Justin was starving. As if to confirm that fact, his stomach chose that exact moment to make itself known, with a loud and lengthy grumble that made him giggle in spite of himself. Before he headed out to the club, he had decided to stop at his preferred all night deli to get his favorite sandwich, La Speciale Italiana…a salty stack of prosciutto, cappy ham, sopressata, mozzarella, red pepper , sundried tomatoes, lettuce and tomato, graced with house Sweet Italian dressing, all served up on the most amazing sourdough roll he had ever tasted. This was a meal to die for! After a day like today, no way was he going to drink on an empty stomach; he had no doubt that things would get much weirder if he did that. Still, drinking and dancing, and hopefully a hot ass to pound into in the backroom, maybe two, that was exactly how he intended to end this otherwise very strange day.
He dug out his ringing phone as he placed his order, and moved to the other end of the counter to pick up his meal. Absentmindedly, he threw a luscious looking thick chocolate brownie on the tray as he answered the phone now nestled between his ear and his shoulder, leaving his other hand free to pay the cashier. “Hello,” he chirped, happily anticipating the treat his deprived taste buds were about to partake of. “Oh, hey Maddie. Sorry I didn’t get to talk to you before I left. Seems you had quite a successful night. The crowd around you was three deep,even long after the show had ended. I told you once your work was seen, everyone would love it as much as I do.” Finding a small corner table where he could sit and enjoy his fare, he suddenly hit the disconnect button by accident when he was startled by a loud noise just behind him….
…..
Brian had been walking aimlessly for hours, wanting to forget, yet unable to stop the traitorous thoughts running round and round in his brain like one of those motorcycle daredevils in the circus. Rev the engines and take off, let the motor idle back for a moment or two, only to find it necessary to crank it up again to get enough momentum to make the round next curve. His thoughts jumbled, his nerves frazzled, and his head pounding, he was beyond grateful when he looked at the time and found that he could soon make his way to the one place in this fucking city where sweet oblivion could be found. He’d just grab a turkey wrap on his way. No need to completely obliterate his stomach lining by following through on his plan without benefit of food to absorb at least some of what he planned to pour into it tonight. He stood back slightly from the counter to look at the huge menu board hanging on the wall above the prep station, only to have his breath catch in his throat. He would recognize that voice anywhere, no matter how long it had been since he heard it. He wanted to turn around, but his legs were not following directions at the moment. He wasn’t sure if he was more afraid that he would find it was all a colossal mistake and he hadn’t actually heard his former lover’s voice, or that it was true, and Justin was actually there, so close he could probably reach out and touch him. His stomach was in knots; it actually hurt, and his feet were frozen in place as his tray clattered to the floor…
…
Annoyed at being frightened by the racket, Justin spun around swiftly, only to have his objection quickly die on his lips. His first internal reaction was, ‘wow, what a view’, immediately followed by, “fuck, is everything I see this week going to remind me of that man?’ The man standing before him looked so much like Brian from the back that he could barely catch his breath. ‘Of course he does’ Justin thought. Everywhere he went it seemed like the whole world was in on a huge practical joke at his expense. Would it never end?
Seconds later however, the world around him stopped completely, and breathing was no longer even a remote possibility...as the man in question turned around.
“B-Brian? Is it…is that really you?”, Justin gasped as the words fell from his mouth like a sigh. His entire body began to tremble as he reached behind him for a chair to keep himself from collapsing on the floor. Tears from some combination of emotions he couldn’t possibly name fell down his cheeks before he was even aware they begun to pool in his eyes. At the same time, his face lit up with the most amazingly stunning smile Brian had seen in far too long.
Brian felt the warmth travel throughout his body just seeing that vibrant grin. It still had the same power over him that it always did – and for a moment, no words would come. Then…”Sunshine,” … Brian exhaled. As he pulled the younger man into an impassioned embrace, the current of electricity surged between them until they each jumped back as if burned. Brian stood there, eyes sparkling in wonder and awe as he took in every inch of Justin’s face. For the longest time, the two simply stared at each other. Neither man was completely convinced that the other was real, even though they had been in each other’s arms only moments before. Too afraid to move, lest it all be a dream, they each stood motionless, even their breathing shallow as they tried to come to grips with the reality of what was happening.
