Chapter 28 - Conjunction.

“Now, where were we?” Brian asked as he rolled on top of his still-naked, still-hard, companion. “Oh, yeah. Right about here, I think.”

Brian marked his place with a long, slow, tongue-filled kiss on Justin's already bee-stung lips. Which was just fine with Justin. He liked the kind of tactile punctuation Brian relied upon. He even gave Brian back some grammar lessons of his own by adding in a descriptive moan here and there. Both of them ended up enjoying the conversation tremendously.

Between the stimulating discussion and the adrenaline still coursing through Brian after the emotional high of his decision to assist the Munchers with their baby plan, the studly brunet was feeling almost giddy. The fact that he was still slightly tipsy didn't help matters much either. The combination was heady. He hadn't felt this reckless and carefree for as long as he could remember. He might be certifiably insane, but for that moment he just didn't care. For once in his life he felt like anything was possible.

Maybe even . . . Brian Kinney letting himself be loved.

The make out session was rapidly devolving into mere panting and rutting when Brian finally paused and looked down at the young man trapped beneath him. Justin smiled up at him with that huge, incandescent smile that seemed to brighten the entire room around them. Brian felt something in the vicinity of his chest give a little breathless flip flop, and for once he decided to just turn his automatic internal defense mechanisms off. What the hell, right? He would just let himself have what he really wanted and trust that, for the first time in his life, things would work out.

With only a tiny wiggle, Brian freed his hot, hard and heavy cock from where it had been trapped between their bodies, allowing it to drop down into the unguarded space below. With every breath, Brian could feel his dick nudging against the tight folds of his companion’s tempting pucker. Each time their skin connected, a tiny jolt of electricity would zap through him. All he would have to do is press forward a few centimeters and it would be done. And he wanted this so badly.

“If you want me to stop, you better speak up now, Sunshine,” he whispered. “If I go any further, I don’t think I’d be able to stop even if I wanted to.”

“I don’t want you to stop,” Justin insisted, sounding just as breathless as Brian. “I want this, Brian. I’ve always wanted this. Wanted you.”

Brian could not only see but hear the sincerity of that statement. He knew what he was about to do was lunacy. He knew he shouldn't. It would complicate something that was already problematic enough. But he wanted it too much to care. So, fine. He was going to do this. He was just, fucking, going to do it and nothing, not even the certainty that he was going crazy, was going to hold him back.

Brian nodded but then started to pull away. “Don’t go, Brian,” Justin pleaded, trying to hold him back.

“I’m not going anywhere,” he corrected Justin’s apparent misconception. “I’m just getting this,” he held up the small packet of lube and the condom he’d fished out of his pants pocket before plopping back down on the bed with a smile.

Justin blushed a deep crimson. Brian thought briefly how adorable the kid was. Then he reminded himself that this ‘kid’ was technically almost twenty years older than himself regardless of his youthful appearance. But it was interesting to note that ghosts could blush. It was also interesting that Justin had reacted in that manner. The shy, blushing smile told him volumes about Justin’s past sexual experience or lack thereof. It seemed the ‘kid’ might still be a bit inexperienced despite his longevity. Brian would have to take that into account, not that it really changed anything or would slow Brian down.

With his treasures in hand, Brian knelt between Justin’s thighs and started to tear open the condom wrapper. He was stopped almost immediately by Justin’s hand closing over his own. Thinking that maybe he’d changed his mind, Brian looked up with chagrin.

“You don’t need that, Brian,” was all Justin said.

“No glove, no love, Sunshine,” Brian reiterated his longstanding rule and tried to shake off the restraining hand.

“Brian, you don’t need it,” the youth insisted. “Even if I didn’t know you’d been tested just three days ago and come back clean, I could tell if you were sick. I’d see it. I always know when you're not feeling well. I can assure you, you're fine.” When Brian still looked as if he was going to object, Justin hurried on. “Besides, even if you were sick, you can’t infect me. I can’t get sick. And I can’t get you sick either. Incorporeal, remember?”

