Justin and Brian wandered down to the stream. Brian had apologized to Claire for running out on her. He found all this drama very hard to stomach. When Justin had suggested they go home, he had been ready to do that, more than ready. But then something had stopped him. He had come all this way to find out about his family and some part of him wanted to know it all. He had already learned some amazing things.

Jack had another son. He had a half-brother. He had always known Jack liked the ladies. How many times had he heard his parents fighting about where Jack had been, who he had been with? Joan didn't want the old bastard but she didn't want anyone else to have him either. Had to keep up appearances, you know.

And then there was Claire, a kind and gracious lady, the kind of woman that Brian would have longed for in a mother. Jack had done her wrong, like he had so many others, Brian included. But she didn't seem bitter, just disappointed. She would have been happy for Jack to have come back even after all these years. Brian wondered if she would have even recognized her Jack in the man that his father had become.

Brian sat on the big rock watching the sun as it started its descent towards the horizon. Justin sat between his legs and periodically Brian rested his chin on the top of the blond head. Justin was the only constant in this shifting drama. Brian held on tight.

Claire had said they would eat late because it took John a long time to drive home from the city. He often worked on Saturdays and would be there some time before eight o'clock. Apparently he was quite a successful architect, but he had never married and continued to live with his mother on the farm. He loved the property and had poured a lot of money back into it over the years. Brian found it hard to envision living with your mother as you approached forty, even if your mother was Claire.

"Let's go climb your tree," Justin suggested suddenly.

"Are you fucking nuts?"

"Come on. It'll be fun," Justin said standing up and tugging on Brian's hand. He hoped that might pull Brian out of the melancholy that seemed to have enveloped him.

"Justin…"

"Come on. I want to see where you would have built your treehouse."

Brian was about to tell Justin to fuck off when he thought better of it. Justin's strength and support would be needed when John arrived, and he and Brian met for the first time. Brian knew he could never face it on his own. He allowed Justin to pull him up and they made their way to the tree beside the house. They could see Claire in the kitchen putting the finishing touches on her pot roast.

"Give me a boost," Justin said looking up at the branch.

Brian made a cup of his hands and boosted Justin onto the branch. Justin's lovely ass was right in his face as he did so, and he felt his dick grow hard as he held Justin's backside making sure he had purchase on the branch. Then he reluctantly let go.

"Come on up," Justin said with a smile as he situated himself on the branch, his feet dangling down. "The weather's great up here," Justin giggled.

Brian found a spot he could wedge his foot into and with a mighty grunt he propelled himself up beside Justin. He wiggled around until he was sitting beside his lover. Justin's hand went around Brian's waist and he leaned in for a kiss.

"Happy now?" Brian asked.

"Very," Justin grinned.

"It's not nearly as far from the ground as I remembered," Brian observed looking around.

"You were five," Justin reminded him. "Gus would love it up here."

"Yeah," Brian sighed. He was worried about meeting John. He couldn't decide if he wanted the guy to be nice and then he could have the brother he had often wished for. Or, John could be an asshole like him, and he could go home never wanting to see these people again.

A big black Lincoln Navigator slowed at the entrance to the driveway and then turned in. This had to be John. Brian drew in a breath and watched from his vantage point in the tree. The Navigator pulled up beside the Jeep and a tall, thin man got out. He looked questioningly at the Jeep and then headed for the house not seeing Brian and Justin in the tree.

"Mother," he called, "whose car is that?" He disappeared into the house.

Brian dropped down from the tree. Their brief escape into Neverneverland was obviously over. Justin slid down and Brian caught him as he landed. That earned Brian a big kiss.

"Excuse me!" said a strange and somewhat annoyed voice from behind them. "My mother said we had company. Dinner's ready."

"Thanks," said Justin taking Brian's hand and leading the man towards the back door of the house.

