“There…” Brian slid the platinum band on Justin's ring finger, then kissed it. “Now, we are married-- sort off.”

“You have to seal that with a kiss, Mr. Kinney.” Justin said puckering his lips and making kissy sounds.

“I'm not only sealing it with a kiss, I will seal it with a good, long, slow fuck, too.”

“Promises… promises.”

Brian smirked seductively as he proceeded to remove both their clothing and make do with his promise.

Earlier that afternoon, they went out to buy groceries but ended up buying the rings. They didn't spend so much time at the jewelry shop because they both wanted just a simple bands.

They both agreed to a plain platinum, and had their names engraved on the inside of the ring. It was a surprised to know that they could get the engraved rings just after couple of hours.

While they were waiting, they decided to do the reason they actually went out, grocery shopping.

Now that they were celebrating the progression of their relationship to another level, they both could say the day they moved into their house was a day like no other.

***

Brian and Justin, both excitedly show Gus his own room. The kid was so happy and was asking if he could sleep in there that night.

That dampened the cheeriness of the atmosphere. Brian hadn't known what to say to his son to save him from breaking his heart when he knew Gus couldn't sleep in their house. Well, not yet, at least.

Brian was planning on remedying that. He already had his mind set on telling Justin about Michael first, assuring him that no matter what happened to his memory he'd always want to be with Justin.

Then he'd introduce his partner to the ‘family’ and tell them about the state of their relationship. Maybe they could invite them to the house for lunch or dinner. That way, both Lindsay and Melanie would see his and Justin's house and Gus’ room, too. Then he'd proceed to ask permission to let Gus stay with them every Friday nights.

He was already proven to be a good dad to his son. For all he knew, he was always a good dad to Gus since he was born. According to his accountant, he had always been generously helping Lindsay and Melanie even after he signed his rights. He guessed, he wouldn't really do that if he didn't really care.

“Sorry, you can't, buddy. Uh, you know your mom and mama would miss you. They would be lonely without you there. Now, you can take your little naps while you're here, just until you are big enough to be away from mom and mama for a night. Would that be okay?”

Gus’ bottom lip was sticking out and quivering a bit. His eyes were already heavy with tears, but the kid nodded to his dad.

“Don't cry now, sonny boy. Daddy and daddy's heart love you so much. We want you to be happy here and not sad, okay? We just have to ask your mom and mama when you grow a little bit bigger. Now, give me a smile.”

Gus smiled at them and it melted the couple’s heart. 

Later that afternoon, they were all sprawled out on a sofa with Gus between them watching 101 Dalmatians. Brian was actually enjoying the movie seeing it for the first time.

They were just getting to the best part of the movie when his phone began to ring.

Brian frustratedly groaned in annoyance but took it off the table and stood to take the call. He was on his way to the kitchen when he answered.

“Hello?”

“Brian?” It was Michael, of course.

“Yeah. Why do you sound so surprised? You are calling me, aren't you?” He said while opening the refrigerator and took a bottle of water.

“Yeah-- uh, where are you?” Michael sounded a little bit distracted.

“Out with Gus.” He twisted the bottle cap and drank a few gulps.

“Where?”

“Is there any point with this call, Michael?” Brian sat on the breakfast bar.

“Well, uh-- I know you are with Gus this afternoon-- I was just thinking that you might want a little help-- we can bring him to the zoo-- or park-- I'm actually outside the loft, but you're not here--obviously.” Michael rambled on and on.

“It's too cold for either park or zoo. And I can manage to entertain my own son.” Brian brought the bottle to his lips and drank.

“I didn't mean it to sound like you couldn't handle Gus. I just-- I want to be with you guys, I guess. I thought you might like the idea.”

“Well, thank you, Michael. I appreciate the thought, but I can handle it. So… I got to go.” He threw the empty bottle in the trash can.

“Okay… So, Tuesday at the loft, see you then. Bye.”

“Bye.” Brian answered and ended the call. He ran his fingers through his hair and sighed. He forgot about Tuesday. He needed to tell Justin, he'd rather stay home and spend the evening with him but he already promised Michael. Good thing though, his partner would be off work the next day.

He went back to his little family and finished watching the movie with them. Few minutes in, with both his boys giggling profusely, Brian had forgotten about Michael and everything outside their little haven.

He drove Gus after they've eaten an early dinner and the kid was already sleeping on his shoulder as he rang the door to Lindsay and Melanie's house. 

Brian settled his kid on his bed, kissing him goodnight and walked down the stairs.

Lindsay was leaning on the wall directly facing the stairs, looking like she was waiting for him to appear. She glanced up to him when she heard his footsteps and pasted a strained smile on her face. Brian saw Melanie walking up to them from the kitchen with a mug on her hands, blowing the liquid and taking a sip.

“Brian, it's uh-- it's so nice of you to give Gus a bath and got him into pajama. I didn't pack a pair, though, so where did--”

“It's okay. I got him clean after eating dinner. That way, he could go to bed after the car ride, that always lulled him to sleep. I bought the pajamas, don't worry it's new.” Thanks to Justin, that was his idea and they bought it the other day after getting the groceries.

Melanie let out a small chuckle and Brian glanced at her curiously.

“Did he blew bubbles on your face?” She asked amusedly, like she already knew the answer.

Brian nodded and smiled. “Yeah, that he did.”

“But you don't have a tub?” Lindsay asked, looking at Brian confusedly.

Brian very well knew couldn't tell that he had a tub, a big one actually. But before he could answer, Melanie did it for him.

“Linds, you don't have to have a tub to blow bubbles.”

