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Author's Chapter Notes:

As you know, any updates I give to this story will have to be done in increments. Each section is large and in charge, so I definitely have to split the time I'm able to update it based on my current writing schedule. 

I hope you enjoy this chapter. All mistakes are mine since it's unbetaed. Between me and Lorie, we'll get it sorted, should the need arise.

 

HAPPY READING and HUGS!

~Nichelle

IDGAF

You call me all friendly, telling me how much you miss me That’s funny, I guess you heard my songs

Well, I’m too busy for your business, Go find a girl who wants to listen

‘Cause if you think I was born yesterday, You have got me wrong

So I cut you off, I don’t need your love

‘Cause I already cried enough

I’ve been done

I’ve been movin’ on, since we said goodbye

I cut you off

I don’t need your love, so you can cry all you want

Your time is up, I’ll tell you why

You say you’re sorry, but it’s too late now

So save it, get gone, shut up

‘Cause if you think I care about you now, Well boy I don’t give a fuck

I remember that weekend, when my best friend caught you creepin’

You blamed it all on the alcohol

So I made my decision, ‘cause you made your bed now sleep in it

Play the victim, switch your position

I’m through, I’m done

So I cut you off…

I see you tryin’ to get to me, see you beggin’ on your knees

Boy I don’t give a fuck

Stop tryin’ to get to me, Tchh, get up off your knees

Boy I don’t give a fuck…

About you, No I don’t give a damn

You keep reminiscin’ on when you were my man

But I’m over you, Now you’re all in the past

You talk all that sweet talk, But I ain’t coming back

Songwriters: Clifford Harris/ Pharrell Williams/ Mike Posner/ Cornell “Nelly” Haynes

 

 

IDGAF lyrics © Jackie Frost Music Inc., Emi April Music Inc., Sony/atv Tunes Llc, More Water From Nazareth, North Greenway Productions, Sony/atv Allegro, Deyjah's Daddy Musik, Kmr Music Royalties Ii Scsp

 

BEFORE I LET GO: BOOK II: CHAPTER 10: IDGAF Part 1

MELANIE

As I alight from the plane I swear I can almost feel the peaceful environment wrap itself around me. Originally, when Alex, Barry, and I thought of this place, it was just so that I could have somewhere to grieve the end of my relationship with Lindsay in a private paradise. The only people who really knew the situation in its entirety were Brian and Justin, although Michael and Debbie sure had their say. It took everything in me not to scream the little twerp’s head off, since he introduced Lindsay and Harrison as some sort of revenge, regardless that he tried to make it seem innocent. I know for a fact that there isn’t an altruistic bone in Michael Novotny’s body, but I just couldn’t bring myself to argue about it just then. 

“You alright?” Diane asks, as she nudges me out of the walkway so the other passengers can disembark the plane as well.

“Yeah. Just thinking about the circumstances which caused me and a few friends to find this place is all.”

“Do you still miss her?” Diane asks me, as we make our way to the waiting golf cart.

I have to think about that for a moment before answering. “Sometimes, I do. But not Lindsay as a person, per se; just the idea of her.”

“The idea of her?”

“Yeah. You know what I mean... Not having someone to come home to, to share a life with, that’s what I miss about her. But other than those few moments, or more accurately, sentiments, no I don’t miss the constant work my relationship with her entailed.”

“But a relationship is constant work, Mel.”

“I know that, but with Lindsay it was a lot of unnecessary drama, too. She was always jealous, and resentful, of how much time I spent preparing cases beyond the standard office hours. I’ve always been a career dyke, so admittedly most of my focus and attention was on breaking the glass ceiling. I thought she understood that, or at least she said she did. But it was only okay until it interfered with her social climbing aspirations. We just had different ambitions; I understand that now. But then with the loss of Gus, and everything that happened during that time- work, jealousy, egotistical friends with ulterior motives and supposed family... it all just became too much.”

Diane nods. “I can understand the situation about your career, since it’s also a core reason why my relationships didn’t last. Of course, the last one was a closet case, but prior to that I was busy furthering my education and making sure that I knew everything about the business. I think the thing that showed me that my heart wasn’t truly into the relationships that ended was that when they called it quits, I felt bad for probably a minute before throwing myself into work again. Gramps said that was a surefire way to see what each of the women were made of.”

“Why would he say that?”

“Because when my Gram would feel like business was more important to Gramps, she made it a point to learn the business herself. Admittedly, not all women are like my Grams. She was a real go-getter, and not easily deterred from having all she wanted. But instead of being selfish for time, she created a window of opportunity for them to be together. And in turn, he learned to make time for it to be just the two of them, where nothing and no one else would intrude on their private time.”

“If I could find that…”

“I know. It’s why I won’t settle for a relationship again, Mel,” Diane told me. “To have witnessed how a true partnership worked, and then to settle for less would be doing myself and the person I’m with a disservice.”

I let her words sink in, and my thoughts immediately went to Brian and Justin. There were no parts in either of their lives that the other wasn’t involved in… at least not where business was concerned. I have to wonder if it’s the same way with their private lives as well. I know there were some secrets that each of them had that needed to be exposed; some lines and boundaries that should have been marched over long ago to keep them from feeling as if they had been shut out. I think that was the core of their issues, and heavily featured Michael in some major way. 

As we ride to my private villa, Diane breaks the silence by asking, “So how do you think the guys are really doing out here?” 

“I’m not exactly sure. I haven’t had a chance to speak with Alex and the others, beyond telling them that I was on my way here. We have a meeting later tonight though for them to bring me up to speed. I do know that the guys need to end their relationship with Michael as soon as possible though.”

Diane rolled her eyes at the mention of Michael’s name. “He’s so fucking toxic! I mean, how fucked in the head does one have to be to deliberately want your supposed friends to be completely unhappy?”

“Michael is one of those ‘If I can’t have them, no one else can either’ people. So to him, his actions are all to the greater good. Nevermind that Brian, Emmett, and Ted would all be miserable, and never want anything to do with him once they found out his role in all of this. To Michael, it would still have all been worth it, since they never have stayed pissed at him for very long. It’s all about control with Michael.”

“After seeing Debbie in action, I can sort of understand. He learned it all from her.”

I shake my head before responding. “Michael may have learned some things from her, but honestly, this is mostly his own personality showing. If truth be told, I would say she learned most of her bullying tactics from Michael.”

“I guess all that remains is to hear what the counselors have to say, and then take it all from there?”

“That’s right,” I agreed. “But I also need to take care of some other business concerning some of the staff on the island.”

“Why didn’t Alex and Barry take care of that?” Diane asks me, and I can’t help but smile at the question.

“Because they thought the firing of certain staff would be more effective if it came from JUDGE Melanie Marcus. I have to say, as plans go, this one will be not only most effective, but also most disconcerting. Ethan Gold is about to really understand what it means to stay the fuck out of Justin’s orbit, regardless of who tells him otherwise.”

“I’d hate to be him right about now.”

 

“Trust me when I tell you that he will, too.”

 

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