They were about to leave and head into the warmth of the diner when someone touched his arm.

“Brian?”

His blood ran cold and the sound of that voice saying his name had put him on edge. He didn't need this today.

Brian cleared his throat as he looked at Justin, “Hey, would you take him inside for me?” he asked quietly.

Justin looked at him worriedly but agreed. “Okay, we’ll grab a table.”

Brian wasn't sure why he did it, maybe he was being immature or even a little spiteful - but he didn't care, it was as though he couldn't stop himself. He reached for Justin, his hand tangled in the hair at the back of his head as he brought him in for a toe curling kiss - crushing their lips together passionately. If Justin was confused by what was happening, he didn't let on, but kissed back with just as much enthusiasm and need as Brian. What surprised him the most was just how much comfort he got from the kiss and from having Justin in his arms.

“We’ll see you inside,” Justin panted as he grabbed Gus’s hand and led the giggling little boy inside.

“Brian?”

Brian slowly turned around and licked his lips nervously, “Joan.”

There was an uncomfortable pause as they both just looked at each other, neither wanted to be the first to speak.

Joan gave her bucket to the gentleman collecting next to her and clasped her hands awkwardly over the front of her coat. “Was that…was that…?” she faltered.

He wasn't going to make it easy for her. If she wanted to know something, then she’d have to come right out and fucking ask him.

She could see he wasn't going to help her out, so she reluctantly continued. “Is that boy yours?”

“That boy is my son, yes - or were you referring to my partner, Justin? Because he’s mine too,” he told her proudly.

The look of disgust on her face was unmistakable. “I see.”

He scoffed. “I'm glad, it’s quite simple.”

“So, what happened to you?” She asked, without a trace of emotion in her voice as she nodded towards his crutches.

“I got hit by a car.”

Why was he still talking to her?

“I can’t say I'm surprised. The way you choose to live your life, it’s ungodly.”

“Ungodly?” he laughed bitterly, she really was a fucking piece of work.

“Yes, like some sort of perversion of nature, it’s disgusting and against God’s will,” she whispered, afraid that her friends collecting alongside her may overhear the disgusting way in which her son chooses to live his life. “A sign literally hit you with full force, Brian, and yet you still don't get it?"

“You think God hit me with a car to punish me?” He couldn't believe what he was hearing. Actually, he could, his mother had always been bat shit crazy.

“It’s not too late. You can still change. I know you can.”

“I can?” he asked, shoving his tongue in his cheek, afraid that he might say something he’d later regret.

Her eyes lit up with hope. “You’ll have to fight temptation. Be strong. Harden yourself.”

“Trust me, mother, I have no problem hardening myself - that wonderful partner of mine that you just met helps me out quite nicely with that,” he sneered.

Man, that felt good.

He watched as multiple emotions crossed her face. He knew he hadn't caught them all, but one he was sure of. Pure hatred.

He was done, he couldn't listen to any more of her sanctimonious bullshit. As he turned his head he could see Justin and Gus through the window of the diner, their heads huddled close together as they coloured in. That was where he was supposed to be, not out here in the freezing cold explaining himself to his God-fearing cunt of a mother.

“Brian, I can’t help you if you don’t start helping yourself,” she muttered.

He couldn't stop himself from laughing angrily in her face, when had she ever helped him? Where was she when his dear ol’ dad took him out into their garage and whipped him with his leather belt, marking him until he passed out from the pain? Or when his hands were wrapped so tightly around his throat he thought he’d die? She wouldn't be rushing to his side, checking he was okay, no, she would be sitting in their living room with a blank expression on her face as she knocked back glass after glass of cheap sherry.

“Enjoy praying for my soul,” growled Brian as he turned around and made his way into the diner. The warmth hit him as soon as he was through the door, and it was only then he realised how cold he’d been. His teeth started chattering and he rubbed his hands together fiercely as he tried to get warm.

As soon as Justin saw him walk in, he stood up, greeting him with one of his sunniest sunshine smiles, and he felt himself begin to warm up almost immediately.

“Hey.”

“Hey,” Brian smiled back, exhaustion suddenly taking hold.

“Is everything alright?” Justin asked when Brian slid into their booth.

Brian nodded sadly before he turned his attention to Gus.

“Hey, Sonny Boy, did you see all the books and toys over there?” he asked, pointing to the special children’s corner. “Why don’t you go and find some cool stuff and bring them back to the table?”

“Okay, Daddy,” Gus giggled excitedly as he ran off.

“Sorry about that,” Brian apologised. “Was he okay?”

Justin leaned forward and took Brian’s hand in his and stroked it softly. “Don’t be sorry,” he said smiling. “ I happen to love hanging out with Gus.”

“I think he’s smitten with you,” Brian laughed as he looked at their entwined hands and sighed heavily. “That was my mother.”

“I thought so.” Justin waited for Brian to continue.