He left after that and instead of going home immediately, he took a detour to a gourmet candy store that he knew near Tremont.

His face broke out in a sultry grin as he secured his purchase on the passenger seat. He had a surprised for ‘his heart’ tonight. He bought a platter of chocolate coated strawberry for Justin to eat on Brian. Then he'd surprise him more by giving access to Brian’s body, in any way he pleased.

This would be a long night for them.

***

Early Monday morning, Brian called his lawyer and explained what he and Justin had decided. 

“So, is it possible to have all the legal documents prepared today?” He hopefully asked.

“Well, I can get the registration from the City office and make the affidavit for you this morning. But you also requested to change your living will, and I'm making one for your partner, then the POAs for health care and finances for both of you. After lunch, Brian, say two o'clock. Would that be okay?”

Brian smiled triumphantly. “Yeah, of course. Thanks for doing this in short notice, Nathan.”

“You're welcome. I aimed to please my clients.” He laughed softly. “Don't forget to fax your revision for the will and your partner’s copy, too.”

“Yes, I'm faxing it to you as soon as I end this call. And Nathan…” He paused. “Don't forget to put that little stipulation on the agreement.”

The lawyer was quiet for few seconds, “Brian, not that I'm prying or anything like that… but if you aren't sure about--”

“The stipulation was Justin's request.” He said conversationally. “He's just giving me an easy way out if… a big if… I would have a change of heart when my memory will come back.”

“That's… that sounds reasonable.” Nathan sounded thoughtful.

“I guess. I just-- I don't want to take anything for granted anymore. I know how life can be-- how it's there in one minute and then you turned around and it's gone. I want Justin to have legal rights that no one can disregard and I want to have that, too, when it comes to him.”

“Understandable, Brian. Most people wanted security, and with bigotry everywhere and some stupid laws nowadays, it's really not a wonder anymore if you choose to bind legally.”

“Yeah”, Brian didn't elaborate anymore and the line was silent for a while until Nathan cleared his throat.

“Well, I got to go, Brian. We need to get to work on those papers so we can get you and your partner tied the knots-- so to speak.”

As he ended the call and prepared the written wills to fax to his lawyer, he dialed Justin's phone and left him a message.

“Hey, mo chroí. Listen, my lawyer said he could have the documents ready for us to sign by two o'clock. So I'm coming to get you at one. We can swing for a burger before going to the Law firm. Okay, gotta go. See you.”

That was how their afternoon went. Nathan called him just as he was leaving to confirm that the papers were all done and ready to sign.

So they went directly to the Law firm and Brian went on introducing Justin to Nathan. Brian met him through Cynthia. After his accident, he learned that he used Melanie's services for his legal matters before, and Brian wasn't comfortable with the idea. 

He asked Cynthia for any recommendations, and Brian became Nathan’s client since then. He talked to Mel about it and she didn't really react while they were talking. But Lindsay barged into his loft the next day, telling him that he was being an asshole. It was safe to say that both ladies were livid.

Not long after, all the papers were signed and the affidavit of Domestic partnership was notarized.

“I'll ran this papers to the City to file and properly documented. They will issue a certificate and wallet card for you to have it all the time. I'll bring it to your office tomorrow together with your copy for all your legal documents. I will have one copy for my office, too.” Nathan said collecting the signed documents on his table.

“Yeah, I need the documents to give to the HR for Justin's insurance. Thanks again, Nathan.” Brian said warmly, glancing at Justin who was smiling on his side.

“No problem, I'm handsomely paid.” Nathan joked good naturedly. Then he shifted to face Justin extending his hand to shake. “Nice to meet you, Justin.”

“The pleasure is mine, Nathan.” Justin politely answered.

“Well, as I noticed that you have your rings already…” Both Brian and Justin were flushing. “You two can start the honeymoon.”

They all laughed together and they left soon after that.

When they were in the truck, they just sat there quietly for some time. Then like synchronized puppets, they both shifted to look at each other with beaming faces.

“I can't believe we are partners legally.” Justin whispered, still smiling radiantly.

Brian reached out to cup Justin's nape pulling him to rest their foreheads together. They closed their eyes and sighed happily.

“I love you.” Brian whispered.

Justin pursed his lips and whispered back, “Me too. I love you so much, Brian.” The blond closed the small gap of their mouths and kissed his partner.

Brian angled his head deepening the kiss. He invaded Justin's mouth with his tongue and moaned when Justin started to run his fingers on his hair.

“I hope to have more of that, but I know you are famished.”  Brian panted on Justin's mouth as they pulled apart. “Do you have time to eat with me before your class?”

Justin glanced at the clock on the dashboard and saw it was already 2:20 pm. 

“We can eat at Romeo's. Just a sandwich.”

“Okay.”

***

Brian came back to the office with spring on his heels. He made sure to get Cynthia a box of chocolates as a gift to her. The occasion, well, he just got married-- sort of.

Cynthia just gaped at him when he placed the box in front of her.

“What's this for?” She asked bewildered.

“For you.” He smiled.

Cynthia looked up at him blinking rapidly, saying, “Well, thank you.”

“You're welcome.”

Then he walked to his office closing the door gently. Cynthia stared at the box for some minutes more and actually got a little sad. Brian seemed to really had moved on and was so happy with it. She just couldn't stop thinking about his boss’ ex-boyfriend. She couldn't stop thinking how she knew that Brian truly loved him.

But maybe the ex-boyfriend had moved on too. Maybe they were this star crossed lovers who were doomed to fail from the start. But didn't mean they weren't each other's one true love.