Brian allowed himself to be led, finding it difficult to drag his eyes away from the other man, his brother. They did have some similarities. They both had Jack's nose and they were tall and Brian wasn't sure but he thought the eyes might be the same too. This man, however, didn't seem the least bit happy to see them. Brian wondered what Claire had told him.

When they all were in the kitchen Claire took a deep breath and said, "John, I want you to meet Jack's son. This is your half-brother, Brian Kinney."

"What?" John asked looking from his mother to Brian and back again. "Brother?"

Brian extended his hand, but John just stared at it.

"Jackie," Claire said using the affectionate nickname she had always called him and putting her hand on his shoulder. He shrugged it off and silently marched out the door. They all stared after him. When there was no further sound from outside Claire seemed to relax. "Thank God he didn't get in the car and drive away. He needs some time to absorb what he was just told."

"He never knew … about Jack?" Brian asked.

"He knew Jack was his father, and I always said Jack would come back for us some day, but he never knew about the other family."

Brian realized he was 'the other family'. "Should I go after him?" he asked tentatively.

"He'll be down by the stream," Claire said. "Go talk to him. Dinner can wait."

Reluctantly Brian went out the door. He fucking hated this kind of emotion. But what could he do? He made his way down to the stream and saw John sitting on the same rock that he had occupied earlier in the day.

"Hey," Brian said lamely as he approached.

"Leave me alone."

Brian debated doing just that. He could get in the Jeep and they could be back at the loft in a few hours. He knew somehow that that wouldn't be a good idea even though that's what he would love to do, leave all this family shit and turmoil right here where it belonged.

"I fell in this creek when I was a little boy," Brian said by way of conversation.

John looked up at him and frowned searching for a memory. "How old were you?"

"About five," Brian said. "It was the last time that Jack ever brought me here."

"Jack! That was fucking Jack? I pulled you from the stream that day and took you back to the house. I ran away and hid behind the barn when you started to cry and called for your father. I watched him whip you but good. He scared the shit out of me."

"That was dear old dad," Brian said sarcastically.

"That was Jack? But … how? How could that asshole who beat up a little kid be the man my mother described as my father?"

"I think he changed … a lot … after he left here."

"Fuck!" John said shaking his head. "I actually saw my father that day … and I didn't have a fucking clue."

"I guess I should thank you for pulling me out of that stream," Brian said extending his hand once again. This time John took it and looked into Brian's eyes, eyes that matched his own.

"Maybe I should have let you drown," John said.

"Maybe you should have," Brian admitted.

John's eyebrows arched up at that statement and his face softened a bit. "Mother will be having a fit because her dinner will be burnt. We better go back."

"Sure," Brian said as he followed John back to the house.

The reluctant brothers sauntered back to the house. Of course, Brian's saunter was well perfected, whereas big brother John's still needed work. Brian smirked as the two fell into an easy rhythm, swaggering their way to the door.

"What?" John asked, seeing the smirk pasted on Brian's face.

"We kinda walk the same."

"And if we're both left handed then we probably jerk off the same, doesn't mean we're going to be best buds and hang out together."

Brian stopped abruptly, his smirk becoming more evil. Then as if cruising a hot trick, Brian stared at John, looking him over, up and down, stopping at a spot on his shoulder. "Don't need to jerk off." Brian mumbled. Then louder, "And if that chip on your shoulder gets any bigger, you'll become a hunchback. Believe me, I'm an expert on chips."

"Oh yeah? You gonna knock it off me?"

"Nope." Brian was very aware he carried his own set of chips that he was still working on. He had no business working on anyone else's.

John's hardened expression softened again as he began to realize that Brian might not be the threat he initially thought he would be. "Who knocked the big one off your shoulder?"

"That little blond in there with your mother. And if we don't get into the house soon, there won't be any dinner left for us to eat."

The brothers hurried inside.

***************************************

"Well, I see you're both alive and no blood was shed. I suppose I should be grateful. Now, go wash up, the both of you, then sit, before my dinner is ruined."

