Credence

Chapter 8: “Deeper & Deeper”

We all want to fall in love. Why?

Because that experience makes us feel completely alive.

Where every sense is heightened, every emotion is magnified, our everyday reality is shattered and we are flying into the heavens. ~From-‘The Mirror Has Two Faces’

September

Justin grabbed Gus’ luggage from the Jeep as Brian helped Gus out of the car.

“I had a real good time,” Gus said. “Can we go to New York again?”

“If that’s what you want to do for your birthday next year, we can,” Brian said.

They had spent the last four days touring New York City, mostly from a child’s perspective as Brian and Justin’s birthday gift for Gus. Friday, they went to the Children’s Museum of the Arts. Brian hadn’t thought he’d have any fun there, but Justin and Gus’ excitement and wonder pulled him in and he found himself engaging in all the activities they did, some without any encouragement from them. Saturday they went to The Museum of Natural History, Sunday was spent touring Central Park and visiting the zoo there and this morning they’d gone to the Museum of Modern Art. Gus had heard Justin say that he’d never not made a trip there while he visited New York and that this trip would be the first. Being a budding artist himself, Gus, forgoing a trip to Brooklyn’s Children’s Museum, had declared that their final day’s itinerary would take them there.. Justin had felt bad and tried to persuade Gus out of his choice, but Gus was adamant about seeing a museum he often heard his mother talk about and knew that his new favorite person, Justin, loved. Gus had a great time there, alleviating Justin’s worries. Brian found that his son wasn’t the only one getting an education on the art they saw and understood why the Bloom Gallery had hired Justin. The man not only was a talented artist who knew about art, he had a passion for it and conveyed it with stories about artists and their works in a way that would interest anyone. Once they’d toured all of MOMA, Gus and Brian both having a new appreciation for art and sore feet, it was time to return to the hotel, get their luggage and fly home.

“That’s what I want,” Gus said, pulling on his father’s hand to stop him. He quirked his finger and jerked Brian’s wrist again.

Whenever Gus was going to tell a secret, this is what he would do, so Brian bent down and turned his head so Gus could whisper in his ear.

“Will Justin go with us next year?” he whispered.

Justin had stopped behind Gus and Brian and pretended not to listen to the secret conversation, but it was a quiet night and he easily picked up on Gus’ question. He couldn’t see Brian’s expression so no matter what he answered, Justin was sure that it would only be to appease his son.

“Is that you want?” Brian quietly asked.

“I want Justin around forever,” Gus said and hugged Brian. “Can you marry him?”

Brian looked behind him and from the look on Justin’s face he knew the man had heard them. He stood up and took Gus’ hand, leading him up the path to Lindsay and Melanie’s front porch. “Justin and I haven’t known one another long enough for that.”

Justin relaxed, knowing that Brian had given Gus his honest answer. The trouble was, had Gus asked him that question, he would’ve had to lie so that Gus wouldn’t get his hopes up. Spending four days straight with Brian and Gus had only made his feelings for the man strengthen. He knew that Brian acted a lot different when it was just the two of them alone, but with Gus, he was even more open and unguarded. Justin was deeply in love with Brian. If Brian proposed to him and Justin believed that Brian really wanted it, he would marry him tonight.

The front door of the house opened and Lindsay and Melanie came out onto the porch. “You’re home!” Lindsay declared.

“Good to see he’s back in one piece,” Melanie drawled.

Brian glared. “Your weekend of muncher debauchery has come to an end.”

Melanie glared back. “And now I suppose your week of....”

“Mel,” Lindsay cut her wife off. “Did you have fun?” she called to Gus.

“We had so much fun!” Gus yelled excitedly, dropping his father’s hand and making a run for his mothers.

Justin followed behind Brian and up to the porch, laughing a little as he heard Gus begin to rattle off the things they’d done together, barely breathing in between sentences. They all went inside for a few minutes to talk about the trip, Melanie constantly praising Justin for being such a good role model for her son and how pleased she was that he was so happy. This made Justin feel uncomfortable as he continuously had to tell her that Brian had just as much to do with Gus’ happiness, if not more, than he did. By the time they left, Justin was quite pissed off.

Brian could tell that Justin was agitated and knew the reason why but could do little about it until they left. “Don’t worry about it,” he told him, starting the Jeep and heading for the loft.

“How can I not worry about it? Scratch that, how can you not worry about it? Sure, you two trade barbs and usually they seem more in good fun than malicious but she was just so...”

“Cunty?” Brian filled in and laughed.

“How can you laugh?” Justin asked in a serious tone. “You gave her your child. You support him financially far better than you should have to given that they both have good paying jobs. You do so much for Gus and not just this weekend and she was such a bitch.”

“She’ll be sickeningly nice to me the next time she sees me,” Brian told him casually, “just watch.”

“How do you figure that?”

“You weren’t the only one who was pissed at her bullshit. Lindsay hides it well, but she was fuming. It’s not a big deal and I’m not going to waste my time thinking about it. Besides, she was just taking out the shitty news she received today on me.”

“What shitty news?” Justin asked. “You took Gus to New York and he came home happy and excited, what’s shitty in that?”

“Remember the phone call I got from Michael before we were boarding the plane?”

“Yeah, what about it?”

“A little while ago Mel asked him to give her his sperm and today he gave her his answer.” To be clear, he added, “He turned her down and he said she cried. I’ve seen Melanie cry twice in all the years I’ve known her. She was taking it out on me because, as she told Michael, she thinks I talked him out of it.”

“But you didn’t, did you?”

“I don’t own anyone’s sperm but my own, what Michael or anyone does with theirs is none of my business. Michael talked to me about it, yeah, but I didn’t talk him out of it.”

“Still Brian, she had no right to be like that after everything you’ve done for them.” Justin recalled what Melanie had said to him when she’d come to the hotel and noticed everything that Brian had bought him. Melanie was well aware of all Brian had done for her and Lindsay, but she’d allowed her disappointment about Michael’s decision to get in the way of remembering that. Perhaps Brian was right and there was no need to get worked up about it and there was nothing he could do to change any of it, but he was determined that he would never forget all Brian had done for him. Even more, he was determined to show Brian how much he appreciated him just because of who he was.

