. Once he’s all settled Brian comes in and sits on the bed. I run my hands across his shoulders, feeling how much tension he’s carrying.
“Why don’t you slip out of your clothes and lie down? I’ll massage your back, help relieve some of this stress you’re carrying around.”
He just sighs. So I start unbuttoning his shirt, slipping it off his shoulders. He leans back, looking up at me and our lips meet. The kiss is slow but heartfelt. Then I motion for him to take off his pants. Soon he’s lying on the bed as I sit on his butt and start working his shoulder blades.
“That feels great. You always know just what I need.”
I continue working his shoulders, pushing my thumbs in deeply to ply his tissues. I try to get his muscles to ease up; he carries so much stress in his shoulders. Slowly but surely he starts to relax, letting out a sigh as I make my way down his back. I work all his tired aching muscles, until he finally relaxes to my touch.
When I’m done he rolls over, letting me know there’s another muscle that could use my expertise. I take him into my mouth, my lips gliding up and down his cock as I suck him. Moans escape as I lick around his crown, and then encircle his shaft with my hand. I pump my lips and fist in sync as my tongue flicks across his slit on the upward thrusts, licking up his juices.
His breathing increases as he arches his back, moaning loudly now. I slip my other hand down and cup his sac, fondling his balls while one finger gently caresses his perineum. It’s just a matter of moments before he falls over the edge, fisting my hair as he shoots down my throat. He’s unconsciously chanting my name over and over.
“Justin, Justin, Justin.”
I continue lapping up his juices, licking off the remains while inspecting him for any abnormalities. He doesn’t have to know what I’m doing. I’ve made it a habit to check him out every time I blow him. I don’t want any surprises, and I want to catch anything before it has a chance to develop. I know he enjoys how attentive I am, and he loves the feel of my warm tongue running across his sensitive cock.
As I lift my head he releases the hold he has on my hair. I crawl up his torso until I’m lying on top of him. Once our lips touch we kiss each other. Soon the passion between us builds and the kisses become deeper as we express our love. I feel his arms encompass me as I relax, resting my head on his shoulder. Soon sleep takes us and we remain like this until morning.
The alarm goes off way too early, and all I want to do is crawl deeper under the covers. But he gently slaps my ass telling me to get moving. He jumps up and gets into the shower while I get Gus up and ready for school. The coffee’s brewing as I make scrambled eggs and toast for breakfast. Gus is just pushing the eggs around on his plate, and I wonder if something’s wrong.
“Hey. What’s up, Buddy?”
“I don’t want to go to school today.”
“Why? Is something wrong?”
“I just don’t.”
“Did something happen?”
I’ll just freak if he knows about Lindsay being at the school yesterday. We tried so hard not to let him know about her fiasco, and the injured children.
“Gus. Talk to me. What’s wrong?”
He bites his lip, looking at the floor.
“I don’t want you to think I’m a baby. But I’m scared of going to the dentist.”
I had completely forgotten about today being Gus’s first dental appointment. We put it on the calendar in his room. I drew a picture of a toothbrush to get him used to the idea of going to get his teeth cleaned. I can understand his fear. I always hated the dentist when I was young.
“It will be okay. I’ll be there with you. So there’s no reason to be afraid. Besides, you do such a great job brushing your teeth. And I bet if you’re a really good boy you might even get a toy. His eyes light up at the prospect of a new toy.
“Can I get a new GI Joe?”
I had meant one of the toys that the dentist gives away. But I can rarely say no to him, especially when he is such a good boy.
“I’ll tell you what, if you’re a very, very good boy, and don’t cry, we’ll go to the toy store and you can pick out a new toy.”
Now he’s all happy, but his eggs are cold. So I nuke them in the microwave and put strawberry jam on his toast, it’s his favorite. Brian comes down and grabs his coffee and toast.
Gus is excited. “Hurry up, daddy, were going to be late for school.”
Brian looks at me questioningly. Sure Gus likes school, but he’s not usually excited about it. Just then Brian’s cell phone rings, and I can tell it’s Carl calling to give Brian an update on Lindsay.
He calls me after dropping Gus off at school and lets me know what’s happening. It seems that they’ve traced her movements to New York. Having checked with the airlines, they found out she took a flight out early yesterday afternoon. Even though they don’t know where she is in New York right now, they’ve caught a break. She’s registered to leave on a flight to Monte Carlo later today. The New York City police will be arresting her at the airport as she tries to escape out of the country.
I’m relieved and worried all at the same time. I’m glad they found her, but I’m also worried about just how much trouble she’s in. Brian called again after lunch and it seems that the children she hit yesterday, a brother and a sister didn’t make it through the night. So she’s now looking at a manslaughter charge, and leaving the scene of an accident, as well as a DUI. Things don’t look good for her, and it somehow seems ironic that both she and Michael will be serving time in jail.
TBC…
