BRIAN

Justin took off with Gus to go eat artery cloggers and then meet up to tell Mel all about waterbirth. Needless to say, I stayed home. I figured it was a good time for Ted and I to talk about the changes in my plans for New York. Ted came up and we started working on the list I need him and Cynthia to complete in the next few months. Then Ted suggested I consider Kenny for a position in New York. 

“Why would I move on of my best execs with me?” I ask him.

“His wife wants to move closer to their families. I also think he’s done all he can here and needs a chance to win accounts in bigger markets.” He tells me.

“I wouldn’t mind, because he thinks like I do, but without him, you and Cynthia are going to have to push the other execs to start earning their paychecks. Small accounts are fine if they want Pittsburgh to become a branch and not grow with Kinnetik.” I tell Ted.

“Cynthia already has a meeting set up to congratulate Kenny on doing what it took to be considered for the new headquarters.” Ted tells me.

“What makes you think it’s the new headquarters, I could just like the space.” I tell him smirking.

“It could be the offices you set up for both Cynthia and I. Want to explain that?” Ted asks me.

“I can’t have you two just using available space, and you should expect that, since you’re CFO.” I tell him.

“I just figured that when Blake and I want to come see an Opera, I’ll pretend it’s business.” He tells me smirking.

My buzzer rang and a voice I didn’t want to hear came over the speaker.

“Brian, can you let me in?” Michael yells.

“Are we done?” I ask Ted.

“I have the second pile of paperwork, so sure.” He tells me, putting it away.

I buzz Michael in, even though I’d rather not have another heart to heart about how nobody thinks about Mikey.

“Hey, Ma is going to keep Jenny tonight for me. I was hoping that everyone would want to go out tonight.” He tells us.

“Michael, regardless of Justin trying to talk sense in you, he really doesn’t mean he’s forgiven you.” I tell him.

“I just want us to all go out one night without all the bullshit.” He tells us.

“Brian, I found a buyer for the loft.” Jen comes in, not seeing Michael.

“Why are you selling the loft?” Michael asks, looking horrified.

“Is this a bad time?” Jen asks, not looking at Michael.

“You can’t sell the loft, it’s… it’s…” Michael seems to be at a loss for words.

“I no longer need it with my new house and Justin’s house here.” I tell him.

“Then sell Justin’s house and keep this.” Michael tells me, like it’s his decision.

“Brian, the buyer wants to see the loft Monday. I just wanted you to know.” Jen tells him, turning to leave because I don’t think Jen is ready to deal with Michael.

“I can’t believe you're helping Brian move Justin away from you.” Michael tells her.

“Brian, call me when you have time.” Jen tells me, without saying anything to Michael.

“I guess Justin never being home is normal to you.” Michael spits out.

Ted grabbed me but seemed to forget Jen in all of this. I wanted to toss Michael to the lioness. Jen’s held back on Michael so far, but you know you just don’t keep poking an angry animal and not expect to get mauled.

“Michael, do not think you have the right to tell me ANYTHING about my son.” Jen speaking slowly should have alerted Michael to shut his mouth.

“I just think someone should point out that selling the loft, which is part of Brian, doesn’t make any sense.” He tells us. 

“It just four walls and a roof, not part of Brian.” She tells him. 

“It’s the place Brian bought to show that he made it in the world. Everything in this loft represents a part of Brian. He can’t sell who he is, to become something he never wanted.” Michael tells us hysterically.

“I can and I am selling it, because it doesn’t define me.” I tell him.

“I’m not going to stand by while you leave everything you love behind. You're acting like you and Justin are married, when you're not.” He tells me.

“They are married in the way they want to be.” Ted tells him.

“Why would it matter to you Michael?” Jen asks him.

“lt’s a mistake. One that he’ll regret, like following Justin was a mistake.” Michael should have seen it coming, since Deb does it so often

“I think Brian’s mistake was staying friends with you when you never understood that it didn’t give you ownership over everything he does. You call yourself friends with Brian, but then say things that I still have nightmares about. And you’re still run around calling all of them your friends while acting like everything they do has something to do with you. Instead of being ashamed of yourself, you act like everyone should overlook anything you do and pat you on the head saying, “It’s just Michael being Michael.’ Michael take a look at your life, you barely managed to keep Hunter from writing you off, and Ben, if he’s smart should leave you lying on the ground.” She tells him with tears in her eyes.

“Jen, calm down.” I tell her quietly, as I turn her away from Michael.

“I can’t. I feel like everyone is just ignoring the fact that Michael really doesn’t see what he said as wrong.” She tells me.

“Jen, no one is ignoring it, we are ignoring Michael.” I tell her.

“Jen, I know I shouldn’t have said anything, but you need to help Brian see that getting rid of the loft isn’t what he should do. If anything, that house that he bought should go. All it represents is empty promises Brian and Justin made to each other.” Michael tells her.

