The day after Brian left New York City moved at a very different pace for the separated lovers, Brian and Justin. Brian was running on all cylinders the entire day. He had awakened to the sound of his alarm blaring near his ear and he had to shake off the wild dream he had been having in order to orient himself to where he was and why the damned alarm had been going off. In his dream he had been making passionate love to Justin in the luxurious bed of his hotel suite. He had gotten accustomed to the sound of the hotel phone buzzing with his wake up call. It had been over a month since his own brash alarm had been the source of disturbed sleep. He much preferred waking up next to Justin and the sound of the phone call, but now that he was awake he had to hit the ground running. A quick energy drink to start the day and Brian was on his way.

For the next few hours Brian worked at a fever pitch developing more new ideas he had thrashed out in his brain the night before concerning Talbot's Photo Studios. He had a luncheon date with Mr. and Mrs. Talbot and he needed to impress them. Brian ordered Ted to check out Kinnetik's other clients to see which ones were coming close to the end of their contracts like the three that had threatened to bail on them, but of course Ted had already compiled the list. Luckily there were only a few other companies that fit the category. Brian was determined to get to them before young Hicks of Talbot Advertising could swoop in and charm them. Brian had a full plate for the day with no time to rest. Still he thought often of a certain blond writer back in New York City during the early morning, which surprised him more than he cared to admit. For Brian, work had always come first in his life. He had never let a man he'd slept with encroach on his work thoughts. He thought about calling Justin several times but each time the thought crossed his mind one of his employees would show up in his office door with something important to pass on. Before Brian realized it Ted was warning him that he needed to get to the restaurant where he was to meet the Talbots.

Brian had chosen wisely when making his reservations. Mrs. Talbot liked to think of herself as a gourmet which belied her small town roots where a McDonald's was usually the destination of most families on a night out for dinner. She had come to the big city to make her mark on the world and met Mr. Talbot, a recently widowed older man with a thriving business, while looking for a job as an assistant in his main photo shop. The fifty something Mr. Talbot was immediately attracted to the twenty something Miss Dixon and she was immediately attracted to him...or rather to his social and financial position. They had been married for nearly five years now and Mrs. Talbot had proven to be a shrewd businesswoman. It was she who had chosen Kinnetik, Inc. over their old ad firm a couple of years earlier but their two year contract was about to expire. Brian was determined to secure a new one. He wasn't above using his considerable charm to woo the randy Mrs. Talbot to his way of thinking.

Brian looked his best in his pinstripe suit with the pale blue shirt and his hair smoothed back from his forehead with one loose lock of hair mischievously falling over an arched brow. He had arrived first and received grand treatment since he often brought his favored clients to the upscale French restaurant. When the Talbot's arrived, Brian stood and gave a small bow over the wife's hand as he kissed it, mirroring the continental theme of the restaurant. He turned to the husband and shook his hand briskly. They seated themselves and ordered a grand French meal...all on Brian's tab, of course. Brian was careful to refrain from any business talk until everyone was fully sated. Once the last bite of the elegant mousse they had for dessert was eaten, Brian carefully began to lay out his plans for taking Talbot Photo Studio's into the next decade. He never brought up his rival until Mr. Talbot mentioned them. In the end Brian cracked a joke about one Talbot company leading another Talbot company which could have been risky but instead brought laughter to the table. By the time the meal and conversation was over Brian had a hand shake deal with the husband and wife that assured him of another two year contract. A lingering good bye kiss on the cheek from Mrs. Talbot and Brian collapsed in his chair as the couple left the restaurant.

Brian checked his watch. He still had a couple more hours before his next meeting with Jake's Trucking Company. Thinking of Jake, Jr. and how he had always ended his meetings with them in the past...namely in the bathroom with Jr.'s pants around his ankles and Brian's sheathed cock up the young man's ass...immediately brought images of Justin back into Brian's thoughts. He pulled out his cell and quickly dialed Justin's home number. The phone rang but no one answered. Brian tried the cell number. It rang several times and then went to voice mail.

