CHAPTER 9 – THUNK…THUNK…THUNK…AND THAT’S NOT JUST THEIR HEADS

BOXING DAY MORNING

ZEE & FAAL’S BEDROOM

ZEE

                “I have a hippo and possibly a giraffe.  What do you have?”  I croak at him.

                “Vultures, rhino, hyena, jackals and wildebeest.”  He croaks back.

I sit upright and wait for the head spin.  Nothing.  A good start.  I stumble the bathroom and brush my teeth and then being brave clean my tongue, not pleasant but definitely not good.  Thank God I took Advil before I crashed out, someone didn’t have the common sense to do that.

                “And a howler monkey.”  He mumbles and starts to clean his teeth slowly with his eyes closed.

I know my man when he’s hungover, he’s like a kitten until he’s had drops in his eyes, Advil, some proper coffee, a swim and then breakfast. 

                “Open your eyes let me take care of them and you go back to bed.  Open mouth swallow Advil.  Will bring coffee in an hour, I mean it, you try and swim now you’ll most likely drown.”

                “How are you not feeling as crap as me?”  He gripes letting me lead him back to bed.

                “I am but took Advil before sleeping and we have guests.  Get in.”

I put my sweats on and lower the blinds and pad downstairs.  My head is still throbbing a bit so only take one more and wait for that to kick in, lowering my head on the cool counter helps.

                “Morning.  What on earth are you doing?”  Steve’s voice jars against my nerves.

                “Breakfast.  In a minute.”  I mumble.  “What time did we go to bed?”

                “About two.”

                “Not bad.  How many times did we sing it?”

                “About 3.”

                “Why are you up?”  I start to put the coffee on.

                “Taylor wanted to build a snowman, so I got up and got dressed and of course she’s gone back to sleep.”

I nod and check outside.  Looks like it snowed again.  I can hear movement and Ben, Carl, Justin and the kids come in.  The kids are already in their sweats in readiness for another day of icescapes.

                “Happy Boxing Day everyone!”  Jenny chirrups and seems happy with the mumbled responses.

                “Aunt Zee what are you doing?”  Gus asks.

                “Trying to figure out what to do for breakfast that won’t…”

                “Nothing.”  Justin interrupts.

                “Huh.”  I blink slowly at him, I am so tired.

                “Like Thanksgiving it’s opposite day so you go back to bed and we’ll sort this out.  Now go.”

I could kiss him if I had the energy and pad upstairs carrying a thermos of coffee and pour a cup for Faal.

                “Hey how you feeling?”  I whisper in his ear

                “Better, do I smell coffee?”

I nod and clamber back into bed and snuggle into his side, he lifts his eyebrows.

                “Opposites day today.  And guess what as the host you get out of helping.”

                “Ah and good.  So who’s in charge?”

                “Sunshine oh and I think that Brian and Drew are itching for a swim, so why don’t you go and blow away the cobwebs.”

He swallows back the rest of his coffee and gives me a kiss and I close my eyes for just one minute…

KITCHEN

JUSTIN

                “Finally I get to cook in this kitchen!” 

I grin at mom who was sipping her coffee shaking her head.

                “It is beautiful isn’t it?  So what do you think the gruesome twosome are up to right now?”

                “Don’t know and don’t care.”  I shrug.

                “I shouldn’t laugh but the image I have of George hauling their asses down the stairs is just too funny!”

                “Oh mom, you should’ve seen it.  He just grabbed them and actually shook Michael to get him open the door and did she tell you about the Captain?”

                “No, the Captain who’s the Captain?”  She looks puzzled.

                “You know his comic book hero Captain Astro?”  Emmy Lou reminds her.

                “No Emmy Lou, let Zee tell that.  I think it’s only fair.”  Faal cuts him off.

Emmy Lou nods and smiles, then looks round for Zee.

                “Opposite day, hosts are exempt, she’s back in bed.  She looks so bone tired.  Emmy can you do me a favour, a pamper time for her.  Nice bath and…”

                “Say no more.  Say no more.”  He bustles back upstairs yelling for Daphne.

                “So how many calls has he had from him?”  Faal asks with his eyes dancing.

                “None.  Actually not one.”  I reply suddenly thinking about it.

                “None?  How so?”  Mom asks

                “Well in his enthusiasm to get them gone right the fuck now, George didn’t let them pick up anything personal, he just shoved them out as was!  When I realised what he had done I had the car come back and George gave them their stuff…must have forgotten to give them their phones…”

                “Faal you didn’t!”  Mom gasps.