John and Brian looked convincingly contrite as John showed Brian where he could wash up. Claire winked at Justin as he helped to set the table. Justin gave Claire the thumbs up sign.

Dinner was quiet, the small talk was limited to the artist Kinney and how Justin's interest in art sparked this journey into the Kinney family past. The implication of Kinney's homosexual affair and the obvious out and proud way Brian and Justin conducted themselves fascinated Claire. John was also quite curious but remained stoic.

"Brian, I hope you don't mind me asking, you and Justin are...what is the correct term?"

"We're partners."

"Partners, thank you. You mentioned you have a son? Uh, how can that be?"

"The short version? My best friend, Lindsay, from college wanted to have children. I made a donation."

"And her husband agreed to this?"

"Her husband doesn't have the necessary equipment. Mel, Lindsay's partner, is a woman."

"Oh dear. This is a bit confusing."

"It gets better. Michael, my other best friend, fathered a child for Melanie and he just got married to his partner, Ben."

"You must lead an interesting life."

"You don't know the half of it!" Justin interjected.

"Did Jack know about all of this?"

"He found out I'm gay shortly before he died. We rarely spoke and when we did it was only when he needed money." Brian noticed the wince from Claire then quickly added. "He did get to meet Gus. He seemed genuinely happy to meet his grandson. Joan, on the other hand, is convinced that I'm going straight to hell and bringing Justin along with me. I corrupted the poor lad at the tender age of seventeen."

"Brian, you didn't have to corrupt me, I would have done that on my own. Claire, I was lucky. Brian was my first and even though he doesn't like to hear me say this, he was very kind and gentle with me. I'll never forget that. No matter what happens between us, I can never forget."

Justin's sentiment was not wasted on Brian. Their rocky beginning and past notwithstanding, they had to admit their connection would never fade. Justin reached for Brian's hand and gave it a little squeeze. Claire nodded with understanding, her mind going back to that summer when Jack was kind and gentle with her. She understood the connection.

"Your son lives with his mother?"

"Yes, he does. I..." Brian hesitated, hating all this soul searching sentimentality. Sucking it up, he continued. "I have a picture of Gus, if you'd like to see him."

"Yes, I'd like to, very much."

Brian removed his wallet from his pocket and took out several pictures. The one of him holding Gus the night he was born and another recent photo. The picture of Jack holding Brian as a baby slipped out from between them and fell in front of Claire. Snatching it up before Brian could, Claire stared at the photo.

"You and Jack?" Brian nodded. Forty years of tears began their descent down Claire's face. The emotionally stunted and embarrassed brothers who had no idea what to do. Justin got up and brought a nearby box of tissues to the table then gave Claire a hug, holding her until she was able to compose herself.

"I'm sorry, Claire; I guess this wasn't a good idea." Brian started, not knowing the right words of comfort.

"Brian, sorry is bulldinky! Jack and I both made mistakes. Instead of being honest with each other, we hid the truth. By doing so we made a lot of people suffer. We can't undo the past but we can try to make the future better. I have no intention of inserting my way into your life and I suspect that your intentions are the same. You were curious about your roots and I don't blame you. My concern is with John. I know this has been a shock for you Brian but think of how this is affecting John. John, I will respect your wishes. You are my son and my first priority. If you don't want me to pursue a friendship with Brian, I won't. If you want to get to know him better, I'll support that too."

"You're very lucky to have a mother like Claire, John. Joan, let's just say that if Joan learns any of this, she'd be in the nearest church on her knees saying a novena. I'm not here to mess up your life; I just wanted to know why Jack was so angry all the time."

"How noble of you." John, who had remained silent for most of the 'this is your life, Brian Kinney, show,' finally spoke up. "Aren't you forgetting something?"

"I don't know what you mean."

"This farm."

"What about it?"

"It's yours."

"Mine? What the fuck are you talking about?"

"Brian! Language." Claire and Justin spouted out in unison. Brian dramatically sighed and rolled his eyes. "What do you mean the farm's mine?"