Everything had really changed after Brian's accident. She guessed, the relationship was already on its way out even before he had amnesia. Brian was always in bad mood at that time. She remembered how the agency was like, pink slips were issued like they were gift vouchers; she was beginning to think that the scowl on his face was already permanent. Brian was working longer than he usually did, and the absence of that mischievous twinkle in Brian's eyes were imminently lacking.

That started also the notable absence of the ex-boyfriend’s name on Brian's mouth. Brian was never an out romantic type of guy, but Cynthia knew when he was thinking about his boyfriend, Brian would mention his name so randomly with that far away look in his eyes.

But before the accident, Brian never mentioned his ex’s name for months.

Sometimes, she even thought that the reasons Brian hadn't yet gotten his memory back was because he really didn't want to. It had already been two years and as far as she knew, he hadn't had even a glimpse of his past eleven years. Cynthia thought that the amnesia was Brian's way of forgetting some of his painful memories. Maybe it was a way for his subconscious to act in order to move on.

Either way, as she could see it, Brian was moving on and she shouldn't wallow on a failed relationship that wasn't even her own… but still.

She sighed as she opened the box and took one piece of the chocolate. “True love prevails.” She said to herself before shoving the candy to her mouth.

***

As they sat the next morning in Starbucks, Justin and Brian still have that euphoric expressions on their faces. They were like two teenagers having make out sessions and doing goo-goo eyes at each other in a corner table of a coffee shop before going to class.

Seth had already teased them that if they could get anymore sweeter, the place would be full of ants from floor to ceiling.

They all laughed at the visuals of it.

“Brian, about yesterday, I didn't know that I already had your power of attorney. When did you decide to do that?” Justin asked after a while.

“Over a month ago.” He looked at his partner. “I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I just-- I felt I needed to do it. Who knows what would happen to me, I already have amnesia and we don't know what another blow to my head would do to me. I don't want you to just look from the outside. Whatever happens, I want you beside me. I trust you with my life.”

“I trust you, too, Brian, and thanks for making me this happy.”

Brian smiled, then in a split second, he looked at Justin anxiously. He knew he needed to tell Justin about Michael. He wanted to be completely honest with him, especially now that they were legally partners. Brian wanted to do it right and he knew the time to tell Justin the truth had finally come. There were no reason to delay it any further.

“Mo chroí?” He called softly. Justin loved when Brian called him that, but Brian sounded so troubled all of a sudden..

“Yeah?” Justin began to worry.

“I have to tell you something very important.” Brian said in a small voice and Justin felt cold air running through his spine.

“What, Brian?” Justin knew his voice shook a little.

“Tonight.” Brian nodded, as if he was talking to himself. “Tonight, I'll tell you tonight.” He reached for Justin's hand and squeezed it.

The blond looked at Brian worriedly. “Okay. I'll be home waiting.”

They were silent for awhile, the tension was palpable.

“Trust me, Justin, okay? I'm asking you to trust me.” Brian looked uncomfortable and unsure, Justin hadn't seen that look since they met in this very same place.

Justin wondered what Brian would tell him. Why was he acting like he was about to bolt? Was it about his amnesia and his memory loss? Did Brian remember anything? A shiver ran down his spine.

They were in heaven until just few minutes ago. What had happened? Why was Brian going on and on about trusting him? 

Justin couldn't say anything instead nodded his head in acceptance.

“Okay, so, I need to go.” Brian said still looking warily at Justin. “Seth is waving already for you.”

Justin glanced up at his friend and nodded at him, then he looked at Brian and tried to give him a smile. Brian kissed him and whispered, “I love you”, to Justin's ear.

He stood there for few moments more watching his partner walking out the shop looking somber. He didn't understand what had happened when one minute they were kissing and so high with everything that was happening to them. But in a blink of an eye, Brian looked like the world had suddenly collapsed on him.

“Everything's okay, bud?” Seth asked when he finally walked to the counter and began to take orders.

“Yeah, sure.” He said sounding uncertain. Seth looked at him then nodded.

Justin worked the whole morning in automatic. His mind was so preoccupied about the ‘talk’ that he'd have with Brian later that evening. 

He wasn't doing much better in his classes. He found himself spacing out more times than he cared to admit.

At six, he went straight home and started to pace in the living room. He knew he might be overreacting, but there was something nagging at the back of his head and his conscience was already hitting him so hard. He was so afraid of what Brian might have to say. Was is possible that Brian had…

He almost jumped when his phone was ringing. In the quietness of the house, the sound seemed like a blaring horn.

He took the offending machine with a shaking hand. It was Brian.

***

In a way, Brian regretted saying anything to Justin. He knew his partner would worry the whole day and it was so cruel of him to put him in that situation.

He wanted to call and leave a message for Justin, but he also knew that it wouldn't do any good, he didn't know what to say.

The whole day, he focused on doing his job. He told Cynthia that he didn't want to be disturbed except for very important calls. He turned his phone off, too.

Nathan dropped off all the notarized papers, legal documents, Domestic partnership certificate and wallet cards in his office before lunchtime. He felt a little better after holding the papers.

When Nathan left, he immediately went to HR and submitted all the necessary documents to include Justin in his insurance. The guy working there, Vincent, teased him that he'd file the papers as soon as possible before Brian could change his mind. Brian gave him a confident look and smiled, saying, “Go ahead, file it. But I'm never changing my mind about it.”

“Lucky guy.” Vincent said, smiling at Brian.

Then he went back to his office again and didn't stop working.

At quarter to six, he stood up and stretched his back. He sat for way too long and his back was killing him. He shouldn't forget that his body was thirty three and not twenty two like he was always thinking.