                “I’ve sent the car with them now, since I’ve just remembered, it will take a while because of the roads, so that buys a morning of peace.  Now I’m going swimming…call me when breakfast is ready.”

                “Right Chef what are we doing for breakfast?”  Mom demands.

SHADYSIDE RESIDENCE

LINDZ

I am absolutely furious!  How dare that cantankerous old buzzard speak to me like that in front of everyone and then to throw me out of the house like I was garbage!  And for them to all stand there like statues and allowing him to do that.  Well Mel is definitely getting a piece of my mind when I get back there!  I can’t wait to get back there and have some decent food and a nice shower, I love Michael dearly, but he doesn’t have the same standards as me.  Let alone decent coffee or crockery to pour it into.

MICHAEL

What the fuck?  Seriously just what the fuck?  How could Brian allow that man to treat me, us, his dearest friends like that!  And as for Zee, well she’s not getting away with that no way!  But first I need coffee, when they send the service once they come to their senses repercussions will be meted out, I might even move into what should by right be Alice and George’s former home.

                “Michael are you up?”

                “Yeah, how you feeling?”  I wave the mug at her and she nods.

                “Hurt and humiliated, for Brian to just stand and…”

                “Actually, we can’t blame Brian it was Zee’s house she should’ve stopped it and she didn’t!”  I grouse.

                “You’re right.  But I have to be careful where that thing is concerned, we are staying in Faal’s Brownstone and no doubt if she blows him right she can get us kicked out.”

                “True, I wouldn’t put it past her to do that too.  What does he see in her anyway?  Yeah she’s attractive I guess but as for the rest, for example she doesn’t have your class, I can see him more with someone like you than her.”

She nods and smiles, seemingly drifting off somewhere.

                “Um, Lindz I’ve been meaning to ask you this, why is your hair kinda green?”

                “Oh it reacted badly to some shampoo that Daphne leant me.”

                “Ah she’s another one on my shit list!”  I snap. “The way she thinks she can order me about and that ‘breathing’ shit thing at dinner, she even got that Vince guy to do it.”

                “You do know they’re fucking?”

I shudder at that thought.

                “So now what?”  I repeat.

                “Oh sorry.  Now we wait for them to call and apologise for the way they allowed us to be treated and beg for our forgiveness, which we will give eventually.”  She smiles.

TREEHOUSE

JUSTIN

I am in heaven!  The Korin knives are just the perfect weight, we are getting a set for home and that wine fridge.  I can’t believe I have kitchen envy.  I’m trying to figure out what I have to do to persuade Brian that we have to remodel the kitchen.

                “We are not remodelling the kitchen twat!”  Brian whispers my ear.

I give a small squeal and snuggle into his robe covered chest.

                “Can we at least get the knives and the wine fridge?  Please?” 

I turn round in his embrace and nibble his chin and give his nipples a quick pinch, he pauses for a moment before swooping me into a deep kiss, whilst kneading my ass.  My legs start to creep up to his waist.

                “I don’t get to fuck in there so you don’t either.”  Faal calls out as he heads upstairs.

                “Spoilsport!”  Brian calls back.

                “Brian please?”

I wiggle into his hips and he catches he breath, biting his lip he grins and nods and after checking the hallway pins me to the fridge in a soul shredding kiss.  He lifts his mouth off mine and kisses a trail to my ear, nibbling on my lobe. 

                “Brian no we can’t…mmm”

                “Hush.” 

He whispers into my ear and kisses and licks my pulse point.

                “Brian, please stop, can we at least…”

The rest of my sentence trails off as his hands slip into my sweatpants and palm my ass.  Soon I am rutting against him with a mouthful of robe and whimpering as his fingers brush against my balls and stroke my inner thighs.

And then he stops, kisses my nose and leaves.  Bastard!

FAAL

I feel much better after my swim and I hope Zee managed to get some more sleep, she’s has worked so hard these last few days.  I hope Emmy Lou knows what he’s getting into she’s takes perfection to a new level. 

I snort softly and shake my head.  Whilst is Zee still in bed, she’s awake and reading her iPad.  However, she’s been joined by Emmy Lou, Daphne and Mel, who are asleep. 

                “Emmy Lou.”  I whisper shaking him gently.