Brian really didn’t want to be reminded of that particular fact but once he did think about it he realized that Justin was right. I mean, if you’re going to fuck your imaginary friend, you really don’t need to worry about condoms, right? That was the one benefit of the imaginary part. Shit, he really must be insane that he was even contemplating this, but since he was, he might as well take advantage of the crazy. Since he'd already decided he WAS going to do this, he’d just have to ignore all the crazy incongruities and take it for what it was worth.

“Good point, Sunshine,” he relented, tossing the unopened condom over his shoulder.

He held up the lube before opening it, wondering if that was superfluous too, but Justin nodded approval of the idea, so he tore open the packet and slathered some of the slippery substance down his straining shaft. His erection had flagged a bit during the condom discussion, but once he was slicked up and took the time to look down at the luscious blond waiting for him, he was raring to go again. Brian pushed the young man’s thighs even wider, shifted forward till he was back in the vee of his crotch and then took a deep breath. Justin continued to look up at him with adoring expectation. Brian realized it was too late to turn back, even if he’d wanted to, which he didn’t. Not at all. So, holding Justin’s gaze with his own, Brian canted his hips backward, bringing his naked cock into position at the untried opening, and determinedly pressed forward.

It was heaven.

That was the only way to describe what Brian felt. Justin was tight and wet and the way he slid into the silky depths was just pure, unadulterated, instantaneous heaven. It was like Justin simply opened up for him. Like they were made for each other. Like they just simply fit. And Brian didn’t even try to hold back the groan of pleasure which percolated up from his soul as his eyes rolled back in his head.

When Brian had bottomed out and couldn’t get any deeper, he opened his eyes once more, only to find an equally blissed out Justin staring back up at him. Brian didn’t see a trace of pain or discomfort despite his suspicions that this was a first for his Sunshine. Instead, the crystal blue eyes were hooded but happy. And the smile he saw was so wide it almost cracked the blond’s face in two. The sense of love and trust emanating from every pore of the young body was palpable. They really did seem perfect for each other.

“Ready for more?” Brian asked, receiving a joyful nod.

Without ever losing any of the awe he felt right from the start, Brian proceeded to fuck the living daylights out of the eager and responsive sprite. Every single thrust was utter bliss. Every time he pulled out, he felt the same thrill of anticipation. Every tingle caused by their skin touching, the friction of his dick sliding in and out of the tightest hole he’d ever experienced, each jolt of pleasure caused by a kiss, a moan, a grunt, caused Brian’s heart to soar. He loved the way Justin rocked along with him, meeting his thrusts with reciprocal parries every single time. He loved the way Justin’s hands seemed to hungrily roam over his back, his nails digging into Brian’s skin on occasion or his fingers tugging on a handful of Brian’s hair whenever he’d get a little out of control. He was aroused by the way Justin had wrapped his strong, stout legs around Brian’s waist, digging his heels into Brian’s ass whenever he wanted to signal for more. It was perfect. Every infinitesimal moment of their joining was sheer, never-heard-of, unparalleled perfection.

Brian didn’t even want to come. If there was some way of staying right in that moment, on the edge of ecstasy, forever, he would have done it. But sooner than he would have liked, he felt the tell-tale roiling in his gut, the fire building up in his balls, and the inescapable urge to increase his pace. Based on the writhing body tangled around his own and the rising volume of Justin’s mewling, Brian determined that his boy must be just as close.

Since there was no fighting it, Brian followed his instincts and let himself go. With one more powerful thrust aimed directly at the target of his lover’s prostate, Brian sank into the welcoming body as hard and deep as he could go. The slap of his balls against Justin’s ass met his ears only a fraction of a second before the sound of Justin’s ‘Oh, Brian!’ And then they were both transported to that nirvana that only a long, draw out orgasm can lead to.

“Fuck, Sunshine. Fuck, fuck, fuck . . .” Brian’s cries mingled with his partner’s as the electrical storm in his gut set both of them ablaze causing a dual explosion.