“She’s a God-fearing, homophobic, selfish asshole.” Brian turned around to check on Gus, making sure his little ears weren’t picking up on what he was saying. “In fact, even calling her a mother is a massive exaggeration and an insult to actual mothers out there.”

Justin nodded sympathetically. “That must have been hard when she found out you were gay.”

Brian cleared his throat nervously, “I’d never actually told her.”

“Oh.”

“Until now…”

“Oh, shit,” Justin’s hand went up to his mouth in shock.

“Okay, um...,” Brian looked around to check on Gus once more, luckily he was being kept busy by the vast array of children's books on display in the corner. “This is a little awkward, what with, you know - everything between us. But I… I told her you were my partner. I'm really sorry if that makes you uncomf…”

Justin cut him off before he could finish apologising.

“Brian, it’s fine,” Justin laughed gently reaching for his hand once more. “Trust me, I get it.” And by the look on his face, he did, he got it.

“I don’t even know why I said it,” he admitted truthfully.

“I do,” Justin told him. “You wanted to show her that you’re happy. That you’re loved. You didn't have that growing up with her religion. But you have it now.”

Brian nodded. Of course, Justin would understand.

Gus bounced back over to their booth excitedly. “Daddy, Justin, look what I found, it’s a wholeeee book on dinsores.”

“Wow, that’s awesome, buddy,” Brian exclaimed happily, feeding off of Gus’s excitement.

“Yup, they tell you allllll about the T-Rex and the Stegsasorus.”

“The Stegosaurus,” Brian corrected gently.

Gus rolled his eyes and looked at Justin. “I said Stegsasorus, didn't I?”

Justin chuckled, mouthed sorry to Brian and ruffled Gus’s hair, “Yeah, you did.”

Brian signalled the waitress to let her know that that they were ready to order. “What can I get you handsome boys for lunch?”

“Can I order for myself, Daddy?” Gus whispered loudly, which made all the adults laugh.

“Go for it, Sonny Boy.”

“Please, may I have a turkey samich and an apple juice.”

The waitress crouched down so that she was eye-level with him. “You sure can. What bread would you like with that, sweetheart?” Gus looked at Brian.

“Whole wheat,” whispered Brian.

“Whole wheat, please,” he grinned proudly.

The waitress smiled back before standing back up. “And what about you?” She asked Justin.

“I’ll have the bacon cheeseburger, a side of fries and an extra thick chocolate shake, please.”

She turned to Brian. “And for you, sir?”

“I’ll have the tossed house salad and a black coffee...please.”

Once she had all their orders written down, she left them to it.

“Daddy,” Gus said sadly. You didn't order a turkey samich like you always do. Now we won't have the same for lunch.”

Brian wrapped his arm around Gus and kissed his head. “I'm sorry, how about we share?”

Gus nodded happily and went back to reading his book.

When the waitress brought over their food, Brian kept his promise and split his salad with Gus, who in return, gave him half of his turkey sandwich.

“Now we’re the same,” Gus giggled as he looked at their matching plates proudly. “Samesies.”

“Samesies,” Brian repeated happily, loving how easy it was to please his kid.

Brian scrapped out the mayonnaise from his sandwich before he took a bite. “Mmm, I didn’t realise how hungry I was. How’s yours?” he asked, as he eyed up Justin’s burger.

Justin moaned appreciatively as he took another huge bite. “It’s so good,” he said, once he’d swallowed. “I haven’t had a good burger in ages,” he said, as he took a fry and dipped it into his chocolate milkshake before he popped it into his mouth.

Brian couldn't hide the disgusted look on his face as he watched Justin pop the fry into his mouth. “Did you just…” he pointed to the fries on Justin’s plate, “dip that in your shake?”

Justin’s cheeks turned the rosiest of pinks as he looked up at Brian. “Yeah?”

“I thought so. You’re disgusting,” teased Brian.

“Try it,” Justin said, as he took a fry and dipped it into the thick chocolatey mixture before thrusting it towards Brian.

“No. I think I'm good,” he laughed, pulling his head as far away from the offending fry as he could.

Gus reached for it eagerly. “Can I try it?”

Justin looked at Brian to make sure it was okay.

Brian just scoffed. “Sure, go for it, Sonny Boy,” he said, cringing as he watched his son take the chocolate coated fry and devour it with gusto.

Gus’s eyes got huge. “That was sooooo yummy.”

“Ha,” Justin grinned triumphantly, as he took another fry and dipped just the tip of it into the shake. “Try it, if you don’t like it, you can spit it out.”

Brian shook his head stubbornly; there was no way in hell he was going to try that disgusting concoction.

“Try it, Daddy. You just gotta. It’s like dinner and dessert allllll at the same time.”

Brian reluctantly took the fry from Justin and very slowly brought it up to his lips.

“Whenever you’re ready,” Justin teased before he started to fake snore, which caused Gus to break out into a fit of hysterics.