                “What Drewsie, not now I’m tired…”  He mumbles.

                “Not Drewsie.  Wake up.  Come on.”  I shake him a bit harder.

                “How do you get out of this bed in the mornings?”  He mumbles

                “How is this pampering her hmm?” 

                “We’re anchors keeping her from getting up and helping.  Also using our body heat to soothe her to sleep.”  Daphne mumbles snuggling deeper into the pillows.

                “Not asleep.” 

Zee’s voice jerks them both awake and Daphne shoves Mel.  I have to laugh at their guilty sleepy expressions.

                “I’m hopping in the shower and then the pampering begins yes?” 

                “Yes!”  They chorus back.

HUNTER

                “You okay J?  For you you’ve been really quiet.” 

She shrugs and continues to pack the snow for her fort.  I nudge her shoulder and wait for her to look at me.

                “Do you think, do you think he’s really bought us presents?”

                “I don’t know but don’t build your hopes up too much okay?  That way when they are dashed…”

                “You won’t be disappointed I know.”  She sighs.

                “You gonna be okay?” 

She nods and carries on building her fort, with one last look I head back to the pool for more skating.

DREW

I can see from Jenny shoulders that she’s crying and dash outside.

                “Jenny come here, come on come here.” 

It takes her a few seconds to move.  For all her toughness she’s just a little girl who wants to know that her dad loves her above all else.  I scoop her up, carry her inside and head to the kitchen.

                “Um Ben…”  Justin speaks quietly.

Ben looks at him and then turns round, he closes his eyes and sighs.

                “Damn you Michael.”  He mutters before taking Jenny in his arms and heading upstairs.

SHADYSIDE RESIDENCE

MICHAEL

Lindz and I have been waiting for them to call but so far nothing.  It’s not that late though and they most probably had a boozy night.

There’s a knock at the door, Lindz looks out the window and smiles.

                “There’s a car outside.  What did I tell you?” 

I grin back and she nods for me to open the door.

                “Yes can I help you?”  I ask smugly recognising the driver from last night.

                “Yes, it would appear…”

                “We’ll just get our coats, we won’t be long…”  Lindz calls out.

                “No you misunderstand, it appears you left your phones at the Ugerstacht Res…I mean the Treehouse and I was asked to return them, so here you are.  Good day to you both and happy holidays.”

As we watch him drive away, we just look at each other in bewilderment. 

BEN

I need to find Mel.

                “Shm prrlys in Aunt Zee fmm wt Aunt Daph.”  She mumbles having quieted a bit

                “Okay, going to go with in Zee’s room with Aunt Daph?”  I ask and she nods.

When I get to the door I call out, Daph swings it open giggling, which dies immediately.

                “Oh Jenny!”  She cries out, which sets Jenny off again.

                “What’s hap…oh baby, my sweet baby.  Come on come in here.” 

Mel takes her from my arms and I give them a small smile and head out.

                “Hey papa where you going?  Get in here too.”  Mel calls out.

I slide in next to my daughter and we try to make it okay.

FAAL

                “Anyone know where Zee’s going?”  I ask as she follows the driver to the garage.

Justin and Brian shrug.

                “Hope Jenny’s okay.”  Justin sighs.

                “What’s wrong with my granddaughter?”  Debs demands coming in carrying Taylor.

                “What or who do you think?”  Ben answers.  “She’s with her mom and Aunt Daph.  I think Emmy Lou is going to be pampering her too.”

Debs sighs and heads upstairs shaking her head.

                “Is Jenny okay?”  Hunter asks

By now almost everyone is in the kitchen willing Michael to ring or even Lindz, but nothing.

                “Right so who’s for breakfast, we might as well eat it whilst it’s…”  Justin begins.

Just then a furious looking Zee comes back in with two axes and looks at Ben and Hunter.

                “You two with me.” 

We all follow her outside and there is the Captain Astro statue she got from Brian, when she told me what she was going to do with it, I thought it was a typically sweet gesture.  But of course she wasn’t going to tell them about it just sell it and put the money into their funds.

                “Fuck I hate that thing!”  Hunter snarls.

                “I thought you said you burnt it?”  Ben looks puzzled.

                “He lied to me so I lied to him.”  She shrugs.  “I had a buyer all lined up and ready to go and then I thought of Lizzie Borden…”

                “Lizzie Borden?”  Steve looks confused.

