BRIAN

Seeing your children for the first time will always remind you that love can happen in a minute. When Sarah called to tell us that the doctor wanted to go ahead since the boys were full term, Justin and I grabbed Gus, Grandma, and Molly and flew in a day early.

Justin had been on the phone with Hunter most of the flight to clear his schedule a week earlier than planned. Something happened, because Justin stopped talking and was just listening. He hung up, rubbing his face and told me we could talk when no one was around. We went to be with Sarah to get her checked in and bring all the information the hospital needed, so the boys would be able to leave with us when they were released. Jen didn’t ask if we needed time alone, just took off with Gus and Molly.

Justin fell on the couch, and I waited for him to tell me what was wrong. I left Justin and Ted to set up the talent agency, only offering advice when Justin asked. Justin understood business and was there when I started Kinnetik, so he didn’t need me holding his hand.

“Don’t get pissed, and understand that I plan to tell him we won’t represent him.” Justin tells me.

“Who?”

“Ethan. I didn’t know about this, and you can thank Lindsay for explaining to Hunter not to give Ethan an appointment with her.” He tells me.

“It's business Justin. You only turn away clients who aren’t going to be a return on investment. Ethan makes money, it would be stupid to to let personal issues cause you to lose revenue.” I tell him.

“I promised you.” He tells me.

“This isn't breaking that promise, this is you understanding why you opened the talent agency. I know there is nothing Ethan could do to hurt us, because you told me that when you came back to me.” I tell him.

“He has an agent. Why come to Kinnetik, it doesn't make sense?” He asks me.

“He stayed with the agent that thinks being gay could hurt Ethan’s career.” I tell him.

“How do you know?” He asks.

“I wasn’t checking up on you or Ethan. A client invited me to see the symphony and Ethan was there. He saw me and we talked, about you, and how he hated that no one cared that you were gay. I told him I didn’t see why it mattered in his career either. He wasn’t a movie star where people wanted to believe only straight men should be allowed to play a straight character. His target audience is older and not interested in anything but the music.” I tell him.

“Why even talk to him?” Justin asks.

“All I could see was Craig telling you that in order to live in your home you had to hide who you are. I might not think highly of Ethan, but no one should be told they can't be themselves.” I tell him.

“I don’t want him around.” Justin tells me.

“Justin you're not going to be his agent, that's why you hired others. We got past that period and we're stronger, by no longer hiding the things we needed to say to each other. You making money off his career doesn’t break any of the promises we made to each other. If you don't see any advantages to taking him on as a client, then it makes sense to tell him no. I trust you, and us, and know he was just a footnote in our lives.” I tell him.

“Rachel would have all kinds of fun with Ethan.” He smirks.

“Than give Rachel her fun. We'll be busy chasing your spawn.” I tell him.

For me, Ethan wasn’t even worth the jealousy I felt. He was the result of too many disappointments Justin was living with. If Justin had stayed, I wouldn’t have seen the life Justin gave me, or how important he became to me. Justin doesn’t know about the men I hired and fucked, keeping their faces buried in a pillow so I could lie to myself. I used them in order to feel closer to him and threw money at them when they couldn't make me happy.

When I saw Ethan during the symphony, it didn’t even bother me he was there, because Justin never looked back or brought him up. We talked, and all I could see was another form of Craig in Ethan’s agent. So I told him what I really thought all those years ago, that he could've had it all if he stood up and fought for Justin. Like I did when Craig issued the ultimatum. Ethan’s career didn’t ramp up to the levels his agent promised, but he was being recognized for his music. Justin knows the right people, people that would make Ethan’s mediocre career into a high profile career. I'll never like Ethan, but it doesn't mean taking away an opportunity to see any gay man succeeding.

“Why did you never mention that you talked to him?” He asks the next day while we were waiting for our sons to be born.

“I forgot, and was more worried about you having the flu for a month.” I tell him.

“Excuse me, but is there a Justin and Brian here?” A nurse asks.

“That's us.” Justin jumps up and forgets everything, including me. “Sorry.” He whispers kissing me.

“We should be bringing the boys to the nursery in a couple minutes if you want to follow me and meet them.” She tells us, laughing at Justin.

When they were brought in and placed side by side, their heads turned towards each other, as if knowing where the other was. We brought Gus in with us. He was busy counting toes and making faces. I couldn’t stop seeing the parts of Justin in Brent and Jamie.

