MICHAEL

In the month since Ma got married I can’t say a lot changed for me, but I no longer denied what Alex was making me face. I think that it’s too late for Ben and me, because Hunter told me that Ben was seeing someone else and that I needed to let him be happy. Part of that was selling the house and renting a two bedroom apartment so Hunter had a place to stay when he came to see me. I was still not Daphne’s favorite person, but she listened to me when I needed someone to talk to about why I couldn’t straighten out my life. That was something I started learning to say anytime I wanted to blame something on anyone. The highlight of my days was calling and hearing my daughter chatter on about anything and everything. It was lonely but I needed to avoid the things that triggered me to find blame in anyone but myself. Alex seemed to see that we were making progress, but when I reverted in any way, he made sure I saw it and changed into a healthy direction. It just scared me to see that I wasn’t as over Brian as I made myself believe.

“It’s not something that will ever change, because in your eyes he was the hero you needed. You need to start seeing that Brian was just a man, one that only wanted your friendship.” Alex tells me.

“I was seeing what I wanted when he kissed me or held me.” I tell him.

“In a lot of ways Brian should have seen how you were reacting to it and stopped it before it led to you assuming things that he couldn’t reciprocate. This is not me placing blame on Brian, but pointing out that your emotional response became skewed by it.” He tells me.

“I just don’t understand why I married Ben, if you think I see Brian in my future.” I tell him.

“Michael, when Ben said that it was alright that you loved before each other he was right. You love Ben but unfortunately married him when Brian didn’t offer you what you wanted. If you had said yes to Ben without going to Brian, I don’t think we would be sitting together trying to help you. Can you honestly say that if Brian had told you to wait for him that you would have married Ben?” He asks me.

“No, I know that I would have broken up with Ben and waited.” I tell him.

“Would you have cared that it hurt Justin?” He asks me.

“I hate myself for saying this, but if Brian wanted me I would have been happy to get Justin out of our lives.” I tell him.

“Now think about what you said and then remember what you said to Brian when he hit you. For Brian, hitting a friend would have made him feel like a man who he hardly acknowledges. What you said caused more than pain than you realized.” He tells me.

“I said it because Justin had everything I believed would have made me happy. I couldn’t have been him. He put up with other men and Brian not being emotionally there for him. Brian knew that about me, that I needed someone who could devote themselves to me. I think that Brian didn’t change who he was because Justin was so young and was bound to need more experience.” I tell him.

“I think the truth lies somewhere between there. Brian enjoyed his freedom and wasn’t ready to give up a lifestyle he liked. Justin came and he wanted Justin and the lifestyle. What you don’t see is that they could both separate their relationship from it. What they did with other men had no impact on them. There are very few couples who could survive that kind of relationship, you weren’t built to survive it.” He tells me.

“I don’t think Ben is going to want to come back to me.” I tell him.

“Has he sent divorce papers?” Alex asks me.

“I got them before I got here this morning. I couldn’t sign them.” I tell him.

“If he comes back, make it so that he comes back on his own, not because of a slip of paper you didn’t make important when you should have.” He tells me.

I left Alex’s office and went to the notary to sign the papers. I wanted to give Ben the freedom to choose me if I deserved it, and to be happy if he was really through with me.

JUSTIN

I stared at the picture of my child sucking her thumb and fell in love the way I knew Brian did when he held Gus for the first time. She wasn’t in my arms, but being able to see her moving and hearing her heartbeat was as if she was here in the room with all of us. My mom was listening through my phone at my daughter’s heart beating. I know she was crying on the other end. Brian held me and watched each movement on the monitor. Mel and Lindsay were in their own world seeing the life inside Mel. 

I leaned down and kissed Mel softly for giving me this when I'd really given up the idea of having my own child. Brian pulled me back, being the caveman he can be. Gus smiled, even though he was hoping for a boy. 

“Well, Abraham is definitely a no.” Brian tells Mel.

“Kiss my...” She mouths the word ‘ass’ to him.

“I would but Justin’s is better.” He tells her.

“Well, we are looking at a very healthy little girl. I’m happy to report that you’ve reached the middle of your pregnancy and we aren’t seeing any of the problems from your last one.” The doctor tells them.

Mel hugs Jenny and I know that even with all the problems, she was worth it to Mel and Lindsay. Brian and I offered to take the kids out so Mel and Lindsay could celebrate alone. 