                “An infamously acquitted murderess who took an axe to her father and step…”  Ben begins to grin.

                “I really do need firewood for the furnace.” 

She turns to Ben and Hunter and hands them the axes. 

“Have at it.”

 Ben and Hunter look at each other and start to roll up their sleeves.

                “Justin you might to start breakfast again.  Chopping wood works up an appetite!”  George chuckles.

Justin didn’t reply as he was too busy filming it on his phone and giggling.

ZEE & FAAL’S BEDROOM

DAPH

                “How’s my girls?”  I ask Mel.

She puts her fingers to her lips and we move outside into the hallway

                “With Emmy Lou discussing paint colours for her fingers and helping Taylor with her bath, so much better.  I think she’s just gearing herself up for disappointment and getting it out the way now, what’s that noise?”  She asks.

I grin at her and tug her downstairs.  Once I heard the “have at it” and knew I had to get Mel. 

What greets us is astonishing.  Ben and Hunter are swinging the axes with rabid, yes that’s the word, rabid enthusiasm!  I know that this is not a metaphor or whatever the fuck they want to call it about violence and Michael but that man is like a burr you can’t see and if you could you can’t quite reach...it’s about venting their frustration and disappointment though I think Hunter is starting to tire.

                “Anyone else want a go?”  He gasps

                “Me, I want a go.”  Mel says.

We all look at her and Hunter hands her the axe.

                “Oof this fucking thing is heavy!  Is there a proper way to swing?”  She asks.

                “Would widen your grip or you risk it flying backwards, it being embedded into the wood and it’s a fuck to get out when that happens or even worse it swings into you.   Here let me show you.” 

George stands behind her and adjusts her hands.

                “Go to it.”

After about an hour, Captain Astro is well and truly in the furnace.

ZEE

                “Come here you.”  I call to Faal.

                “The phones?”  He’s ready for battle.

                “Yeah the phones.  But, slow your roll, there are cabs, he has a car and google maps is your friend, there were ways and means of them getting in touch with Mel, Jenny and Hunter.  They could even have threatened to hijack the service and demand they were driven here, but they didn’t so no matter what you did with the phones they made a conscious decision to be selfish.”

He buries his face in my hair and sighs. 

                “You’re amazing you know that?”  He murmurs.

                “Mmm.  So I’ve been told by a particularly gorgeous South African guy I know.”

                “Who is this I will smite the man that touches my fair maiden.”  He growls.

I snort and give him a quick kiss.

                “Think Justin’s forgotten he’s on food?”  I ask tiredly the adrenalin high from earlier gone.

                “Yeah.  He had two goes.  Oh my lig you look exhausted let me call him in.”

                “No it’s okay.  So we’re at brunch now?  Um, there is a…”

                “Sorry!  Shit I’m so very sorry!”  Justin comes rushing in looking contrite.

                “Call your commis, this lady is going to lie down.”  I sigh in relief.

SHADYSIDE RESIDENCE

LINDZ

                “Michael, please stop!” 

He has done nothing but whine for the last hour, I was a surprised as he was when they just returned our phones, which again is Zee’s doing.

                “We need to call them.”

                “What the fuck for we didn’t do anything wrong they should call us it was us that was humiliated and thrown out by the staff no less!”  He is incredulous.

                “I know that, you know that but we have to be the bigger people here and disregard the behaviours and pretend nothing has happened.  You want to get back in Brian’s good books and with Jenny so let’s work towards that starting with a call.  Michael, please answer me honestly on this question, do you still love Ben?”

                “I-I…”

                “Is that why you have been delaying the signing of the papers?”  I ask gently.

He nods and smiles sadly.

                “Okay so let’s make the call and that way we can both get what we want.”

TREEHOUSE

MEL

                “I am so pleased I don’t start until the New Year give me time to work off this excellent food so I can fit into my new suits.  Oh Daph I still owe you big for that!”

She giggles and then blows on Vince’s fingers to get the nail dust off them.  Turns out he’s a slut for a mani-pedi and hand and foot massages – so she’s doing his nails for him.

                “Hey squared off, how is that squared off?”  He gripes digging her in the hip.

                “It’s a squoval…okay squaring I’m squaring!  There that better?”

                “Yeah you’re not bad at this.”  He admires her work.

                “Okay now rinse.” 