Brian felt his essence shooting out, deep inside his lover’s body, the warm wetness, uncontained by any latex sheath, drenching his cock. It felt so amazing. And then that heat that had coursed through every nerve in his body was instantly calmed by the wash of cool endorphins, flooding throughout his system and leaving him in a puddle of contentment. When the last spasm of pleasure had finally died away, he collapsed atop the languid body beneath him, his face comfortably nestled in the crook of Justin’s neck and the youth’s arms wrapped securely around him.

“Thank you, Brian,” the hushed words filtered through the languor of his post-coital bliss, adding to the contented peacefulness of the moment. “That was . . . everything . . .”

Brian didn’t say anything himself but, secretly, he agreed.

~**~**~**~**~

The rest of that weekend disappeared in a hazy, sex-filled romp. It seemed like Justin was even more insatiable than Brian himself. After fucking the entire night away at the hotel, they rushed back to Brian’s loft and continued their pursuits there. They only stopped for the occasional nap and food break when Justin insisted that he would disappear on Brian if the man didn't eat something and rest at least a little bit. But, whenever Brian was awake and not eating, they were fucking.

It wasn't until deep in the night early on Monday morning that Brian paused long enough to actually think about what he was doing. He'd been lying with his head resting on Justin's chest after yet another round of explosive sex. His semi-hard dick was still happily buried in his lover’s ass although he could feel the cum dripping out and trickling over his balls as he softened. But thinking about the liters of cum that must be coating them by that point made him suddenly aware of the fact that the pool of Justin's cum which had been puddling between their torsos wasn't there anymore.

Brian pushed himself up on his elbows and looked between them just to be certain. Nope. Not a drop of cum remained. Which was really strange, right? But, then again, if the kid’s clothing could appear and disappear at will, why was Brian surprised that Justin’s cum was subject to the same freaky rules of non-physics?

The disappearing cum really bothered him though. It accentuated and brought to the forefront of his consciousness the dilemma he'd been trying really hard to ignore for the past two nights. He couldn't ignore it anymore though. Because the vanishing cum proved to him once more that the person he'd been fucking - joyfully, repeatedly and with unequalled pleasure - wasn't exactly human. At least not anymore. In fact, he wasn't even really there at all - at least not if you asked anyone other than Brian. So, basically, Brian had been fucking . . . his imagination . . . for the past, fuck-knew-how-many hours.

How could that be? It felt so real. The body lying under him felt solid. The ass he'd repeatedly stuck his dick in felt just like any other ass, only better. But none of that could possibly be real because Justin wasn't real. So what did that make him? Crazy, obviously. But now he wasn't just seeing someone who wasn't there, he was fucking him? That was a whole other level of crazy. What did you call someone that crazy?

The scary word ‘schizophrenic’ popped into his mind.

Brian was now panting and his heart was racing wildly. He couldn't get enough air. He was well into the initial stages of a full blown panic attack.

“Stop, Brian,” the calm, quiet, tenor voice interrupted his hysteria and instantly grounded him. “Stop overthinking things. There's nothing wrong with you, Brian. There's nothing wrong with us. You're not crazy.”

“How did you know . . .”

“I know you, Brian. I've known you all your life. I can read you pretty fucking well by now,” Justin confessed with a snort of laughter. “And you were just about to go into total meltdown mode. But you're wrong, Brian. You're NOT crazy. THIS is real. Weird, but real. So don't start pulling away. Don't deny yourself - don't deny me. Please.”  

Brian stared into the brilliant blue eyes. They were always so fucking expressive. He'd been staring into those beautiful blue eyes his entire life and he thought he could read them almost as well as Justin claimed to be able to read him. Justin’s eyes never hid anything from him. And right now they shone with the purest devotion and caring concern. Those eyes told Brian that he was safe, he was free to be whatever he needed to be, and he was loved. And they were also begging him not to retreat behind his usual defenses and shut out the boy that so obviously loved him.

