ALEX 

“You know this is kidnapping?” Justin tells me from the back of the van.

“I think Michael and Lindsay got a new member.” Emmett tells him. 

“No, cause Alex managed to actually execute the plan.” Blake tells him.

“Was what we did that bad?” Daphne asks me.

“We left them alone for two whole weeks. That should count for something.” Emmett tells them. 

“Only because you stranded them at sea and they spent a week recovering from dehydration.” I mumble as I drive.

“I was surprised they drank all twelve cases of coconut water.” Blake giggles.

“I swear they should have watched “Castaway” then they would have thought twice about that.” Justin tells him. 

“Well if they had bothered to look in the cabinets instead of fighting about the bananas, they would have found the hot cocoa and water we put there.” Emmett tells him. 

“Which you laced with ex lax.” I tell him. 

“So, did it really smell as bad as the news said?” Daphne snickers.

“You just had to call the press.” I tell her. 

“Hey, they wanted shots of Drew’s yacht. I didn’t tell them Drew was home, just that Emmett and Drew were planning on an ocean orgy.” Daphne tells me. 

“Too bad you got them off the buckets before the news guy got there.” Blake glares like it's my fault.

“So where you taking us?” Emmett asks me. 

“You'll find out after I stash you guys away.” I tell him. 

“Did you really have to handcuff us?” Blake asks me. 

“I'm just surprised he managed it.” Justin tells him looking at his hand.

“I just jumped in because I saw Baby in the van.” Emmett tells us. 

“So want to tell us why we’re being kidnapped?” Daphne asks me.

“I've tried reasoning with all of you, but that would take you being able to listen for more than ten seconds. In the last week I've had to call 911 to get Michael and Lindsay out of each prank you pulled, I decided to get even.” I tell them.

“It's not our fault they fell in the gorilla cage. They thought they saw Justin in there. Although the guy did look like him from behind. My question is, why they thought Justin was in the exhibit?” Daphne asks me.

“Could have been that you let them follow Justin to the zoo. Then according to them, they saw him enter the room next to the cage.” I tell her. 

“I was just talking to the guy Brian helped get a degree. I can't help we look alike.” Justin says innocently, like I don't know better.

“He just happened to be wearing the outfit you were?” I ask him. 

“It was cargos and a T shirt.” Emmett tells me. 

“They weren’t hurt, just got some gorilla shit in the face. See even the gorillas can spot crazy.” Daphne tells us. 

“Then the next day I'm having to get FedEx to stop them from being shipped to China.” I tell them. 

“We didn’t put them in the crate.” Emmett tells me smiling.

“I never said I was going to China, just that I thought about it.” Justin tells me. 

“Why they believed they would get there in a crate definitely makes us all wonder.” Blake tells me. 

“Because apparently someone told everyone at Woody’s that at least FedEx would deliver right to the door.” I tell him. 

“All I said was that if I wanted to surprise someone I'd have FedEx deliver me, because they don't lose packages.” Emmett tells us. 

“They’re the ones who took it from there.” Justin tells me. 

“The next day was on all of you.” I tell them.

“Come on, that was funny.” Emmett snickers. 

“She said she wanted to be my muse.” Justin tells me. 

“Michael begged everyone to let him show Justin he could be his muse.” Daphne tells me. 

“We didn’t use Brian’s glue, that should count.” Blake tells me. 

“You plastered them to a billboard in the middle of Pittsburgh.” I grumble. 

“It wasn’t that bad, they got down.” Emmett tells me. 

“After spending the night covered in bird seed and honey and you let a hundred pigeons loose.” I glare at them.   

“I’m going to defend that one, they let me do it.” Justin tells me.

“You offered to let them spend time with you, of course the idi…” I stop before I say what was about to come out of my mouth.

“I made sure to cover their heads and hands.” Blake tells me.

“With monkey masks and you glued the hair on their hands.” I tell Mr Helpful.

“So, is this like a camping trip?” Daphne asks as we enter the woods.

“No, this is me keeping you guys out of my patients therapy after yesterday.” I tell them.

“Come on, you have to gives us points for that one. Daphne worked hard on the hamster ball.” Emmett tells me looking around the area.