She places his hand in the bowl of warm water and then dries them before rubbing in various oils and lotions.  Judging by the expressions flicking across his face this is a good thing.

I’m startled out of my watching by my phone ringing.  When I saw who it is I signalled Daph who quickly comes over as does Vince

                “Melanie Marcus speaking.”

                “Mel its Lindz, look I’m sorry if anything I did or said caused that unpleasant situation yesterday.   I can understand that they was taken aback by George’s behaviour that she didn’t have time to react to anything.  If it is okay with you we’d like to come back for dinner, we would hate for Christmas to be tainted by a minor skirmish.  Would it be possible for you to ask on our behalf?”

                “I will do that and call you back okay?  Give me about 20 minutes, Zee and Faal are out in the workshop there’s a problem with the furnace.”

                “Of course not a problem.  And Mel, I love you.”

She hung up before I could say anything back to her.

                “Oh you think you can play fool to catch wise do you girlie.”  Daph growls

                “Doing what to do what?”  I ask

                “It’s a Jamaican proverb, it means to play stupid to get what you want.”  She explains.

                “I love that.”  Vince chuckles.

KITCHEN

JUSTIN

                “Less eating and more cooking Sunshine.”  Carl teases me.

                “Seriously, take it out of reach, I think I just need to instruct from a safe distance, like maybe upstairs.”  I groan licking the shreds of goose off my fingers.

I had to smile when I went to start brunch, in the back kitchen was a tray that said cook me.  She had made double the amount of pies but not cooked them all, no wonder she was so tired. 

Mom was on salad duties and Tucker was on mulled wine and hot apple cider for the kids.  Emmy Lou…despite our protests, Blake and Ted were setting the table and Drew was sorting out the fires. 

Last time we checked Faal was working in his office and Zee was asleep. 

Ben, Steve and Brian said they would be supervising the kids…if they think they are using that excuse for dinner they can think again. 

Jenny is watching cartoons with Taylor and Debs and Alice were doing each other’s nails and keeping an eye on them.

                “Think we should call everyone in now?”  I ask testing the pies

                “Yep, it’s all set and I’m starving.  What are you going to do for dinner?”    

                “No idea but maybe a hash with either the beef or the goose…between Lilah, Brian and Drew they decimated the salmon.” 

                “So much for his no carbs after seven rule.”  She laughs softly.

We call everyone in.  Faal insists we let Zee sleep some more, we are almost done when she comes down and sits in his lap.

                “Why didn’t you wake me?”  She mumbles and starts picking at his pie.

                “Because you needed to sleep.”  Carl tells her kindly.

                “I have something to say.”  Mel announces.  “Lindz called and they have apologised for having to leave at such short notice and causing upset to the kids.  As they said it could not be helped and want to chalk it up to experience and get the boiler checked ahead of time.  So they would like to rejoin us for dinner.  If that’s okay with you the kids.” 

They exchange glances.

                “It’s up to you J, you’re the one that matters here.” Hunter asks

                “Okay.”  She says quietly.  “But I’m still pissed they didn’t say goodbye!” 

                “And she’s back!”  Gus exclaims.

                “In that case it’s fine with us.”  Zee replies

After brunch the kids go back to what they were doing and Mel goes to make the call.

MEL

                “Lindsay.  Dinner will be at seven.  The service will pick you up at four.  We’re going to share the one coming home just in case that Michael forgets that he has a daughter and doesn’t talk to her whilst Brian is in his sight.  See you then.”

SHADYSIDE RESIDENCE

LINDZ

        “The car is picking us up at four.  Don’t forget the presents this time.”

                “Okay, that gives me time, I’m not so sure about the present for Hunter, so I think I will take a quick trip into town just to see if there is something else.” 

I shrug and settle on his couch. 

The first thing I’m going to do when we get back is have a hot shower, she has been treated to some fabulous bath products by that husband of hers.

CITY CENTRE

MICHAEL

At least we are going back there for dinner.  Even though I hate to admit it, she is a great cook, even better than ma, Faal is a lucky man. 

So what to get Hunter?  Something to do with motorbikes I guess. 

TREEHOUSE

VINCE

It is taking everything in my power not to whimper.  The things Daphne is doing to my feet, that girl has good hands, no wonder she’s studying to be a doctor.  She’s got a good heart and the way…oh shit that feel so good. 