Cynthia came inside as he was clearing his desk. He put some papers he needed to work on tonight and their legal documents in his briefcase.

“I'm going, Brian. Do you need anything?” Cynthia asked looking at him strangely.

“Nah. I'll walk out with you.” Brian answered, carrying his briefcase and they both left the room.

The elevator ride down the lobby was uneventful. They had few staff with them inside the elevator car and whatever Cynthia was dying to ask him, she didn't get any chance of doing.

Maybe Cynthia didn't have anything to ask, Brian was skittish all day that he began to get paranoid.

But then before they bid goodbye, he saw her looking down on his ring. Now, he knew what was on her mind.

When he was inside his truck, he sat there for a moment and remembered about his phone. He fished it out of his pocket and turned it on. Just as the device started to light up, it rang in his hand.

It was Michael.

He sighed and answered it, “Michael”.

“Brian, I've been calling you all afternoon! Why'd you turned your phone off?” Michael was sounding pissed off.

“I was working, Michael. I was so busy.”

“I called your secretary, Cynthia, but she won't put me through. She said you were busy.”

“I just told you that, you should believe her. So… why are you calling?” God, he needed to go home to Justin and shower.

“Why am I calli-- are you fucking kidding me?” His friend was shrieking.

“Michael, please, I'm so tired. I want to go home.”

“Brian, you promised! You promised we will get together tonight. We are outside your building frozen like a Popsicle, then you're telling me you've forgotten?”

Brian banged his head on the steering wheel. God, couldn't he get a fucking break?

“Michae--” Brian started to say, Justin needed him.

“Brian, please… Ted and Emmett are with me. We don't get to hang out anymore. I want to celebrate my being a father to all my friends. Please, Brian. Besides, we are here already and you are coming in any minute now. What are you going to do, slam the door on our faces?”

Brian sighed resignedly.

“Two hours, Michael. Only two hours. I need to finish some work.” Okay, he could stay at the loft for couple of hours, then he'd go home. He'd call Justin, he hope his partner wouldn't get pissed at him.

“Okay. Hurry! We are freezing.”

“I'm coming.”

He dialed Justin's phone as he was leaving the parking lot. It rang three times before his partner answered and when he did, he sounded a bit anxious.

“Brian?”

“Mo chroí.” Brian wanted Justin to feel at ease and secured, he didn't mean to make him nervous all day.

“Yeah? Are you on your way?” He asked timidly.

“Uh, Justin, listen, I'm on my way but not to our house. I'm going to the loft.”

“Brian-- why--what's going on, Brian? Why aren't you coming home?” Justin was distraught. His voice was obviously shaking.

Brian felt awful. Justin was in obvious distress and he wasn't making it any better. He decided to pull over on the side of the road so he could give his full attention to his partner.

“Justin, hey, listen. You misunderstand, I didn't mean I'm not going home to you tonight, because I am. I'll always come home to you, always remember that. Okay?” 

When he heard a faint “Okay” from his partner, he continued.

“I forgot to tell you that I agreed to have a little celebration with Michael, Ted and Emmett at the loft. It's about Michael being a father. I'll be home in two hours.”

“So, we're okay?” Justin asked tentatively and it broke Brian's heart to hear his partner so unsure like that.

“Of course, Justin. Please, don't worry too much. I didn't mean to make you feel like this, it wasn't my intention.”

He heard Justin sighed in relief.

“Okay. Just take care, Brian.” Brian could hear him sounding a bit fine.

“I love you, mo chroí.”

“I love you, Brian.”

Brian felt lighthearted after that conversation. It still wasn't over, he needed to tell Justin about Michael and he needed to tell him tonight. He also needed to make him understand that what he and Michael had before was over. And whatever might happen, he would always be with Justin.

He started to drive again and after seven minutes, he was parking in front of the loft’s building.

Michael was on him the second he opened his truck’s door.

“What the hell, Brian!” He shouted, hugging his parka onto himself.

“I think my nuts have already fallen off.” Emmett rolled his eyes at him.

“Always fashionably late.” Ted snarked.

He opened the door to the building and let his guests passed, who had each a pack of beers in each hands. 

“Wow, that's a lot of beers you got there.” He observed. The guys thought they'd all get wasted. Maybe they were, but not Brian.

“Let's parteyyy, Brian!” Emmett sing songed as they rode the elevator.

“Order the dinner for us, Mikey.” He said as they all lined up to enter the loft.

Michael took the phone and started to order as Emmett kept the beers they brought inside the fridge, bringing two packs to the living room.

Ted was already perusing the remote and comfortably sat on the sofa and Brian went to the bedroom to get changed.

The loft was pristine and Brian made a mental note to give his cleaning lady a Christmas bonus. He hang his suit and checked what clothes he could use that he left at the loft.

When he went out and joined his friends, he found them all sprawled out on the sofa watching a survivor reruns.

“Come, Brian!” Michael waved jovially at him with a beer on his hand.

“Good thing I thought about bringing peanuts, you don't have anything, not a thing in your fridge and cupboards. Not even cereals. What are you eating?” Emmett said looking aghast.

“You're making the restaurants more money, Brian. I can come and cook for you sometimes, it's no big deal.” Michael trying to insinuate himself again.

Brian shook his head. “Thanks, but no thanks Michael. I can manage just fine.”

“I know I haven't come here in so long, but did you change anything?” Emmett observed looking curiously around.

“I thought so at first. But I noticed it's just the computers and his movie collections. Did you throw them, Bri?” Ted said looking expectantly at him.