“They ran for miles, we helped keep them fit.” Blake tells me.

“I think the kids will love that one at Gus’s birthday party.” Daphne tells him.

“If we didn’t have to use a blowtorch to get the thing open it would have been great.” I tell them sarcastically.

“Like it’s our fault they ended up in the Pride Parade.” Justin snickers.

“We made sure they were dressed.” Emmett tells me.

“Michael actually has a decent ass in hot pants, and the bra carried the man boobs well.” Daphne tells me wrinkling her nose in disgust. 

“I could have gone without seeing Lindsay in granny panties, but well, we worked with what we had.” Blake tells me.

“Don’t worry your heads about anything because by the time you get back to Pittsburgh, I will hopefully have them believing you are the worst thing they could ever want.” I tell Justin as I park in front of the cabin.

“Now that’s just mean. I might need to warn you that Brian is going to be pissed when he finds out we aren’t going to have sex tonight.” Justin tells me.

“He doesn’t know you’re gone, and that I took you, so I’m not really that worried.” I tell him.

“Did I mention that I texted him on the way?” Justin smirks at me.

“I took your phone and you’ve been handcuffed.” I smirk back.

“Like I couldn’t get out of these, I just left them on so you would keep driving. It was a lovely drive.” He tells me and opens the van door, leaving the handcuffs behind.

“Did we forget to mention that Justin and I practiced getting out of handcuffs one night.” Emmett tells me and follows Justin out throwing his cuffs in my lap.

“Doc, you really need to work on your plans better.” Blake and Daphne get out and walk to Justin and Emmett.

“My plan was to strand you here and get you next week. So have fun.” I tell them and turn to drive off. I laugh because I have all their phones in the box next to me. 

I look back to see them laughing about something and my smiles starts to fade. Why do I feel like I’ve just been played by them. Justin’s phone rings and I dread answering this.

“So you took Justin and the gang to Vermont?” Brian growls.

“I don’t know what your talking about.” I feign innocence.

“You do understand that you declared war with them, don’t you?” Brian asks me.

“Not you?” I ask hoping he doesn’t kill me.

“I would, but a weekend in Vermont sounds good.” Brian tells me.

“You expected me to answer Justin’s phone didn’t you?” I ask him.

“Since he stole yours, then yes.” He tells me. 

I pull over and put down Justin’s phone and search my pockets for mine. That little shit stole my phone. 

“Brian, Justin needs to give me my phone back. My patients call that number.” I tell him.

“Then they are going to learn what real therapy is.” Brian laughs and hangs up.

EMMETT

“It’s kind of peaceful here. We need to do something about that.” Daphne tells Justin.

“Brian said he was on his way.” Justin looks at Alex’s phone.

“Tell him to bring a straight friend.” Daphne tells Justin.

“Is this Alex’s cabin or is he renting it?” Blake asks us.

“Hold on I’ll find out.” Justin dials and puts it on speaker phone.

“Justin, I need you to let me have my phone.” Alex tells him.

“We wanted to know if you own this cabin or are you renting it?” Justin asks him.

“Look, I own it and I think you could just relax for the weekend. I just need my phone.” He tells Justin.

“You should have thought of that before you kidnapped me.” Justin tells him.

“Brian said he wanted to spend the weekend, so in a way I did you a favor.” He tells him.

“Well don’t worry because we decided to do you one too.” I tell him.

“You’ll stay and let me work with Michael and Lindsay.” He tells me.

“Now Doc, where would be the fun in that?” Daphne tells him.

“Then what?” He asks us.

“I’d drive back to Pittsburgh before Lindsay and Michael escape.” She tells him.

“How could they escape jail?” He asks us.

“Because Brian is bailing them out and told them you kidnapped Justin.” Emmett tells him.

“Why would Brian do that?” I ask them.

“We were out of ideas until we let you kidnap us. I figured by the time we get back in town we would have a new idea.” Justin tells me.

“I hope you have good insurance, because they tend to think of stupid ways to do things. I mean they think you took me from them. I doubt they are going to just toilet paper your yard.” Justin tells me and hangs up.

All I wanted was a weekend free of them.