Groggily, Brian cracked open his eyes, blinded by sunlight peering inconsiderately through the blinds. He'd forgotten to close them last night before leaving for the club. He couldn't even remember how or what time they'd gotten in from the White party at Babylon but he remembered the single kiss which turned into a raging fire. It always had been and would always be that way with them- a claiming and reclaiming, possession and obsession; a resultant act of occupying the same space and time. He had never felt more worshiped than when Justin kissed him from head to toe or when he had returned the favor to the endless horny and satisfied sounds from his lover. Brian smiled at the memory as the pleasurable aches coursed through his arms and legs, a result from having the most insatiable man he'd ever known in his bed.

Brian shifted minutely, leaning over the shoulder of the man he loved beyond all reason. Justin's hair partially concealed his face, his full lips slightly parted; one hand cradled his face as the other clutched the pillow as he would a lifeline. He looks undeniably peaceful, beautiful even in sleep. Rolling over briefly, Brian rummaged through the bedside table looking for the small digital camera he kept there, an old habit from when the loft was robbed. Every time he bought something new, he took a picture of it in the unlikely event it would happen again. Settling himself as he was behind Justin but not to stir or wake Justin, he raised the camera high and right in front of the sleeping man's face hoping for the perfect angle. The first click caused Justin to shift a little but hadn't awaken him fully. The second and third didn't bother him at all. Few knew or understood his love of photography but the man in his arms did. It was another thing in a long list of Kinney-isms that only Justin Taylor had intimate knowledge of. Even though he didn't know everything about Brian, he knew more than most.

Justin stirred again, blindly feeling around for the hand gripping his waist. Brian moved it a little out of reach to his thigh but decided to let him catch it. Justin gripped it, eyes still closed and slid it up his thigh to his package settling it over Brian's hand. The small whimper which escaped him made Brian go from morning hard on to raging hard on. Unable to resist the temptation, Brian kissed the exposed shoulder before him, trailing his tongue up to the sensitive spot behind Justin's shell-like ear. He gained satisfaction when the Justin unconsciously pushed back against him. Brian continued his assault on Justin's slumber-addled senses; kept reaping the rewards of the subtle movements and sighs asking for more of the warring sensations. 

"You should really expand the business to giving personal wake-up service," Justin moaned, pushing his hair back. "HM...so much better than coffee."

"Well you're kind of a hard temptation to resist." Brian kissed the exposed nape of his neck, nipping gently at the sleep-warmed skin. "Do you really have to go to Rochester today?"

"Unfortunately, yes I do. I told Cynthia's friend I'd drive in today. Besides you have to go into the office, too," Justin rolled over to face him smiling into his hazel eyes. Not for the first time, Brian understood why Debbie had given Justin the name ‘Sunshine.' He was fucking picture perfect-eyes the color of a cloudless, cerulean blue sky, and a smile as bright. "Emmett and Drew told me you guys have a meeting today. You can' blow them off especially since you aren't going to New York indefinitely this time."

Brian reached up, pushing the long blond strands which momentarily shielded Justin's eyes. He always had an incurable fascination with it even when he'd cut it all off years ago during the Pink Posse days. It was soft as the finest silk and smelled of the lemon verbena shampoo he always used. "How long will you be gone this time?"

"I'll be back by Friday."

"Friday? Why so long?" Brian buried his nose into the stubble under Justin's chin, inhaling the scent that was uniquely his. It was just many of a thousand reasons he'd missed waking up next to him.

"Hmm," Justin moaned as he raised his head to allow full access to his throat. "Yeah. According to Miranda, there are some others who may be interested in my work and are friends of hers. You've heard of ReadMo Publishing?"

Brian nodded. "Yeah I've heard of them. Damn gutsy broads who have managed to compete with the top pub agencies in NYC even though they are remotely located and I hear they're expanding."

"Which is why I have to go to Rochester today." Justin finished with that superior smile Brian always found comical and adorable.

"Okay, okay you've made your point Mr. Business. I'm almost tempted to offer you a job to remove the competition."

Justin leaned in giving a quick lick to Brian's bottom lip. "You couldn't afford me."

"You're sure?" Brian deepened the kiss until it left them both breathless.

"What did you have in mind?"

"This..." And he proceeded to show him all the perks and advantages to having Brian Kinney as his boss.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

After five years of being stuck in a Federal prison in another state, former Police Chief Jim Stockwell was happy to be back in Pittsburgh. The trial itself was long and drawn out. It had taken five years from the time they indicted him for all the evidence to be collected. They began from the time he was a beat cop, questioned all his promotions-every single case he'd ever been involved in was brought before the committee and thoroughly examined. Unfortunately his high-priced attorney couldn't legally object to any of it because of his standing in the community. He was supposed to be a pillar of the community, not the criminal in question. It didn't help that Mayor Deekins wouldn't let any stone be left unturned. Something could be said for the good "upstanding" mayor, although Jim couldn't think of anything other than that he's a hypocrite who didn't understand his place within society's hierarchy. 