He had been planning a surprise for the man for a long time and it was almost finished. But that would only be the first of the surprises he began to plan for his boyfriend. He loved Brian and accepted him for who he was, but he also loved who he knew Brian could be and he wanted to be the man that could show Brian that he deserved as much happiness as he was constantly assuring his friends had in their own lives.

~~~~~

Ben held the leveler above the top two canvases and declared, “It’s perfect.”

Justin surveyed the work and nodded. “It is. Thank you for helping me. That weird curve in the wall threw me and I couldn’t figure out how to get all four of them to hang evenly.”

Ben began putting away his tools in his toolbox and replied, “No problem. I needed an excuse to get out of the house anyway.”

Justin walked over to the kitchen and opened the fridge. “Want a beer?”

“Just a bottle of water is fine,” Ben said, placing the toolbox on the island counter top as he took a seat.

“I have no idea how Brian hung that ugly naked guy painting. You were the only one I could think of to call that I knew wouldn’t spoil the surprise for Brian. When you told me what you were in the middle of doing, I was surprised you came.” Justin handed Ben a water bottle and took the cap off his beer. “So, are Michael and Emmett driving you crazy with wedding plans?”

Ben nodded. “It isn’t so much the planning that’s driving me nuts, it’s the money. I want Michael to have the wedding of his dreams but every time they get together, there’s a new something that he wants or needs. We’ve got a crew coming in a few days to put a new roof on our house and that’s going to cost almost ten grand. Emmett has waved his planning fee, but everything else isn’t cheap. If it were legal, I’d just insist on us eloping.”

“It’s that bad?” Justin asked.

Ben sighed. “He’s turning into groomzilla. We’d planned to place the order for the greenery and flowers with Emmett today. We were all set to use Christmas Cactuses for the reception centerpieces on the tables, Poinsettia and white Kalenchoe for the aisle decorations and Holly and Ivy boutonnières. They’re all fairly cheap but then Emmett showed us sample arrangements that looked very elegant. As we were about to fill out the order form with Emmett, Michael kept second-guessing our choices and then he said that last night he had a dream and that instead of us using the flowers we’d agreed upon, he wants to use all white flowers. And not just any white flowers. He wants white roses, white lilies and...” Ben trailed off. “I can’t remember the names of the other ones. Emmett was immediately excited at the prospect until he started calculating the costs and at that point Michael turned his puppy dog eyes on me.”

Justin laughed softly. “I take it puppy dog eyes usually make you give in?”

“You have no idea,” Ben said. “I don’t care what our wedding looks like as long as Michael is happy, but the extra cost of the flowers he wants to use would put us over our budget four thousand dollars.”

“Four thousand dollars?” Justin couldn’t believe that flowers were that expensive. “Just for flowers?”

Ben nodded and frowned. “It was so hard to tell Michael that we couldn’t up our wedding budget. I asked them to find somewhere to cut out the four thousand from other wedding expenses, he started hyperventilating, telling me everything else was perfect already and that’s when you called.”

Justin grinned. “No wonder why you were so eager to come help me.”

Ben glanced at his watch. “It’s been about and hour.” He threw his empty bottle in the trash, grabbed his sweater and toolbox. “Hopefully they’ve figured it out by now.”

“Well you know where I’ll be if they haven’t and you need to get away,” Justin said, walking Ben to the loft door.

Ben glanced over at the four canvases and then back to Justin. “I think when Brian gets home and sees his surprise; you’re not going to want to be disturbed.”

Justin slid the door open for Ben and smiled. “I just hope the client signs with him so he’s in a good mood and will appreciate them.”

“Either way,” Ben assured, “he will. He’d be crazy not too.”

“Good luck,” Justin said, giving Ben a quick hug.

“You too.” Ben gave a small wave before getting on the elevator.

Justin shut the loft door behind him and looked at the clock on the microwave. He had no idea how long it would take Brian to schmooze the client, but he hoped it wouldn’t be much longer. He hated that his Saturday plans with Brian were derailed when the client had called to request a sudden dinner meeting while they were in the midst of acting out page 43, titled: ‘Tongue Wrestling’. Though it’d given him time to get the canvases into the loft to surprise Brian, he was anxious for Brian to come home and see them and even more anxious to pick up where they left off, and then some.

***

Justin was having a bowl of Cheerios for a snack when he heard the door being unlocked. He watched as it slid open and Brian strutted in. Dressed in a pin-striped gray suit with a deep purple tie and shirt, he was stunning. He dropped his briefcase, spun and closed the door and faced Justin, giving him a devilish smirk. Justin let out a deep breath. “You got it!”

Brian shrugged. “Was there any doubt?”

“Of course not.” Justin pushed his bowl away from him and slid off the barstool to greet Brian properly. He kissed him but pulled back just as Brian was about to unbutton his jeans. “Wait, wait,” he said, taking his hands. “I have a surprise for you.” He turned Brian toward the group of canvases, each cell a part of one large painting.

Brian’s eyes widened as he saw the abstract painting. “You painted it yourself?” he asked, walking closer to the canvases.

Justin bit his lip and spoke nervously, “Yeah. Do you like it?”

Brian appraised the painting and nodded slowly. “How did you do this?”

“Ben came over to help me hang it up because I wanted it to be a surprise,” Justin explained. He couldn’t read Brian’s expression or the tone of his voice and wondered if he’d let his ego get ahead of himself.

“That’s not what I meant,” Brian said, crossing his arms. “How did you paint this?”

“I had Daphne take pictures of me and painted from them. Could you immediately tell it was me? Ben couldn’t tell because he said he could tell it wasn’t you and figured I’d hired a model for it. I didn’t tell him otherwise.” He was terrified that he’d made the wrong decision and that every single person that walked into the loft would know that it was him. He had hoped that the abstract style would throw everyone off.

Brian looked at Justin and raised his eyebrow. “You really have thrown away your inhibitions, young grasshopper.”

