MICHAEL 

I swear it's like everyone’s turned on me. I couldn’t get into Babylon because the doorman is a jackass. Even Lindsay acting like a bitch didn’t help, and people usually do what she wants. We decided to wait at the diner and watch for Brian to pass by. I figured he would have to talk to us if we showed up when he came. I almost groaned when Ma was there working, she's not happy with me right now. Lindsay and I sat down and I waited for Ma to tear into us.

“So are you two hungry or just upset you couldn’t get to Brian tonight?” She asks us.

“We just wanted to eat, nothing else.” Lindsay tells her.

“Really. The way you two have been running off your partners, I thought maybe you two were going to try to make a go of it together.” She tells us.

“They left us because they’re selfish pieces of shit.” I tell her.

“They left because the two people who married them are chasing someone who’s already been caught. I hope you two like living in your fantasy worlds alone, because that’s where you're headed.” She tells us.

“I want to know why I can’t get in Babylon.” I mumble.

“Oh do you? Probably because I called Mark and warned him if you two showed up there it was to cause trouble, and Mark didn’t need the aggravation.” Ma tells us smiling.

“Like he would listen to you.” I tell her.

“He knows that Brian and Justin don’t need Brian’s supposed friends causing his boss to have a shitty night, and of course it helps that he’s trying get in the academy and Carl told Mark he’d help him.” Ma tells us.

“I’m your son and you did that to me?” I ask her.

“Being my son doesn’t get you off the hook when you're acting like nothing matters to you but Brian. HE DOESN’T WANT YOU. Get that through both your heads. I’ve tried to stay out of this, but the kids are hurt and neither of you want to deal with Jen because she’s not very reasonable when it comes to Brian and Justin. So do yourselves a favor and stop acting like you're saving someone. Someone who doesn’t need to be saved.” She tells us.

“They are trying to take Gus from me, I can’t let them do it.” Lindsay tells Ma, with tears that I wish I could fake the way she does.

“They are trying to make it so Gus can be a kid and not the adult in your household. Lindsay, trust me, I believe being a mother is important, but not if it’s done the way you seem to do it.” Ma tells her.

“What about the fact that they have Jenny, she’s my daughter.” I tell her.

“Really, are you sure she’s yours? I’m only asking because up until today you never seemed to care what happens to her. You two are really a piece of work, trying to use those kids to excuse your idiotic behavior. Now either order or go stand in front of Babylon looking like two losers who couldn’t get in.” She tells us.

“I think maybe the two of them need to sit here while I pay for them to eat.” A blond woman says from behind Lindsay.

“Jen, don’t pay their way, it’s what causes their problems.” Ma smirks.

“I think that you and I need to explain exactly what Lindsay and Michael are going to do.” She tells us.

“You don’t have any say in our lives.” I tell her.

“If you want to keep your comic shop and Lindsay wants a place to live, I do.” She tells us.

“What do you mean a place to live?” Lindsay asks her.

“I mean, I'll buy your house, kick your ass out on the street and smile as the locks are changed.” She tells Lindsay.

“I have people who will help me.” Lindsay tells her.

“Your parents, I doubt they want to piss my family off. I mean they are the kind of people who will kiss my ass just to say they did. I think your wife would be cheering that she was away from a self-serving bitch like you. Of course I could be wrong, but then you could test me and see.” Jen smiles at Lindsay.

“I really need to learn how to talk the way you do, you make it sound like a pleasant conversation.” Ma tells Jen.

“Deb, I love the way you cut through the bullshit, don’t change for me.” She smiles at Ma.

“You two are friends?” I ask them.

“We’ve been friends since Deb met Justin and the kids. Now on to you.” She tells me.

“You don’t scare me.” I tell her, looking at Lindsay’s wary look.

“Then I hope you can afford the increase in your rent on the shop.” She tells me.

“What?” I ask her.

“I bought the building from your landlord. I figured that if Justin is insisting on staying here, that I would start looking at real estate here. Did you know that your landlord was selling the whole block your store is in? No, well he and I came to an agreement this morning and I own your building now. So, I can be a nice landlord and keep your rent affordable, or I can raise it high enough that you either find a new location, or sell out of your car. Of course you could go back to being an assistant manager of the Big Q, but then you burned that bridge too, didn’t you?” She tells me.

“Ma, you wouldn’t let her do this would you?” I ask her.

“Michael, you are an adult aren’t you?” Jen asks me.

“I’m not a kid.” I tell her.

“Then why are you asking your mommy to take care of you?” She asks me.

“Because he thinks that everyone owes him.” Ma tells her.

“So, Deb and I have talked and decided that if you two don’t act like adults, we are going to act like the parents who put you in time out.” She tells us.

“What do you want from us?” Lindsay asks her.

“I want you to let Gus stay with his fathers, and figure out how to be a better mother to him. You OWE Gus that. My offer is that I will set you up in a reasonable apartment and pay the rent for a year. In that time, you leave my sons alone and get your life in order. It’s that simple for you.” She tells Lindsay.

“What about me?” I ask her.

“I don’t take your store because that’s all I can do for you.” She tells me.

“You can’t pay for my house and things like you’ll do for Lindsay?” I ask her, because why does Lindsay get more shit?

“I told Jen no to doing anything for either of you, but she’s more generous than I am.” Ma tells us.

“No deal, you aren’t taking Gus from me.” Lindsay tells her, and leaves pissed.

“Well Michael, are you going to turn me down too?” Jen asks me.

“I think you're afraid that Lindsay and I are right. So you're trying to stop us from proving it, so yes, I’m going to turn you down.” I tell her.

“Deb, are you sure he’s yours?” Jen asks Ma.