Although none of his peers wanted to convict him, they realized to not do so would result in chaos within the city and expose their own shortcomings and jeopardize their own standing within the community of "entitlement by birthright." So Stockwell became the sacrificial lamb since he was born on the wrong side of the tracks. He had been in touch with many of them who apologized for disassociating themselves with him during his botched campaign but they were still in support of him and his agenda...yada, yada, yada. They would have ample time to prove their loyalty to the cause after he settled some old scores. He lost his wife and kids; his career but most of all he lost his respect. And that could never be tolerated. 

Jim took a deep breath, allowing the familiar smell to fill his lungs. He'd always loved the city of his birth. He missed the sight and stench of the Susquehanna River. He missed having his pick of the best restaurants and his suits. Hell he even missed his barber but most of all he missed his sense of purpose. It was time he regained that and he knew exactly where to begin.

  *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Cynthia had never been more tempted to punch someone in the throat as she was looking at Michael Novotny. But in her position as Brian's assistant for more than fifteen years, she kept her features neutral as she responded to his inquiry. "No he isn't in yet, Michael and I'm not sure I know what time he will be. He has meetings all day. Why not just go by his place?"

"I went to the loft. He wasn't there."

My God. Can't he do anything other than whine? She had the immediate urge to laugh. Brian hadn't lived full-time at the loft for the better part of nine years but had neglected to tell his closest friend. In fact, Cynthia didn't think anyone outside of her and Emmett knew and she wasn't about to start divulging information just to set anyone's mind at ease- especially his. "You can always leave him a message, Michael. Other than that I don't know what to tell you. We have visitors regarding two of our major accounts in town and I know he'll be spending a great deal of time with them. It's the best that I can do."

She watched him debate with himself over what he'd been told and sent up a silent prayer that Brian would stay out of the office until she could handle him. Cynthia had been silent for many years about her feelings regarding Michael Charles Novotny but she wasn't about to remain that way. She stood still as he and certain other members of the group Brian called family took and abused his kindness repeatedly or blamed him for their misfortunes. She'd watched as they constantly meddled and interfered with his relationship with Justin.

She looked up at the painting hanging in the lobby of Kinnetik. The passion, love and optimism Justin displayed in it was evident in every line and brush stroke; the vivid colors reaching into the voyeur who looked upon it regardless of its intended subject. Cynthia remembered when Brian had ordered the painting removed from the loft to be hung in the lobby. When she had asked why not in his private office, she understood the blank stare he'd given her. It was too painful to be in such close proximity of the work without remembering the exact moment of its creation. Justin's work was always brilliant but even more so when things went right between he and Brian. 

"Okay, Cynthia," Michael said. "Will you tell him that I was by and to call me as soon as he's free. I've missed him and feel like we haven't been around each other since forever."

That's because you haven't been, asshole. "Sure, Michael," she answered noncommittally. If she had her way she'd never tell him but there was a good chance that he'd found out Justin was back and now felt the need to run interference. Some people were just so fucking transparent.

Watching him leave, Cynthia realized that if two of her favorite people (although she would always be more loyal to Brian) were going to have a real shot at finally getting it right, she needed reinforcements. She raced back to her office, closing the door behind her. Snatching her phone off the receiver, she punched in the code to the security desk advising them to make sure every time Michael Novotny came by the office she was notified and Brian was not in. Since Michael had decided to put the friendship which had meant so much to Brian at one point in their lives on ice, Brian should have the option to defrost it or not. She was tired of watching Brian be on the shelf until needed. The second phone call would take a lot more time and patience than what Job had when being afflicted and tested by the devil. The mental picture created by that thought sent a shiver up her spine which she promptly shook off. Dialing the number carefully since it was an international call, she tapped her foot in impatience for the phone to stop ringing.

"Hello."

"Hey Colby, climb out the pussy for a minute," she said by way of greeting causing a resultant laugh on the other end.

"You do know me well. What can I do you for, my beautiful cousin."

She smiled broadly. "How soon can you be on a plane?" 

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The drive to Rochester from Pittsburgh wasn't nearly as bad as Justin had anticipated. In retrospect the four-and-a-half hours it took was less tedious than having to endure a layover in Philadelphia since there weren't any direct flights into Rochester International. He parked his car on Route 104 and decided to grab a bite to eat at a restaurant Cynthia had recommended called Goode's. 

Bordering the Genessee River, the restaurant served as a diner, catering hall and a place where power lunches or romantic dinners could be held. Cynthia had said that the owner Paul, was Rochester's answer to Emmett Honeycutt which was kinda hard to believe. Emmett was one of a kind who could cook people happy. She'd also mentioned that she called ahead and told him to expect Justin. The view from the inside of the restaurant offered a pristine, unobstructed view of the river and Justin wished so badly that he had his brushes with him or that he'd thought to bring Brian's camera. Brian would have loved it.

The events of the past evening and the morning were puzzling to a degree and Justin had an awful lot to think about. He knew Brian had changed in a sense and it had nothing to do with age or their situation. He was always settled in himself and self-assured but for a man who didn't believe in caging Justin, he was a bit more possessive than he'd been previously. Almost like he was no longer afraid of the other "C" word...commitment. That was the problem with them as a couple. Justin smiled at that "C" word. A lot of those seemed to be applying to Brian and Justin lately. Perhaps their definitions had changed over the years which was entirely possible since they had both grown and lived more apart than together. One thing Justin was sure of was that he had at least a piece of Brian's heart whereas Brian owned his whole one. Could he just settle for the piece?