"The deed. And Aidan's will. The farm and the land were passed on to Jack when Aidan died. You are Jack's legitimate heir. Therefore the farm is yours." John got up and walked to the refrigerator. Pulling out a beer for himself, he offered one to Brian, who accepted with a nod. John shut the fridge door and plopped back into his chair. He laughed at the look of indignation on Justin's baby face. "Sorry, I didn't think you were old enough to drink." Brian, who nearly shot his beer out via his nose, coughed down a laugh. Justin remained silent and highly insulted. Brian and John couldn't help themselves and burst out laughing. Justin, pulling 'a Mikey' crossed his arms in front of his chest and huffed.

"Justin, why don't we leave these two cretins to their beer? Besides the cookies, I made an apple pie earlier today. How about the two of us have a piece with some vanilla ice cream? That sound good to you?" Justin, never able to turn down apple pie and ice cream, smugly smiled at the devastated brothers. Claire, turning to the older boys, declared, "If you two clean up the kitchen, then and only then will you get some pie."

John and Brian faced each other for a split second then jumped up to clear the table and wash the dishes.

Claire rewarded the boys as promised with ample slices of pie dripping with ice cream. With coffee on a tray, the newly formed family had dessert in Claire's living room.

"Claire, these paintings, did Kinney paint them? They're beautiful. The landscapes, so full of detail. It's like I was standing in the fields. I wish I could paint like that." Justin stood in front of a painting of a corn field admiring the technique. "His use of color and the upsweep brush stroke, simple yet insightful."

"Justin, your paintings are beautiful too."

"But nothing like this, Brian. Besides, you know I sketch better than I paint. Claire, do you have more of Kinney's work?"

"Yes, in the hall. I've tried to keep the paintings out of direct sunlight so they wouldn't fade. Come and look." Justin and Brian followed Claire into the hall that led to the upper floor. Lining the walls were several paintings. Some landscapes, others portraits. John, who grew up with the paintings remained in the living room.

"Brian, look at this. This is the young man in the painting, the one in the book. I bet he was Kinney's lover." A small plate on the bottom of the frame had the name Patrick engraved on it. "I wonder what happened to him."

"The story goes that after Kinney's wife discovered their affair she demanded that Patrick leave the country immediately. He did. He went to South America. He was shortly followed by Kinney, who first arranged with his lawyer to oversee the farmland until his son was of age. He then packed up whatever he could carry and left the country. Other than an occasional painting finding its way back to America, Kinney and Patrick were never heard from again."

"They gave up everything to be with each other." Brian's cough brought Justin back down to earth. "I could use another cup of your coffee, Claire."

"Of course, Brian." As the three of them turned to exit the hall, Brian noticed a painting of the farmhouse. "Claire, if Kinney and his wife were so rich, why didn't they live in a mansion? Did they live here? This painting is of this house, isn't it?"

"You're right. But in Kinney's day this was an out house. No, not that kind of outhouse. The original Kinney home burned down years ago. The outlying houses were all that were left. None survive today except for this house and the barn. I had this painting framed myself a long time ago. But I always got the impression that it wasn't complete or that a piece of it is missing."

"I believe you're right. But I'd have to take a trip home and to Joan's house to be sure. I remember an old painting that hung in the den or what should have been a den. Jack used it mainly to hide in when he wanted to smoke. The painting was of a great house but it was so dirty I don't remember the details."

"Brian, maybe we can rescue the painting when we go home. I know a good restorer."

"I'll think about it, Sunshine. I think it's time for us to go, we've taken up enough of your time, Claire."

"Brian, it's late. You can't drive back to Pittsburgh now."

"Is there a decent hotel nearby?"

"We have plenty of room here. Please stay. I have more photos and documents you may be interested in. We can talk more tomorrow after a good night's sleep."

"We can't impose on you and John."

"It's not an imposition. Besides I have a feeling John may want to go out. I worry that he goes out alone all the time."