Brian and I celebrated deep into the night last night.

BRIAN 

I was seeing things that I never got to experience with Gus. I know I purposely missed those things because at the time I didn't know I could love the way I did the minute Gus was placed in my arms. My son gave me the capacity to love, which made it possible for me to be standing here with a man that loves as much as I have loved him. I smile as I'm sure Mel will be cursing enough to give Deb a run for her money. Justin’s not the only one who can give presents to our child's mothers. 

Justin surprised Lindsay with a painting of her, pregnant with Gus. It was one that Michael had snapped with his camera at a family dinner before Justin was in our lives. He told her that it was something he wanted for Gus to see, that he was loved before he was born. I swear he makes the munchers cry at the drop of a hat. I say this trying not to cry when baby Taylor curls her hands under her head as if going to sleep. I was saved by my baby girl when she moved again and it seems she's as flexible as her daddy when her foot appears beside her head. Only the tech starts moving the wand again.

“How did we miss that?” I hear the doctor ask the tech.

The tech started looking through her paperwork. “They cancelled the first scan last month.” She tells him. 

“We had a family emergency, what's wrong? ” Lindsay ask worried.

“Nothing if you're willing to have twins.” He tells us. 

“TWINS!” Jen yells through the phone. 

Justin stares harder as the tech moves to find baby two. I looked at Mel’s stomach but really I just thought her being big was because she was pregnant.

“How come you didn't know?” Justin asks the doctor, raising his eyebrow. 

“Twins are normally side by side but in this case your daughter was hiding well, your other daughter.” He tells Justin.

“We are so going shopping Mr Kinney.” Justin tells me. 

“I knew I could get you to shop with me.” I tell him, then give Mel a sloppy kiss for making it all possible. 

“Oh god, I actually didn’t mind that.” Mel says looking horrified.

“Hey, while I still have you in awe of me, I wanted to let you know the house is paid for and the decorator is just waiting for you to tell them what you want.” I tell them, pulling my boys out with me to protect me in case Mel comes out of her shock.

“BRIAN KINNEY GET BACK HERE.” Mel yells as Justin and Gus seem to want to preserve my last ball by running with me out of the hospital. 

LINDSAY

Jenny and I giggled at Mel and Brian. I think I’ve viewed it wrong for years, they just like to mess with each other. It’s refreshing to know that I’m still learning things about Mel even more than fifteen years later. I look back up as the tech takes the final measurements and shuts down the machines. I guess she was bigger, but she was just starting to show more this month. 

“Mel, this changes things. We need to monitor you closer than I would normally. Your weight gain is going to be more significant than your first pregnancy. It’s nothing your body can’t handle but I want to make sure you're only gaining baby weight.” He tells us and I know it’s time to get rid of some of the snacks she thinks she’s been hiding from me.

I help her up and leave her to dress, I laugh as I see Brian in the car and Justin standing there smiling as I bring Jenny out to him. I looked at Justin and could see he wasn’t scared but excited that he was having two.

“You know, the doctor at the clinic was really impressed with your sample.” I giggle, as he rolls his eyes. “Guess you were really motivated when you gave it.” I tell him.

“He’s never done anything he can’t excel at.” Brian tells me.

“Are you ready for two Justin and Mel’s to invade your world?” I ask him.

“I once had a dream that there were two of him, but alas, I woke up to the disappointment of only one. I’ll just have to mold the new ones to make us proud.” Brian tells me.

“I think I like two Mels, two of Brian would be a nightmare.” Justin tells me.

“Tell Mel I’m not budging on paying for the house. My children deserve the best.” Brian tells me.

“We could afford the house we wanted easily, you didn’t have to do this.” I tell him. 

“I didn’t like the cookie cutter house.” He mumbles. “Jenny, ice cream, we need to go.” Brian tells everyone when he sees Mel coming out.

“The house is really gorgeous, just tell Mel I wanted you closer.” Justin kisses my cheek and hops in as Brian speeds off.

I know this is going to be all kinds of fun with Mel. I turn, smiling as she glares at Brian escaping, then giggles as she pulls out her phone.

“Jen, I seriously think Brian shouldn’t drive so fast with kids in the car… Yeah, thanks.” Mel hangs up.

“What did you do?” I ask her.

“Nothing just sicked Jen on him. He might pause when Deb says something, but he comes to a full stop when it’s Jen.” She snickers.