"Mr. Taylor. Your table is ready," the hostess called. 

Turning away from the magnificent view and his wayward thoughts, Justin followed her to the back of the restaurant. The view was still of the river but from a different angle and Justin found himself in awe once again. Unlike the view in the front of the building where there was a noticeable bend in the waterway, his new view allowed for nothing but water as far as the eye could see. The sun glistened off the gentle waves and Justin found himself once again wrapped up in its beauty. 

"Justin? Justin Taylor?"

He turned slowly toward the familiar voice in both shock and disbelief. What the fuck was Jason Dumas doing in New York...Rochester of all places? "Hello, Jason. It's been a long time." And if I had my way it would have been forever.

Jason Dumas was God's gift to a gay man if one liked that sort. Athletic, smart, tall, funny with a damn good cock and dick-sucking lips. Storm gray eyes, wavy black hair and a smile that screamed ‘bend over.' They had met on Justin's last night in Hollywood while he was doing a last run of the club scene before boarding the flight back to Pittsburgh the next morning. At the time, Jason was there to interview with one of the top real estate agencies on the west coast. They became fast friends, had a one-night stand and Justin boarded his flight and never looked back. A few years after Justin relocated to New York, they ran into each other at one of Justin's art shows in an NYC gallery. Although Jason wanted to resume things, it wasn't possible as he had a date and Justin didn't believe in getting in the way of a relationship although Jason was a tempting piece as he always was. He'd had too much of that with the Brian/Mikey show. The last time they met Justin was involved with Frederique who wasn't into open relationships- another detour from what Justin was accustomed to. That was the last time he and Jason saw each other. Justin later admitted that the only reason he was thoroughly attracted to Jason was because of his similarity to Brian Kinney.  

"Yeah it has. What are you doing in my town? Tired of L.A. already?" He took a seat without waiting for an invitation.

"Business. As far as L.A. goes, I missed home."

Jason nodded. "I can understand that which is why I came back here. By the way, I heard your shows have been doing really well. The Toronto showing sold out so congratulations are in order."

"Thanks." 

The silence was a bit telling. Jason of course was completely comfortable whereas Justin wasn't sure what the hell was going on with him. The only time Justin experienced visceral reactions was within close proximity to Brian which was impossible. Maybe what Brian said was true about him...that he was attracted to power. Looking back over most of his interactions, Justin thought some truth could be applied to the theory especially considering the very real attraction he felt looking at the man in the Boss suit across from him.

"Have you met Paul yet?" Jason asked smiling. 

"No. Not yet. My boyfriend's assistant set the reservation for me. After that I have a meeting to get to." Justin was glad he'd decided to change into his suit an hour ago at the rest stop along Interstate 490. He knew the navy blue Ralph Lauren was perfect as opposed to looking like a high school kid on his first job interview. 

"Boyfriend, huh?" Jason asked with a sardonic smirk. "Anyone I know."

Justin laughed. "I doubt it even though considering how much you fuck that might be impossible."

Jason returned the laughter. "Yeah well it's better than becoming a mass murderer, right?" Jason took a peek at his watch. "Tell you what. I know you're going to be in town for a few days, how about we have dinner tonight and then I'll show you my city. There's not much to see but plenty of bars to hop. Sound good?"

Truthfully, Justin would have declined the offer and just gone to bed. Between reconnecting with Brian and the constant travel of the leading up to visiting the Pitts, he was tired as hell. But it was nice of Jason to show him the town since he would be designing logos and getting a feel for the environment was definitely a plus. "Okay, I'll meet you back here. What time is good for you?"

Jason flashed that million-dollar-smile many men (and women) lauded him for and Justin felt a little flip in the pit of his stomach. "How's five-thirty?"

"Great," Justin answered. The sooner I get this over with, the sooner I can get some fucking sleep. Brian wore me out. "Should I make the reservation on my way out or will you take care of it."

"No need for either," Jason said rising from the table. "Hey Paul."

"You're hitting on my guest already, Jason? Have you no fucking decency? The man just got into town and he's here on business. I swear your dick is always twitching."

Jason laughed loudly. "Calm down, dude. Justin and I are old friends and for the record you already know how I feel about decency- it's a fucking waste of time. As far as my dick goes, I would offer to show it to you if LaShawn wouldn't kick my ass."

"You're damn right his pretty ass will kick yours. Now take your ass to work and ask Monique if she wants me to send lunch over to her."

Justin sat there listening in awe. They really did sound like Emmett and Brian. "Monique McRae?"
Paul answered, "Yeah. You know her?"

Justin shook his head. "Not yet but I have a meeting with her on Wednesday, I think. I have to double check with my assistant but I'm meeting with Miranda Miller later today."

"Well then you'll probably get to meet LaShawn today as well," Paul said. "They're business partners."

"And a prettier motherfucker you'll never meet," Jason added. "That's why we call him ‘Shine'. I really think we should have ‘Sexy M.F.' t-shirts made up."