Justin began to panic. “Brian, can you really tell it’s me?”

“Of course I can tell that it’s you, but you don’t make a point of showing anyone else your naked body, do you?”

“No, of course not,” Justin said. “You’re the only man that’s seen me naked for any length of time.”

Brian smirked at Justin’s admission even though he walked around every day knowing that.

“Trent’s seen me in my swim trunks and when I showed him the painting yesterday he didn’t even guess that it was me. Just like Ben, he thought I’d hired a model to sit for it.”

“I doubt any model you could hire would have an ass as perfect as yours.” Brian asked, “But Daphne knows?”

“Well I had to have someone take pictures, but she’ll never tell anyone. So you don’t think that anyone will know it’s me?”

Brian moved behind Justin and molded the smaller man’s back to his front. He dipped his head and spoke softly, “No.” He laughed softly. “I’m just surprised you’d be so open to this. I always heard artists hate painting themselves.”

“I don’t mind painting portraits of myself, but this was definitely me stepping out of my comfort zone. I couldn’t have done that without you, you know.” Justin may have had confidence before he met Brian but he allowed the restrictions from his allergies to dictate a lot of things in his life that they shouldn’t have. Brian showed him that he could still take risks and Brian made him feel safe when he took them.

Brian hadn’t ever thought he’d be considered ‘safe’ for anyone, but Justin’s words rang true to him, only in the opposite manner. As he thought about it, Justin had done the same thing for him. He’d taken many risks in his life, but going for it, with Justin, that was a risk that really mattered and even though he had moments where he freaked out about having a boyfriend, those moments grew fewer the more time he spent with the man. Brian knew exactly how Justin felt, though he’d never dare to articulate it the way Justin had.

“You want to know what I’ve named it?” Justin asked.

“Let me guess,” Brian said in a high pitched tone, “exposition in four ways?”

Justin laughed. “No. It’s called, ‘Risqué Safety’.”

“Appropriate.”

“So you like it?”

“I love it,” Brian admitted.

Justin smiled and his heart raced. He knew that Brian said he loved the painting, not him, but it was a painting of him, of his naked body so at least that was Brian admitting he loved his naked body, well at least the back side of him.

Brian unbuttoned Justin’s jeans with one hand, his other sliding inside his pants, his fingers dipping into the crack of Justin’s ass. “When we first talked about replacing the ugly naked guy painting, I knew you’d paint something beautiful for me, but I didn’t know it’d be you.”

Justin’s knees weakened and he reached up to put his hands behind Brian’s neck to hold himself up as Brian began stroking his cock over his underwear. “I’m glad... you like it,” he stuttered.

Brian playfully bit Justin’s earlobe and then licked and admitted, “I more than like it, Sunshine.”

***

Justin screamed into the pillow as Brian’s cock pushed through his tight slippery thighs and up against his balls. Brian’s hand pulled his hair and his mouth bit the back of his neck. Justin came without tugging his cock, his body rocking and swaying as his cock jerked against his belly, spraying come onto his skin and the tangled sheets below him. He fell onto the mattress and moaned as his dick twitched from over-stimulation, just from touching the sheets. He was exhausted and didn’t want to move, but he wanted to watch Brian come too.

He turned his head and opened his eyes, looking behind him to see Brian, still on his knees, his eyes focused on his back, hand jacking his red cock at a merciless pace. Brian’s eyes flickered up to meet his and at that moment he began to come, grunting low and deep as he aimed his silky emission onto the back of his legs and Justin loved it. Jerking off and feeling his own come on his belly, chest and hand could never compare to the satisfaction he felt from Brian coating his skin, hot creamy evidence to the pleasure Justin gave him.

Justin closed his eyes and fell asleep, waking hours later to Brian shaking his shoulder and telling him, “Mel’s on the phone, she says it’s urgent.”

“Time is it?” Justin mumbled, rolling away from Brian.

“It’s after ten, wake up and talk to Mel,” Brian said.

Justin’s eyes opened and he pulled at the crumpled sheets to cover his naked body. “Mel’s here?” he asked worriedly, looking out past the bedroom and wondering why Brian had let her in the loft when he knew he had slept naked.

Brian laughed. “No, she’s on the phone,” he said, his hand waving the device in front of Justin.

Justin looked at the phone as if it were an alien form of technology. “That’s not my phone!”

Brian sat down on the bed beside Justin and rolled his eyes. “It’s mine, she tried calling yours but it’s on silent. Are you coherent enough to talk to her? She said it’s important.”

Justin turned his head and Brian’s lips looked so delectable as he spoke to him he couldn’t help but pull him closer and taste them.

“Now is not the time to start fucking!” Mel’s voice yelled loud enough for both Brian and Justin to hear.

Justin laughed and grabbed the phone from Brian. “Sorry,” he told the woman in a sleepy tone.

“It’s fucking upside down.” Brian moved the phone correctly in Justin’s hand and wondered if he’d managed to fuck Justin’s brains out without actually fucking him.

“Mel?”

“I’m here. Sorry for waking you but it’s an emergency.”

Justin gasped. “What happened?”

“Nothing bad,” Melanie told him. “The landlord’s lawyer left a message on my cell’s voicemail Friday afternoon while I was at lunch with a client but for some reason it didn’t come in as a new message until this morning. As of noon tomorrow, your accounts will reflect the deposit of the settlement and as per the agreement; you need to sign the last of the papers with a notary present within twenty-four hours of the deposit. I’ll need you and Trent to do that tomorrow morning.”

“But I’ve got work tomorrow morning,” Justin said worriedly.

“Don’t worry about work,” Melanie interrupted. “I told Lindsay, it’s my fault and I really thought we’d have more notice about the exact deposit date. She knows and she says she’ll be fine without an assistant for a few hours. I’ve already spoken to Trent and he’ll be there. It shouldn’t take more than an hour and then you’ll be walking out a very, very rich man. Well, technically, you’re a rich man right now; your bank account just won’t show it until tomorrow morning.”

“Holy shit!” Justin was definitely awake now. He bounced on the bed and told Brian, “I’m fucking rich!”

“So I can retire and you can support me for the rest of our lives?” Brian drawled.