"No woman in his life?"

"That's the problem. There are too many women in his life. I never know who I'm talking to on the phone when they call for him."

***************************************

Sitting in the screen porch Brian and John got to know one another a little better as Claire and Justin talked some more about the Kinney past.

"So, big bro, Claire says you like the ladies. Lots of ladies."

"Yeah, what's it to you. You're a fag, what would you know about it?"

"A lot more than you think."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Let me ask you something first. How many women do you sleep with everyday?"

"Everyday? I'm on the road most of the time. I usually hook up on the weekends. Why?"

"From the time I was about twenty up until a few years ago I would do about one to two tricks a night. More on weekends."

"Tricks?"

"Having sex, 'sleeping' with someone."

"Every night?" Brian nodded. "More on the weekends?" Brian nodded again.

"Shit, that's a lot of sex."

"It's a difficult job but someone had to do it. And I had no reason to stop. And everything to prove, to myself. I only say this because it doesn't mean shit. Men, women, both, you're kidding yourself if you think all that sex is a satisfying way to live. It's not. Take it from your very experienced little brother."

"Fuck."

"Exactly."

"What happened a few years ago? You said up until a few years ago you did..."

"Tricks."

"Yeah."

"Justin happened. We're not monogamous, I'm not ready for that but I don't do it as much. Need to keep up my strength for Justin. The boy's insatiable. Claire's concerned about you, that's all."

"She's my mother; she can't help it. I haven't met the right woman, yet."

"Or the right man. Don't give me that look. My gaydar is usually right. I was a little slow on the uptake today because I was distracted. Don't tell me that you haven't experimented, taken a walk on the dark side?"

"No, I haven't and I don't intend to. I'm straight."

"Sure you are. You're as straight as I am."

John stood up, glaring at Brian. Brian hid his flinch well.

"The farm, Kinney. What are you going to do with the farm? I don't care about myself. I can get an apartment or a shack anywhere I want. This place is the only home my mother has ever known. Jack is dead; she has no hope and no right to this place. I repeat, what do you intend to do?"

Upon hearing her son shouting, Claire, followed by Justin, ran out to the porch. "What's all the shouting about?"

"Brian, are you okay?"

"I'm fine, Justin. Brother John wants to know my intentions."

"Your what?"

"He wants to know what I'm going to do about the deed to the farm." Facing Claire, Brian took the deed out of his pocket and pressed it into her hands. "If you have a lawyer, call him. I'll sign the deed over to you. I'm really a city boy. Too quiet for me. Justin has a lot of allergies. If we stay much longer, he'll be sneezing his nose off. But I'd like visitation rights. Maybe bring Gus here."

Claire looked down at the deed in her hand, then drew Brian into a tight hug. Overwhelmed, Claire was unable to speak. Feeling the same, Brian silently returned the hug.

"John, before it gets too dark, would you show me the barn?"

"The barn? It's just an old barn." Justin rolled his eyes at John and nodded toward Claire and Brian who were still indulging in their Kodak moment. Justin and John walked to the barn giving Claire and Brian time to recover.

"Justin, can I ask you something personal?"

"Sure."

"When did you know?"

"Know what?"

"That you were gay."

"I don't know, maybe about twelve. Didn't do anything about it until I was seventeen. Why?"

"And Brian? When did he know?"

"I think he had his first experience at fourteen."

"Fourteen? Shit and he said he does tricks?"

"Yeah, a regular stud. He's cut down, a lot. John, why all these questions about knowing if you're gay or not. Are you gay?"

"Brian seems to think so. Says his radar is never wrong."

"That's gaydar and yeah, he's never wrong."

"Fucking hell." Justin was touched by the similarities between the brooding John and a brooding Brian. Justin hugged John to comfort him. John, who had grown up with a loving and demonstrative parent, gratefully accepted the embrace. Until the tornado named Brian Kinney entered the barn.