"You know what Jason....if I didn't love Jeremiah so much, I would throw your ass in the oven and cook you," Paul said laughing.

Justin laughed too. He'd often thought that Jason would land himself in a heap of trouble one day. "Who's Jeremiah?"

"I thought you said he was an old friend, Jason."

"He is but he doesn't know about Jer. Jeremiah is my twin brother, Justin," Jason said smiling at the look of shock on Justin's face.

"Holy shit, there are fucking two of you? Identical?"

"Yeah only difference is that his eyes are blue and he's a professor at the local college. Hey I'll bring him with me tonight, okay?"

"Sure. After knowing you, this is definitely something I have to see." Justin said disbelievingly and shaking his head. That was like Brian Kinney having a twin. Justin suppressed the urge to shiver.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Daphne was exhausted, not just physically emotionally. On an ordinary day, being a trauma specialist wasn't easy. But then there were the days when, she wished she could hide, crawl under a rock, sleep or die- it didn't matter. She'd just saved Drew Boyd's ex-wife, Ciara and her unborn child which she felt good about. That would have been devastating for Drew even though he was with Emmett. By all accounts they were still friends even though they had moved on with their lives after Drew came out ten years ago. That wasn't what had Daphne upset although the car pile-up was not easy to deal with. After she finished the surgery for Ciara and it was time to talk to the family to let them know she would live and so would the child. 
"Hey Jan is the family here for Ciara Marshall?"

"Yes, Dr. Chanders. The family is here but there's something you should know," Jan answered Daphne.

"What is there more information that wasn't included in the chart?" Daphne grabbed it and began scanning through it making sure she hadn't missed any pertinent details.

"Not exactly but-"

"Daphne! How's Ciara?" Dr. Steve Marshall came up behind her, eyes wide and frantic.

"Honey she's fine. I was just about to call for her husband. Obviously you would know who he is so can you point me to him?" 

The nurses station instantly got quiet. Daphne noticed a few sharp intakes of breath and  a sense of foreboding settled into her stomach as she looked at Steve who would not make eye contact with her. Daphne couldn't believe how guilty he looked before he actually said the words.
"You're looking at him, Daph."

"You son-of-a-bitch," Daphne growled low at him. "In fucking five years it never occurred to you to tell me you were married?" Realizing they had an audience, Daphne pulled on the cloak of her professionalism and delivered a complete list of issues, concerns, the prognosis and the surgical procedures performed. "If there is anything else you need to know, you should ask Dr. Blake. Other than that I have nothing else to say to you now or ever."

"Wait, Daphne. I don't want Dr. Blake. I would rather you take care of her. I trust you."

"What you want is no longer a factor in what I choose to do. Professionally, I'm handing your case over to Dr. Blake because I have a conflict of interest now. Personally my view of the situation and what you want is that you can go fuck yourself with a giant syphilis-infected dick and that's as far I can go right now."

With those parting words, Daphne found Dr. Blake in the break room and advised him that she had a personal stake in the patient's health and although she did her duty as the trauma specialist on duty, she could no longer continue with the case. Changing from her scrubs, she showered quickly in the Doctor's lounge and redressed in her t-shirt and yoga pants-suitable for the over-warm September night- and left the hospital. Only then did she allow her tears to fall. 

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*   

"Thanks for agreeing to see me on such short notice, Craig."

Craig Taylor poured himself a scotch and a glass of water from the bar area in the living room of his home. "No problem, Jim. I had heard you would be home any day. Where are you staying?"

He accepted the glass of water gratefully. It had been forever since he'd had bottled water. "I'm staying with the Hobbs family for right now. After my trial, my ex-wife cleared out the joint account, sold the house and moved. I don't know where she and the boys are now. Thank God, I had the forethought to set up an injured reserve so I wouldn't be completely broke when I came out. Which brings me to my reason for wanting to see you."

"Oh?" Craig sat up straighter still nursing his drink. "How can I help you?"

"I need to know everything you know about your son and his partner."

"The only son I have is my youngest."

"You still don't acknowledge the other?" Jim took another sip of water.

"As far as I'm concerned, he's dead to me. I wish him nothing but the best in his life but he's no longer a factor in mine. As far as his partner is concerned: I heard they parted ways ten years ago but Brian Kinney is still a big, fat fucking success. In fact, his firm is the most successful in the eastern part of the country and is still growing constantly. They've just moved over into international territory. His power base has expanded greatly within the last five years alone."

Stockwell sat silently, absorbing all he heard and what Craig Taylor hadn't said."You're remarkably well-informed, Craig."

Craig laughed. "I still do business with Vanguard so it pays to pay attention." Craig sipped his scotch again. "But you still haven't told me what you have in mind.""I'm not sure yet but when the time comes I need to know whether you're in or out."

"Tell you what, Jim, there's nothing I would like than to pay Kinney back for costing me my family. Everything was fine before he came along. So you let me know what you have in mind and I'll let you know what I can contribute to it. Fair?"

Jim nodded. "That's fair. I'll be in touch."

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Brian, Melanie's on line one but I think I know the reason she's calling."