Brian hesitantly popped the fry into his mouth and was amazed at just how much he enjoyed it. The salt from the fry mixed with the sweetness of the chocolate was the perfect combination.

“Not bad.”

Grinning widely, Justin said, “You love it.”

Reaching for another fry, Brian dipped more of it into the shake this time. “Saying I love it might be taking it a bit far, but, yes, I like it,” he admitted.

Justin made no attempt to hide his smug smile. “I knew you would. See, Brian? You just have to dive in and try things, even if you’re scared. Sometimes it really pays off.”

“Yes, Daddy!” Gus agreed enthusiastically, “You gotta try things! Mommy made me try salad and I really like it now!”

Brian stifled a laugh as he smiled at the little boy affectionately. Glancing at Justin, he could see the younger man was doing the same.

And seeing that smile directed at his son just made him fall a little bit harder.

******

It was nearing four by the time they were ready to leave the diner. After they’d eaten their lunch, Justin and Gus shared a big bowl of ice cream and then they’d sat talking, reading stories from the book corner and coloring in pictures from Gus’s trusty Frozen colouring book. It was probably one of the nicest afternoons Brian had had in awhile.

“Thanks for lunch, Brian. You didn't have to,” Justin said with a yawn as he slid out from the booth and stretched. The t-shirt he was wearing slid up a little, revealing his deliciously flat stomach and Brian found it extremely difficult to concentrate on getting Gus ready to go.

Brian couldn't take his eyes off of that tempting strip of Alabaster skin, that was peeking out of the bottom of Justin’s tee as he lifted his arms tiredly. “Hmm - oh, no problem,” Brian smiled, embarrassed to have been caught staring.

“Are you ready to go?” Brian asked his little boy, as he zipped up Gus’s winter coat.

Gus nodded tiredly as he held his hands out for Brian to put his mittens on. “Can we do this again, Daddy?”

“We do this every week,” chuckled Brian, as he ruffled Gus’s hair.

Gus wrapped his arm around Justin’s waist. “I meant with Justin.”

“Maybe if you ask him nicely,” Brian smiled down at him, “he’ll come out with us again.”

“Will you, Justin?” Gus asked as he wrapped his arm around Justin’s waist even tighter.

“Of course, I will,” Justin promised. “And maybe next time we’ll get your daddy to order his own ice cream, so he doesn't steal ours. What do you say?”

Gus giggled.”He allllwaaaays does that.”

“Stop telling tales,” Brian laughed heartily.

Justin looked outside as he put on his coat. “Hey, she’s still out there,” he told Brian quietly. “Are you going to be okay?”

Brian sighed. “Yeah, the cab is meeting us at the end of the block.” and I just want to get past her as fast as I can,” he laughed bitterly as he looked down at his gimp leg.

“You've got this,” Justin smiled sweetly at him.

Once they were all ready to go, they followed Gus outside, who insisted on holding the diner door open for them.

Brian didn't even have to look over at her to know that Joan was watching his every move the moment he stepped outside. He took a deep breath. He could do this.

Brian lifted Gus’s chin up, so the boy was looking at him. “Don’t run off, okay, Sonny Boy?”

“Yes Daddy,” Gus promised, as he accepted the hand that Justin held out to him.

As they began walking towards the corner and in the direction of Saint Joan, Brian could feel Justin’s hand running up and down his back.

“What are you doing?” he smirked.

“Just showing my partner some much-deserved love and attention,” Justin replied, with a cheeky wink.

Brian wasn't stupid. He knew it was just a show that Justin was putting on. He couldn't say that he didn't appreciate it. The look on Joan’s face was immensely satisfying, even if it did make Brian feel a little bitter over having such a hateful wench for a mother. But even though the caresses Brian felt over his back were simulated and only an example of what he might feel in a relationship with Justin, it didn't keep him from experiencing the rare feeling of butterflies fluttering around in his stomach.

Justin’s hand remained firmly on Brian’s back until they reached the cab waiting for them at the corner.

“Thanks,” Brian said softly once he’d helped Gus climb into the back of the car, buckling him up.

Justin looked at him and smiled affectionately. He didn't need to say anything because his eyes said it all, they told Brian everything he needed to know. That he was safe, that he had his back no matter what, and most of all, that he cares. It had been a long time since Brian had felt this comfortable with someone. He has his friends – and Deb, but that always felt different - like they’re somehow obligated to like him because of how long they have known him and because of the shit they know he’s been through. Justin likes him, for him.

The cab ride to Lindsay and Melanie’s didn't take long. Gus had nestled himself into Brian’s side and was already getting upset that his afternoon with his Daddy and Justin was coming to an end.

“Da-ddy, I don’t wa-want to go ho-home,” he cried.

Resting his chin on top of Gus’s head, Brian breathed his son in. “I
know, buddy.”

“Its b-been s-so f-fun. Hasn’t i-it been f-fun, Da-daddy?”

“It’s been a lot of fun,” he told Gus honestly.

