BRIAN 

“We might have to wait a second.” I tell him. 

“More like a few months.” He tells me. 

“My stamina isn’t that bad.” I joke with him, because I want him to tell me that he wants this. 

“I was talking about a baby.” He tells me. 

“Are you sure?” I ask him. 

“I want us to do this together.” He tells me. 

“Then we need to find out if I can still father a child. If not, there's always my sample in storage.” I tell him. 

“Why did you store it?” He asks me. 

“I wanted the possibility to exist. I didn’t want to not have the option one day.” I tell him. 

“Then let's find out if you need it, we can get tested and make sure there's nothing else to worry about.” He tells me.

“You've been tested and it's been a year, right?” I ask him. 

“Yeah, they came back clean.” He tells me. 

“Then we just wait for my results.” I tell him. 

“Six months isn't really long.” He tells me. 

“Four.” I tell him. 

“You haven't been with anyone in two months?” He asks me. 

“I've haven't had sex in four, just a couple blow jobs.” I tell him. 

“It will give us time to get everything settled.” He tells me. 

“Justin, for me the minute you moved in it was settled.” I tell him.

“I just want the kids to be comfortable with a new baby.” He tells me.

“They’ll love a baby, as much as we will. Justin we don’t have to wait, even if I can father more children, the sample is there.” I tell him.

“I want all the bells and whistles. I want to know that we are making a child. If we need to use it, then we do.” He tells me.

“Make sure it’s a girl this time.” I tell him.

“I’ll get right on it, but you know you determine that.” I tell him.

“Maybe I should carry the baby so I can blame you if we get another boy.” I tell him.

“You’d really carry my baby?” He asks me.

“If you wanted me to, I would.” I tell him.

“But do you want to? It was amazing to feel Jacob grow inside me.” He tells me.

“I don’t really know if I want to, I just wanted the offer on the table.” I tell him.

“You're not offering because you think you might not be able to father one?” He asks me.

“I have a way to father a child, I just don’t want you to feel like you have to be the one to carry the baby.” I tell him.

“I don’t have a business to run, so it makes sense that I do it.” He tells me.

“Let’s just find out and decide when we actually do it.” I tell him.

“I love you, for offering to lose your perfect waist for our baby.” Justin tells me.

“Wait, you mean I have to gain weight? I want to be the guy who never looks pregnant but pops out a kid ten minutes later.” I jokingly tell him.

“Those people don’t exist. Man, I turned into a butterball.” He tells me.

“Tell me about it.” I tell him, wanting to know how it was for him to be pregnant.

“I couldn’t figure out why I was eating everything that smelled good. I went for a physical for school and got to find out you left me with a parting gift.” He tells me.

“Did you have any problems?” I ask him.

“Not really, I mean there was the diabetes, but I controlled my diet and didn’t have complications from it. It went away the day I had Jacob. I was paranoid about the medication that the doctors prescribed me for my allergies. I stopped talking some of them because the doctor couldn’t guarantee that they wouldn’t have side effects. I found out that I was taking things I didn’t need, so that was a good thing.” He tells me.

“I just wished I could’ve seen him being born.” I tell him.

“I need to call Daphne.” He tells me.

“Can we at least wait until you're pregnant.” I tell him.

“Just let me call Daphne, you’ll understand when she gets here.” He tells me.

JUSTIN

I realize I can give him this, it won’t change the fact that he wasn’t there but it’s more than he had. I call Daphne and ask her to bring the videos over. Brian deserves to see Jacob’s firsts. Daphne tells me she’ll be over with the CD’s.

“Daphne recorded the birth, if you want to see it. She also has every important event in Jacob’s life recorded.” I tell him.

Daphne shows up with the box and tells me that Brian and I need to watch it together. I put the CD of Jacob’s first ultrasound in. 

“He was sucking his thumb.” I tell Brian.

Brian walks to the big screen and touches Jacob’s face and traces his hand. When the heart beating starts, Brian stood at the side of the TV and put his ear to the speaker. 

“He was beautiful.” Brian stares at the image as it fades out. The next thing was me sitting in the bed at the hospital with monitors on me. Brian puts his hands over my stomach on the screen at the same time I was doing it on the video. The video shows me holding my mom’s hand as I was waiting for them to take Jacob. I forgot that I was talking about Brian to her.

“Mom, if anything happens to me, make sure Jacob goes to Brian.” I tell her.

“Justin, you're going to be fine.” She tells me.

“I just mean if anything happens I want Jacob to be with Brian.” I tell her.

“Well Justin, this little boy wants to meet you.” The doctor tells me and brings a crying Jacob to me.

“Oh god, he’s beautiful.” Mom tells me tears in her eyes.

“How could he not have been. He’s got the best parts of us.” I tell Jacob in the video.

Brian was glued to the screen watching as Jacob’s hand comes out of the blanket and Brian puts his hand over it. 

“Justin what are you going to name him?” Daphne asks from behind the camera.

“Jacob Kinney Taylor. It’s so you always know you're loved.” I tell Jacob.

When the screen fades, Brian pulls the CD out and heads to his computer. I watch as he puts it in to make a copy. Brian is watching it on the screen again. I pull one that I think he needs to see. I put it in the player and watch my son take his first steps. Brian comes up behind me and watches Jacob fall and pick himself up again. Jacob kept pulling himself until he made it across the room to me.