“No. I want to upgrade my computer and the movies, I stored them.”

“Where? Each one for your tricks?” Ted sarcastically asked. He heard Emmett snorted then laughed with Ted.

Michael had a proud smile on his face that made Brian sick to his stomach. He thanked god that Justin wasn't anything like Michael who would be happy to share him to all the gays of the world. 

“Well, that's Brian for you. He could nail three guys in an hour. I've seen it, many, many times.” Michael shared with a shit eating grin pasted on.

“Of course, then he'd kick them like yesterday's trash.” Ted snarled.

“Ted, what do you expect? They are called tricks for reason.” Michael again, who opened another can of beer.

He stood up to go to the kitchen and took a bottle of water from the fridge. He fished his phone out and checked if Justin messaged him. Seeing that he had none, he placed it on the counter twisting the cap and drank the water.

When he walked back to the living room, Emmett was looking at him like he had just grown another head.

“You were never in Babylon or even Woody's in two years, where do you hunt now?” Emmett asked suspiciously.

Brian just shrugged and drank his water.

“Brian, why aren't you drinking? Have you had anything before coming home? Of course, you have, why I even bother asking.” Michael laughed at his own joke.

Brian started to have a headache. God, how he was friends with these people. He just wanted to go home to his partner.

When the buzzer sounded, he opened the door and pay for the food. Michael came and helped him put the bags at the counter. He excused himself and went to the bathroom and took his time to take a piss and washed his face.

When he went out, Ted and Emmett were setting the food on the dining table while Michael was hovering the counter.

“Brian, who's Mo?” Michael asked, looking dubiously at him.

“Mo? I don't know any Mo.” Brian answered with a shrug.

“And what a strange name, totally stupid.” Michael chortled. “But how did it get to your phone?”

“What do you mean?” Brian went to get his silverware from the drawers.

“Well…” He pointed to Brian's phone. “Someone called your phone. It was Mo Chroey. If you don't know him, how'd you get his phone number in your--”

Brian's hand stilled. “What? Why didn't yo--”

Brian didn't finish what he was about to say because he sprinted to the bathroom in a flash with his phone in hand. Michael, Ted and Emmett were left with mouths hanging opened.

Brian dialed his partner’s phone and tapped his fingers on the counter as he waited for him to answer.

“Brian? Hey, sorry to disturb you.” Justin apologized but sounding a little mischievous. Brian slowly smiled as he imagined his partner lying on their bed, naked.

“Hey, mo chroí. I missed you.” He whispered.

“I missed you, too. Uh-- I am fixing a salad, I was just wondering if you are going to eat with me. I don't want to make too much if you won't.”

So, he wasn't in bed naked. He was in kitchen tossing vegetables. But the image was just as sexy. Brian smiled.

“I'll eat with you.” He'd eat small portion with his friends, that way he could still sit and eat with Justin.

“Okay. I'll wait for you, then.” Justin said sounding a bit jolly.

But before Brian could answer, the door to the bathroom was being pushed opened and Michael came in smiling. The door wasn't completely closed and Brian knew Michael had eavesdropped on his conversation.

“Hey! There you are, what took you so long? I've been waiting for you, the food is getting cold.” Michael said as he barged in, he was almost yelling. Then he closed the door and leaned on it. Brian couldn't act fast enough as Michael talked again. “Who's on the phone, babe? I'm sure not as important as me. Let's eat and then you can eat me later.”

Brian's face had paled considerably. Michael looked at him then to the phone that was still attached to his ear. Justin on the other hand was quiet, so awfully quiet and Brian didn't like it a bit.

“Mo chroí? I'll call you again.” Brian's voice was pleading, he knew it, but he didn't care because Justin was still quiet. The silence on the other line was deafening.

“Babe, who are you talking to? The dinner is waiting--”

Brian couldn't believe the gall of this man and he was starting to see red. He knew Michael was doing this deliberately.

He must've connected the dots after what he had heard from outside his bathroom. Brian's sleeping somewhere else, Gus talking about daddy's heart, and how Brian talked on his phone just now was just a confirmation.

“Shut up! Shut the fuck up!” Brian shouted on his best friend, then he passed by Michael and yanked the door open. 

Brian's demeanor shifted as he went back to speak to the phone. “Hello…” His voice softened and borderline desperation. “Mo chroí, talk to me… Please.”

Brian stood at the foot of his bed, pacing so nervously.

Justin still hadn't said anything and Brian was so worried. Then a faint whimper was heard and Brian felt like dying. He needed to go to his partner.

“Wait for me, I'm coming. Mo chroí, do you hear me? I'm coming to you.” He said to the phone and regretfully ended the call and pocketed it.

With a heavy heart, Brian walked down the steps and went to Emmett and Ted who were standing frozenly on their feet. He surmised that they heard what he said to Justin on the phone when he was in the bedroom.

“Listen, I'm sorry but I need to cut this party short. I'll wait for you two to pack the food and bring it with you. I need to go out immediately--” Brian tried to explain but was being cut by his obnoxious ex-boyfriend.

“Brian! You can't just throw us out! Why are you acting like this? Who's that schmuck you were talking to? Why are you going to him?! Brian, you are not going!” Michael was in his scorned ex-boyfriend mode, but Brian didn't care.

“You shut up! You fucking shut up or god help me I'm going to knock the daylight out of you.” Then he walked to the table after taking the bags from the counter, sealing the lid for each containers then putting it back inside the bags.

“Brian-- that's okay. We can just leave the food here. We can go--” Emmett said walking to take his and Ted’s jacket.