As much as spending the day with Gus was one of Brian’s favourite things to do, saying goodbye to him was the worst.

The moment the cab pulled into the Muncher’s driveway Gus’s tears began to flow more freely. Brian unbuckled his seatbelt and pulled Gus onto his lap.

“Its okay, Sonny Boy,” Brian soothed, kissing his head.

“I- I'm s-sorry f-for c-crying, Da-daddy. I kn-know I-I’m a b-big b-boy.”

He hated seeing his boy cry like this.

“It’s okay to cry, Gus. Even big boys can get sad.”

“Mama says only babies cry. I’m n-not a b-baby.”

Brian shivered as he remembered Jack yelling those exact words to him when he was around Gus’s age - “only babies cry.”

He was out in their backyard, playing quietly with his Tonka Truck when he fell over, cutting his knee open. Tears slid down his face and blood seeped from the wound, splattering his favourite shoes. He thought his daddy would be proud that he tried so hard not to cry, to be a big boy, but his knee stung so much that he couldn't stop them from falling.

“Get your crying ass up to your room, little boy. I don't want to hear that shit. Only babies cry. Are you a baby?"

He was going to fucking kill Melanie for making his son believe that it wasn't okay to cry. No fucking way was he going to allow his son to be emotionally stunted the way he was.

Gus tapped his arm; bringing him back to the present. “Da-daddy, I – I want you to c-carry me in-inside.”

“Fuck!” Brian muttered angrily under his breath. His god-damn fucking knee.

“I… I can carry him in, if you’d like?” Justin offered.

Before Brian could respond, Gus had climbed into Justin’s arms and burrowed his face in the crook of Justin’s neck.

“Shh, it’s okay,” Justin soothed, as he climbed out of the cab.

“Keep the meter running,” Brian told the cabbie, as he struggled with his crutches.

They made their way up the stairs to Mel and Lindsay’s front door and Brian couldn't help but smile at the sight of Gus, with his legs and arms wrapped tightly around Justin. He looked like a little monkey, clinging on for dear life.

The door opened before they’d even knocked, confirming Brian’s suspicions that both Lindsay and Melanie had watched them arrive through the living room window.

“Hi, Lindsay… Melanie,” he greeted, the look on Mel’s face making him uncomfortable.

Lindsay smiled; unfortunately, the same couldn't be said for Mel, who had scoffed loudly.

“This is Justin,” Brian explained.

“Hey, Brian, Justin. Hi, Gussy!” Lindsay cooed, as she tried to pry her son away from his new friend.

“Nooo,” Gus sobbed, as he clung to Justin tightly.

“We won’t be long,” Brian turned and called out to the cabbie who was waiting patiently for them in the car as he pushed his way passed both women. “Justin, would you mind looking after Sonny Boy for a minute while I talk to the ladies in the kitchen?”

Justin smiled awkwardly. “Sure.”

“What’s going on?” Lindsay asked nervously. Mel didn't even wait to see what this was about and was already sat waiting for them in the next room.

“Kitchen,” he said.

Lindsay nodded, “Okay. Hey, Gus, why don’t you show Justin your new truck?” she suggested – watching as her little boy chatted away happily about his new toy.

“What the fuck is going on?” Mel asked the moment they were all sat around the kitchen table. “And how fucking dare you bring a trick along when you’re supposed to bonding with your kid!”

“Keep your voice down!” Brian hissed. “For your information, Justin is not a trick. I haven’t done that shit in ages, Mel, and you know that ” he found it difficult to keep the hurt out of his voice when he answered. “And even if I was still tricking, do you really think I’d do that shit around my kid? Do you think that fucking little of me?”

“Brian, I'm sure she didn't mean…”

“Lindsay, stop. I did,” Melanie said quietly. “I did mean it – and, you’re right. I'm sorry.”

Well, that was a fucking first.

“I haven’t done that – tricked, since before Adam.” Why was he even telling them this? It was none of their fucking business.

Melanie nodded. “So, who is he?” she asked, getting straight to the point was a specialty of hers.

“A friend.” That’s all they were getting.

“A friend?” Lindsay smirked. “I see.”

“Yes, a friend.” He didn't want to tell them more. Why should he?

“So,” Melanie asked. “Why are we hiding out in the kitchen while your friend is in there with Gus?”

“Gus cried in the car.”

Lindsay looked confused. “Okay…”

He looked at Mel coldly, “did you tell him that big boys don’t cry?”

“What?” She asked. “Where did this come from?”

“You heard me, he apologised for crying. Told me you said that big boys don’t cry. That only babies cry.”

Melanie laughed, “Are you fucking serious, Brian?”

“Did you fucking say it or not?”

“I – yes. He was getting his teeth checked at the dentist and he started to cry.”

“So you told him only babies cried?” He couldn't fucking believe this.

“No. That’s not how it was at all,” Lindsay stepped in to defend Mel.