“Blond pain in the asses.” I whisper in Justin’s ear.

“They have a lot of hair. I thought babies came out bald? Jenny looked like an old man for a long time.” Gus tells us, having the nurses giggling.

I picked up Jamie first, when he protested being alone. He yawned then rooted around looking for food. Definitely his father's son. The nurses were all trying to help Justin when he picked up Brent. The twat still makes women fawn all over him. Me, they handed a bottle, and pointed to a chair. Well, until the male nurse walked in. Not that Justin cared about anything but sitting with Gus and Brent. He knew nothing came between us and snickered every time the man flirted.

“Brian, which one is which?” Justin asks when the other nurses took flirty to change a diaper.

“I have Jamie.” I tell him.

“How do you know?” He asked.

“Because Jamie likes to eat.” I tell him, with authority from all my time with the twins in my dreams.

MICHAEL

Everyone was excited the new babies were coming to join the family. We all went to Woody’s to raise a toast to our family expanding. Lindsay was sitting alone looking upset, and Hunter wouldn’t tell me what was wrong. Lately Lindsay was like a big bundle of happy, but it was like she deflated tonight. I sort of worried like I always do that she might be upset that Brian had a kid that wasn’t hers. I left the guys and sat with her, ready to tell her that she better get with the program and be happy for Brian and Justin.

“This is a celebration, in case you forgot.” I tell her.

“I’m happy.” She barely manages a smile.

“I can tell, please tell me this isn’t about Brian having kids without you.” I tell her.

“What?” She asks distracted.

“Is there something wrong with you and Mel?” I ask.

“No, it’s just something else. Fuck, it’s makes me wonder when I did anything right with Justin and Brian.” She blurts out rubbing her face.

“What did you do, try to go over Justin’s head by telling Brian something?” I ask, as Ted sits down with us.

“Lindsay, it’s not a big deal.” Ted tells her.

“I introduced them, then supported Justin.” She tells Ted, confusing me.

“Justin called me and said it wasn’t a problem if we offered to represent him.” Ted tells her.

“Brian would kill me and then Rachel if that happened.” Lindsay tells him.

“What happened?” I ask, trying to figure out why they are talking but not saying anything.

“Ethan wants to change agencies and called to make an appointment with Rachel.” Ted tells me. “And Lindsay, Brian doesn’t run the talent agency, Justin does, but to relieve you of your worry, Brian said it’s business and that’s what we all need to remember.” He tells both of us.

“Ethan is trying to worm his way back in Justin’s life, Ted.” I tell him.

“If he does, then we don’t represent him.” Lindsay tells us.

“Even if he was, which he isn’t, there is nothing Justin wants from Ethan. I’ve spoken to Ethan about why he wants us and it’s business to him too. Brian and Justin no longer have the problems that gave Ethan a way to break them up. It’s not like why Justin gave up… never mind. I think I’ll raise a toast with Blake.” Ted gets up, hurrying away.

I tried to get up because well, Ted sort of told Blake, who told Emmett and Ben, then of course Ben sort of mentioned it to me. Which means I know, and my mouth will get my ass in trouble.

“Sit down Michael, what did Justin give up?” Lindsay asks, pointing at a chair like Ma.

“Nothing, just something he wasn’t planning to do anyway.” I tell her, cursing, because like Emmett, Lindsay’s relentless when you don’t tell her what she wants to know.

“If it’s nothing then it shouldn’t be a big deal to tell me.” She tells me, waiting.

“He was offered a show before you came back and didn’t do it for a good reason. Can we leave it at that, and deal with the fact that my future has tofu and wheatgrass written all over it.” I prayed with all my might she’d let it go, but no, she had to stare the mom stare and I broke. “Justin found out Sam was coming back to Pittsburgh the same time you and Mel were finally moving back. He called in a favor and they offered the show to Sam instead when Justin promised to show later for them.” I blurted out.

“Why would Justin give up a show?” Lindsay asks.

“He wanted Gus home and didn’t want it to be a reason that you and Mel changed your minds. Do me a favor and don’t say anything about it. They would kill all of us for gossiping when Justin didn’t tell us we could talk about it.” I tell her.

“But don’t you see, now it’s our turn to keep Ethan from doing what Justin was afraid that Sam might do.” She tells me.

“I’ll help, but maybe this time we could actually keep a secret.” I tell her.

“Then don’t tell Ted, Emmett, Blake, Ben or you, you mean.” She says sweetly.