Brian shook his head, turning to them with the packed bags of food in hands. “No one will eat that. It's better for you to take it. I'm really sorry.”

Brian gave the bags to Ted who was looking bewildered. Brian took his briefcase from his desk and opened the loft door. He saw Emmett was about to go to the coffee table to clean the scattered peanuts and empty cans of beer, but he stopped him. He told Emmett not to bother, and that he'd call his cleaning lady the next day to clean everything. He said he really needed to go.

Ted was pulling Michael with him, and for once, he was shutting his mouth. When they were all outside the loft, Brian locked and enabled the alarm, then apologized again to his friends before running down the flights of stairs like he was being chased by the devil himself. The last thing he heard from his friends, was Ted’s voice asking no one in particular, “Who is Mo Chroí?”

Brian sped off the road and didn't care if he'd broken the speed limit. This was an emergency, he needed to go home to Justin. 

God, Justin. 

He hoped they would survive that night. He hoped that Justin loved him enough to understand why he hid something so important like this from him.

He was parking at their garage after fifteen minutes. Brian flew out of his truck and went inside the house.

“Justin?!” He called out to the quiet house. “Justin!”

He turned to the living room and dining room, but Justin was nowhere to be found. He ran the stairs two steps at a time and threw open their bedroom door.

The room was pitch dark saved for the glow that was illuminated from the street lights through their windows. His eyes flickered to their bed and his heart fell to his stomach as he saw it empty.

When he was about to turn around and go, he saw something moved on the couch by the window. When he squinted his eyes, he saw a shadow on one end huddling on himself.

“Justin…” He whispered. God, his eyes were already heavy with tears and he still hadn't said anything. But all he knew, Justin was hurting and it was because of his cowardice.

He stepped inside their room and made a beeline to the couch. When he was in front of Justin, he knelt down and took Justin's hands on his. He squeezed it a little then kissed it.

“Justin, let me explain. Let me explain, please.” Brian started to say. He waited if Justin would say anything but he didn't.

“What I told you this morning, the talk that we supposed to have tonight was something that I know I should've told you long before tonight. But…” He felt a tear rolled down his cheek. “... but I was so scared. I was terrified that you wouldn't understand and decided that I'm not worth the risk you would be putting yourself to.”

He released Justin's left hand to wipe the tears on his cheek. Then caught the hand back again pressing it together with his. He felt he was getting strength from it.

“I'm sorry. I'm sorry if I tried to hide the fact that I was in a relationship before I had the accident.” He felt Justin's body became rigid. Then he shivered slightly, his breath  hitched on his throat.

“I cannot remember anything but as it was explained to me, I was in a relationship for a long time. We… Michael and I were together for nine years.”

“What?” Justin's asked incredulously. He sounded so appalled and his body shivered again. Brian stood up from the floor and sat beside his partner and hugged him close to his body.

“I know. I was so shocked when I learned about it, too. I mean, from what I could remember, Michael was like brother to me, but then-- it was crazy.” He took a deep breath. “He wanted us to continue our relationship but… I couldn't. I have tried--”

“Oh god…” Justin whimpered. He extricated his hands from Brian's hold placing it on his face and cried. He shook his head over and over. “No… no…”

He brought his partner back to his arms, kissing his head lovingly. Brian was crying, too. He couldn't believe he was hurting the man who made his life complete.

“Justin, please… I need you to understand. I need to tell you, that before meeting you, I tried everything that I could to save that relationship. I didn't abandon it just because I couldn't remember any of it. Please don't think that I'm a horrible person for breaking the nine years I have with him. I swear I gave myself the chance to have that feelings back for Michael. I thought I owe us that at least, but… I just couldn't love him more than the brotherly love that I had, that I always have for him. So I told him that it was over. And I swear it was over, Justin. It was over long before I met you.”

Justin started to sob again. “I shouldn't have-- God, I should-- this is not--”

“Mo chroí, please. This is why it was so hard to tell you. I'm so scared that you'd be afraid and leave me. I mean, who would want to be in a relationship with me when they know I have an eleven years memory loss? Then on top of that, I was in love with my best friend and have been together for nine years until I forgot that I was in love with him. Who would want to risk loving me when there is a big possibility that my feelings for Michael would come back when I finally remember everything? I know that you would start to doubt me and I don't want that. I'm so sorry for not being completely truthful to you… I was just so scared of losing you, Justin.”

Brian closed his eyes as tears rolled on his face. He tightened his grip on his partner praying that Justin would at least understand him and give them another chance. 

Few minutes passed, Justin's sobbing subsided a bit and leaned his head on Brian's shoulder. That small gesture made Brian breathe a little easier and he kissed his partner’s temple.

“I love you so much, Justin. Have always been since I first saw you. I promised you that I will always going to be with you, that I'll always, always love you.”

Justin wound one arm around his waist and Brian's breathe hitched. He was so happy that at least Justin wasn't kicking him out of their house.

“You are my heart, Justin. They can take my memories again and again, but my heart would always find you. That's how much I love you. Please, stay with me. Give me another chance to prove how much I love you. I promise that I will not hide anything from you. I love the life that we share, our commitment for each other. I hope I didn't ruin everything for us.”

Justin slipped his other arm around Brian's back and linked his fingers together on Brian's side, his head was still resting on the brunet's shoulder. Justin was hiccupping a little but nevertheless had settled down.

“I told you that I would be with you… I will stay by your side, Brian, until you'll tell me you wanted me out of your life. As long as you love me, I'll always, always be here loving you, too.” Justin whispered as he felt his tears rolling down his cheeks.