“Not even ten times what I got with this settlement would be enough for that,” Justin said and kissed Brian. “Melanie, thank you so much for doing this,” he said, going back to the call. “What time and where should I meet you tomorrow?”

“Nine o’clock at the court house. We’ll be on the second floor in conference room 205; it’s all the way at the end of the hall. If you have any trouble finding us, give me a call on my cell phone, okay?”

“Will do.” Justin’s heart raced as all the spending possibilities entered his mind. “Thank you!”

“You’re very welcome. It was a pleasure to do this for you and Trent. It’s rare to have a case like this resolved so quickly, but their documented negligence, thanks in part to Brian’s pictures of the building, along with them wanting to keep this as quiet as possible worked in our favor. I’d better let you get back to Brian, I’m sure you’ll want to celebrate with him,” she said.

“I definitely do,” Justin told her. “Bye.” He closed and tossed the phone aside before launching himself at Brian, kissing all over his face. “She said your pictures really helped, you know. How am I going to repay you?”

Brian pushed Justin away from him and got out of bed. “In the shower, you on your knees, my dick in your mouth,” he mock ordered.

Justin scrambled happily out of the bed and dashed into the bathroom.

***

“Justin, wait up,” Melanie called.

Justin turned and stopped on the courthouse steps and faced Melanie. “Did I forget to sign something?” he asked as she walked closer to him.

“No, I just needed to talk to you about something.” Melanie sat on the step beside Justin’s feet and motioned for him to sit. “If you have the time.”

“I guess. Lindsay said I didn’t need to go in until eleven.” Justin sat down feeling hesitant about doing so. He still hadn’t gotten over how rude she’d been to Brian and though he was fine speaking to her client to lawyer, he wasn’t sure he was ready to speak friend to friend without confronting her about her behavior.

“I know you and Brian were upset with me for the way I acted when you dropped Gus off. I wanted to apologize.”

“It took you long enough,” Justin said. At the look of shock on Melanie’s face he added, “It isn’t me that you should apologize to.”

“It is,” Melanie said. “If you talked that way to Lindsay I wouldn’t have been able to keep my mouth shut. It was disrespectful and rude and I’m sorry. I didn’t have a good day and I let things that I realize now had nothing to do with Brian, get to me and I took them out on him.”

“I heard about Michael turning you guys down,” Justin admitted. “I’m sorry about that.”

“It was really disappointing, it still is. But, as Lindsay was quick to remind me the moment you two left, it wasn’t Brian’s fault and I shouldn’t have taken it out on Brian and put any of you through that. I really did mean all the things I said to you though, you’re amazing with Gus and he really loves you.”

“And Brian?” he prompted.

Melanie nodded. “He’s a good father. I might not have thought he was at first, but given his past can you really blame me? The last couple of years he’s proved that he is indeed a good father and he did what he had to do to be a constant in Gus’ life when Lindsay and I were having problems.”

“Are you going to apologize to Brian?”

Melanie sighed. “I will, but I’m sure he won’t want to hear it.”

Justin grimaced. “Don’t sell him short. He is human.”

Melanie smiled at Justin. “You’ve definitely helped him show that human side more often. And I think maybe I’ll stop by Exhibition today and apologize.”

“That sounds like a good idea, though he’s going to be catching a two o’clock flight and will be gone on business for a few days. You might want to go now, I just hung up with him and he’s having an early lunch so I don’t think you’ll be disturbing him.”

“Right, I forgot. Lindsay said he called Gus this morning before school to say goodbye to him.” Melanie hugged Justin before standing. “I’m going to get going. We should have dinner together sometime this week.”

“Okay,” Justin said, happy that Melanie was making the effort to apologize. He had no idea how Brian would react, but he knew that even if Brian wouldn’t admit it, it would mean something to him. “I know Gus wants to come swim at the hotel again, maybe you and Lindsay can bring him and we can eat at one of the restaurants there?”

“That’s a great idea. Just let Lindsay know when it’s good for you.”

“I will,” Justin said, walking the opposite direction. “Thanks for everything, Mel!”

“You’re welcome.”

As Justin descended the last stair of the courthouse he caught sight of Trent leaning against a shiny black BMW car parked in the lot.

“I was wondering when you’d come out!”

“I did, years ago,” Justin joked, running over to him. “When did you get this?”

“Yesterday, after Melanie called me and told me the check cleared. I wanted to surprise you so I didn’t say anything inside.”

“It’s beautiful,” Justin admitted. “But how did you buy it yesterday?”

“I didn’t, my step-dad loaned it to me to test drive for a few days to see if I like it enough to buy it.”

“Ahh, the perks of having a step-dad who owns a car dealership.”

“My dad said he expects you to come see him soon,” Trent said. “He’s promised to sell you a car at cost. If you hadn’t gotten me in touch with Melanie, there’s no way I’d have gotten the settlement so quick.” Trent grinned and clicked the unlock button on his keychain. “So, you want to ride to work in style?”

Justin smiled. “Yes, Jeeves, I believe I do. But first, if you’re not in any hurry, can we make a pit-stop?”

“Where?”

“To the mall of course,” Justin said. “I’ve still got a little over an hour before I have to be at work.”

“The mall it is,” Trent agreed. “The question is, how much money can we spend in an hour?”

“Far too much I’m sure,” Justin giggled.

***

Melanie, Lindsay and Justin sat at a table near the indoor pool, wrapped in towels and sipping iced tea while they watched Gus and his best friend swim.

“I hope you don’t mind that we brought Eli with us,” Lindsay said. “When we first made plans I’d completely forgotten that I told Gus he could have Eli spend the night tonight.”

“It’s really fine,” Justin assured. “It’s good he’s got someone to swim with or he’d be convincing me to stay in with him the whole time.”

Melanie laughed. “He told me that you and Brian took him swimming every night at the hotel in New York. He loved it.”

“We loved it,” Justin said. “Brian and I both love swimming, we probably would’ve stayed in the pool until it closed every night if Gus wasn’t so wiped out from all the activity. He’s the one that actually wanted to go up to the room and get ready for bed every night.”

