Once Daphne had gone home and I wolfed down half of the pizza that Mom ordered the two of us for dinner, I had just enough left in the tank to do my assignment for English Lit before passing out from sheer exhaustion.

I woke up the next morning feeling well rested, but I still felt like hot garbage emotionally. I had hoped that telling Daphne about my relationship with Brian would have made me feel better, as if getting the weight off of my shoulders would help, but it didn't. It wasn't as if telling her would help me get any closer to getting him back.

At least, that's what I had thought before getting in Daphne's car that morning to go to school.

"So, I was up half the night thinking about you and Mr. Kinney," Daphne said without so much as a good morning.

I groaned. "Gross... please don't picture me and him while you're in bed."

"No, not like that," she said, swatting her hand in the air. "I was thinking about how you are going to get him back."

"He doesn't want me back," I said sadly.

"You don't know that. For all you know, he's been absolutely sick over letting you go."

"Doubtful," I said with a scoff. "He probably spent the evening on Liberty Avenue getting his dick sucked by at least half a dozen different guys. Besides, I'm surprised that you would want me to get him back, since he is a teacher and our relationship is completely taboo."

Daphne acted as if she hadn't heard me. "Do you think he'll give you a ride home after Book Club today?"

I looked at her like she was nuts. "Yeah fucking right. It's probably against school policy for teachers to give rides to their students, and if it's against policy, Brian probably won't do it."

"What if you asked him nicely? I mean, it was really shitty of him to dump you, but I've always thought that Mr. Kinney was a nice man."

I laughed dryly. "Brian is not nice. You have no idea how big of a cold-blooded asshole he's capable of being, even when it's completely unwarranted."

We rode for a block in silence before I asked, "Daph?"

"Yeah?" she replied.

"We're okay, right? I mean, after the... thing yesterday?"

She reached over and patted my knee. "Yeah, we're fine."

"I'm sure you'll have much better luck with Glen Reeves, anyway."

"We'll see," she said as she pulled into the school parking lot.

We went our separate ways at the front hallway inside, bumping shoulders in solidarity before we parted.

I walked towards Brian's classroom for Creative Writing later that morning and found Daphne talking to Brian out in the hallway.

"Oh, hey Justin," Daphne said as if it were the first time she had seen me that day. "I was just telling Mr. Kinney how it's so unfortunate that you'll have to walk home in the cold after your Book Club meeting today."

I looked at Brian, who narrowed his eyes at me for a moment before looking back at Daphne.

"According to the weatherman, the wind chill is going to be below freezing all day," she informed me.

"The weatherman said that, did he?" I asked my mischievous best friend.

"Yes indeed," she confirmed. "And I remember you telling me how Mr. Kinney gave you a ride home from Book Club once before, so I took it upon myself to ask him if he wouldn't mind giving you a ride home this evening."

It was my turn to narrow my eyes. "You did, did you?"

"Yes indeed," Brian said.

Daphne continued, "I would come back here to pick you up myself, but I promised my mom that I would help her put our Christmas tree up this evening. Plus, I know that your mom is busy with organizing the Christmas parade and won't be able to pick you up, either. So what do you say, Mr. Kinney? You won't force Justin to freeze his tushy off while he walks home later, will you?"

The bell rang, signaling that class was to begin.

Brian smiled at Daphne, though it was obviously not genuine. "No, I wouldn't want Mr. Taylor to freeze his anything off."

"Then you'll take Justin home tonight?" Daphne asked, although she was looking directly at me with a big shit-eating grin on her face.

Exactly which home she was referring to, his or mine, was left in the air.

Brian fake-smiled at me, his face looking as if it were about to crack open. "Sure, I'd be happy to take him home tonight. Now, let's get to class, shall we?"

The three of us went into the classroom, and Daphne and I took our usual seats.

"I'm gonna kill you," I whispered to her as Brian did roll call.

She winked at me and whispered back, "You're welcome."

Brian did not call on me at all to answer any questions during class, which was unusual but not surprising given the current state of affairs. Our topic for the day was adjectives.

"Miss Chanders?" Brian called out.

"Yes, Mr. Kinney?" Daphne replied, her cheesy smile still glued on her face.

"Could you please give me another word for annoyed?"

"Um..." Daphne made a show of tapping her pen on her chin as she searched her mind. "Aggravated?"

"Aggravated," Brian repeated. "Good word. How about another synonym for annoyed?"

"Irate?" Daphne offered.

"Yes, irate is a good one, too," Brian said, his eyes sliding over to me. "Now, Miss Chanders, would you say that ‘annoyed,' ‘aggravated,' and ‘irate' are positive adjectives?"

Daphne shook her head. "No, they're all negative."

"Cantankerous," I said.

"What was that?" Brian asked, looking rather annoyed with me for speaking up without being given permission.

"Another synonym for annoyed,'' I explained. "Petulant... crotchety... grumpy..."

"Thank you very much, Mr. Thesaurus," Brian said.

I flashed him a fake smile of my own. "You're very welcome, sir."

Daphne snorted and coughed to cover it up. "Pardon me."

The rest of the class period passed without incident. The bell rang at the end and Brian stopped me before I could leave the room.

"Mr. Taylor, may I please speak with you?" he said.

Daphne looked at me slyly before she left to go to lunch. "See ya, Justin."

Brian waited for the rest of my classmates to depart before he closed the door, leaving the two of us alone.

He turned and snarled at me, "What the fuck did you tell her?"