Brian couldn't contain his happiness and hugged his partner tightly. “Thank you, thank you… I promised, Justin, my heart will always find you.”

They stayed huddled together on the couch. Justin hadn't stopped shivering, though. When Brian asked if he was alright, he said he would be okay… a little shaken but he would be okay.

Brian knew Justin was trying to be strong, trying so hard to be okay, but they both know that Justin was still hurting. Honestly, they were both hurting but Brian knew that they would heal together, too.

Brian had never felt so drained and elated at once. He never thought he could be so terrified in his life. He could finally breathe a little easier after overcoming the first hurdle in their relationship. Well, there would still be rough patches here and there, but Brian would do everything in his power to make Justin feel he was the only one for Brian, and that would only change if his heart stopped beating.

“Brian… Who told you … about your past relationship?” Justin's voice was a bit tense again but his body was comfortably hugging Brian's.

“Michael.” He sighed remembering how incredulous he thought it was upon learning it the first time. “Twas the day I woke up from coma. He was acting a bit--uh, touchy and was calling me this stupid pig name. I thought he was just shaken from my accident but then he kissed me-- not our usual smack, but… It was intimate, a lot intimate. I pushed him away asking what he was doing… then he told me.” Brian shook his head. “I didn't believe him, I was so shocked but he swore to me that he was telling me the truth and Michael would never lie to me.”

“Did you…?” Justin faltered in his question, he sounded like he was afraid of asking it.

“Did I what?” Brian asked softly.

“Uh-- The kiss?” The blond whispered.

Brian surmised that Justin wasn't only afraid of asking but he was also dreading his answer.

“The kiss? You mean if I enjoyed it or loved it?” He felt his partner's head nodded.

“Honestly, no. I was shocked at that time especially when he uh-- inserted his tongue and moaned. It was... distressing. And when he tried to touch me-- I felt violated. When he didn't stop coming onto me and took advantage every time he got, I felt disgusted.”

They were quiet for few seconds but Brian wanted to clear this issue with Justin.

“It's what got me all so confused, you know. My mind could have forgotten about him but I should've at least be familiar with his touch after being together for nine years, instead of feeling repulsive to it. How can you loved a man for that long and when your memory had gotten erased, you couldn't even fathom to intimately kiss him?”

Justin let out a deep breath and stayed soundless for a while. When he speak again, his voice was noticeably shaky.

“You said, you've tried getting your feelings back, what do you mean by that?”

“After the shock-- I thought, if we were together for nine years, I must've really loved him so much. I mean, you have to, right? It was a long time to be with only one man. So, I asked him to give me time to sort my emotions out. I tried-- I really did. Sometimes-- I uh-- kissed him back or let him grope me a little just to see my physical reaction or if I would have that sparks again. I tried for few months-- trying so hard-- because I felt that I needed to know, I needed to be sure-- I owe us that at least. But-- there was really none.”

“Did you two… ?

“Have sex?” Justin stiffened but nodded a little. “No. I couldn't even pass the kissing, I might've hurled at him if I see him naked. But it wasn't from his lack of trying because he did every chance he got. Once, the first night I was back at my loft, everyone was there earlier to welcome me back and Michael refused to go home when everyone left. I was so tired to argue so I let him clean up, but I woke up with him almost lying on my chest. I had a broken ribs and I was still hurting and so I went to the sofa and slept there. I woke up again with some sound and a feeling where I know I didn't like. Then I realized that the sound was Michael's moaning and he was licking my neck and touching my chest. He was also dry humping my thigh. I decided to let it go for a while to see my reaction, to see if I would get hard. But as the time passed, I could literally feel my stomach recoiling. I just couldn't. He really did try though-- I just learned how to evade it, I mastered it actually.”

“Why didn't you tell him straight away then? Were you that desperate to love him again?” His voice was surprisingly stern.

“It took me long enough to finally tell him that I don't want to get back together. But it wasn't because I was in doubt of my decision or still have this hope, as a matter of fact, I have known it was over after less than a week since he told me about it. The reason… Michael was my friend and the only friend I could remember. The others were all strangers to me. I felt so alone and I was scared shitless. Michael was there for me all that time. He was the only constant thing in my life that I could remember and I don't want to hurt him anymore than I already have.”

“What happened when you told him it was over?”

“He refused to accept it. He still trying to come onto me. Justin, uh-- two months ago, I was at the loft after a long day at the office-- I was taking a shower and thinking about you. I swear I didn't hear him coming inside the loft. I just noticed when he came inside the shower.”

Justin tried to push Brian and he was breathing heavily. Brian didn't let him though, he instead held Justin closer to him.

“Nothing happened, I promised. He tried to kiss me but I threatened to call the cops on him. I didn't talk to Michael for weeks… it got me a bit shaken. That was before we went to New castle. You helped me a lot to forget about it. When I'm with you, everything just seems right.”

Brian was so drained, but he was grateful that his partner had listened to him and trying to understand the predicament they were in.

“Have you tried talking to your other friends about you and Michael? I mean--”

“No. They know about us, of course-- we've been together for nine years. They all must be a part of it in one way or another, and it must've been hard for them to see it end. But, no, I didn't have any conversations with anyone of them regarding it. I have a hard time connecting with them and I guess, we just all drifted away. I'm not comfortable talking about my personal life-- not with Theodore and Emmett, or the girls either. It's been two years, yet, they still see and talk to me like the guy they knew before the accident. They were doing that tonight.” Brian sounded desolate.

“Not even Debbie or Vic?”