Lindsay shared a smile with Melanie, took a deep breath and asked, “Have you ever considered having children?”

“Of course,” Justin said, “but I don’t think I’ll want one for a long time from now.”

“Oh?” Melanie said. “Why’s that?”

“I’m young and...” he stopped himself from adding ‘in love’. “I... I want to enjoy being young. I’ve had to work really hard with school and trying to support myself. Now that I’ve got some money to make things a little easier, I think I’m going to relax for a while and enjoy my career and friends without all the stress I’ve been under since I graduated high school.”

“Well... would nine months or so be a long enough time for you to relax?” Lindsay asked.

Justin almost spilled his cup of tea all over himself as he suddenly understood where this conversation was going He placed it back on the table and looked away from the women. “I... don’t really know.”

“Well maybe you could think about it?” Lindsay implored.

“What’s there to think about?” Justin asked in a tight voice and looked back at Gus and Eli, wondering why he’d asked such a thing.

“What Lindsay is trying to say is that we’d like for you to father my child,” Melanie said.

Justin blinked slowly and swallowed. “Uh...”

“You don’t have to answer right this moment,” Lindsay said. “This is just something for you to give some thought.”

Justin carded his fingers through his wet hair and groaned. “Lindsay, Melanie, I really like you two and I love Gus but I’m not ever going to have children of my own.”

“But you said you’d thought about having children,” Lindsay softly spoke, confused.

“Yes,” Justin admitted. “I have thought about having a child, one day. But if I did, I’d either like to adopt or my partner, whomever he may be, if he wanted a child too, would be the one to provide the DNA to a surrogate, not me.”

“But Justin, you’re talented, smart and gorgeous,” Melanie said. “Why wouldn’t you want to pass on your DNA?”

“I know you guys know about my allergies,” Justin explained, “but you don’t know all of them and if you did, you’d understand why I wouldn’t want to risk having a child that would likely have all the same ones, if not more.”

“I have an allergy to beets,” Lindsay said, “but Gus doesn’t. Your children might not have any allergies at all.”

“My mother and grandmother also have allergies. They’ve gotten worse with every generation, though my sister lucked out and doesn’t have any. My mother’s allergies are mainly skin allergies, but my list of allergies surpasses anyone’s in my family. They’ve limited my life and experiences. They’ve made it difficult for me to have friends and relationships. There might be something wrong with my genes and I’m not going to pass them along knowing that there’s a good chance my child could have allergies that would limit their life more than mine have limited my own.”

“So you have more than just food allergies?” Melanie asked.

“Yes, quite a few more,” Justin said. “I also have allergies to vaccines, medication and certain fibers and materials. My mother had a hell of time getting me registered at school after they realized I couldn’t have the last dose of the polio vaccination.”

“But aren’t there substitutes now for those types of things?” Lindsay asked.

“Nothing my doctors have been willing to try. I’ve had too many reactions to drugs that have left me sick or in the hospital for weeks.”

“So you could actually catch polio?” Melanie asked worriedly.

“Yes and any other disease that people are vaccinated for after the age of six.”

“Honey, I’m sorry Melanie and I asked, it must be hard to talk about this. We didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“You didn’t know,” Justin said, “and I’m honored that you would want me to father your child. I’m sorry I can’t do it, but you’re not hurting me. I’ve had a long time to deal with it and it doesn’t mean that I can’t have a child. As I’m sure you both know, a child doesn’t have to be your blood for you to love him like he is.”

“Yes,” Melanie said while Lindsay nodded.

“Does Brian know about this?” Lindsay asked carefully.

Justin shook his head. “He knows what I’m allergic to, he knows every one of my allergies but the whole me not fathering a child thing has never come up. Besides, he has a son so it really shouldn’t affect him.”

Lindsay shook her head. “No, you’re wrong. Before Melanie had a procedure done, we weren’t sure she could carry a child. It definitely affected me because I love her and I was sad that she wouldn’t experience what I had.”

“But it’s different and not only because you’re women and she would’ve missed out on carrying the baby,” Justin told her. “Brian and I aren’t partners. If we ever did get married, then maybe we’d discuss this stuff but for now, there really isn’t any need.”

Lindsay grinned. “Justin, just because you two are in the early stages of your relationship, that doesn’t mean you’re not already partners. You have done what no other man has managed to do.”

Justin rolled his eyes. “Tied a ball and chain to his leg?”

“Yeah right,” Melanie said. “Like Brian would allow that. Justin, something to keep in mind about Brian Kinney is that he doesn’t ever do anything he doesn’t really want to do, no matter what he might say. You got him believing that sharing a future with someone he can love and care about is preferable to...”

“Being alone?” Justin huffed.

“To being without you,” Melanie finished her statement. “Because being alone, being a stud, or going out in a blaze of glory, that holds no draw to him, but being without you, that’s a worse prospect than the others and I think he knows that.”

Lindsay nodded. “She’s right. Don’t sell your relationship short on our account; I’m sure you must know just how deeply Brian cares for you and that you’re not the only one thinking about your future together.”

Justin gave a silent nod in acceptance of what his friends were saying but he still kept himself guarded. He knew they had good intentions and it was nice that they thought he was special enough to be the man in Brian’s future, but they weren’t around to see the scared look Justin would catch Brian giving him whenever they’d get a little ‘too close’. They weren’t around to hear the cheesy declarations of Brian’s feelings one moment, only to hear him make sarcastic cutting remarks the next. Then again, Mel and Linds also didn’t know that Brian Kinney had gone monogamous and given up not only tricking but fucking altogether(just a suggestion) to take a chance on them. Justin didn’t think any of Brian’s friends knew about that and he wasn’t in a hurry to tell anyone.

***

“Sweetie, are you sure this is what you want to do?” Jennifer asked.