Brian was knee deep in storyboards for the latest Kinnetik campaign which just happened to be Emmett's. Between his clothing line and the new campaign for his catering service which is constantly expanding, Brian wasn't sure if he'd have the patience of Job to deal with yet another domestic partner dispute between the mother of his child and the woman who thought she was everyone's mother, including Lindsey's. "I don't feel like dealing with ‘Smelly Mellie' today, Cynthia. Can you just take a message?"

"Yeah, I can although-"

"Although?" Brian looked hard at Cynthia but she wasn't intimidated. He let a small smile form on his lips as he realized she never was even when he roared his demands. She would just stand there looking as calm as ever until he came back to himself. He sighed deeply realizing that until she spoke her piece she wasn't going to do what he needed. "What is the actual problem this time, Cyn?"

She smiled at him then understanding that the same way she was capable of reading him, he was able to read her determination as well. Theirs was a rare employer/employee relationship but then that was to be expected after so many years. "I'll get rid of Melanie although I think she's calling because of your visitors in the lobby. Ted needs the go ahead to send O'toole's account to collections- even though he knows you'll approve it, he wants the memo anyway for legal. Then there is the deadline for the art department and what you want done for Em's company." She finished with a small smile on her lips at the stunned look on his face. "Oh and you have a meeting in an hour with the new head of security for Kinnetik. I'll have Tony meet you for the introductions."

Brian nodded finally being able to process all the information Cynthia shoved into his brain. How the fuck did she keep up with all that without a PDA? "Who's in the lobby? I didn't have another appointment this afternoon before security, did I?"

"Nope," she answered smiling. "This was a complete surprise and yes I know how much you hate them but humor your guests anyway will you?"Brian sighed deeply again. He was missing Justin already but it was business as usual for both of them. He briefly remembered the kiss they shared before Brian left the house. He knew if he didn't leave then that both of them would have still been holed up in the house, fucking multiple times in every room. Brian was instantly grateful he was behind his desk and could adjust himself without Cynthia noticing. "Show them in, Cyn and it better be worth it."

She chuckled softly. She noticed where Brian's thoughts took him and of whom he'd been thinking of at that moment. It was the same way with Justin. Brian's eyes would always take on a subtle, dream-like quality although the rest of his handsome face would stay stoic in comparison. It was something no one would ever notice unless they knew Brian Kinney well and Cynthia knew him very well. She left the office returning with Gus and Lindsey.

"Dad!" Gus threw himself into his dad who had by then stood up from behind the desk. It was amazing to see the two of them together-identical except for the eye color. Gus looked exactly as his father had at fifteen-beautiful. Same hair cut, same nose, same skin tone and angular chin. He smiled at Brian and Cynthia's breath caught in her throat. Lindsey did the same thing. Watching Gus grow up, they all knew he would grow to look like Brian but they had not anticipated how much. The only differences was that Gus' voice was in the middle of changing and sometimes it causes a little squeak which Lindsey found adorable and that he was still a little shorter than his dad.

 "Sonny-boy! What are you guys doing here? I'm fairly certain I know since your wife has been calling my phone all damn day but I want to hear it from you."

"I'll leave you alone to have your visit," Cynthia said and was backing out of the room when Lindsey stopped her.

"If it's all the same to you, I would really like you to stay," Lindsey said quietly and Cynthia could feel the slight tremor in the hand that held onto her arm.

"Sure, Lindsey. I guess it would be better than trying to remind Brian of what he was supposed to tell me later anyway."

That earned a watery chuckle from Lindsey as Cynthia led her over to the plush cream colored sofa near the conference room of the massive office. 

"Lindsey are you sure you want to discuss this now with Gus here. I mean there's always later when-" Brian let his words trail off at the faint shake of her head."He knows everything, Brian and may even be able to fill in the blanks for you that I am unwilling or unable to."

"Okay, so what's going on? And why is Melanie calling my office phone every sixteen minutes?"

"I don't give a fuck if she calls every three second, Brian, I'm not going back-to Toronto or to her," Lindsey said more forcefully than either of them had ever heard her. Lindsey's WASP upbringing frowned upon high emotions and foul language.

Brian and Cynthia exchanged meaningful looks as Gus rushed over to sit with Lindsey, throwing an arm around her stiff shoulders. She literally vibrated with anger. 

"Alright, Lindsey, you don't have to go back. You're a grown woman so the decision is completely yours." Brian crossed his arms over the front of his chest, his ankles one over the other and made him self reasonably comfortable on the front of his desk. "Now what could have happened in a year's time that has you ready to throw twenty years of your life out the fucking window?"

He stood there almost afraid to move-to breathe for fear that Lindsey wouldn't tell him. She was one of his oldest and dearest friends. The subtle graying at her temples which had not been there when he and Justin arrived at her doorstep a year ago and spent two weeks in their home didn't add up to the frayed woman who sat before him. Every couple had their share of problems...Justin and his non-relationship proved that fundamental truth if nothing else. But he also knew that two people had to be willing to work at it, to move together towards a common goal and if one party wasn't willing then it went to shit. He folded his lips to prevent the smile forming remembering when Justin had said those words to him ten years ago right before the bombing during one of their break-ups. It was a lesson which stuck and he could see the wisdom in his young lovers words that he couldn't see then.