Closing down WAS really tempting. Every time Brian had opened himself up and let someone in, he'd been hurt. It made perfect sense to protect himself this time too. But for some inexplicable reason, he just couldn't do it. Maybe it was those pleading eyes. Maybe it was because he was so exhausted. Maybe he'd fucked Justin so many times his brains were scrambled. Whatever it was, though, Brian decided that he'd give this thing - whatever the fuck it was and whatever the fuck Justin himself was - a try.

“Fine. Whatever,” Brian sighed and let his head drop back down into its favorite spot on Justin's solid-feeling chest. “But remind me tomorrow morning to check with HR and find out what mental health counseling services are included with my employee insurance benefits. Cause if this thing goes completely to hell and I end up not only fucking my imaginary childhood friend but also hearing his voice telling me to kill and eat my neighbors, I wanna know I'm covered.”

Justin chuckled and tilted his head forward so he could kiss the crown of Brian's head. “That'll never happen stud. You're too OCD to deal with all the blood and gore. Besides, you'd be too busy researching how many additional calories cannibalism would add to your diet and then spending hours on your treadmill to work it all off.”

“True. I hate mess. And carbs,” Brian answered with a jaw popping yawn.

“Sleep, Brian,” Justin directed, sifting his fingers through the baby-fine brunet hair as the Stud snuggled down further on top of his comfy blond mattress. “I'll be here when you wake up. And I promise everything will be alright . . . Somehow.”

~**~**~**~**~**~

Brian's blissed out idyll lasted almost three weeks. He made a conscious decision NOT to think about what was happening between himself and Justin while still revelling in the experience every chance he got. Brian found himself rushing home from work every day, eager to dive into the boy’s ass as soon as he could get his clothing off. He simply could not get enough. And Justin was always there, ready for him, enthusiastic and just as horny. They'd fucked on every available surface in the loft in every imaginable position but Brian still hadn't tired of either the boy or the sex. Justin was better than viagra as far as he was concerned.

In fact, everything was going so great, and they’d fucked so much, that Brian only had one complaint . . . His dick was actually kinda sore.

Of course, as sexually related problems go, that was the kind of problem you wanted to have. Well, sorta. This had rarely been a problem for Brian in the past. No matter how many men he’d fucked during the course of his long, promiscuous sex life, he had only experienced this particular issue on one or two occasions - but those had all been caused by extended play at rather energetic and well attended orgies, and he couldn’t blame his current predicament on that. Hell, except for going to work each day, Brian hadn’t even left the damned loft since his fuck-a-thon with Justin had started.

Now, though, the unthinkable had happened - Justin had officially worn him out

However, when he came through the loft door that evening and was met by a hail of kisses from the ever-lusty ghost boy, Brian didn’t have the heart to tell him ‘no’. Even though the flesh was weak, the spirit was still willing. And Brian’s dick might not be functional at the moment but there were other ways to have fun, right? Not to mention, other urges that might be satisfied in the process.

Without comment, Brian led the ardent apparition up to the bedroom. He pushed the youth down onto the bed and laughed as Justin’s clothing instantly vanished - amused rather than alarmed at this point by his companion’s trick. Brian took his time removing his own clothing, hanging up the suit and depositing his shirt in the dry cleaning bag. He didn’t want to be rushed this evening no matter how impatient his spirited companion might be.

Just as Brian had expected, as soon as he’d lain down on the bed, Justin was all over him. Brian let his lover take over for the moment, enjoying the fierce kisses and wandering hands. You really couldn’t fault the kid for his voracious sexual appetite. And to have all of it focused solely on him, was incredibly flattering. Who cared if the entire situation was crazy - Brian had never in his life had such a satisfying and attentive sex partner.

Which was the only reason he was even contemplating what he was about to do.

When things had heated up to the level where it was time to move on, Brian reached over, grabbed the tube of lube off the nightstand, and then took a deep breath. This wasn’t easy. He still wasn’t sure he could follow through, even though he’d been thinking about it all day. But if he could give this to anyone, it would be Justin - Justin was the ONLY person he could even think about trusting that much.