“Mom, I’ve paid off my student loans, medical bills and bought a car. I’ve got a great job, a hot boyfriend, and wonderful friends and family. My life is almost complete. All I need now is my dream house!”

Jennifer hugged Justin close and kissed his cheek. “I’m glad you’re so happy. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen you like this, if ever.” She held him at arm’s length and looked into his shining blue eyes. “You’re in love, for the first time, aren’t you?”

Justin’s cheeks pinked and he turned away from his mother, not wanting to tell her the truth because if he did, if he spoke the truth aloud, he might not be able to control himself from speaking it to Brian. He knew that if he did, it would push Brian away. Resolved not to answer, he turned back to face her and changed the subject to the reason for his visit to her office. “So, do you think you can find me a house?”

“You can’t just avoid my question, no matter how much you think if you do it’ll make it the answer, which we both know is ‘yes’ less true.”

Justin rolled his eyes. “Mom, the house?”

Realizing she would not get an answer from Justin, Jennifer asked, “You’re certain this is what you want to do with the money? Wouldn’t buying a condo or…”

“I talked to Ted and he told me that with the real estate market being what it is, I should definitely invest in a house, specifically, one that I plan to live in for at least ten years. This way, I’ll likely be able to recoup any investments I may make with upgrades, if I do decide to sell one day. If I buy a condo and want to move within the next five years to something bigger, he doesn’t think I’ll see much profit from my sale, if any at all.”

Jennifer looked at her son in a new light. “You really have grown up, Justin. I’m proud of you.” She took a seat behind her desk and grabbed a pen and paper. “Take a seat and tell me what you’re looking for.”

Justin sat down in the chair and propped his feet up on his mother’s desk. “Well, I definitely need a studio. So whatever house we find, it’s got to have a space that’s private and has great light, or the option for me to make something into a studio.”

“Like more than one garage or a large attic space?” Jennifer suggested.

“Yup.”

“What else is important to you?”

“I don’t want anything that I have to do any extensive renovations to. I want it to be ‘turn-key’, with the exception of a studio space if need be and upgrading fixtures or whatever; that kind of thing.”

“With the budget you have, I’m sure we can find some amazing homes. What about number of bedrooms?”

“At least five.”

Jennifer blanched at Justin’s quick and surprising answer and hesitantly wrote it down on her notepad. “Why five?”

“Well, I’d like one large master and… listen, before you say anything, Brian and I… I have no idea what will happen in the future, but if something big does happen, I’ll want to have a place for Gus if Brian decides to live with me.”

Jennifer’s eyes widened and she forced herself not to grill Justin about those comments. “Number of bathrooms?”

“I want one to be on the first floor, if there aren’t any bedrooms on the first floor, that’s a must. Remember how you always hated sending guests upstairs to use the restroom?”

“Yes I do. That almost made your father and I not buy the house, but the backyard was so beautiful, I thought it’d make up for it.”

“So, one bathroom at least on the first floor, a master bath ensuite and at least one other bathroom.”

“What about flooring? Do you have a preference?”

“I’d like wood floors throughout the house, except for maybe the kitchen and bathrooms. There, tile would work, but that’s something I guess I could fix. If the bedrooms have carpet, as long as it’s nice carpet, I could deal with it.”

“What about your backyard?”

Justin grinned widely. “I want land!”

“You, my little recluse, want land?”

“Yes. Because I want tennis courts, stables and a pool.”

Jennifer laughed and asked, “Are you serious?”

“Why not? I can afford it. I love swimming and playing tennis. Plus, I’ve always dreamt of having my own horse because they’re like the only animal that doesn’t make my allergies go nuts. Those summers I took riding lessons were the best I ever had. I want stables or big enough land if I decide to buy a horse one day. So you’d have to be sure about zoning and all that because only some zones allow for horses.”

“So you don’t want something here in Pittsburgh then? Because we’ll have to go outside of the city for sure, possibly out of state, to find you enough land for those things.”

“Out of state?” Justin asked.

“Yes, such as West Virginia. It’s about a half an hour from the suburbs of Pittsburgh.”

“It’s an hour from Pittsburgh, Mom. I’ve been there. Does your license even allow for you to sell in West Virginia?”

“Of course,” Jennifer said stiffly. “I know my job, Justin. I wouldn’t suggest it if it didn’t.”

“Sorry,” Justin muttered and dropped his feet down to the floor. He sat up straight and asked, “There really isn’t anything in Pittsburgh that has a lot of land?”

“There may be,” Jennifer said. “I’ve seen a few listings for some properties but the land is what people are buying, not the house and you want both.”

“I do.” Justin thought about his recent morning routine. “I used to catch the early bus for work, just to be sure that I’d show up on time and to do that, I had to leave the hotel an hour and a half before I started work. Now that I have a car, a commute that took an hour wouldn’t be a problem, so out of state, as long as it’s no more than an hour from the gallery, could work.”

“Darling, the last thing I want is for you to live far away, so I’ll do my best to find what you’re looking for as close to me as possible,” Jennifer told him, laughing. “Have you thought about the style of house you’d like?”

“It doesn’t really matter to me, as long as it isn’t some kind of eye sore. I do love Mel and Lindsay’s house, which is a remodeled Victorian,” Justin told her. “But I also love the Tudor style.”

Jennifer’s thoughts immediately went to the large Mansion two clients contracted her to sell two days ago. The clients had remodeled the home, but they’d divorced before they ever lived in it and it had sat empty for three years. Included in the home was custom furniture now covered by sheets, just waiting for someone to live in it and reveal its beauty. It was near Morgantown but it more than fit Justin’s needs list. However, she wanted to look for closer properties first before she showed him that listing. “All right, this is good to go on for now. I’ll put some listings together that fit your criteria and we can start viewing them on Thursday, will that work?”

“That’s perfect, as long as we can do that after work.”

