Perfection

Chapter 11

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Justin stood in the driveway, his mind reeling at Brian's words.

"Cancer, testicular cancer."

That was why Brian was so reluctant, hell so fucking scared, to get close to him. He had been a flaming idiot thinking that Brian wasn't interested. It was much more than that. He quickly made his way up to his apartment and switched on his computer. It took him several hours to read through some of the information about testicular cancer, its treatment and the side effects that resulted.

Finally Justin rubbed his eyes. He had been staring at the computer screen far too long. He got up and went to the fridge to get a beer. He carried it to the couch and sat down.

Brian Kinney had or had had testicular cancer, if Brian's words meant anything. But when? How long ago had this been? Was he in remission? Had he had radiation or chemotherapy? There were so many questions and Justin didn't know how to get the answers. Unless he asked Brian, but Brian seemed to hate even mentioning it. It was very unlikely that they could actually discuss the cancer.

Justin leaned his head back on the couch. His mind was racing with possible scenarios and horrible possibilities. He knew he cared about Brian Kinney, cared a lot. But what was he going to do now? Maybe he should just walk away and let Brian heal himself. Brian Kinney was a strong man, but … also a damaged man, if what Justin had witnessed meant what he thought it did. The cancer had done more than eat away at Brian's body; it had eaten away at his psyche too.

As far as walking away from Brian was concerned, he knew he didn't want to do that. Brian had become too important to him. He enjoyed being with the man, even with all his foibles and problems. Brian was worth whatever it would take to get to know him.

And that was when Justin decided that he would do the photo shoot to the best of his ability. He would do it for Brian. He wanted them all to see that he still had some of his old charisma, and he wanted Brian to know that he could have all of Justin Taylor if he merely asked for it. And he hoped that Brian would think he was worth asking for.

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Brian paced back and forth at the photographer's studio. The two blonds that he and Sharpdick had selected were already there and getting their hair and makeup looked after. They were waiting for Justin Taylor. He wasn't exactly late … yet, but it was getting close.

Rubbing his fingers on his temples, Brian realized that Justin might decide not to come. That made his impending headache loom even larger. How many times had Brian run out on Justin? His not showing up today would be perfect payback. Brian groaned involuntarily.

"Brian?"

"Yeah, Schmidt, what is it?"

"I brought the contract. Where's Justin?" Ted asked looking around.

"He isn't here yet."

"That's cutting it kind of fine, isn't it?"

"Very fine," Brian replied feeling his anger grow. He hated to be made to look like a fool. And if Justin Taylor didn't show, that's exactly what he would look like.

"Hey," Justin's sweet voice said from behind them. "Sorry I'm a little late. I had a really bad headache when I woke up this morning. I kept hoping it would go away, but I finally had to take some medication. I may not be at my best."

"That's too bad, Justin," Ted said.

"How is it now?" Brian asked looking at Justin closely. The blond looked a little drawn and tense.

"Better, but it's still there."

"Do you think it's related to the shoot?" Brian asked. Justin nodded. "Ted, go tell them all that Justin's here and he'll be in the makeup room in a few minutes."

"Sure, Boss," Ted said hustling away.

"Come over here," Brian said. Justin followed him over to a nearby chair. "Sit down."

"But I need to get ready," Justin protested.

"Sit."

"Yes, master," Justin replied trying to make a joke. He planted his butt in the chair.

Brian placed his fingers on Justin's temples and started rubbing slow circles over the sensitive area. After a minute or so he heard Justin sigh.

"Does that feel good?"

"Heaven." Brian laughed. "Where did you learn to do that?" Justin asked.

"It's one of the few useful things that came out of my relationship with the guy you met at Babylon."

"The one you wouldn't introduce me too?"

"Yeah," Brian replied making a face that he knew Justin couldn't see, since he was standing behind the chair. "Garnet used to get bad tension headaches. This helped."

"I can see why," Justin whispered feeling all the tension leave his body. "What happened with that guy?"

"I … it's not something we can talk about here," Brian said hesitantly.

"Later?"

"Maybe … later."

"Good. I feel better. I should get to makeup."

"Go ahead," Brian said removing his fingers from Justin's temples. "You look better."

"As opposed to old," Justin tried to laugh, but three sneezes caught him first.

"Gesundheit," Brian chuckled when Justin stopped sneezing. "Get going."

"Thanks, Brian. That massage helped a lot."