Justin sensed the hesitation and stopped his kissing in order to look more closely at Brian. They froze in the moment for half a dozen heartbeats, just staring in each other's eyes again. It seemed to be the way they communicated best. Whatever Brian saw seemed to be enough. He nodded to himself, gave Justin an unsure half smile, handed the lube over and then started to shift onto his stomach.

It took Justin a half a second to realize what Brian was doing. When he finally did see the import, he tried to stop Brian, grabbing onto the big man’s shoulder.

“Are you sure, Brian? You haven’t . . . Not since Lars . . .”

Brian didn’t say a word. He merely gave Justin another shy semi-smile and then carried on, settling himself comfortably on his stomach with a pillow shoved down under his hips for support and another bunched up under his chin so he could at least partially hide his expression. Justin bit at his bottom lip, unsure now if he could do what was being asked of him. This was huge for Brian. Justin wanted to give Brian what he was asking for but didn’t want to hurt him in the process, and he wasn’t confident he was up to the job. However, he knew that Brian wouldn’t ever offer this to anyone else, so if this was something Brian needed, it was going to be up to Justin to provide it, regardless of whether he was prepared or not.

Gathering his courage, Justin snapped open the cap on the lube and almost flinched at the audible *snick* it made. Brian continued to just lie there, not looking up or responding in any fashion. But the tension radiating off Brian’s back was a pretty sure sign that he was at least as nervous about this idea as Justin was.

Justin squeezed out a generous amount of lube into the palm of his right hand. Before he could chicken out, he snaked his hand down between the taut cheeks and started to gently prepare Brian’s entrance. Justin would have preferred to take his time a little, add a bit more foreplay, but he knew Brian’s temperament wouldn’t allow for it. Once the Stud had decided on something, it was best to just get on with it or risk pissing him off altogether. So that’s what Justin was going to do now.

One finger, two fingers, three, and then there was nothing more Justin could do. Brian was as ready as he was going to get and Justin would have to be ready too. Not that he wasn’t ready - his dick had never been so hard, not even back when he was still a solid teenage boy - but this WAS his first time topping. And now it was show time.

Placing a kiss on Brian’s shoulder blade, the teenage spirit moved around till he was kneeling as close to brian’s raised posterior as possible. Brian didn’t budge at all. With one hand Justin held his dick in place and with the other he steadied Brian’s hips.

“I love you, Brian,” he whispered and then pressed forward using a steady but gentle motion.

A sharp hiss as Brian raised his head momentarily for a gulp a air was the only sound in the silent loft. The man’s muscles tensed even more than before and Justin immediately froze. He wished he could see Brian’s eyes and know he was really okay. That he wasn’t just doing this out of a misplaced sense of bravado. That he really wanted this.

“Breathe. Just breathe. You’re okay, Brian. I won’t do anything you don’t want me to do.” Justin tried to reassure the tense man with his words but also added a few more kisses to Brian’s back for good measure.

After a moment or two, Justin felt Brian’s hips lift up a fraction of an inch, pushing back against him ever so slightly. He took that as an indication his lover wanted him to proceed. Damn, this would be so much easier if Brian would talk to him. But, since that was unlikely, Justin would have to just press on as best he could and hope he was able to read Brian’s body language as well as he’d always bragged he could.

Advancing at a slow but steady pace, it took only a minute for Justin to sink all the way in till his balls were snugged up against Brian’s ass. He couldn’t believe how amazing it felt. Brian was so fucking tight. And the way the silky walls caressed his dick was indescribable. If he could die again, this is where he’d want to be when he went.

“Move.”

The brusque order startled Justin out of his reverie. He obeyed, pulling out until only the crown of his cock was still inside and then pushing back again. Brian was still lying there rigidly, which wasn’t a good sign. Justin tried it again. Still no appreciable response. Damn it. He wanted to make this good for Brian, but if the man refused to relax, it wouldn’t work at all.

Inching up his knees a bit higher, Justin tried a different angle with his next thrust. Bullseye! That time he’d got an almost inaudible gasping moan and Brian’s head arched up off the pillows. Better. Much better.