“We’d had a conversation in the car before we got there, and Gus had said he wanted to be a big boy when the dentist checked his teeth. So when he started to cry, I asked him, ‘are you going to be a baby or a big boy?’ There was nothing malicious in my words, Brian. Christ.”

Brian put his head in his hands. “Just - don’t say that to him, okay?”

“What’s the big fucking deal?”

“Just don’t, okay? Please.”

He hated that he sounded so fucking vulnerable, but this was important and he’d do anything to ensure that Gus wasn’t forced to hide his emotions the same way he was; he’s a kid for Christ sakes.

“Brian?” Lindsay asked as she pulled her chair closer to him.

He could feel his cheeks flush as he spoke. “Promise me, Linds...”

“Okay,” she smiled sadly as she reached for his hand, patting it gently.

“I'm just going to go and say goodbye to, Gus and then we’ll be out of your hair,” Brian said, as he squeezed Lindsay’s hand.

“Thanks,” said Melanie. “He looks like he had a really nice time with you both this afternoon.”

“He did.”

Brian stood up and made his way into the living room, where Justin and Gus were both lying on their tummies playing with a bright red fire truck.

“I'm the fireman, okay?”

“Then who am I?” Justin asked. His face lit up into a huge grin when Brian walked in.

Gus brought his finger up to his mouth as if he was thinking. “Hmm, you’re the kitty cat that is stuck up in the tree, okay?”

“A cat?” Justin scoffed teasingly.

“Yes, a cat. All you have to do is meow. You can do it,” Gus encouraged him. “It’s easy. Try it.”

Justin looked up at Brian and they shared a smile. “Meow… meooooow.”

“Weeee woooooo weeee woooooo,” Gus screamed, as he drove the fire truck around the room at lightning speed. “It’s okay, kitty.”

Brian watched as his son rescued the ‘kitty’ and then critiqued Justin on his acting skills.

“You didn't sound very much like a kitty cat, but it’s okay,” smiled Gus.

“Hey, Gus, can you come give me a hug and then say goodbye to Justin as we’re leaving.”

Gus ran towards him and wrapped his arms around his legs, carefully avoiding his injured knee. “Bye, Daddy.”

“Bye, Sonny Boy. I’ll call you tonight at bedtime, okay?” Brian promised, as he leaned down and gave the little boy a kiss.

Gus nodded before he ran towards Justin, throwing himself into his arms. “Thank you for playing with me.”

“You’re welcome,” Justin told him. “I had a lot of fun.”

“Me too.”

“Gus, would you like to help me make dinner?” Melanie asked, sensing the little boy would need distracting so they could leave without a serious meltdown.

“Okay, mama.”

Melanie took the little boy’s hand. “It was nice meeting you, Justin,” she said as she and Gus disappeared into the kitchen.

Lindsay walked them to the front door. “Thanks for today, Brian.”

Brian leaned in and gave her a kiss on the cheek. “You don’t have to thank me every time I take him out, Linds,” he laughed. “I love spending time with him.”

“I know you do,” she said. “It was lovely to meet you, Justin.”

“You too,” Justin grinned, as he shook her hand.

Once the door was closed behind them, Justin gasped.

“What? What’s wrong?” Brian asked worriedly.

“I forgot you left the meter running…”

Brian rolled his eyes. Don’t worry about it.”

“Are you doing anything this evening?” Justin asked as they walked towards the waiting car.

“Nothing, why?”

“I didn't know if maybe you wanted to hang out?” Justin asked him shyly. “I was just going to order a pizza and watch a movie, but you’re more than welcome to join me.”

It had been a long day, and the offer to spend the evening hanging out with Justin was impossible to refuse.

“I’d love to.”

****

“We’re here,” Justin told him, as the cab came to a stop outside a beautiful row of Brownstones.

Brian paid the cab driver and followed Justin up the steps to his apartment.

“Are you okay?” Justin asked as he turned to see if Brian needed any help. The stairs were steep and probably not the easiest of things to climb with crutches.

“I'm alright. I'm just tired,” he admitted.

Justin rubbed his arm. “Come on,” he said, as he unlocked the door.

The place was gorgeous and nothing at all like Brian imagined it would look after seeing the outside. It was a two level apartment with an open floor plan and a beautiful spiral staircase leading up to the second floor.

“Would you like a tour?” Justin asked as he hung up their jackets.

“Of course,” he smiled. “Is it leaving now?”

Justin looked at the non-existent watch on his wrist. “You’re just in time,” he grinned. “Okay, so here we have the kitchen. Please note the fancy breakfast bar, a major selling point when I moved in. I had visions of espresso and The New Yorker in the morning, maybe with some fresh fruit. So far, I've just used it as a place to sort my mail.”

“But it looks good for that,” Brian laughed.

“It is, and of course, it would help if I had an espresso machine… or a subscription to The New Yorker.”

“Bar stools would also help,” Brian teased.