Jennifer flicked through her appointment book and asked, “What’s your schedule like on Thursday?”

Justin’s schedule rotated with Lindsay’s and two other salaried employees. “I can be here at 2:00.”

“That’s perfect.” She wrote it into her appointment book and looked at her schedule for the tomorrow evening. “Why don’t you and Brian come over for dinner tomorrow?”

Justin sighed. “I can make it, but Brian’s out of town and won’t be back until next Wednesday.”

“For business?”

“Of course,” Justin said, laughing. “You don’t think he’d take a two-week vacation and leave me here, do you?”

“He’ll be gone for two weeks?” Jennifer fearfully asked.

“A little over two weeks, actually. He’s acquiring some new clients and schmoozing some others. It’s no big deal.”

“It can be hard on a relationship when one partner is gone for,” she paused and made quotation marks, “business.”

“Brian isn’t Craig,” Justin said bluntly. “He’s not on a ‘business retreat’ fucking his secretary. I trust him.”

“I know he isn’t,” Jennifer said firmly. “I was making a general statement that had nothing to do with your father. I am just worried about you. Distance isn’t easy for couples, especially new couples. That’s all I’m saying.”

“I appreciate you caring, but I’m a big boy, Mom. Most men my age have had more than one boyfriend by now.”

“Which is why I’m so worried. Brian’s been with…”

“He’s never been in a relationship,” Justin interrupted, standing up and grabbing his backpack. He was done with this conversation. “None of the other shit matters.” He walked over and kissed his mother’s cheek. “When Brian gets back we’ll figure out a date for dinner.”

Jennifer felt flustered by Justin’s quick goodbye. “What about dinner tomorrow night?”

Justin leaned against the doorway and sighed. “I’ll come but only if you promise not to start bugging me about my relationship with Brian.”

“Justin, I didn’t mean to upset you. I know you think that all those men Brian was with don’t matter, but they do.”

“Mom,” Justin spoke warningly.

“Okay, okay,” Jennifer said. “I’ll drop it.”

Justin nodded. “What time tomorrow?”

“Six?”

“All right, see you then.”

***

Brian rolled his eyes as he listened to Ted’s side of the phone call with who he was sure was Blake.

“I know, I miss you too,” Ted cooed. “Just two more days and I’ll be home. Uh-huh. I love you too. Bye.”

Brian glared at Ted as he pocketed his cell phone. “Are you finished playing the part of lesbian?”

Ted laughed. “Please, you’ve called Justin no less than three times a day since we’ve been gone. I’m willing to bet that there were many other calls than those.”

“Not one of our conversations involved that lovely-dovey bullshit.”

“Right, well, just because you don’t say ‘I love you’ or ‘I miss you’, it doesn’t mean you don’t think it.” Ted took his shot glass from the bar and downed it. “So, I haven’t failed to notice that no matter where we’ve been, you haven’t taken a single trick to a backroom or back to the hotel.”

Brian glared. “I don’t pay you for your tired observations, Theodore.”

Ted grinned. “Nice way to avoid answering the question.”

“What question?” Brian signaled the bartender for two more shots.

“Right, I guess I didn’t ask appropriately.” Ted watched Brian actually squirm in his bar stool and was certain this was the most fun he’d had the whole business trip. “Are you and Justin monogamous?”

“I’m surprised Michael didn’t blab my and Justin’s personal business to anyone who would listen.”

“Michael likes Justin,” Ted said, “which is saying something.”

“What exactly?” Brian was fairly buzzed and he was having a hard time following the fucked up conversation.

“Michael has moved on, he really truly has and he wants to see you happy.” Ted grabbed one of the shot glasses and raised it in toast. “To Michael.”

Brian shrugged, figured ‘what the hell’ and clinked his glass to Ted’s before drinking the whiskey. “If you must know, and Theodore, you’d better not utter a word of this,” he warned.

“My lips are sealed,” Ted said excitedly.

“Justin is allergic to condoms,” Brian said.

“Holy shit, you’re fucking raw?” Ted gasped.

A few men surrounding the bar glared at Brian. Brian flipped them the bird and leaned closer to Ted. “We’re doing everything except penetration… for now.”

“No shit.” Ted sat back in the stool and shook his head, a look of wonder on his face. “You really like him.”

Brian tilted his head to the side as if to say, ‘duh’.

“Shit, Blake and I are monogamous and it can be tough going on a trip like this to actually stay that way, but for you…”

“I’m doing just fine,” Brian said. The truth was he felt like he was being tested with every breath he took. Every single man he saw, whether they were his type or not, made him hard. As the days of the trip wore on, the only things keeping him from not fucking everything up was the nightly phone sex with Justin and the drive not to fail at his goal.

“So, you said, for now,” Ted pressed. “What exactly does that mean? Do you plan on fucking raw?”

Brian was buzzed, but not enough to divulge the truth of what ‘for now’ really meant. “Perhaps,” he replied with a mysterious tone.

Ted patted Brian on the back. “Well, good for you.”

“Huh?”

“You’re finally realizing that,” he gestured around the small bar filled with some of the hottest men he’d ever seen, “that all this, is meaningless compared to who you have waiting for you at home.”

Brian didn’t necessarily agree with Ted, but he didn’t care enough to get into that. He looked at his watch. “Let’s go.”

Ted chuckled. “Hot date?”

Brian instantly thought about the picture text he’d received from Justin right before they’d gone into the bar. He’d sent him two shots, one of his cock, hard and dripping pre-cum and another of his finger near his lips, shiny with pre-cum. The message had read: Wish I was tasting you. Can’t wait for you to cum home. Talk to you midnight.

Ted slid from his stool and threw a few bills on the bar top to cover their drinks. “No need to answer,” he told Brian. “The answer is written all over your face.”

***

Justin cleaned the drops of come he’d missed from Brian’s cock and gently tucked him back into his pants. He stood up and kissed the dazed man, sharing the last bit of the come stuck on his tongue.

Brian gripped Justin’s ass and spun him around, slamming him back against the stall door, causing a loud bang to reverberate around the bathroom.

“Sir?” a voice said from outside. “Are you all right in there?”

Brian cringed and covered Justin’s mouth with his hand. “I’m fine,” he spoke in a hoarse tone of voice.

Justin poked his tongue out between his lips and licked at Brian’s fingers.