"I just can't endure any more, Brian. Can you understand that? Melanie," she sighed deeply. "Melanie is never satisfied. She wants all of my time and attention and if she doesn't get it she feel slighted. She makes a difference between the children because-"

"Because I'm Gus' father," he supplied wishing it was a different argument but used to constantly being the focus of disagreements between the munchers even when he had absolutely nothing to do with their situation.

"Yes," she confirmed. "You know as well as I do what she really wanted but I wouldn't give her that decision as I had so many others. That's what it's been like you know. Compromise is just me sitting idly and agreeing with her in order to keep the fucking peace. Well not anymore. I want a divorce."

"I'm sorry but you didn't marry me," Brian joked which actually brought a smile to Lindsey's lips and caused Gus' shoulders to relax a little. There was more to the story which he would dig up eventually but first he needed to calm Lindz down and make sure she understood what she wanted. "Lindsey are you sure? You two could work it out, you always do. Justin and I used to joke that if you two couldn't make it no one could."

Lindsey shook her head emphatically. "I used to think so too, Brian but Melanie has gone too far this time. And I am no longer in the mood to be complacent in my own life. I should have listened to you a long time ago about standing up for myself."

Brian strolled across the office and sat next to Lindsey who had begun to cry softly. "What the fuck do I know.I've never been in a relationship so I'm not an expert."

"Never, Dad? What about Justin?" Gus asked ingeniously causing both Lindsey and Cynthia to snicker.

"Sonny boy, I'll explain Justin and my situation-ship when you're older," he said laughingly. Leave it to his brilliant son to bring up the crux of the matter between him and his lover. "I want you to take some time and think carefully about what you want to do, Lindz. Divorces are not only expensive but do a helluva lot of damage to both individuals which can't be undone. But first things first. Where are you staying?"

"I already took our stuff to the house, Dad."

Brian's eyes widened briefly. Well this is one conversation I hadn't planned on having with Justin so soon. "Okay, not a problem. You put your things in the far wing?" Gus had been trying to find out what was in that wing of the house since he'd first visited.

"Gus thought a minute and Brian's blood pressure spiked immediately. "No I put our stuff in the west wing. I can't remember why I wasn't allowed in the east wing of the house but I didn't go there."

Brian let out the interminable breath he was holding and Cynthia couldn't stop the cackle that came out. As she tried to regain her composure he spoke to Gus, "Good job, Sonny Boy and remember that that section of the house is completely off limits." At Lindsey's puzzled look he shrugged. "Another one of those conversations that will happen when he's older."

Lindsey looked at Cynthia who very slightly nodded her head causing Lindsey to burst out in her customary high-pitch laughter. Brian and Gus couldn't help but smile at her, each inwardly feeling like a king for restoring the Lindsey they knew and loved even if it was just for a little while.  

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Emmett you have to calm down," Drew said patiently.

"I don't have to do anything."

"Fine don't." Drew shrugged his broad shoulders. The truth was he agreed wholeheartedly with Emmett about Michael and the situation regarding Justin and Brian. Lord knew the two of them had endured so much at the hands of others but it wasn't Emmett's business. It was up to the two of them to set things right and until they did, there was only so much the rest of them could do.

"Am I supposed to sit here and watch while he destroys Brian's chance to be as happy as we are, Drewsie?"

"That's exactly what you're going to have to do, Em honey." Drew took a deep breath. "Oh I know it's tough and it's only going to get more difficult watching the plays from the sidelines but you can only show them what to do. You can't make them take your advice or make their decisions to fight for what they deserve. Those actions have to be Brian and Justin's and no matter how much you root in the stands for them to make it, they'll never score the touchdown if they choose not to run the play."

Emmett smiled wide. "I love it when you put life's situations in football analogies."

"You do?" Drew grabbed him around the waist, pulling Emmett into the warm shelter of his body.

"I find it incredibly sexy, Drewsie."

"You do, huh?" He leaned in for a kiss, deepening it when Em's full lips parted slightly. Kissing Emmett was one of the greatest joys of his life; fucking Emmett was the other. "How about you play center for me and let me ream your tight end." He smiled at the quick intake of breath from the love of his life.

They stood in the middle of the house Drew bought them five years ago. Floor-to-ceiling bay windows overlooking the mountains and overlooking  a small section of the Susquehanna River. It was peaceful and everything Emmett could have dreamed of. Brian and Justin-especially Brian deserved happiness after the shitty life he lead early on. After many years, Brian had confided in Emmett and he had kept Brian's secrets. All of them. Perhaps that was why Emmett could not just watch from the sidelines while people deliberately set out to hurt the one man who had always accepted him without question and coached him through the difficulty of Ted's addiction. He owed Brian Kinney so much but he would deal that later. 

"Should I run upstairs, Drewsie, where you can throw your balls at me or will right here do?"

He let out a loud whoop as Drew put Emmett over his shoulder and carried him up the stairs where they would go indulge in the superbowl of sex for the remainder of the afternoon.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Michael felt a little funny going into the diner after the argument he'd had with Emmett about Brian and Justin but it couldn't be helped. He needed advice and help and the one person who he could always count on was Debbie. It wasn't that he didn't want Brian happy. It was that Justin was the source of so much unhappiness for Brian and that could not happen again. So even if Brian would hate him for it later on, Michael could live with that as long as he saved him from the blond clutches of Justin Taylor again. 