“Yes. Anyway, moving on, here’s the living room. I apologise for the mess, but I'm currently reorganising my books by genre, instead of by author,” he explained. “Do not laugh at me,” he added warningly.

“Never,” Brian smirked. “Okay, maybe just a little bit.”

“Shut up.”

“I just noticed your DVD’s are organised the same way,” Brian laughed. “You’re such a dork.”

Justin’s cheeks flushed with embarrassment, but he continued on with the tour.

“The solarium…or as we say in the real world: teeny tiny, glassed-in balcony that isn't really good for anything. Observe the sick plant hospital. The basil plant over there is my newest patient He almost didn't make it.”

Brian pressed his nose up to the glass. “Hey there, sick plants. Feel better, you guys.”

Justin smiled at his silliness. “Right, now over there,” he pointed. “You’ll notice two doors. Behind one is my washer and dryer, the other is an actual closet. Guess which is which.”

Brian considered this for a second. “The one on the right is the washer and dryer?”

“Ha, no, it’s the one on the left. But I open the wrong door every time,” Justin laughed. “I don’t know why.”

“Okay, it’s official. I'm over you,” Brian chuckled. “I’ll just show myself out.”

It was so fucking easy to make Justin blush and he was beginning to think that he was addicted to doing it.

Justin hit his arm lightly. “Rude,” he laughed. “And then over here is a bathroom.”

“Oh good,” Brian breathed out. “I admit I was slightly worried that I would have to attempt the stairs if nature called.”

Justin looked at him, and the intensity of his stare gave Brian goosebumps. “I would have helped you,” he told him, his voice laced with honesty.

“I know you would have - but I don’t want the first time you see my dick to be when I'm taking a piss,” he smirked.

There’s a tiny part of him that sensed that maybe he should have been embarrassed by what he had just said, but it’s not like all his cards weren't already on the table. Justin knows how he feels, and there is no use hiding it.

Justin started to laugh and any sense of shame Brian felt by his words went out the window.

“Good point,” he grinned.” And then upstairs is my bedroom and en suite, which I have just had remodelled, so it now includes a giant soaker tub. It’s gorgeous. Ask me how many times I've taken a bath since I have had it installed. Go on.”

Brian wrinkled his nose. “I'm guessing none?”

“Ding ding ding, you are correct.”

Brian shook his head in mock disgust. “What a waste.”

Fuck fuck fuck, now I can’t get the image out of my head of him…of us soaking in his tub.

“I know. I have a shower every morning, and I always think I’ll have a bath when I get home from work – but I'm usually too tired,” he sighed.

“I’d kill for a bath, especially now with my knee - actually” he laughed, “ I don’t know if I’d be able to get out on my own. So maybe not.”

“As soon as you’re better on stairs, you can test drive mine out for me if you’d like.”

Brian raised his eyebrows cheekily. “Are you offering to give me a bath?”

“No,” chuckled Justin. “I'm offering you my bath.

“Shame, I was looking forward to someone washing my back.”

“Your back?” He grinned playfully, “somehow I don’t think you want me washing just your back.”

“Hey, I'm offended,” Brian teased. “I do like having my back washed, though – you know, for future reference,” he winked.

“Should I take notes?” Justin laughed.

Brian pulled his bottom lip into his mouth. ”It might be best; you never know when I might test you.”

“Oooh. I’ll make sure to pay attention to everything you say from now on then,” Justin teased back. “Hey, you want a beer?”

“Sure,” Brian said, as he flopped down onto the couch and stretched out his legs.

Justin walked over and handed him his drink and placed his on the coffee table. “I'm just going to change into something more comfortable. I’d offer you something…but I don’t think anything I own will fit you,” he laughed.

“Well, I do wear adult sizes now,” Brian joked playfully.

Justin’s mouth fell open in shock before he started laughing. “You’re an asshole.”

“I try my best,” Brian smiled, as he watched Justin run up the stairs to get changed.

“You can pick a DVD or see what’s on the TV if you want,” Justin called down. “I’ll only be a minute.”

Brian reached for the remote, turned on the TV and hit the DVR button. He was curious as to what Justin enjoyed watching and my, God, what he saw caused him to laugh hysterically.

“What’s so funny?” He heard Justin yell from upstairs.

“You,” Brian replied, choking back laughter.

“What? Why?” Justin asked curiously, as he ran down the stairs; his chest bare and his t-shirt and hoodie in his hand.

“Hmm?” Brian asked having suddenly forgotten what was so funny. His eyes wandered over the lean body in front of him. The deliciously flat stomach, the light blonde happy trail (leading to, what Brian believes is probably the happiest place on Earth) and the rosy pink nipples all seemed to make his mouth water and his cock stiffen in his jeans.

Justin flushed under the intense stare but made no effort to put his shirt on. “What were you laughing at?” He asked again, as he took a seat next to Brian, and turned his body towards him.

“Oh, urm,” Brian snapped out of his daze and smiled.”The shit you watch on TV.”