Brian shrugged thinking that he would like to massage some other parts of Justin Taylor's body. Justin walked away to get fixed up for the shoot. Brian headed over to the photographer.

"Isn't that Justin Taylor, the Calvin Klein model?" Angelo, the photographer, asked.

"One and the same."

"I thought he was retired."

"He was. But he's agreed to this shoot."

"I can't believe the Calvin Klein people thought he was too old. He looks great."

"Be sure to tell him that," Brian said with a tiny smile.

"I will."

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The shoot went very well. Justin took to the other two models who had already been hired, and they were very solicitous knowing that Justin had already hit the big time, which is where they hoped this gig was going to take them. By the time the shoot was over, there was no doubt that Justin was the best blond for the job.

Mr. Sharpe walked over to Justin. "I'm prepared to offer you a contract right now, Mr. Taylor. I want you as one of the High Life models."

Justin smiled that radiant smile. "You don't think I'm too old?" he had to ask. That initiated a set of three sneezes.

"I hope you're not coming down with something," Mr. Sharpe said as Justin recovered. "You have just the right look for what we want. Perfect, in fact."

"Thank you for saying so."

"Would you be willing to sign a contract today?"

"Um … there are some stipulations."

"I know. I believe Mr. Kinney already had those written into the contract."

"He did?" Mr. Sharpe nodded. "But why? You couldn't have known that you would pick me."

"I wanted you for High Life the minute I saw your photo. We just needed to see how your chemistry was with the other two models."

"And how was it?"

"Perfect! You're the one we want."

Justin's smile out-blazed the photographer's lights. "If you're sure. I guess I could sign today."

"I'll send Mr. Schmidt over with the contract," Dick said as he shook Justin's hand. He walked over to Brian with a satisfied look on his face.

"Hey," Ted said as he approached Justin. "Brian wanted me to go over the special stipulations with you. He wants to make sure they suit you before you sign."

"That's very nice of him," Justin replied.

"Brian's … okay."

Ted walked them over to the photographer's desk where they could sit down and go over the contract.

"Ted, could I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Brian, he's … um … he's had cancer, hasn't he?"

"How … how did you know that?"

"He kind of told me."

"He never discusses that with anyone."

"He doesn't?" Ted shook his head. "Is he okay? Did they get it all?"

"Yeah, as far as I know. But the cancer and the radiation took its toll. He was pretty sick for a while."

"How long ago was that?"

"Just a few months."

"Is that why…? Um, do you know if…? Um… shit, I don't know how to say this."

"I think he's fine, healthwise," Ted said. "It's something else that is troubling him."

"What?"

"I don't think I can talk to you about this."

"But…"

"Justin, he's my boss, and also my friend, but there are limits. He's a very private person. He'd kill me if he knew I'd discussed even this much with you."

"I like him a lot, Ted. But he won't tell me anything."

"He was hurt."

"I figured that much."

"Keep working on him if you think he's worth it."

"I'll try," Justin sighed. It sounded like a daunting task.

"Then let's go over this contract and get you all taken care of."

Brian watched Justin and Ted huddled over the contract. Dick Sharpe had just left, more than happy with the outcome of the photo shoot. At least that was one good thing that had come out of today's meeting.

"He looked great," Angelo said to Brian.

"Yeah, Mr. Sharpe thought so too. We're signing him right now."

"Good move."

Brian smiled. Maybe he'd ask Justin out to dinner to celebrate their mutually beneficial collaboration. He walked over to Ted and Justin.

"How's it goin'?" he asked with a smirk that only Ted understood.

"Signed, sealed and delivered," Ted said with a smile.

"I hope I covered everything that you wanted me to include in your contract," Brian said to Justin.

"More than everything. I couldn't ask for more," Justin smiled.

"Well, I'll take this back to the office," Ted said watching the eye exchange between the two men. "I'll see you tomorrow, Boss. Justin." Ted walked away. Neither man paid any attention to Ted as he left.

"How about an early dinner?" Brian asked.

"I have to get this makeup off my face."

"I don't see why you needed it in the first place," Brian said with a grin.

"Thanks, but let me get cleaned up and I'd love something to eat."

Brian watched Justin walk over to the makeup area. He didn't know what had possessed him to ask Justin out for dinner. He just felt like it. And he still owed the man some unspecified number of dates to make up for him coming to the photo shoot. Besides, he just plain liked being with Justin Taylor.