Lindsay:

By the tone of her voice, I knew that there was something wrong. Not just her not liking the idea of using Brian's sperm, but something bigger than that. So, I sat cautiously on the other side of the table- right in front of her- and waited for it to begin.

"I had a very interesting conversation with Brian today" she began.

Saying that I was confused was saying little, since when do they meet without telling me? Or without shedding blood?! Since when does she call Brian by his first name and not -asshole'? But I kept those doubts to myself and smiled calmly, I couldn't let her see how unsettled her words made me- rule number one of being a WASP. Even if I hated it, I don't mind manipulating others like my mother taught me I should... but with my wife and best friend, that's another thing.

Thank you very much mother! I thought sarcastically in my head, hating how she ruined another thing in my life. I couldn't be honest with my own wife! How is that fair?!

"What was it about?" I asked her softly, a lady should never raise her voice after all.

"You" she answered, my shock kept on growing by the second "You see, he told me why you are both so good friends... why you kept on pitching us against each other so constantly" this time I couldn't stop my eyes from widening in surprise, or looking at the floor ashamed at my behavior- her judging look was too much for me "I understand Lids, I really do my love. But... what you are doing is not ok. How would it make you feel if I kept on pushing you to get pregnant with the sperm of someone you hate, raise a child that would have the genes of someone you don't even like. I know you would still love that kid, just like I would love Brian's, because it would be part yours as well. However, do you ever stopped and thought how I was feeling?"

Her questioned made me stop and think. Then, I realized I never considered what she wanted, just what I wanted... just like my mother. The mere thought made me sick.

"Mel I..." I tried to justify myself, but she cut me off by raising her hand and a stern glare.

"I am talking right now, Lindsay. You are listening, this time" she told me, firmly "I felt like my wife didn't care about me, I felt abandoned and scared that you would leave me for him. All my fears that I was never enough for you, that you never really wanted me, that I was just a placeholder for a bigger fish, came true. I know now that nothing of that is true, that you love me and want to be by my side. But I had to learn that from Brian. Brian, the one I swore to hate more than anything on this planet. Not from you, my wife. That was even a bigger punch" I began to tear down, and nor my usual crocodile tears but real ones this time "You see, Linds... I blamed and punished a man that had done nothing but helped us from the beginning. I accept the blame for that, I should have seen more than just one point of view- but my jealousy and envy clouded my view. However, you are partly to blame for it too. If you hadn't manipulated us to hate each other- for a desperate cry for attention- then none of this mess and fights would have happened. We will butt heads a lot, that's for sure, but those will be only banters, not hurtful fights. Now that I see thing clearly, I don't hate Brian... that much. I consider him a friend now, and wouldn't mind raising his son with him. But we will not... at least, not now"

"What? Why?!" I demanded to know, not liking having her making me hope that what I wanted was so close just for her to take it away from me.

"Did you even hear anything I just said, Lindsay?!" she exclaimed angrily, making me jump in my seat in surprise- she never used that tone with me "You manipulated the ones you swear you love the most! Your wife and your best friend. You might have not stopped to think about what I would feel, but did you ever consider what Brian might feel because of your actions? The one you love like a little brother and swore to protect like you wished your own sister would have? No, you didn't. You used him as if he was your own private bank! You made him feel used, as if he wasn't worth anything without his money. That's an awful thing to do Linds, and what's worse is that you don't even see that what you did was wrong" I was stunned by her accusation, but didn't even tried to justify myself. After all, she was right "I paid him back every cent he gave us in the house. And don't you dare say it wasn't necessary, that Brian wouldn't have expected us to pay him back. He was expecting us to do that, that's the definition of 'borrowed'. Wouldn't you have expected the same if he had asked you for money?"

"That's not the same..." I tried to protest, but it sounded weak even to myself. 

"How is it not the same? Is EXACTLY the same thing! I know you love Brian and that's why you want him to be the father, that you know he'll never do the same thing our parents did. That Brian will love and never turned his back to our child... but you also, want his money. Something I'll make sure you won't get, Lindsay. Brian deserves better than that... I deserve better than that" her words were like knives to my heart "Brian will keep full rights to the child and will have them stay with him three days a week. Vacations will be arranged later. He won't give us support money, his support he'll show it by paying for Gus' pre-school, primary school and high school educations. While we'll be paying for his uniform and school materials. The three of us will put the same amount of money each month for the baby's college fund, one that won't be modified or touched until our child is eighteen. Brian will also pay for the child's medical insurance, anything that should be paid extra or any medicament will come from our pockets. And whatever toy, or clothes, or crib, or car seat, or how we want to decorate their room in our house, we'll pay for it. Not, Brian. We are responsible adults, we don't need someone to maintain us while we cruise through life like we are entitled. Brian will have his own toys, clothes, crib, care seat and room to decorate to take care of. He can't pay for us, as well. No matter how much you think he has to, because you'll have his son"

I could only sit there and stare at my wife, she had never ever talked to me like this... I didn't like it at all.

"We were given by Brian a three month trial run, he was right when he told me that we aren't ready to have a child now. If we can't be honest with each other, maintain our relationship stable... how is this a good atmosphere for our child to be raised in? He wants us to go to individual psychologists and a couple counselor, and I really think we should. Remember Lindsay, three months for you to finally stop treating me as a placeholder and Brian as your private bank... or else you'll have no child and no wife" with that said, she took her keys and jacket, before she left the house.

I only was able to look at her retreating back as I thought: How did I end up like this?