JENNY

I know that it was a “lie” to momma to say that Vince and Daph were making out but the way he’s just gone boss-eyed and her schmoopy grin has given me the most incredible idea!  I need to find Uncle Brian and Auntie Ems.

BRIAN

                “You want me to agree to what?”

                “Please for Jenny think of it as a benevolent charitable gift!”  Emmy Lou begs.

                “The things I do for you!”  I gripe.  “Justin!”  I bellow.

CAR SERVICE

LINDZ

                “You need to fix the room that is currently your office to be a room for Jenny to stay in when she visits.”

                “Of course, I can’t wait for her to visit.”

                “Michael, there is one more thing I need to ask you, please don’t think I’m being impertinent.  But what about the loan repayments they mentioned.  What are you going to do?”

                “Lindz don’t worry about it.  Like you said we will both get what we want, now let’s just enjoy the rest of the night okay.”

TREEHOUSE

BLAKE

I hear the doorbell and sigh.

                “Lindsay, Michael come in, come in.  Everyone is in the lounge.”

                “Blake why are you walking like that?  Ted get a little enthusiastic?”  Michael snickers.

                “Teddy?  I really didn’t think he had it in him.”  Lindz giggles

                “He didn’t he had it in Blake apparently.”  Michael scoffs.

I say nothing and totter back to the lounge with a smile on my face.

LINDZ

I can’t wait to get to the salon, but I fluff up my hair as best I can under the circumstances and follow them inside and like Michael come to a halt in shock.

Of all the things I expected to be faced with this is not one of them. 

                “Isn’t it great momma, dad, we’re pedicuring!” 

Jenny is beaming.  Mel is filming it with Gus. 

“Come and sit down.  You can do dad and he can do yours.”  She instructs.

                “Wait don’t you want your presents first?”  Michael tries.

                “Oh no that can wait until later.  Come on sit take off your shoes and socks.”

We sit down and reluctantly do as we’re bid.  She hands over the remover and pad to her father and instructs him as he takes off my carefully applied polish.  Knowing that I will have to be that close to his feet later I try not to shudder.

An hour and two glasses of wine later we are all finished.  I look in dismay at my toes and sigh knowing I will be doing them again.

                “Okay I am the judge and I declare the winners to be…Aunt Daph and Uncle Vince.  They have applied their polishes perfectly with no smudges.”  Jenny decrees.

                “What’s the prize honey?”  Mel asks.

                “Oh um, I hadn’t thought of that.  Let me think about I’m sure I’ll come up with something!” 

I head towards Mel and give her a kiss on the cheek.

                “Um where’s F…I mean Zee and Faal, I wanted to make sure that…”

                “Workshop, furnace is still acting up.”  She replies coolly.

                “Ah okay, look I’m going to go up and shower, once I’ve said hello to them.”

She nods and I slip on my shoes and head to the workshop.  The lights are on and I can hear voices, low but sharp.  Seems to be trouble in paradise. 

I try not to smile too hard as I fluff up my hair and look through the crack in the door to try and time my entrance just right.  But instead of the heated exchange I am expecting to witness they’re kissing, he has her pinned to the wall with one hand and is pulling at her sweat pants with the other. 

                “Haas my liefling haas!”  She’s gasping

“Why are we here instead of our lovely comfortable bed?”  He’s demands between kisses

“Because like Justin you make too much damn noise and they can’t hear us here.  Now haas!”

I stumble backwards with my heart racing and rush back to the house.

        “Lindz you okay?”  Ted asks me.

        “Um, yes I just need…wanted to say…I’m heading for a shower.”  I mumble.

He frowns at me but I just rush upstairs and try to wash away that image from my mind.  When I feel a bit more settled I head back downstairs.  Still rattled but more settled.

        “Lindz would you like a drink?”  Carl asks.

        “Yes a brandy please.” 

I take a deep sip and let out a breath.  Zee and Faal come in smiling and joking.  Everyone, even Taylor, is admiring each other’s toes.  I have to keep my socks on because Michael made such a crappy job I had to take it off, of course his look great and he’s wiggling them for all to see!

                “Furnace fixed?”  Brian asks handing them a drink each.

                “Yep.”  Faal snickers.

                “Seems to break down a lot.”  Brian is smiling that smile of his

                “Want us to take the sound machine back?”  Zee tilts her head at him

                “Touché.”  Brian raises his glass.

All three of them burst out laughing and I just want to scream.

                “Mom you okay?”  Gus is by my side.

