JUSTIN

Brian was running late so I told him I would pick up Gus for him. I got to Mel and Lindsay’s to see Emmett sitting on the stairs. When I pulled in he didn’t move but waited for me reach the stairs. 

“I know you have no reason to talk to me and right now I’m hoping Mel keeps Lindsay from coming out here and kicking my ass, but I want a chance to maybe reintroduce ourselves.” He tells me.

“You know, I don’t see any reason we need to be friends. It’s okay not to like me, or even talk to me.” I tell him.

“It’s just, well I think that I need to find real friends.” He tells me.

“Or learn that sometimes you don’t trust someone without facts to base assumptions on.” I tell him, sitting down.

“It wasn’t you, it was me.” He tells me.

“Are we breaking up?” I ask, laughing.

“No, but I could see how that would sound like that. I look in the mirror and don’t like the person I see. Someone who could treat a person the way I treated you.” He tells me.

“I don’t know what to tell you, I’ve always tried to give people a chance first. Now it just seems like you’re apologizing just to do it.” I tell him.

“I’m hoping you’ll give me a second chance to show you I’m not the asshole you think I am.” He tells me.

“Then give me a reason to give it to you.” I tell him.

“How?” He asks.

“Don’t give Brian a reason to have to constantly defend me. I don’t want a relationship where I feel like he has to do that.” I tell him.

“I talked to my ex, Calvin, and he told me he didn’t want to try again.” He mentions.

“And you're telling me this for what reason?” I ask him.

“To tell you something he told me. He said that he couldn’t be in a relationship with someone who would let his friends treat someone like they weren’t good enough just because they came from a hick town in the middle of nowhere. Which is where I came from, so why am I allowed in Michael’s world when someone who came from the same place I did, was, as Michael put it, ‘not the kind of people we like’.” He tells me.

“What did you come up with?” I ask.

“Michael isn’t really anyone’s friend.” He tells me.

“I’m not asking you to hate Michael, or even to end your friendship. I’d like to know the person others seem to think you are, but we started in a bad place. Show me who you are, and we can decide from there.” I tell him.

“Jussin save me. Mommy wants to put the sailor hat on.” Gus runs out and jumps in my lap.

“I’ve always loved a man in uniform.” Emmett tells him, tickling him.

“So we’ve been told, since a certain football player.” Lindsay tells him, trying to put the hat on.

“Mommy, Daddy says not to ruin a style by too many accessories.” Gus tells her seriously.

BRIAN

I was packing up my desk for the weekend and signing off on the latest account boards, so that this weekend I didn’t need to be called. When I walked by Ted’s office he was staring at the screen as if it had some answers.

“Time to go home.” I tell him.

“What for, nothing’s there.” He tells me.

“What did you expect him to do Ted, put up with being harassed and suffer in silence?” I ask him.

“Did I really make him feel like Michael meant more?” He asked me.

“You should be asking him, not me.” I tell him.

“He’s not answering me.” Ted tells me.

“Then stop calling and go talk to him. He needs to see that he’s not going to be sitting alone waiting for you to remember he was there.” I tell him.

“You have one relationship and now you give advice?” He asks me.

“Ted, I flew to Orlando to prove I wasn’t just words to Justin. I spent the day at fucking Disney, which I wouldn’t have done normally, but I did it because I wanted to be with him.” I tell him.

“I’m just trying to wrap my mind around the idea of you in the Magic Kingdom.” He smirks.

“What I’m trying to point out is, that I made sure Justin didn’t doubt that I was serious.” I tell him.

“I haven’t given Blake any reason to trust me.” He tells me.

“Ask him how we became friends, but when you do, don’t making it sound like you're accusing him of something. When you hear the reason, you need to decide if you like the person who made him feel that way.” I tell him, leaving to meet up with Justin and Gus.

TED

I called Blake’s friend Alice to see if she could give me a clue to where Blake planned to be tonight. I didn’t even know where he’d been staying, which made me feel like an asshole for not checking that he was okay. I walked into the library and found him reading on a couch in the corner. 

“Hey, can we talk?” I ask him quietly.

“Michael busy tonight?” He asks, not looking up.

“I don’t know, I haven’t seen him since I tried to catch up to you the other day.” I tell him.

“I guess I must have run too fast for you to bother.” He tells me, still staring at his book.