Doing his best to hit Brian’s sweet spot on every subsequent thrust, Justin increased his pace, all the time making sure he was touching, stroking, caressing Brian’s back, arms, thighs or hips. And it definitely seemed to be working. Brian didn’t really relax all the way, but at least his ass cheeks weren’t clenched together so tightly anymore. And the unending stream of happy noises that couldn’t be entirely muffled by the pillows told the neophyte boy he wasn’t doing too badly. When Brian started moving in counterpoint to Justin's thrusting, he knew he’d finally got it right.

“Feel you . . . Inside me . . . Want you . . . So good. Fuck. Oh . . . Oh . . . Oh!” The words Brian had been holding back finally broke through.

After that, Brian’s mumblings got louder and more disjointed until, with one last ‘Oh!’ he arched up, his ass convulsing so tightly around Justin’s prick it triggered the new top’s own tumultuous release, and then they both collapsed in a heap.

When Justin could move again - what felt like hours later - he carefully rolled them over without pulling out. He wanted to stay connected as long as physically possible. Brian let himself be pulled backwards, and didn’t fight the encircling arms pulling him into a tight embrace.

“Thank you, Brian. That was incredible. I can’t even begin to tell you how much it means to me . . .”

“Are you going to babble like this every time I let you top, Sunshine?” Brian interrupted.

“Maybe . . . Probably,” Justin answered with an amused tone.

“Just because my dick was sore and I let you take a turn in the driver’s seat doesn’t mean I won’t spank you if you keep acting like a twat, you know,” Brian warned, but his threat was belied by the fact that he simultaneously pulled Justin’s arms even closer.

“Promise?”

“Shut up, Brat.”

“You’re no fun, Brian.”

“I’m lots of fun. Now shut up or you’ll never get to see exactly how fun I am ever again.”

And there wasn’t another word out of Justin the rest of the evening.

Well, not until the next round started, at least.

~**~**~**~**~

The next day was Christmas Eve and everyone, Brian included, had been ordered to Debbie's house for the traditional feast and festivities. It would actually be the first time Brian had seen the rest of the gang since before Winnie & Jon’s wedding. Even so, Brian seemed reluctant to leave the loft in order to go to the celebration.

Justin had a bad feeling about this get together. He'd been rather glad that Brian had been too preoccupied for the past couple of weeks to spend time with Michael and the others. The spirit guide had long been trying to wean Brian away from his old friend and the now-suffocating relationship that they’d become embroiled in. The rampant co-dependency between Brian and the Novotny’s wasn’t good for any of them, if you asked Justin. And Brian really had seemed happier these past couple of weeks without the constant negative reinforcement from his friends. Now that he was being forced back into their company, though, Justin was worried about the inevitable backlash. Would Brian let them manipulate him back into the role of self-destructive party boy and, if so, would Brian pull away from him? Would he try to deny what they’d become?

Not that Brian would be announcing his relationship with Justin, of course. Brian wasn’t even sure that what they had could be called a ‘relationship’ considering that one of the parties didn’t really exist. But he wasn’t about to come out as bat shit crazy in front of his family and friends. He didn’t relish a stay in a psychiatric hospital for New Years. However, there was bound to be at least some reaction to Brian’s recent MIA weeks, if nothing else.

So, it was understandable that Justin was hovering nervously as Brian climbed the steps up to Deb’s front door. Surprisingly, Brian hadn’t told him off like he usually would have. As he was reaching for the door handle, though, Brian looked over at his favorite blond as if for support. Justin gave him back his most encouraging smile and nodded to let Brian know he was there. What he wanted to do was pull the bigger man in for a long, hot, reassuring kiss, but he couldn’t do that here in public, so a smile would have to suffice.

For half a second it looked like Brian was going to turn around and make a run for it, but unfortunately that’s when the door swung open and a piercing, “Briannnnn!” greeted them.

“Finally!” Michael said as he literally towed Brian into the house. “It’s about time you showed up. Ma was just about to send out a search party to find you and drag you over here.”