“So because I was able to let Justin go, with the promises we made to each other, instead of standing around saying words that have less meaning than your marriage in Canada, I didn’t make a promise to Justin. We didn’t need a fake marriage to know we would stay together. How together do we fucking need to be for it to get through to you that I never made a promise to him that I didn’t keep.” I tell him, angry that somehow all he sees me not keeping my word to Justin.

“My marriage was at least a show that Ben and I didn’t need other people in our lives. It gives meaning when you say the words that tie you together.” He tells me, like he and Ben aren’t split up.

“We didn’t need to say them for Justin and me to change the things we were ready to change when we were ready for them. Monogamy is dependent on how you view it, just because Justin and I were both still playing around, to us monogamy meant that no one comes between us emotionally. We might have decided to stop being with other people but only because we were ready for it, not so that YOU could fucking approve of us.” I tell him.

“Michael, go home and tell your husband your opinions, because my sons don’t need them. Do not even think you have any right to talk to me. I view you as barely a step up from Christopher Hobbs since you said what you did about Justin.” She tells him and leaves.

“Go home Michael, think of it as if David told you.” I tell him.

Michael walked out the door and took the stairs after he heard Jen shut the downstairs door. Ted sat back down and started questioning me about colors for the walls that were available for Kinnetik NY. You know, Ted seems to know business is the only thing I care about.

MICHAEL

I went to Ma’s to pick up Jenny and tell her that I’d keep her tonight. I called Emmett to see if he wanted to hang out and he told me that he was busy tonight too. I just wanted one night where no one was pissed at me. I walk in and Ma must have invited someone over, because I see a guy sitting at the table talking to her. I walk into the kitchen and it’s Alex Wilder, I didn’t even know Ma knew him.

“Hey Michael why not sit down and I’ll get you some lunch.” Ma tells me.

“Where’s Jenny?” I ask her.

 “She taking a nap. She was tired from playing outside with Carl. You know Alex don’t you?” She asks as she pushes me in a seat.

“How are you doing Michael?” Alex asks me.

“I’m having some problems, but then who doesn’t?” I tell him.

“Your mom said you and Ben broke up.” He tell me.

“He says I don’t talk about anything, which is the opposite of what everyone else thinks.” I tell him.

“What did he want you to talk about?” He asks me. 

“Blake told me it’s irrational fear, but it’s just me, I worry.” I tell him.

“Maybe you can share it with me and we could see why Blake thinks that?” He asks me.

“Ben and Hunter are not going to outlive me, and I wanted my friends to be there so I wouldn’t be alone.” I tell him.

“Michael, HIV isn’t the death sentence it was years ago. Plenty of people live with it and lead long lives. You have just as good a chance at dying before them. More people die in accidents than from HIV everyday. They could be alone just as easily.” He tells me.

“I guess, but I wanted my friends to stay here and they all want to change everything about their lives. I did it once and I know it’s not the answer to anything.” I tell him.

“How does what you did have anything to do with how it works for others?” He asked me.

“My friends need me to see what they won’t. Mel convinced Justin to have a baby with her. Justin really loves kids, and I think if he and Brian had found another way he wouldn’t end up regretting what Mel and Lindsay will do.” I tell him.

“Which is?” He asks me.

“They will tell you what you want to hear, but then tell you how it’s going to be.” I tell him.

“So they’ve kept you out of your daughter’s life?” He asks me.

“No, but they made it seem like she would have all of us, and then Mel tells me that I can see Jenny when she’s five. I won’t have Jenny growing up without a father.” I tell him.

“She isn’t, is she?” He asks me.

“No, but they made me fight to even have a say in her life.” I tell him.

“Michael…” Ma stops when Alex shakes his head.

“Wait, why are you here?” I ask him.

“Your family is worried about how you're isolating yourself. I was asked to see if maybe you and I could talk and help you see that what you're doing.” He tells me.

“I don’t need a shrink.” I glare at Ma.

“I think you need someone to listen that can be impartial. I don’t have anything invested in your friends, so I can listen and maybe together we can see where your thought process needs an outsider’s viewpoint. Either way I’m offering you an ear to talk to.” He tells me, handing me his card.

Ma stands in the kitchen waiting for Alex to leave. “Michael he really helped me see that I was hurting my relationship with Carl.” She tell me.

“You're seeing Alex?” I ask her.

“I needed help to stop treating everyone like they owed me an explanation. Alex gave me the chance to tell him why I felt what I felt but then helped me see that all I was doing was pushing them away. I want you to get help too, because every day you lose more friends.” She tells me.

“Daddy.” Jenny comes in, rubbing her eyes.

“Do it so Jenny isn’t the only one you have left.” Ma tells me.

“I’ll think about it.” I tell her and pick Jenny up to go.