"Justin, I haven't heard from you so I thought I'd check to see if everything is okay. Call me when you get this message. You know my cell number. Later."

Brian was a little irritated that Justin hadn't called him first since he had told him in the note he'd left behind that he could call anytime, but he was sure the young man would call now when it was obvious, at least to himself, that he was missing Justin's voice. Having taken care of that, Brian quickly paid the bill with his corporate card and headed back to Kinnetik, Inc. He needed to work more on his ideas for the Trucking Company before the two Jakes showed up. Brian wanted to present a kick ass campaign that would be so good Jake Jr. wouldn't balk if Brian didn't indulge in a little trip to the men's room this time...not that Brian felt any compunction about rewarding the good looking kid for a fat contract, but Brian wasn't in the mood for a casual fuck right now. He told himself it was because he was far too busy, refusing to admit that missing Justin had a thing to do with his feelings. He proved how bad he wanted the Trucking Company's business by diving in again with his support staff to fine tune ideas for their meeting. Thoughts of Justin took a back seat again for the time being.

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Justin had gotten a late start on his day, but after talking to Dan and learning no more about Brian's sudden trip out of town or why the man hadn't left him some kind of message, Justin had tried to lose himself in his work. It hadn't lasted long. Within a half hour he gave up. He decided to take a long walk in the cool fresh air outside. Winter was right around the corner but, as often happened, the weather had warmed slightly with the last gasp of Autumn. He pocketed his cell phone and wallet and headed outdoors. Justin still hoped to hear from Brian. Justin decided to take the Subway to a park that wasn't that far from home. It had a little lake and plenty of places to just sit and think. The idea of losing himself in the vast city appealed to Justin. He liked the idea of the anonymity and no one expecting anything from him.

When he came up from the Subway, he made straight for the park. He was soon strolling along the path that skirted the small lake. The air was crisp and clean and it helped Justin to relax a tiny bit. He hadn't realized just how tense he had been until now. There were several groups of people throughout the park, some strolling, some stretched out on the grass, some playing games like tag or touch football. The air was filled with the familiar sounds of people enjoying the life of New York City on a clear day. It made Justin feel even more alone. He tried to shake off the feeling as he continued strolling, sometimes glancing at the ducks that swam at the water's edge which was so close by.

Justin took a seat on a bench for a while and continued to be deep in thought over the last month or so of his life. After a bit, Justin began to imagine how much easier life would be for him if he only had someone he could trust to confide in when he was feeling so down. It hadn't been necessary when there were no ups and downs in his life, but since meeting Brian life had been a roller coaster ride with incredible highs Justin would have loved to share with someone else. Now he knew what the lows felt like and yet he still had no one to unload on. He immediately began to think about his mother. The more he thought about her and the comfort she had always given him when his father had been at his worst growing up, the more he longed to talk to her.

The thought crossed Justin's mind that Brian might have found his reluctance to be open about his sexual orientation to his family an unattractive trait. Justin knew that Brian was openly gay and proud of it in his own hometown. He didn't like talking about his family but Justin was fairly certain that Brian had come out to his family long ago. He had no doubt they hadn't taken the news very well based on Brian's attitude whenever his parents and sister came up in conversation, which wasn't often, but Justin doubted Brian kept his life a secret from them. Brian had too much strength of character for that. He probably thought less of his young lover for being so timid. The more Justin thought about his need to open up to someone and his desire to make Brian proud of him, the more he felt that his mother was the one to go to.

With the decision finally made, Justin rose back up and started to walk again. He would hail a cab and visit his Mom, he decided. He pulled out his cell in order to give her a heads up that he was coming over and that he had something very important to tell her. He was about to punch in her number when the cell began to ring. He didn't even get the chance to see who was calling. Off to the side, distant noises were suddenly much closer and louder. He didn't even have a second to register the 'Look out' that someone had shouted at him before a football smacked Justin right in his side. The ball bounced forward and knocked the cell out of Justin's hand. He had just enough time to see the silver gray instrument splash on the surface of the nearby water, scattering surprised ducks in every direction. Instantly the phone disappeared from view as it sank to the bottom.