I feigned ignorance and abhorrence for his colorful language, even placing a hand over my heart. "Whatever do you mean, Mr. Kinney?"

Brian suddenly grabbed me by the front of my blazer with both hands and shoved me into the wall.

"I mean, what the fuck did you tell Daphne about us?" he hissed into my ear.

Jesus Christ, was he ever sexier than when he was angry. I honestly had never felt more turned on by his show of masculinity and aggression. I knew that he had to feel my erection poking into his hip.

"I assure you, sir, that I have no idea what you are talking about," I said, injecting my voice with bogus fear for him, as if we were performing a scene. "Now, would you please release me?"

Ugh, he smelled so fucking good....

Brian held me in place for a few more seconds before complying with my request.

"Alright, you little shit," he said as he quickly smoothed my blazer with his hands. "If that's the way you want to play."

I slowly licked my lips. "Oh, I love to play, Mr. Kinney."

Brian let out a low growl deep in his chest before opening the door and waving his arm for me to proceed through. "I believe it's your lunch time, Mr. Taylor. It's beef and noodle day, if I'm not mistaken."

"Indeed, it is," I said as I passed by him.

"Don't push me, ‘cause I'm close to the edge," I sang out into the empty hallway, knowing that Brian could hear me. "I'm trying not to lose my head, ha-ha-ha-ha*."

I brought my tray of beef and noodles to our lunch table a bit later.

"What happened?" Daphne asked me anxiously.

I stabbed at my food and shoved my loaded fork into my mouth, ignoring her question.

"What did he say?" she prodded.

"What did who say about what?" September asked, forever feeling left out of my and Daphne's conversations.

Daphne took my cue of stuffing her mouth with beef and noodles to avoid answering.

I found Brian a minute later performing his cafeteria monitoring duty, his arms crossed over his chest and a scowl on his face. He looked absolutely petulant, crotchety, and grumpy.

Brian tried to ignore me later that day in English Lit, but I was like a fly in his ear. As he tried to make his way through the end of Act IV of Hamlet**, I repeatedly raised my hand with a question.

"Yes, Mr. Taylor?" he asked for the fourth or fifth time.

"Mr. Kinney, do you really think that Polonius was actually being eaten by worms or was Hamlet just being facetious?"

Brian sighed. "That's up to your own personal interpretation of what happens after we die, Mr. Taylor."

I raised my hand again.

"Yes?" Brian said, his voice heavy with the word of the day - annoyance.

"What do you think happens after we die, Mr. Kinney?" I asked.

He flashed me another one of his fake smiles. "I don't believe that is an appropriate topic for this particular setting. Now, may we continue with Hamlet, Mr. Taylor?"

"Yeah, Taylor, shut up already," I heard Hobbs grumble at the back of the room.

I looked back at Hobbs, flashing him a disapproving glare. He quickly sat back in his chair and snapped his mouth shut, remembering our little peace treaty.

I turned back and smiled at Brian. "Certainly, Mr. Kinney. I apologize to the class for being such a distraction," I said, intentionally emphasizing the last word of my sentence.

I left Brian alone for the rest of the class period, though he was obviously still perturbed - another synonym for annoyed - by our earlier exchanges. Once the bell rang at the end of class, I made sure that Brian hadn't forgotten about me.

"See you later for Book Club, Mr. Kinney," I called out as I made my way to the door.

He didn't even bother to fake a smile that time. "Uh-huh."

We were later discussing the first half of Lord of the Flies*** in Book Club. The discussion soon focused on how each of us thought we would do being stranded on a deserted island like the characters in the book had been.

One of the girls named Suzanne, who was known for being a big whore said, "As long as there was a cute guy there, I don't think it would be that bad."

Brian rolled in his lips. "What if that cute guy was unable to find food, shelter, or protect you from the wild animals around?"

Suzanne shrugged. "Eh, whatever. At least we would die together."

We all chuckled.

"What did it mean when the boys let the signal fire go out?" Brian asked us.

"At first," I began, "it was because the boys in charge of keeping the fire going were too irresponsible for the job, but it soon became apparent that some of them wanted to continue to live like savages on the island."

Brian almost looked disappointed that I was the first to speak up. "Was that because they lost hope of ever being rescued and just decided to make the best of it, or...?"

"They had adapted to their surroundings. The boys became what the island forced them to become and had to act like wild animals in order to survive. Some of them even thrived ... it was all very Freudian. Their minds became warped over time, almost similar to Stockholm Syndrome where a kidnapping victim starts to feel affection for their kidnapper as a way of coping with their situation."  

Brian's eyes were fixated on me, no doubt impressed with my brilliance before looking away and asking the group, "Have any of you ever felt that way before, where you had to become someone different than your normal self in order to fit in?"

Most of us answered in the affirmative, equating school with the island in the novel.

I thought about how much I had changed over the past few weeks since I had engrained myself into Brian's private life. I had become much more confident, brave, and proud of the man I was growing up to be, and I fucking loved it.

"Sometimes you have to act differently around certain people to fit in with them, maybe in ways that you never thought possible before," I said. "You may find, however, that you were never really acting at all... you were just becoming the person you really are."

Brian nodded slowly and licked his lips. "Alright everyone, I hope you enjoyed the first half of Lord of the Flies. Please read the next three chapters and we'll discuss them next Thursday."

The club members filtered out of the room, soon leaving me and Brian alone once again. The two of us silently gathered our belongings and put on our coats.

Once we were both ready, Brian announced, "It's time for me to take you home, Mr. Taylor."