“I always thought so, but then I could be wrong.” She tells Jen, shaking her head.

I leave while they are talking and run after Lindsay. What if she’s not just fucking with us? 

Lindsay was heading towards Babylon, and I think Brian should hear what Justin’s mother just did. I guess they think they can keep Brian with all that money and status. Lindsay stopped and stared at Brian and Justin, they were all over each other in front of Babylon.

“BRIAN, ENOUGH OF THE GAMES.” Lindsay yells at him.

BRIAN

Really, I’m at second base and they come along. I rest my head on Justin’s as he zips me and I kiss him for making sure I got done before I look at Lindsay.

“Go in and make sure Mel stays in there, she doesn’t need this right now.” I whisper to him.

“Neither do you.” He tells me.

“I have you to be there for me, look at what she had.” I tell him. 

“I'm not going to feel sorry for her because she married the wickedest witch.” He tells me. 

“No one said you had to, but I can handle this, she can't right now.” I tell him. 

“BRIAN STOP IGNORING ME.” Lindsay screams at me.

“You're trying to make me give her a chance aren’t you?” He asks me. 

“I want us to help Gus trust in adults.” I tell him. 

“He trust us.” He tells me. 

“ARE YOU FINISHED FUCKING HIM? BECAUSE I'M NOT GOING ANYWHERE UNTIL YOU LISTEN TO ME.” Lindsay continues.

“But he doesn't trust anybody with Jenny. We need to help Jenny, to help Gus.” I tell him. 

“Fine, I'll play nice.” He tells me. 

“BRIAN, HIS MOTHER THREATENED US.” Michael yells, glaring at Justin.

“Guess Mom got tired of the shit, hopefully she won't get Ryder to blow up their houses.” Justin giggles.

“What am I blowing? Cause Ben’s being a prude.” Ryder tells us leaning on the building.

“I'm just uncomfortable with the backroom.” Ben tells us, giggling.

“He drunk?” Justin whispers to Ryder.

“Yeah, he said something about me changing his world to color, then proceeded to try to drink half the bar. I think it's kind of cute.” Ryder tells us giving Ben a peck on the cheek.

“What the hell, we haven't been apart a couple of days and you’re fucking around already.” Michael screeches.

“If only.” Ryder whispers.

“Sure, why not, you've been fucking around at our marriage the whole time. Hey, how did you say that Brian? The less than stellar fucking I was getting was worth the fucking over Michael is providing. Well something like that, so maybe I’ll finally get fucked by someone who actually pictures ME in the bed.” Ben tells him. 

“Dude trust me, you are all I would picture.” Ryder tells him.

“Brian, could we please talk about the fact that his mother just threatened me?” Lindsay asks us.

“Sure, but I couldn’t stop Mom if I wanted to, you pissed her off.” I tell Lindsay.

“So you're going to let her hurt our son’s mother?” Lindsay asks me.

“What the hell are you after Lindsay? Because I honestly don’t get you.” Justin asks her. Shit, he’s pissed.

“It’s none of your business, so why don’t you stay the hell out of it. You’re the reason Brian is acting like we aren’t important to him. Too bad he can’t see that you're just a useless piece of ass with a bank account.” Michael tells Justin.

“Emmett, you know the whole bail thing?” Drew asks Emmett.

“Yes Sugar?” Emmett asks him.

“Make sure Aunt Jen has it, because I’m going to need it.” Drew tells him, and starts towards Michael.

“Don’t worry Sweetie, I got you covered.” Emmett tells him.

“Hey Michael.” Ryder tells him as Ben starts feeling him up.

“What?” Michael scowls.

“Running would be good right now.” Ryder tells him as he moans. 

“Why would I run? He can’t touch me.” Michael yells, as Drew comes closer.

“Because Drew really likes to throw shit.” Ryder tells him.

Michael stops what he was about to say and takes off down the road. Drew keeps going and Emmett runs behind him laughing at Michael screaming that his Ma will hear about this. All that’s left are two pissed off WASPS.

“So Lindsay, what the hell do you want?” Justin asks her again.

“I want what I would have had if I’d married better.” She tells us looking at Mel.

“That doesn’t explain anything to me, WHAT DO YOU WANT TO GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY LIFE?” Justin tells her.

“For you to disappear.” She tells him.

“Not going to happen. I hope you like what Daphne has waiting for you.” He tells her.

“What’s that?” She asks him.

“Your whole life in vivid color for a judge to see. I think your parents might be a little embarrassed by all the fucked up shit you did. I mean really, trying to steal from your kid, that’s a new low, even for you.” He tells her.

“Justin, what are you talking about?” Mel asks him.

“Lindsay knows and that’s all that matters. I think I’ll let Daphne do the honors. A lot of reporters would love to report on a Lloyd going to court for custody of a kid. Remember that Lindsay, before we take this game further, I can afford the hit, can you?” Justin tells her.

“I think you haven’t remembered that not everyone in your family thinks you're so wonderful.” Lindsay tells us.

“No he doesn’t, but hey, I’m even ready for that.” Justin tells her and walks away.

“We are done Lindsay, don’t expect me to listen to you anymore.” I tell her, and follow Justin to the car.

I chase Justin because I’ve never seen him like this before. Who the hell has Lindsay contacted, I thought she was too busy chasing me. I get in the car and find Justin with his head in his hands.

“Do you want to explain what that was?” I ask him, thinking he’s acting strange.

“She’s thinks he’s going to really be any help.” He tells me, looking out the windshield.

“Who, and what is this about stealing from Gus?” I ask him.

“Sperm donor, and it’s Jenny, not Gus.” He tells me.

“Tell Daphne, as dirty as she needs to.” I tell him, kissing him.