JUSTIN

“What the hell is that?” Emmett asked.

“Are they holding hands?” Blake asks

“What are you looking at?” Deb asks us.

“That.” Emmett pointed. 

Brian turned around in the booth and Ted looked over to see what Emmett and Blake were staring at. Mel and I were sitting at the booth behind them with the kids, we both looked out the window in time to see Michael and Lindsay kiss each other as they came in the door. It would have been more convincing if they didn’t both look as if they had sucked on lemons afterwards. Brian snickered and turned back around to read the contracts that Ted brought with them. Deb scooted me over then laid her head on my shoulder shaking with laughter. 

Michael and Lindsay sat at a booth by the front holding hands and then leaned over the table to kiss again, Deb, who looked, started laughing even harder. Michael looked around while the rest of the diner seem to be in fits of laughter or making snorting giggle noises. 

“Ma, why not sit with us?” Michael yelled, and Deb got up and ran to kitchen, still laughing.

“Don’t worry Pumpkin, everyone will get used to us.” Michael tells Lindsay, who cringed at the pet name.

“Darling, it only matters what we think of our relationship.” She tells him cooing at him.

Emmett walks over and feels their heads, then comes back to the table.

“No fever, so it can’t be delirium.” He announces.

“Maybe they finally snapped when they couldn’t get Brian to listen to them.” Blake tells us.

“OR MAYBE, Lindsay and I realized what we meant to each other.” Michael tells us, standing over Blake glaring.

“Well we know that Lindsay has the occasional yen for a dic… Salami.” Emmett tells us, smiling at Joseph and Gus when they seemed to be paying close attention.

“Last we all checked they seem to have that in common, so Michael, when did you come out in reverse?” Ted asks.

“We realized that we wanted to raise a family in a more traditional way. Michael lent me a shoulder to cry on, when I found out that the people who we thought were family obviously didn’t understand what family means.” Lindsay tells us, staring at Brian.

“I realized that Lindsay was what I was missing from my life, right Babe.” He tells her reaching up to kiss her cheek. 

“We hope everyone can be happy for us, Lindsay is joining me in my business, we wanted to share everything.” He tells us, smiling up at her. 

“Well, we need to get going. Mel, we will be contacting you about our visitation with the children. Brian we would love to have Justin’s children come over too.” Lindsay tells us, dragging Michael behind her out the door.

“Mama, why is mommy kissing Uncle Mikey?” Gus asks, wrinkling his nose.

“Not sure Gus, but maybe you can ask her when she calls you.” Mel tells him.

“Dad, so when you said he was gay, did that mean happy?” Kayla asked Brian.

Which set us all off laughing, Deb peeked out of the kitchen and ran to the door to watch them walking down the street. Poor Hunter was staring and ran into the door. 

After that the rest of the week became Lindsay and Michael trying to show everyone they were a couple. Ted and Blake let us know that Lindsay and Michael had dinner with Lindsay’s parents, showing off a ring.

“I actually heard Ron say Mel wasn’t nearly as bad as this, when they passed our table, leaving Lindsay and Michael sitting together. Nancy said at least Mel knew how to hold a fork.” Blake tells us giggling.

“I don’t know if that’s really a compliment or not.” Mel tells us.

“Honey, they actually called Darren to see if he could plan their engagement party. Oh, and asked him to not include me as I wouldn’t understand what commitment means.” Emmett tells us, rolling his eyes.

They called Mel to take Jenny and Gus for a ‘family weekend’, but ended up having to bring them home when Gus didn’t want to stay with Michael and Jenny cried nonstop for Mel. Which led to the two of them arguing in front of Gus, who was only too happy to tell Mama and Dad what they said.

“Uncle Mikey said they’ll never convince everyone they should have custody if Jenny and I acted like brats. Mommy got mad and threw his dolls at him and told him that he needed to stop playing with dolls and making her be the man in the relationship.” He tells us, playing with his trains.

So we weren’t surprised when they showed up at Deb’s hand in hand for dinner. 

BRIAN

 When the came in they sat directly in front of me and Mel.

“Lindsay and I really think that Gus and Jenny would live a more normal life in our house.” Michael tells us.

“That's wonderful, I assume before that happens you and Lindsay will be able to pay the child support that so far I haven’t seen. I know right now you are just one payment each behind, but it adds up with each month it will take for this to get near a courtroom.” Mel tells him.

“With Brian providing support, you don’t need me to pay.” Lindsay tells her. 

“What Brian gifts to Mel for Gus, isn’t support, Lindsay. He'd have to have the rights of any father for it to be considered support. Even if what he gives to Mel was support, it doesn't change that you still owe your contribution to your son’s upbringing.” Ted tells her.