“Like what?” Justin asked as he snatched the remote out of Brian’s hands.

“Jane the Virgin.”

“Have you ever even watched it?”

“No, and I don’t intend to.” Brian laughed.

Justin shook his head. “Then you cannot judge me on this one. It’s so good and I can’t help but fall in love with everyone on it. I bet you’d like it.”

“I don’t think so. But, okay, I’ll give you that one. What about Swamp People? Don’t tell me you have a thing for men with no teeth?”

Justin wrinkled up his nose. “Eww, no. I just find it interesting.”

“Alright, I’ll give you that… but, this one, this one loses you points, Sunshine. Dance Moms. Really?”

Justin covered his face in embarrassment. “I admit, that one's a little cheesy.”

“A little?” Brian joked, as he placed his hand on Justin’s leg and gave his knee a friendly squeeze.

“Okay, a lot cheesy. What are your guilty pleasures when it comes to TV, then?”

“I don’t really watch much television,” Brian admitted. “I tend to stick to DVD’s. I liked The West Wing.”

“Brian, that show is so old,” Justin laughed.

“Have you ever seen it? Josh Lyman was hot,” he laughed.

“And old,” Justin teased, knowing full well it would wind Brian up.

Brian squeezed Justin’s knee, this time not so gently. “Watch it, Sunshine. He was probably the same age I am now.”

“Which is how old?” Justin asked seriously.

“How old do you think I am?”

Justin stuck his tongue out cheekily as he answered. “Positively ancient.”

“You little shit,” Brian laughed, as he reached for the t-shirt still in Justin’s hand and smacked him with it.

“I'm kidding, I'm kidding,” Justin squealed as Brian threw the t-shirt down onto the floor and began to tickle Justin’s sides. “I’m sorry.”

“What are you sorry about?” Brian asked, as his fingers continued to attack Justin.

“Calling you old,” he hiccuped. “You’re young...hic...and...hic beautiful.”

“That’s more like it,” Brian smiled smugly, as he released Justin from underneath him.

Justin took a swig of his beer, in the hope it would rid him of his hiccups.

“I think you might be better with a glass of water,” Brian told him, as he rubbed his back affectionately. He really needed to stop touching him.

Justin stood and walked to the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge. “You’re...hic...probably...hic...right,” he said, as he took a long, slow sip.

“Feel better?”

Justin nodded. “You’re evil,” he smiled, as he grabbed his t- shirt from the floor and put it on, followed by his hoodie.

“You still okay to order pizza?” Justin asked as his stomach rumbled loudly, “I'm really hungry.”

Brian grinned, “I can tell.”

Justin pulled his laptop out of his messenger bag and brought it over to the couch, sitting down next to Brian. Their bodies seemed to find their own way towards one another and they ended up sitting together with their legs and arms touching.

“What do you want?” Justin asked as he pulled up the pizza place’s website.

“What do you usually get?”

“Stuffed crust Meat Feast.”

Brian made a face. “Can you order me a cheese pizza with mushrooms, olives, onion and bell peppers?”

This time, it was Justin that made a face but added it alongside his to their basket anyway. “Do you like garlic bread?”

Brian nodded. He didn't even want to think about how many calories he’d consume tonight, and worst of all, he couldn’t even run them off.

Brian watched in horror as Justin continued adding things to their basket. Coleslaw, potato wedges, cheese sticks... “What?” he asked bashfully. “I'm hungry.”

Once they completed their order, Justin put his laptop on the coffee table.

“What do you want to watch?” Justin asked, as he automatically scooted closer to Brian.

Mmm! He smells so fucking good.

“Anything but Dance Moms,” he teased.

“Wanna try Jane the Virgin? I really think you’ll like it.”

“Sure,” Brian smiled easily, “I bet I won’t but if you really want to watch it-”

“Don’t judge it until you’ve tried it,” Justin interrupts, “The first season is on Netflix. Let’s start with that.”

“Haven’t you seen the first season though?” Brian asked, confused.

“Yeah, but you haven’t,” Justin pointed out, rolling his eyes, “And I don’t mind watching it again. Trust me, Brian. So much happens. It’s fun.”

And then there they were. Marathoning Jane the Virgin, a show that Brian’s pretty sure was made for a woman but it was pretty fucking funny and has a lot of heart, not that he’ll tell Justin that. Nor will he tell Justin if he’s Team Raphael or Team Michael because he’s not getting pulled in.

“But what if you had to choose?” Justin asked, practically staring into his soul after five episodes.

Brian groaned and threw his hands up in the air.

“Raphael is hotter, I think. I’d fuck him.”

Justin gasped, “But Michael has been there for her! He stayed there even after she got artificially inseminated by mistake, waited two years for her because he respected her decision not to have sex-”

“So I'm guessing you’re a Michael fan?” Brian asked, amused by Justin’s passion.

Justin shook his head, “No. I can’t decide. Raphael really grew on me throughout the show.”