 "Hey, Ma."

"Hi, Honey," Debbie said, giving him a hug in the process. She felt him up as she always did when he'd been gone for an extended amount of time. "What the fuck. You feel like skin and bones."

Michael laughed. It was always the same and it was comforting to know she would never change. "I've just been eating a lot healthier these days."

"Uh-huh," she murmured noncommittally. "Geno, stack of jacks, two eggs and a side of bacon for the prodigal son, here." She grabbed the coffee pot and settled him into the same booth within the Liberty Diner she always did when he was a kid. "So honey, how have you been? How was...where were you guys this time?"

"London. We went to London, Ma."

"So how was it? Did you guys meet the Queen? God, I just love her. And how's Hunter?"

Michael smiled at her. She always rattled off questions. "London was great. I got to attend the Comic-Con there and Ben met a lot of great authors based there. There's a writers convention happening there soon and I think Ben may try to go back for it. Unfortunately, we didn't meet the Queen but we did do the palace tour which was wonderful. You can't even imagine how amazing that was. We did hear from Hunter. All A's and a B for the summer session. He's trying to graduate a year early. He said he'll be back home for the holidays."

"That's good, honey. So what brings you by?"

"What? I can't come see my own mother?"

"Uh-huh," Debbie said again and sat staring at him as he tore into his food. "I'm prepared to sit here until you tell me what the real reason is that you're here just after the others would have been in here and gone off to work by now. Anything I should know about?"

Michael took a sip of coffee trying to formulate his thoughts. He certainly didn't want to offend her the way he'd clearly offended Emmett. But if he was going to know what to do to prevent Brian from repeating mistakes and making the biggest mistake of his life, he had no choice but to forge ahead. "Why is Justin Taylor back in Pittsburgh."

Debbie's smile had not shifted out of place at all. She couldn't possibly approve, could she? "Why are you asking me that? Shouldn't you be asking Brian?"

"I tried but Cynthia said that they had quite a few new accounts and he would be in and out of the office over the course of the next few weeks. I asked Emmett who told me to mind my own business but you know Emmett. I haven't spoken to Ted yet. When I went over to Kinnetik it was literally in an uproar so I know he must have been crunching numbers somewhere in there. So are you gonna tell me?"

He watched Debbie ingest all he had to say as she refilled her coffee. When she spoke he could tell she was choosing her words with care-something his mother never did, at least not with him. "I think you should ask Brian why he asked Justin to come back to Pittsburgh for a time. As for the rest and whatever his answer may be when you ask him, I think you should mind your own business. You and Ben have a beautiful life and family; Brian and Justin deserve to have the same."

"Wait. You said he was back for a time. That means it's not permanent right?"

"Again, Michael whatever you want to know, you should ask Brian. However, what I will say is that you really don't have a right to know since you ended the Brian and Mikey show a long time ago. You've moved on with your life and are living the type of life you want to lead, honey. Let Brian Kinney find his way as you have yours." Debbie heard a high-pitched ding just as she finished refilling Michael's coffee. "Hey lay off that fucking bell. This isn't a prize fight unless you want two black eyes. I'll be right back."

Michael watched her shuffle off to pick up the order for the couple in the far corner of the diner. His mind flashed back through all the laughs they had within their gathering place of many years. Emmett, Ted, Brian and Michael gathered and laughed, talked about the basic things in the lives of almost thirty year olds. Even Melanie and Lindsey would drop in from time to time to complete the circle of friends-their family. All that changed after Brian Kinney met Justin Taylor and although they had managed to have some good times even with the twink around, things were never the same. Michael missed the closeness and camaraderie they shared in their quest for fun, friendship and fulfillment and he was determined to get that back by any means necessary.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I would tell you that I love you tonight

But I know that I've got time on my side

Where you going?

Why you leaving so soon?

Is there some place that's better for you?

What is love, if you're not here with me;

What is love if it's not guaranteed?

What is love if it's just obsolete?

What is love if you're not here no more

What is love if you're not really sure?*

After several days of being in Rochester, Justin was glad to be going home. Home. Home where exactly? On the one hand, he missed his home in New York but he hadn't realized how much he missed waking up to Brian until he'd returned to his arms. Arms that felt like home, kisses that heated his skin and made him ready for sex faster than a microwave popped popcorn. If it had just been about the sex, Justin could have handled that. But it was more-so much more than what he thought it would be or could be and that was the problem.

On the night he had returned from his apartment and after he and Brian had the long time christening of his office; after they arrived home and Justin fucked Brian to sleep, he took a walk through the house. The house named Britin, that was both of theirs and was supposed to be a wedding present although that never happened. Everything in the house spoke of them though at the time he hadn't realized how much. Justin made his way up to the third level, mentally taking note of which steps creaked in protest under his weight. He slid his hand along the polished wood paneling constantly for the light switch. The faint scent of orange assailed his nostrils indicating the wood was newly polished, evidence glistening on his fingertips when he pulled back his hand after he found the switch. The room was instantly and magnificently bathed in the brightest light imaginable next to natural sunlight. Justin caught his breath at the visions before him. All of his basic pieces from when he first started out in the city as an artist limned the walls. The sketch he'd done for the Gay and Lesbian Center of Brian naked and sleeping stared back at him. He grabbed his chest not knowing how to process the information that Brian had believed in his talent so much, he had bought the ones which told their story.

