BRIAN 

When Justin and Daphne arrived at the house I asked Daphne to watch the boys so Justin and I could talk. I wanted to talk to him alone, about the boys and about us. We left the kids with her and started walking the grounds.

“How much property surrounds the house?” He asks me. 

“Five acres, I bought the property behind me that hadn’t been developed yet.” I tell him. 

“What made you buy it?” I ask him. 

“It was a lot of things. I didn’t want everyone constantly coming over all the time. I wanted a place where Gus and I could stay, somewhere that had more than one bedroom. Mostly I could think here, without all the people around.” I tell him. 

“It’s a great place, my first thought when I saw it was that if I had seen it first I would have bought it.” He tells me.

“Justin we need to talk about us and the kids.” I tell him.

“I don’t know how it could work Brian. I live in New York now and you still live here.” He tells me.

“If you need to be there, I can be there too.” I tell him.

“I don’t necessarily need to be there, it’s just been my home for eight years.” He tells me.

“I want to be able to see Jacob more than every other week or weekend. He’s had eleven years without me around, I don’t want another day to go by that I’m not with my son.” I tell him.

“What are you asking me?” I tell him.

“I’m asking for a compromise, is there anything keeping you in New York right now?” I ask him.

“With it being summer, no, but when school starts we have to be where he is going to attend school.” Justin tells me.

“This Warhol thing, is it something you can do here?” I ask him.

“If I bring my computer and art supplies, yes.” He tells me.

“Before I ask you to do that, you need to understand that you don’t get to run off when I do something that upsets you unless you talk to me first.” I tell him.

“Brian,when I left it was because I really thought you wanted Michael. It wasn’t just what I saw at the comic shop, but having to watch you kiss him when we were out. We agreed that there was no kissing on the lips but if Michael wanted you to, you did. Then having to hear you and Michael constantly say you love each other when you told me you couldn’t love me. It all just came to a head when I had to see you with Michael in the shop. It wasn’t some innocent kiss, it was what I thought was only something you and I did. It was the only thing I felt was mine at the time.” He tells me.

“It was a stupid thing to do, but you should have waited to confront me about what you saw.” I tell him.

“Brian, we didn’t talk to each other about stuff like that, you would have told me it wasn’t my business.” He tells me.

“So running away was your answer?” I ask him.

“At the time, I was afraid that if I stayed I’d have not said anything, until you told me to go. I felt like the wives in my mother’s circle, the ones who know their husbands cheat but act like it never happens just to keep the husband.” He tells me.

“Justin, it wasn’t about you, I stupidly thought that Michael needed to see he would never be more than a trick.” I tell him.

“You couldn’t just tell him that?” Justin asks me.

“I should have, but like the saying goes, hindsight is twenty/twenty. I wanted my best friend to stop acting like the world was coming to an end because I never wanted to fuck him.” I tell Justin.

“Yeah, but you can’t put the moves on someone who wanted you and then say ‘just kidding’. I might have acted like a child and ran away, but you and Michael were playing childish games too. Shit, I’m sorry I shouldn’t have said that.” Justin tells me.

“Why, because it’s true? Deb told me that I can’t string Michael along then yank the rug out just so we stay friends. She wasn’t happy with either of us when you disappeared and Ben made sure she knew why he was leaving. Good ole Ben wasn’t going to leave without telling Mom what assholes Michael and I are.” I tell him.

“If I tell you something, will you promise not to get upset?” Justin asks me.

“I can’t promise, but I’ll try.” I tell him.

“Ben lives in New York now.” He tells me.

“Why would that upset me?” I ask him.

“It shouldn’t, but he and I are friends now. When I moved to New York, I ran into Ben at NYU, he teaches there and I was displaying on campus. He told me he left after Michael told him you and Michael wanted to be together.” He tells me.

“So he wanted to make sure you didn’t have a reason to come back. I guess he’s still bitter about the whole thing.” I tell Justin.

“Ben isn’t your number one fan, but he was in love and felt cheated on.” Justin tells me.

“Ben knew I didn’t want anything to do with Michael. I told him when he showed up at my loft.” I tell Justin. 

“I wasn’t telling you this so you could defend yourself, but because Ben and Jacob do things together when I need a babysitter.” Justin tells me.

“Do you and Ben do things together?” I ask him, trying to keep the jealousy from showing.

“Ben has dinner with us once a week, but that’s all we do.” He tells me.

“Ben could have told you that I never wanted Michael, and I could have known Jacob sooner.” I tell him.

“Ben and I agreed not to talk about you two. I made him stop after he told me he and Michael broke up. I didn’t let him say anything else about it.” Justin answers.

“You really tried to shut me out of your life didn’t you?” I ask him.

“Seeing you and Michael together almost destroyed me Brian. It’s why I cut off all contact with everyone you know. I know Deb well enough to know that she would have tried to tell me things I didn’t think I could handle hearing. Emmett and Ted are your friends, not mine. In a way, shutting you out kept me from falling apart everyday.” He tells me.

“Justin you're one of the strongest people I know. You might have been hurt but you went on and took care of yourself and our son.” I tell him.

“I am now but I wasn’t, not when I left. It was hard getting over you.” He tells me.

“Are you over me?” I ask him.

“I’m not the love sick kid who expects happily ever after, but I have a feeling I could never get over you completely.” He tells me.

“I don’t want you to get over me at all.” I tell him.