Brian shook his head. “Vic was sick, he was in and out of the hospital since my accident, then he moved in with Rodney. I'm not that close to him to begin with. But I liked the way we talked when we were in South Beach. That was the first time we have that kind of conversation.” Brian sighed.

“And Debbie… She was trying to do everything, taking care of Vic, working double shifts. She tried to be there for me and I did appreciate it, but sometimes she just couldn't hold her tongue. I really hate it when she does that especially in front of Gus. To the point I don't want to attend Sunday dinners in her house anymore. Then we really don't talk that much now.”

Justin nodded a little, looking like he was thinking so deeply.

“Don't think about it too much. I believe everything happens for reason, you know. I'd gladly do everything that had happened to me again and again when in the end I got to be with you.” Brian kissed Justin's head.

“What if… Brian, what will happen when you get your memory back and you will remember everything-- you might find out you don't really love me that much. Brian--”

Brian was about to say something when Justin put his index finger on his mouth to stop him.

“Brian, I want you to promise me that when you feel you can't be with me anymore, just be honest okay? I promised to understand and respect your every decisions.” Justin was beginning to tear up again.

“Why wouldn't I want to be with you? I love you so much, Justin. I told you, you are my heart and I can't survive without it.” Brian hugged him even tighter.

“We don't know the future, Brian. As much as I wanted us to be together for a long, long time-- you of all people should know that nothing is permanent in this world. Tonight wouldn't be the first and last that we'd have trouble in our relationship.”

“Then we'll just have to remind each other how we feel. Justin, I asked you to hold on to me. Whatever happens, please don't let me break us up. Fight for us, Justin… fight for me.”

Brian put his index finger on Justin's chin to lift it up. 

“Promise me, mo chroí. Please, promise me.” He pleaded.

Justin was still looking at him. His eyes were filled with tears and it fell down quickly on his face.

“I will fight for you, Brian. Unless you'd tell me that you won't want me to anymore, I'll always fight for you.”

Brian realized that Justin always ended his answers with Brian being the only one who could change what they had.

He guessed, he could understand that. This what made Brian so hesitant to tell Justin about Michael and him, he knew it would plant a seed of doubt in his partner's head, and Brian didn't like it. He didn't like it a lot.

***

It was almost midnight when they moved to the bed and laid spooning. They didn't usually want to lie down this way but tonight Justin wanted the little privacy it gave him by facing away from his partner.

He was so confounded and furious about what he had heard from Brian. It made him mad to the point he just wanted to scream and had a fist fight with Michael, to hell with the consequences. 

He was so angry with himself, too. Everything was so fucked up, and his partner was the one being abuse most of all. He didn't have any idea that Brian was being subjected into this.

Justin couldn't even start to imagine how Brian must have felt when he realized eleven years of his life had been erased. He couldn't fathom how terrified and alone Brian must've felt. 

In a way, he understood everything what Brian had told him. Everything from his reactions, decisions and even the indecisions, we're all logically possible and fathomable.

But it didn't cease the pain he was feeling for Brian. The guilt and enraged were stabbing on Justin's core. Their lives had all been turned upside down and Brian hadn't even known half of it.

Justin's tears fell down as his heart was crying with regret. Justin was in a place where he knew he had a very huge decision to make, and couldn't procrastinate on it any longer. However, that decision could cost him Brian and the life they were building together. The life that Justin had always wanted.

***

Justin woke up the next day with the most beautiful sight he had ever seen. Brian was sitting on the side of the bed looking down at him with a smile that he knew was only reserved for him.

Justin smiled back and croaked, “Hey”.

Brian reached out to gently caress his cheek and uttered, “Hey”.

“Why are you awake this early?” Justin held the hand that was still on his cheek.

“I just want to make breakfast for my spouse.”

Justin stilled for a second but then his face softened and a smile was slowly creeping from his lips.

“Our partnership certificate was released yesterday. Nathan came to my office and gave all the legal documents. So, it's official. You are my spouse and I'm yours…” He leaned down and kissed Justin. “... always.”

Justin was about to tear up when Brian said, “Hey, hey, no crying on this day. Today, we will celebrate our life being as one. I want us to always remember this day for the rest of our lives. And…” He turned to lift the breakfast tray he had settled on the side table and placed it on Justin's lap. Then he took his camera from the bed and smilingly said, “..... we will start that by taking pictures so we could reminisce when we are old and gray.”

Justin chuckled but poised to give Brian more room on the bed for them to take the picture. Brian placed his arm on Justin's shoulder bringing their face side by side. He clicked the camera twice and checked if the pictures were good.

“We look incredible, my heart.”

Justin smiled happily at the endearment, it would never grow old with him.

“Wait, let's take a picture showing our rings.”

They posed again, but this time they were showing off their rings with twin ecstatic smiles.

They ate the breakfast that Brian prepared, then spent a lot of time showering.

Brian gave Justin his partnership wallet card and kept the rest of the legal documents in their safe.

Their afternoon went by just hanging out together. The predicament they were in had almost been forgotten, but Brian had to open up again just to make sure Justin had understood Brian would stand by their commitment as long as they lived.

But Justin had his own dilemma that he needed to face himself, too. Sooner or later, he knew if he wouldn't address it, it would come back and bit him in the ass. Well, it already started to come back and slapped him on his face.

He just didn't know if he was strong enough to actually do it. And when he'd have the courage to finally say it, there would be a huge possibility that Brian would never, ever forgive him from what he did. 

Justin just hoped that after all the storms had calmed down, Brian could still say right to his face that he was still ‘his heart’, and that he would still love him the same.