“Right now Michael and I don't have extra money to help out.” She tells him sadly.

“Then get a side job, it's how I raised Michael by myself. I ate peanut butter like it was steak, while making sure Michael had a good meal, because I didn’t have a Brian or Mel in my life.” Deb tells them.

“You both know that it’s not going to look good in court when Mel has to get your wages garnished because you're not taking care of the kids.” Carl tells them. 

“Don’t take this as us not wanting to see you two share Gus and Jenny with me, it’s just that I want you to have a fighting chance against me. It’s just not fun to watch as my lawyer will be able to throw out a few examples already of your less that adequate parenting.” Mel tells them.

“Brian, you know I only want the best for Gus.” Lindsay tells me.

“I know that you want us to think that, but I just don’t see it in your actions. To me, actions show you mean it. You showing up and taking Gus out, but not helping Mel support him, doesn’t give me the warm fuzzy feeling this Novotny-Peterson relationship has.” I tell them.

“Deb, you know that a child should be with his mother.” Lindsay tells her when I guess I didn’t give her what she wanted from me.

“I really believe that, but Mel is his mother too, so he is with his mother.” She tells her.

“Just for shits and giggles, how are you two planning to support Sammy’s babies?” I ask.

“Michael and I have decided that Michael will be the father to the twins.” Lindsay tells us.

“Which still leaves the question of how you plan to support the kids, because I’ve seen Michael’s books. The profit the shop is making barely covers his mortgage. Then there’s the issue of when you have the babies, how are you two planning to pay for that? I assume Lindsay’s insurance will be gone?” Ted tells them, looking to Mel.

“With us no longer being together, I couldn’t, in good conscience, keep you on my insurance.” Mel tells them.

“I need that in order to take care of my pregnancy.” Lindsay tells them. 

“You could always come to the free clinic for your appointments.” Justin says from the kitchen.

“I don’t want to sit in a room full of people who should have learned better than to get pregnant when they couldn’t afford a kid.” Lindsay tells him.

“Isn’t that what you did?” Justin asks.

“I… look we just wanted everyone to be happy for us.” Lindsay tells us.

“We are, I mean all my life I wanted Michael to be able to marry and have children. Now you and Michael have made that possible. In fact, Danny and I want to throw the wedding for you. I rented the GLC and Devina is willing to perform. Unfortunately Emmett is booked for next week so it will just be a potluck for the reception. I plan to call Ron and Nancy to see if they want to be there for the blessed event.” Deb tells them.

“We were going to wait until… ” Michael stutters.

“I want us to wait until the babies are born to have a wedding.” Lindsay adds, when Michael seems at a loss for words.

“I don’t want your children to carry the stigma that Michael feels is the reason his life was so horrible. Now, instead of just sitting here, let’s eat and plan the wedding.” Deb tells them.

“We’d love to, but I think we need to celebrate that you're happy for us.” Lindsay tells her, uncomfortably.

“Don’t worry Lindsay, I’ll be there to help you and Michael. I never thought my Michael could get it up for a girl.” Deb giggles.

“Lindsay we might as well eat while we’re here, maybe you’ll learn how to cook something edible.” Michael tells a not happy Lindsay.

“I just don’t see the point in cooking something when you seem to just shovel it in and swallow.” Lindsay tells him.

“I have to, since your cooking makes me miss the fucking tofu curry Ben use to force feed me.” He snarks at her.

“AWE, it’s like your first lover’s spat.” Emmett tells them. Which I think got them to see that the couple routine needed work.

“Michael, I made more than enough that you can take some home. I mean, we’ve all tasted Lindsay’s idea of food.” Deb tells them, smiling through the insult.

“Oh my God, Deb, what was this?” Emmett asks moaning as he puts it in his mouth.

“Justin gave me the recipe, it’s meat marinated and stir fried in rice. I wanted something Brian would actually eat.” She tells us.

“What the hell, you didn’t think it should be about us?” Michael tells her.

“Since we are dealing with you two next week, I wanted to try out something Brian might actually eat for a change. I want you to be as happy with Lindsay as Brian is with Justin. So sit down, shut up, and eat.” She tells him plunking the plate in front of Michael.

“What the hell is this?” Michael asks, panting and reaching for his glass.

“Oh, the meat is actually marinaded in lime juice, salt and red pepper before you cook it.” Deb tells him smiling at Michael’s red face.

“That’s my Deb, you’ll always be one spicy red hot mama.” Carl tells her, before leaning over and kissing her.