Justin was soon surrounded by a group of young men, all apologizing for the accidental over toss of their ball. When Justin assured them that he wasn't injured but indicated that he had lost the grip on his cell, several men volunteered to wade into the water in an attempt to retrieve the missing phone. It took a bit of time but one man finally raised his hand in triumph with the soaked cell clutched tightly in his grasp. Justin quickly checked to see if the phone was damaged and found it totally malfunctioning. One of the young men, a nattily dressed and very cute twenty something, pulled out his wallet and handed over a couple of hundred dollar bills. He apologized again profusely for their mistake and Justin thanked him for his thoughtfulness, telling the young man not to worry about it. The group walked off slapping each other on the back and joking about the arm on their friend who had tossed the ball so hard in the first place.

As the voices of the young men faded away, Justin wondered if the call he had just missed was from Brian. He quickly left the park and looked for a public phone. It wasn't easy to find one in the cell phone world of today, but he finally located a stand. He didn't have Brian's number memorized since it was on speed dial in his now ruined phone, so he decided to call Dan's office to get the number. He had no way of knowing that Dan's office had placed a call no more than five minutes after Brian had left his message on the cell when Justin hadn't picked up on his after lunch call. The phone was still in the water when that call was placed. The minute Dan's secretary answered she informed the young man that she had just tried to call to let Justin know that there had been a cancellation for an interview he had been scheduled for due to illness on the interviewers part. Justin had nothing else scheduled till the following week.

Justin's heart sank. It was obvious the call had been from Dan's office and Brian still hadn't tried to call. Justin squared his shoulders and decided to go through with his newly formed plans. He was hurting too much and he needed to talk it over with his mother. It was now or never, he decided. He hailed a cab and gave his mom's address. By the time Justin arrived at his mothers place, he was shaking inside. If his mom turned her back on him, he wasn't sure he would be able to handle it and he didn't know who he'd turn to next....certainly not Brian since he was beginning to believe the man was through with him.

Jennifer had taken a job after leaving Craig, so she wasn't home when Justin first arrived. She was totally surprised to find her son sitting on her doorstep. Even more surprising was the way he looked. He had seemed so strong and happy just the day before when he had come for Molly's birthday party. Now he looked like someone who had been punched in the stomach. The two greeted each other enthusiastically and Jennifer led her son into the house. Molly was still out with some friends for an after school event and the house was totally quiet. Jennifer offered Justin a drink and he accepted the cold Dr. Pepper that she handed him. Justin took a seat on the couch and waited for his mother to settle into the easy chair. They sat in silence for a few minutes. Jenn watched Justin gulp down several swigs of soda before coming right to the point.

"Son, I know you didn't come all the way over here just to enjoy a cold drink, and I know you well enough to know that something is eating at you. Did you have a fall out with your father after the party, or is there something else you need to tell me? You know there isn't anything you can't say to me, don't you?"

Justin hesitated for only a few seconds and then slowly sat his drink down on the coffee table and straightened up. He looked his mother dead in the eye and started his story. As Justin let the words pour out of him...slowly at first, but soon gaining in confidence...he watched his mother carefully for any signs of revulsion or disgust. Her face showed no hint of anything remotely like that and it gave him the courage to continue on with his story. He told her how he had known for some time that he was gay, but had done nothing about it. He told her that he worked for a gay oriented publishing house and did more than proofreading stories...rather that he wrote many stories himself under pseudonyms. He told her how he wanted to write a full scale main stream novel about gay love but had experienced trouble with it until lately. Finally he reached the point where he admitted that someone had entered his life who gave him the inspiration to really work hard on his novel.