                “Yes lambskin.  Oh nice toenails, who did those for you?” 

                “Matt and Hunter.  Despite what Jenny says I think dad’s ones are the best.  Papa did this scale design on them, go have a look.”

I head towards them with my best smile.

                “Brian according to our son, you should’ve won best toenails today, may I?” 

I start to hunker down when Jennifer’s cool voice stops me.

                “Lindsay as much as I would like to see you prostrate yourself, we have pictures.”

My face flames and I look round for them.

                “Here momma, I’m going to do a scrapbook for this Christmas it’s been one of the best ones of my life.  Well some of it.”

Jenny hands me her phone and I have to admit that the design Justin did is incredible.

                “Can you send this to me sweetheart, just the one that Uncle Justin did?”

                “No sorry momma, I promised I wouldn’t share it with anyone else and I never break my promises.”

Justin comes in and clears his throat.

                “Dinner is served.”

We all troop inside and Zee suddenly throws an ice cube at Justin.

                “How the hell did you find them?!”

He’s giggling and everyone is looking at them and then Emmett looks at the table and starts laughing too.

                “I wondered what you were doing in the back freezer!”

                “Care to explain what’s so amusing to the rest of the group?”  Carl chimes in.

                “The prawns.  She thought she hid them well.”  Emmett explains taking his seat.

                “So what’s for dinner Sunshine?”  Brian asks

                “Apart from the ghost pepper prawns we have goose risotto and beef spring rolls.  Emmy Lou!”

                “Sorry!” 

Dinner was lovely but I avoided the prawns after the wings debacle.  Once we settled in the lounge, I finally started to feel my equilibrium returning. 

                “Do you want your presents now?”  Michael asks Jenny and Hunter.

The room goes quiet as they open them.  Jenny has a Wonder Woman action figure and Hunter has a motorbike tee.  They both mumble their thanks and head upstairs with Gus and Matt.  All I think to myself is next time I will go shopping with him and hope that nobody says anything.

                “Why in the hell did you get them that?”  Debs demands.

                “What’s wrong with their gifts ma, it’s the thought that counts!”  Michael snaps

                “Yeah well if you thought a bit more, you’d realise that Jenny needs stuff for roller derby and it’s motocross that Hunter does not motorbikes!  Jesus Michael.”

                “I tried!”  He folds his arms over his chest and pouts for the rest of the evening.

                “So what are we…sorry you all doing for New Year’s Eve?”  Daphne asks.

                “Not really thought about it to be honest.”  Mel answers.  “What with us just moving in and all…”

                “That’s perfect!”  I cry.

Everyone turns to me in surprise.

                “What is?”  Mel asks me somewhat warily and I try not to bridle.

                “We can have a housewarming/New Year’s Eve party at the Brownstone!” 

                “No.”  Zee’s blunt response silences the room.

                “Are you saying that I can’t have a cocktail party…”  My tone is chilly but I can’t help it.

                “No, it’s just…”

                “Just what?” I snap.

                “Lindz, if you would…”  Mel tries to placate me.

                “Are you doubting my abilities as a hostess Zee?”

                “No, I am saying that my Brownstone is a family home not designed for cocktail parties or any other kind of shindig of more than 6 people, which is why I built this place!”

                “I have an idea!  Why not hold it at our place but with Mel and Lindz hosting?”  Emmett suggests.

                “Seriously Emmett, you’d do that?  Oh thank you so much.”  I gush.

He grins back at me. 

                “Oh there is so much to do.  Zee, Faal could you call the car service to take us home, I have so many ideas that I need to write them down!”

I dash upstairs and call the kids and within half an hour we are all on our way home.

DAPH

                “So Emmy Lou I did good?”

                “You did good?”

Everyone turns to look at us.

                “Again sharing rest of group?”  Carl asks.  “And Justin those prawns weren’t too bad, the wings were spicier.”

                “Miss Thing’s ego is such that she will try and beat Zee at this game, but lose, and Justin told her they were ghost pepper prawns just so she wouldn’t have any.  A toast…om die lig aan die einde van die tonnel! En die handskoene om af!

                “What the fuck does that mean?”  Debs chuckles.

                “To the light at the end of the tunnel.  And the gloves being off.”  Faal translates.

                “You two are up to something aren’t you?”  Zee smiles at us.

                “I don’t know what you mean.”  I reply and sip my drink.