“I always thought he got that determination to do things from you.” I tell him.

“Well he was trying to get to you.” He whispers to me.

We watch the video as Jacob smiles with his cake at his feet.

“Happy Birthday, Baby.” I tell him in the video.

“DaDaDaDa” Jacob repeats as he smashes the cake with his hands.

We watch as Jacob picks up his hand and looks at me worried. I grabbed Jacob’s hand and put it in my mouth. Jacob looks at me then puts his other hand in his mouth and smiles my smile. Then face plants into his cake to all of us laughing. I feel Brian’s chest moving and hear him laughing at our son.

I let it play and turn to hug Brian, who is watching the screen. “I’m so sorry you missed this.” I whisper into his chest.

“I won’t miss it again.” He whispers as he kisses my head, watching Jacob the whole time.

“There are recordings of everything in that box, I can’t give you the years back, but I can give you a chance to see all the important parts.” I tell him.

“Justin, we made mistakes. WE, not just you. I have you and Jacob now, so let's make more important parts.” He tells me.

“We have you, so we have the important part.” I tell him.

Brian pulls the next CD out and puts it in. We spent the night watching Jacob grow up.

JOHN

I was sitting at the bar at Babylon when I see Ben walk in with some guy. I kept out of Brian and Justin’s interactions with Ben, because it wasn’t my business. I’m just glad he is with someone else.

“I couldn’t keep any of them.” Michael said from behind me.

“It’s your own fault.” I tell him.

“How did you not fall in love with Brian?” He seems genuinely curious.

“We were just having a good time, nothing more. If I had to choose, it would be my friend over the other things.” I tell him.

“I wish I could say the same.” He tells me.

“You could be the one Ben was with, instead of alone.” I tell him.

“I never loved him the way he deserved to be loved.” Michael watches Ben and the guy dance.

“It’s why you're here alone.” I tell him.

“So are you, but Brian didn’t seem to want anyone around but Justin.” He tells me.

“I’m alone because I want more than a one night stand. I want what they seem to have.” I tell him.

“Justin disappears for twelve years and for Brian, it’s like he was gone for a few minutes.” Michael tells me.

“Michael, Brian might not have been proclaiming his love for Justin from the roof tops, but hell, even I’ve heard Brian talk about Justin. Brian respected Justin for being proud of who he was.” I tell him.

“I was too busy hiding my life.” He tells me.

“I doubt it would have mattered, Justin was the one for him.” I tell him.

“Why are you being nice to me?” He asks me.

“I’m going to put it down to temporary insanity, because I think I’m breaking out in hives from all the talking about our feelings we’ve been doing.” I tell him.

“I’ll go, I guess I just wanted to be around people today.” He tells me.

“Why not stay, we can make fun of Ben’s date.” I tell him, plus I was bored.

“I can’t say a lot, the kid can at least dance without Ben showing him how to do it.” I tell him.

“What kind of gay man are you, you trash the new boy, not compliment him.” I tell him.

“I’m usually the one getting trashed on.” He tells me.

“Why not just get trashed, at least you can wake up feeling like utter shit for a reason.” I tell him and order shots for us.

“Where are Blake and Ted?” Michael asks as he downs the shot.

“They were decided to be old men and go home.” I tell him.

“So I was the last resort?” Michael asks as he takes the next shot.

“No, you just came up as I was feeling charitable.” I tell him and toast his shot.

“Not planning on looking for a hookup?” He asks me.

“I was actually kind of hungry.” I tell him.

“We could go to the diner, or raid my Ma’s kitchen.” He tells me.

“Did she cook lasagna? Cause man, Justin had some and it was good.” I tell him.

“She keeps it frozen.” He tells me.

Michael and I decide to stumble our way to Debs. Michael seems okay when I’m wasted, maybe that’s how Brian dealt with him. We tried to silently make our way into the kitchen, but the twat keep giggling.

“SHUUUUUSH, YOUR MOM COULD HEAR US.” I whisper to him.

“You're the one shouting, but here, hold this while I turn on the oven.” He dumps a huge pan in my arms.

“Are we going to eat all of this?” I smile at the thought.

“If Justin were here we would probably need twice as much.” He tells me without making Justin’s name sound like a curse.

“I can’t figure out where it goes on him.” I tell Michael.

“He’s one of the lucky ones.” He pats my chest and takes the pan.

We sit and watch the lasagna, Michael pours us some wine. He gulps it down and I figure why the hell not. When the lasagna was ready we grabbed forks to eat and I had to take Michael’s and show him how to hold it. 

“Want to watch the new Batman?” Michael picks up the food and stumbles to the living room.

“I really like the old one.” I tell him.

“Like the classic, or the updated ones?” He asks me.

“Updated, not a huge fan, but I’ll watch if they come on.” I tell him.

We sat around watching and eating, Deb came in and shook her head and cleaned up our mess.

“You might as well sleep here, you're in no shape to drive anywhere.” She tells us.

“Thanks Ma.” Michael tells her falling asleep.

“How did you end up with Michael tonight?” She asks me.

“I really couldn’t tell you, normally I would run away from him, but he was pleasant tonight. I hung out with him.” I tell her bewildered.