Brian jerked his hand away just as a moan threatened to escape his throat. He teasingly glared at Justin.

They stared at one another, doing their best to stay totally silent until they heard the bathroom door open and close.

Justin grabbed some toilet paper from the roll and fished his cock out of his pants to wipe the come off. Brian grabbed the tissue from him and tossed it to the ground before sinking to knees and sucking up all the liquid he could find on Justin’s dick and covering his pubes. He gripped Justin’s thighs and swirled his tongue around the thickening shaft…

“Excuse me?” A deep male voice said before knocking on the bathroom stall door.

Brian’s eyes widened in alarm and he bolted to his feet, shoving Justin’s immediately soft dick back into his pants. “Yes?”

“Sir? This is airport security. We had a report that someone sounded like they were hurt. Are you and your companion all right in there?”

“We’re fine,” Brian said. “We’re just changing clothes.”

“And I tripped,” Justin added, “trying to change pants without my feet touching the disgusting floor.”

“For further notice, it would be more appropriate if you were to use separate stalls.”

Brian mouthed, ‘Stay here’, to Justin and slipped out of the stall, holding it closed behind him and encountering a familiar face. “Derek?”

“Ah, Brian,” the security guard chuckled. “Changing clothes? That’s the best you could come up with?”

“Come on out, Justin,” Brian said, glaring at Derek.

Justin came out of the stall, his face completely red from embarrassment. “Hi,” he said awkwardly.

“He’s a little young for you, don’t you think?” Derek asked Brian, raising his eyebrows.

“He is standing right here,” Justin said testily, sizing the man up.

Brian laughed. “Derek, this is Justin, my…”

“Your boyfriend?” Derek filled in, sounding shocked.

Justin jabbed Brian’s side with his elbow and held his hand out. “Yes, his boyfriend. And you are?”

“Derek Niles.” He shook Justin’s hand. “I worked as a security guard at Vangard and Ryder. I was Brian’s look out quite a few times,” he chuckled.

“Why aren’t you working there any longer?” Brian moved over to the sink and began to wash his hands, Justin following him to do the same.

“Gardner couldn’t afford me,” Derek said. “He’s putting up a good front, but for the last six months Vangard has been in hot water.”

“I’ve heard,” Brian told him, “but I didn’t think it was so bad he couldn’t afford security.”

“He’s still got Denny working for him, but he laid off me and two other guys. You’ve corralled most of his big accounts and the smaller ones can’t afford a big advertising campaign with the way the economy is. I spoke to Denny last week and he said Vance has been handing out pink slips like they’re candy.”

“So he’s going under?” Brian asked in a smug tone.

Derek looked at Brian with a wide grin. “You know more about this than you’re letting on, don’t you?”

“I’ve spent the last two-weeks flying all around this damn country picking up all the clients that Vangard dropped and stealing a few that had yet to drop him.”

“Good for you, Brian.” Derek turned to Justin. “You’re dealing with one clever man.”

Justin slid his hand into Brian’s and kissed the side of his mouth. “Don’t I know it.”

“Except for all that,” Derek spoke, pointing to the stall. “You two are lucky it was me. If it were any of the other officers you’d likely be being strip-searched or in a squad car.”

“We’ll be clever enough not to do it again, here,” Justin assured him.

Derek laughed. “Or just be clever enough to actually bring your luggage with you next time so that your excuse actually works.”

“Duly noted,” Brian quipped. “So, how’s the pay here?”

“Less than what I made at Vangard,” Derek groaned, “but it’s the only offer I got that came with benefits.”

Brian took out his wallet and handed Derek his business card. “I can do better than Vangard and give you full benefits. Give me a call.”

“Thanks, Brian, I will.”

Brian walked out of the bathroom with Justin and whispered to him, “That was hot.”

“We almost got busted,” Justin said. “It was worth it though.”

“Damn right it was.”

***

“Where did you park?” Brian asked, looking around for the Jeep.

Justin pointed to his new vehicle two rows down. “That dark blue Nissan Murano is me.”

Brian pulled his suitcase behind him and followed Justin toward the vehicle. “You bought a mini-van?” Brian asked in horror.

“It’s not a mini-van,” Justin said, laughing. “It’s a fucking SUV!” He figured that maybe it did sort of look like one from the front. “As if I would ever buy a fucking mini-van!”

“Thank god!” Brian said, following quicker. “I thought I was going to have to call a cab because there’s no way in hell I’d ride in one.”

Justin clicked the button for the trunk and stood back as it rose all on its own. “Awesome, isn’t it?”

“When did you buy this?” Brian asked. It wasn’t any car that he’d ever buy, but it seemed to fit Justin.

“A couple of days after you left. I wanted to surprise you,” Justin told him, placing the suitcase he carried into the trunk. “Your Jeep is safe and sound in the parking garage.”

Brian picked up his other suitcase and placed it in the trunk. “Decent trunk space for your canvases,” he commented.

Justin kissed Brian quickly and grinned. “That’s exactly why I bought this one.” He handed the keys to Brian. “Can you drive? I hated driving around the airport. If you hit someone, I don’t think I’ll be as mad as if I did it.”

Brian laughed, took the keys and they both got into the car. “So, what else have you been buying while I was away?” he asked, starting the engine.

Justin put his hand over Brian’s to stop him from putting the car in reverse. “Quite a lot of stuff,” he said waggling his eyebrows. “But my biggest purchase was a house.”

“What?” Brian gasped, staring at Justin, his mouth hanging open.

Justin leaned over and took advantage of Brian’s open mouth, kissing it until the other man finally managed to get over the shock of his words and started to kiss him back. He sat back in his seat and confirmed, “I bought a house and unless you’ve got jetlag, I want to show it to you.”

Brian blinked a few times and nodded. “No jetlag, just shock,” he mumbled. “Give me directions.”

“After exiting the lot, go south on P-W 29.”

“It’s not in Pittsburgh?” Brian asked, his stomach flip-flopping.

“Not exactly,” Justin said mysteriously. “But don’t worry,” he paused and patted Brian’s shoulder, “it’s not that far away from you… oops, I mean Pittsburgh.”

Brian glared menacingly and pulled a strand of Justin’s hair. “I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to act like a twat when I’m about to drive your brand new shiny car through the worst traffic in Pittsburgh.”

TBC in chapter 8 part 2