From the moment Justin mentioned the name of Brian Kinney, Jennifer could see the difference it made in her son. His face brightened considerably just revealing the name and the more Justin talked of this Brian the more his face lit up. It warmed her heart to know that Justin had found someone who mattered to him so much, but just as she was feeling relieved that Justin was no longer alone she heard him telling of how Brian had left town without a word just the night before. Justin's face had fallen and she could see how upset he became at what had happened. Without thinking she moved over to the couch and put her arms around her son's shoulders. Justin allowed himself to feel the warmth coming from his mother's love. It comforted him. When he raised his head, Jennifer could see that small tears had formed in the corner of his eyes.

"Justin, I can see how upset you are. Son, do you know for sure that this Brian actually left you because he didn't care about you anymore? Have you heard that from his own mouth?"

It suddenly dawned on Justin that his mother hadn't said a word about his being gay. "Mom, I just told you I'm gay and you didn't bat an eyelash. What gives?"

"Justin, I've suspected it for a long time but it was your right to tell me when you were ready. I'm just glad you finally trusted me enough to say something. Are you planning to tell your father too?"

"I don't know. I don't see why I should bother. He doesn't give a damn about me, straight or gay. What do you think?"

"I think you should do what feels right to you. I'll back you up with whatever you decide. The same goes for your feelings about this man. But Darling, if you really believe in him and what you feel you have with him you should never leave any questions unanswered. You tell me he is from Pittsburgh, so may I suggest that you take a little time off from work and fly over there so that you can ask him face to face why he left you without a word? The worse that can happen is you'll know the truth. Not knowing has got to be more painful."

Justin had never even considered following Brian to his home town. The thought of confronting the man and being rejected was scary as hell. Justin reflected on how he had spent his entire adult life being afraid of the whole world. He had all but locked himself away from life in the vain hope that nothing could ever touch or harm him. But then Brian had come into his life and it was as if he had been asleep all these years. Brian had given him the courage to step out of the little square he had boxed himself into and he never wanted to be that timid little mouse again. Even if Brian told him he wanted nothing more to do with him, Justin wanted to at least have the chance to thank Brian for giving him the courage to start living. He owed Brian that. Jennifer could see the wheels turning in her son's head.

"Justin, if you can't afford the plane tickets I'll be more than happy to pay for them. I can afford it easily. I've had a good year with the realty company. I just want you to be happy, Son. That is all I've ever wanted for you."

Justin got up and hugged his mother tightly again. "No Mom, that won't be necessary. I've been very frugal all this time and I can take care of the expense myself. Actually I can't think of a better way to spend my money. You're absolutely right. I need to know how Brian really feels and I'll never know for certain sitting by the phone. I'm calling my boss right now and tell him that I need some time off. He's a really good man and I think he'll have no problem with it."

Justin walked over to where his mom's phone sat on its stand. As he dialed Dan's number he spoke to his mother.

"I want you to meet Dan, my boss, very soon Mom. He's an amazing man and has been more than good to me for a long time now. I think you'll really like h.... Hello, I'm sorry, Marie. Is Dan still in," he asked Dan's secretary.

Justin said nothing for a few moments and then, "Hey Dan. I'm calling to ask a huge favor. You know I've never asked you for any time off before but something has come up and I really need to leave town for a short while. I have a week before my next interview and I know I haven't finished my latest story but I promise I'll get it done tonight before I leave." Silence for a moment. "Yes it really is that important." Silence again and then, "Thanks Dan. Seriously, I owe you big time for this. I promise to work twice as hard when I get back." Silence. "I know, and I appreciate it. Yes, I'll take care. I'll call as soon as I get back."

With that, Justin hung up. He felt himself coming alive again and smiled for the first time since coming back to Brian's hotel and an empty room. A part of him was scared shitless but another part of him was shaking with anticipation at the prospect of seeing Brian again. Justin stayed for a short while longer and talked...really talked with his mother. They then parted ways and Justin hurried home. He had a story to finish, plans to make, and a morning flight to catch.

To be continued......................