“Blake, I didn’t go into Justin’s building because I didn’t want to force Justin to deal with me after the shit I did to him.” I tell him.

“I’m reading, so I don’t have the time to talk to you.” He tells me.

“Okay.” I tell him, and turn to the bookshelves and grab a book and sit down across from him.

“What are you doing?” He asks, looking at me.

“If this is the only way I can at least be near you, then I’ll sit here with you.” I tell him, opening the book.

“You're going to read about migration of birds?” He asks, looking at the book.

“Why not, it’s not like I care what it takes to be with you.” I tell him.

Blake returned to his book, but every once in awhile looked up to see me. It was better than telling me to go away, so I looked at the pictures when the words were making me want a nap. An hour later he put the book away and offered me his hand. I grabbed it and followed him out of the library.

“Ted, this doesn’t mean I’m saying yes to a relationship again. I miss touching you, but I don’t know if I can keep trying when we fail consistently.” He tells me. 

“What happened the last time we failed?” I ask him.

“I went to my old dealer.” He tells me.

“What stopped you?” I ask.

“Brian Kinney stopped me. He saw me talking to Reggie and yanked my ass out of Babylon. Took me to the loft and sat up the whole night telling me that no one was worth ruining everything I work for.” He tells me.

“You still didn’t say what happened, because up until I came home to find you gone, you seemed to be okay.” I tell him.

“I wasn’t, and the fact that you seem to think we were okay tells me that you ignored the fact that I was miserable.” He tells me.

“Don’t take this as me defending anything about Michael, but it couldn’t be all Michael.” I tell him.

“Ted, you told me once that you once wanted Michael, remember?” He asks me.

“Yes, but a lot of that had to do with being lonely and he was always around.” I tell him.

“If Michael had turned to you and said, ‘Brian is never going to love me, so Ted, let's make a go of it.’ How would you have reacted to it?” He asks me.

“I would have told him to fuck himself. I was never that desperate to be with someone, at least I hope not.” I tell him.

“Imagine what it was like for me to hear that at one time you loved Michael the way Michael loved Brian, then having to watch you chase after Michael whenever he called. I had to wonder if I was your consolation prize for not getting your fantasy man, the way Ben is for Michael. Only I’m not willing to use people like Justin to get you to pay attention to me.” He tells me.

“I’ve always worried that you would meet someone who would give you a more exciting life, someone younger.” I tell him.

“Ted, I wanted you, not excitement. I don’t mean you’re not exciting, but I don’t want someone who’s jumping out of planes. I want the guy who sits next to me while I’m watching trashy TV shows, even when he rather be sleeping.” He tells me.

“And ended up sleeping and drooling on you.” I tell him.

“It was that you tried.” He tells me.

“I want to succeed this time.” I tell him.

“I can’t move back in, I think we need to see if we can do this first.” He tells me.

“I can accept that, I can accept anything that isn’t no. Blake I promise…” 

“Show me, no promises yet.” He tells me, kissing me and hailing a cab.

“I would have given you a ride home.” I tell him.

“I know, but Alice still wants to rip your balls off, and I would like to use them again.” He tells me, getting in.

I got home, feeling less like my world was ending. My phone rang, when I saw it was Michael I sent it to voicemail. My world couldn’t include Michael if I was going to make this work with Blake.

BEN

I was staring at Michael as he called Ted, then Emmett, and Ted, then Brian. He was getting frustrated as no one was picking up. 

“Michael we can go do something with Eli and Monty.” I tell him, praying he’d quit ignoring me.

“I wanted to see if the guys were going to Babylon.” He tells me.

“I think they're pissed at us right now.” I tell him.

“I didn’t do anything they should be pissed at me for. They don’t like the truth, which is that they pick losers to date and then are surprised when the relationships fail.” He said, as if he was Brian. Then dials again.

“You made Blake and Calvin feel like they weren’t wanted around.” I tell him the truth.

“Why would Blake want Ted? I mean, he’s not good looking, and he’s boring when he talks. The only thing Ted has going for him is that he makes a lot of money working for Brian.” He tells me.

“Nice to hear what you really think about me.” Ted says, from the speaker on Michael’s phone.

“I thought I was calling Emmett.” Michael tells me.

“That makes it so much better, lose my number Michael.” Ted tells him, hanging up.