“Hands off the Armani, Mikey,” Brian ordered as he struggled to pull away from Michael’s grip on his arm.

Michael didn’t release Brian until he’d dragged him all the way into the kitchen where the rest of the crew were already assembled.

“Always fashionably late, of course,” Lindsey teased him as he took the empty seat next to her.

“This isn’t a debutante ball, Asshole,” Debbie chided as she brought over a serving platter filled with honey glazed ham. “You don’t get points for being fashionable. And when I say dinner’s at six, I mean you will be here, with your ass in a chair by or before six. Got it?”

“Got it, Deb,” Brian replied with a shake of his head and a sideways look at Justin who was now shooting Debbie a nasty look.

“So, where the hell have you been lately, Brian?” Michael piped up insistently even as he loaded his plate with green beans and a roll and then passed the dishes on to Emmett. “Nobody’s seen you in, like, forever. I was starting to think you’d died and we just hadn’t found your body yet.”

“Shit, Mikey. I just talked to you on the phone three days ago. Over react much?” Brian served himself one meager slice of the proffered ham and then passed the platter on. “I’ve been busy, is all.”

“Yeah, usually you’re getting busy in the backroom of Babylon, only we haven’t seen you there much lately,” Emmett prodded.

“I’m sure the boys in the backroom are getting along just fine without me.” Brian added a healthy helping of salad to his plate but passed on the rolls.

“The more important question here is, how are you getting along without them, Brian?” Ted interjected. “By my estimates, you’ve been missing for at least twenty days now, which would equate to roughly forty-five tricks you’ve missed out on. I don’t think even you could pick up those numbers at work alone.”

“I’m surprised he hasn’t gone into withdrawal already,” Mel added with her coarse laughter encouraging the others to join in on the hilarity.

“I didn’t realize I was required to clear every fuck I have with you lot,” Brian answered with an affronted frown but then relented a bit when his angry tone seemed to take the jokesters aback. “Thank you for your concern, but I’m just fine and my sex life is as robust as ever, if not more so.” He managed a sly wink in Justin’s direction without anyone noticing and was rewarded with a melodious, unheard giggle from his blond. “Now, I realize my sex life IS fascinating - especially since none of you have one - but can we please move on to another topic already?”

“Darn, just when things were getting steamy,” Vic kidded from his spot on the far side of the table.

Brian looked over at the older man whom he hadn’t seen in awhile and was shocked at how much Vic’s health had deteriorated since his last visit to Pittsburgh. Vic had tested HIV positive a couple of years earlier, but since he didn’t get to Pittsburgh very often, Brian hadn’t realized how far the illness had progressed. Judging by the gaunt look and excessive weight loss Vic was exhibiting, Brian had a very bad feeling that the older man’s condition had progressed to full blown AIDS. He noted the wary glances that Debbie was shooting Vic’s way as well. He made a mental note to talk to her about the situation and offer whatever support he could.

“I’ll fill you in on the juicier details later, Vic,” Brian promised, earning himself a rare smile from Michael's uncle.

“Well, it’s not exactly steamy,” Lindsey spoke up next, drawing the attention away from Vic and Brian, “but Mel and I have some news.”

“I thought we were going to wait a while, Honey,” Mel cautioned with a frown.

“I know, but I’m just too excited to wait, Mel,” Lindsey insisted then turned her attention to the table as a whole. “Mel and I are pregnant! We just got the official confirmation from the doctor yesterday. The baby’s due sometime in September.”

“What?” “Really?” “That’s wonderful, Honey.” “Congratulations.” Everyone spoke up at once offering their best wishes.

“So, who did you guys get to donate? Or did you change your minds and go to a sperm bank instead?” Ted asked as soon as the chatter had died down a bit.

“Of course we didn’t go to a sperm bank. I told you I didn’t want to do that. No, Brian agreed to help us out after all.” Lindsey beamed happily at Brian.