Brian scoffed and shook his head, “You’re so strange.”

Justin smiled a little and rubbed Brian’s shoulder, “Guess it’s for the best you know that about me now.”

Brian’s eyes grew soft as he looked at the hand, “Yeah...but you got my mind off of things today. That...That can be hard to do sometimes.”

Justin pursed his lips and studied Brian, “How are you feeling? You know, about what happened earlier.”

Brian huffed out a humourless laugh, “Well, after four beers and five episodes of angsting over who Virgin Jane will end up with, I'm doing alright.”

“You sure? I know it can’t have been fun seeing your mom like that.”

Brian leaned his head against the back of the couch and sighed. “Let’s just say I’d rather have had a root canal – without an anaesthetic.”

Justin grimaced as he imagined the pain that would cause. “Ow.”

“Yeah, it wasn't exactly the highlight of my day.”

Justin got up from the couch and carried the empty pizza boxes to the kitchen.

“Do you want anything to drink?” he asked.

“Just some water.”

Justin went to the fridge and grabbed two bottles, then pulled out a giant tub of ice cream from the freezer.

“How can you still be hungry?” Brian asked, genuinely amazed at the amount of food that Justin could put away.

“I always have room for dessert,” he shrugged, as he walked back over and dropped the bottle of water in Brian’s lap.

“Thanks,” Brian said, as he watched Justin get comfortable next to him.

Justin shivered. “I'm cold,” he said, as he pulled a blanket off of the back of the couch and covered their legs with it.

“Yet you’re still considering eating ice cream,” Brian laughed.

Justin grinned and handed him a spoon. “Have some.”

Oh, God, he really didn't want to think about how much he’d eaten tonight, he was going to say no to dessert, but after watching Justin lick ice cream off of the back of the spoon, he was convinced otherwise.

“I get it, though – what it’s like to have shitty parents”

Brian looked over at Justin and could see the pain in his eyes as he spoke.

“You handled yourself a hell of a lot better than I would have if I’d seen my da…my father.”

“Homophobic asshole?”

“That’s putting it lightly,” Justin explained bitterly.

“What happened?”

“He kicked me out the moment he found out I was gay.”

“How old were you”? Brian asked as he felt his fists beginning to clench.

Justin took a huge spoonful of ice cream before he answered him. “I’d only just turned seventeen.”

Brian couldn't hide how shocked he was. “Shit, you were still in high school?”

“Yeah.”

Brian sensed there was more to the story than Justin was willing to share tonight. Part of him wanted to press him on it but he knew there were so many fucking things he wasn't ready to tell Justin either. Or anyone, for that matter.

“My mom's great, though,” Justin continued, “I gave her such a rough time when I was 17.”

“Were you a princess?” Brian asked, eyebrow raised.

“Pretty much,” Justin laughed, “What about your dad? Was he any better?”

Brian let out a sigh, “...No. He wasn't religious but he didn't need that to be hateful. He’s dead now, though. Cancer.”

Justin took a breath, “Fuck. I'm sorry.”

“You have nothing to be sorry about,” Brian shrugged, “It’s just the way things were.”

“They shouldn't have been, though,” Justin pointed out, “You’re a good person. They’re ignorant and horrible for not realising what a great son they had.”

Brian looked away for a second and tried to gather himself. The alcohol (that he really wasn't supposed to be drinking yet) and the words that he had never heard come from anyone else’s mouth until now were hitting a little too hard and, with the walls he had carefully built around his heart over the last twenty years, that was not easy to do.

“Hey,” Justin murmured, putting his arm around Brian’s shoulder, “Come here.”

Brian sniffled a little and let himself be brought to Justin’s side. He tried not lean into him too much. He wasn’t going to become some pussy needing to be held just because he had it out with his mother. But Justin seemed to realise he didn’t need that. As Brian turned to Justin to look into his eyes, they found themselves locked in each other’s stares. Fuck, Brian wanted to kiss him. He wanted to do more than that but he was respecting Justin’s need to heal and-

Brian’s thoughts were interrupted by Justin’s lips touching his. Lightly at first but tender and soft. All warm and welcoming. Brian returned the kiss for a few moments, letting Justin cradle his face, before pulling away.

“I thought…” Brian started, confused, “I thought we were doing the friend thing for a while.”

“We are,” Justin answered quietly, “But you really need a friend right now. Someone who can make you feel better.”

“And kissing is going to make me feel better?” Brian asked, amused.

“Yes,” was all Justin answered with, smiling a bit as well, “We shouldn't take it any further. At least not yet. But kissing is underrated and a great healing tool.”

Brian didn't add any more to the conversation. Pulling Justin back in for a kiss, he let himself be comforted by Justin’s lips. Even though Brian loved a good kiss, he usually liked them because they almost always led to bigger and better things. This was different. It was like he couldn't get enough. He could kiss Justin for hours and not get impatient.

The patience was probably a good thing because kissing for hours was just what they ended up doing.