Walking hauntingly to the room in the far corner, Justin pushed open the door and again the breath left him as he gazed upon more work he'd done which cataloged their time together, including the one of two portraits he'd done of the last time they made love before he had to catch his plane and reluctantly begin his new life. It was a painting awashed in shadows, rich midnight blue sheets and the matching duvet. Brian knelt over him as one leg rested over his shoulder, the other draped across is strong forearm. Sweat dripped from his forehead falling onto his broad chest making Brian seem as if he was glistening while moving smoothly into Justin. It had been a struggle to keep his eyes open but Justin hadn't wanted to miss a single moment as the man he loved labored over him for what could have possibly been the last time. Looking upon the portrait, Justin heard the gaspy moans which had escaped his lover and his own answering groan in response to the rightness of their fit; the bittersweetness of the moment. In Brian's eyes was Justin's body and a depth of unspeakable emotion-- things Brian would never say. Justin's hand rested over Brian's heart as the culmination of their relationship had been summed up in one unforgettable moment and captured on canvas for eternity. He had titled it Until Then as an acknowledgment of Brian's comment just before they joined one last time in the place where it all began. 

Justin closed his eyes in remembrance as he heard footsteps making their way to the kitchen. What possessed him to stay at Jason's for the week he would never understand but it did save him the hotel fee. He almost laughed aloud at the memory of Brian's reaction to Justin penchant for clipping coupons. "I had no idea you were so tight," Brian said. Justin responded, "Sure you did." They had a lot of great, comical moments but was the promise of more worth the risk of autonomy?

"Good morning, Justin. How'd you sleep?"

Justin shook himself out of his revere. "The bed was a fucking wonder. I'll have to get one for the nights I fall asleep in the studio."

Jason smiled in response. "So you were telling me about the Brian/ Justin saga. Where do you guys stand now?"

"I really don't know," Justin answered honestly. "There's still that has to be talked about and decided. Nothing that will happen fast or overnight and that's the part that sucks the most I guess."

Jason nodded. "The good thing is that money- or lack of it- is no longer the issue. So what's really holding you back, man?"

Justin shrugged not wanting to examine all of the issues just then. "Let's just say that we both had a lot of growing up to do and I don't know if I've grown enough. He never wanted to wrap me up before and I suppose he still doesn't. He always believed that I should be free to soar. The question is how do I want to do that. Do I think I can fly with him or is it better to save the heartache and fly away from him now?"

"Well little bird, sounds like you have some major thinking to do. Mind if I give you some advice?" Justin shook his head and Jason took a deep breath. He could well understand Justin's obsession with Brian but in turn he could understand what Brian must feel waking up to such beauty every morning. The disheveled blond locks that screamed to be pulled gently or yanked hard, the clear and intelligent blue eyes which could go hard in anger or soft in passion in the blink of an eye, and the soft, sensual full lips. Brian was a lucky man to have his ‘Sunshine' all the time. Maybe he needed a reminder of how fucking easy it would be to take his sunshine away. "Don't wait too long to decide, Justin. Don't listen to your mind because all it will do is catalog all the reasons you shouldn't take the chance. Don't listen to your heart because it's fickle and both love and hate can be painted with both sides of the same brush. Listen from the same place you paint from, Justin. Listen to your soul. It will never steer you wrong."

"Wow. Behind that pretty face is a philosophical mind. And just think there are two such pretty faces running around the earth."

Jason laughed. "Yeah. You may blame Jeremiah for that portion of me. The downside of having a twin is that sometimes you have more in common than you wish to. I'd rather spend my days in drinking and debauchery. Speaking of which--"

"Don't even think about it pretty boy. We already talked about the reason I won't fuck you again. It's a throwback rule but it still means a lot, even if we're just starting over."

"Oh alright, Blue eyes. But I will be admiring the merchandise as you shower." Jason laughed. "It was rare back then to find a twink with your...attributes. It's even more rare here."

It was Justin's turn to laugh. "So why not venture out of the Rochester area?"

"Oh I do, make no mistake. In fact if I have my way, I'll be getting the exact ass I want very soon."

"What's taking so long? Straight guy?"

"No. Well not exactly. He's bi but refuses to admit it. Currently he's in a relationship with a bi-woman and a lesbian."

"Poly? You're fucking kidding! You might as well hang your dick out the window, man. He's never leaving," Justin laughed. 

"I wouldn't be so sure," Jason said smugly letting Justin know that something was already in the making and if he knew Jason, the guy's knees were turning to jelly whenever they were around each other. 

"Well handle that ass with care, will you?" Justin laughed.

"Oh, never fear Justin, I intend to."

An hour after his morning conversation with Jason, he was back onto I-490 heading back into Pittsburgh with a whole lot to digest. 

 What is Love?- Timothy Mosley, James David Washington and Daniel Jones*