The man behind the counter cleared his throat for the second time. Neither Brian nor Justin had heard him the first time, nor had Justin responded to the insistent ringing of his phone as Maddie tried to reconnect with him to make sure he was ok. It wasn’t like him to hang up on someone, and she was concerned. He had looked strange when he left, and she hoped he was not coming down with something. “You want something buddy?” the deli clerk queried.
“Oh, yeah, sorry.” Brian responded. “Turkey on a whole wheat wrap...” Both men laughed as Justin added, “no mayo,” in a breathless retort. Tongue in cheek, Brian continued to grin as he asked, “Are you free, Justin? I mean, d-do you have time to sit and catch up with an old…..f-friend.?” He hated the shakiness in his voice, but at the moment there was not a damn thing he could do about it.
“S-sure,” the one word all that Justin could manage, as he sat down at the table he had chosen, glad that it was a table for two, and back along the far wall away from all other patrons at the moment. Grabbing his tray after paying his bill, Brian quietly joined him. “I see your metabolism is still as fast as ever,” the brunette teased, looking at the enormous sandwich and calorie rich dessert on Justin’s tray, and they both snickered again. For a few minutes, neither quite knew what to say, and the awkward pause left them feeling mutually off kilter as they once again gazed at each other, almost forgetting their respective meals. “So, what brings you to New York?” Justin began, and suddenly the words came pouring out as they talked for hours, sharing everything they could from the last five years. Brian told the blond all about Kinetic and the changes there. He talked about Gus, and what was going on with every other member of the ‘family’. Justin in turn told Brian about his rise to fame, highlighting some of the more interesting commissions, his first solo show, as well as the most recent one, and show pieces he had completed. He shared the plan for the pieces he was currently working on, and they each shared a bit about their hopes and dreams. As if by silent agreement, they carefully avoided the topic of their past, or the pain they had each endured in order to give the other what they thought they needed. It was as if they were back in the loft, where they had spent long hours in conversation, a fact that would surprise quite a few people back in the Pitts. Few knew that one of the things that first broke down Brian’s walls, and that he loved most about Justin, was the ease with which they could speak to each other about almost anything, and how Justin could more than hold his own in an intelligent discussion about so many subjects that it often left him dazed.
By the time they started to wind down, it was after one in the morning, but Brian still had one question that he had been dying to ask the man before him. “Are you with anyone, Justin? Is there a man in your life?”
Justin was temporarily speechless. How was he to respond to THAT question? ‘Sure, there’s a man in my life. One man, the only one that ever really mattered. I don’t see him often, only like…say…every five years….’ Oh sure, that would go over well. Brian would be up and out of there so fucking fast that Justin wouldn’t know what hit him. So, instead, he replied, “nope, no one special. Never found someone who could put up with me for very long.” Well…at least that was the truth. “I go out when I want - and do what I want WITH who I want – then I go home - and they don’t come with.”
As Brian pondered that answer, Justin asked him, “what about you, Brian? Are you still the great and powerful stud of Liberty Avenue, fucking every hunk that breathes, or has someone come along who could finally tame the wild beast, someone who could make you want to share your life with him?”
Brian just said nothing as he rolled his lips in and smiled. ‘No, Sunshine,’ he thought to himself. ‘Never could find anyone who could compare to…the one I pushed away.’ He reached up and ran his finger lightly over Justin’s lips, and could feel the man tremble under his touch, his dick twitching in response. As their eyes locked, the heat between them threatening to combust, Brian leaned forward and kissed him tenderly on the lips. Grasping the younger man’s face in his hands, he slowly let his forehead rest against Justin’s, as his thumb stroked circles on his cheek. “Please, Sunshine. I…uh…I…fuck…come back to the hotel with me, Justin. Please.”