“What? Brian, I thought you said you’d turned them down,” Michael complained, shoving back his chair from the table so he could turn and face his friend directly. “Why the hell would you change your mind all of a sudden? You said you didn’t want anything to do with being a father. You said you didn’t want to mess up your perfect life with that kind of shit.”

“Actually, Michael said all of that, not you, Brian,” Justin spoke up, shooting an evil look at the interfering man who claimed to be Brian’s friend. “He also said you didn’t know anything about being a father and insinuated that all you were good for was fucking your life away. Which is not only insulting but totally wrong, so it’s a good thing you didn't listen to the poser.”

“Well, I’m glad he changed his mind,” Lindsey maintained directing unhappy looks at both Michael and Brian. “Frankly, I don’t agree with you, Brian. I think you’ll be a great father, in your own way. But regardless, Michael, Brian won’t have to change his life at all for this. Mel and I will be raising this child. In fact, we plan to have Brian sign over his parental rights to Melanie as soon as the baby’s born, so Brian won’t have to be any more involved than he wants to be.”

“It’s too late anyway,” Mel reasoned as she helped herself to a second serving of ham. “The deed is done and his bun,” she picked up a roll and tossed it at Brian’s head with a chuckle, “is in the oven. Brian’s going to be a father whether he likes it or not at this point. Knock on wood.”

“Well, I for one am thrilled for you girls,” Debbie exclaimed. “You two are going to make wonderful mothers. And I’m sure Brian will do the best he can. But even if he doesn’t want to step up, you guys will always have all of us to support you. We’re a family and we take care of each other, right guys?” She looked around pointedly at all the other men sitting around her table, as if to enlist them to fill the shoes that she was already sure Brian wouldn’t want to wear.

The response from the gang to Debbie’s assertions was lukewarm at best. Ted nodded awkwardly, Emmett smiled emptily and Michael looked down at his plate without saying anything at all. Brian huffed dismissively at his friends without responding or speaking up for himself.

Justin was fuming and wanted to kick them all in their respective asses for not believing in Brian. Even worse, they made Brian not believe in himself. If they could only hear him, Justin would be screaming at them all for constantly undermining someone they called their friend. But since that would be futile, he vented his anger instead on a water glass that had been left near the edge of the counter, knocking it off and causing it to crash into a million pieces on the floor.

“What the hell?” Everyone jumped and Debbie rushed to get up and clean the resulting mess.

“Sunshine,” Brian admonished under his breath while everyone else was freaking out over the glass that had apparently fallen on it’s own. “Be nice.”

“No. I don’t want to be nice. Tell THEM to be nice. And to stop treating you like they all know better than you what you should do with your life,” Justin yelled, so frustrated and angry that he would have taken out another glass if only Brian wasn’t glaring at him like that. “Please don’t listen to them, Brian. Please don't let them make you doubt yourself just so they can feel superior. I know you’ll be a wonderful father. I know it.”

People were starting to return to the table by that point, so Brian didn’t respond aloud to his personal poltergeist. He just quietly glared at Justin, clearing his throat meaningfully when it looked like the vindictive spirit was going to kick the leg of Michael’s chair just as the man was about to sit. Justin stopped himself but glared right back at Brian.

“I guess that glass must have been sitting too close to the edge of the counter. But no matter. It wasn’t exactly a fucking antique,” Debbie offered as explanation before reseating herself and ordering everyone to have another serving of the ham.

Unfortunately, it didn’t seem like Justin’s distraction had derailed Michael from pursuing the prior conversation. “Well, it’s too bad you changed your mind, Brian. I just don’t think you’ll be happy once you see what a mess a baby is going to make of your life. So much for always saying how you despised fags who were bent on chasing heteronormative fantasies. Before long you’ll be saying bye bye to your free and easy lifestyle too.”

“Now, Michael. We shouldn’t judge,” Emmett tried to intervene and get his roommate to tone down his disapproval. “What we should do, is help make sure Brian gets a chance to live it up while he’s still able. So, I say we all head over to Babylon as soon as dessert is done and make sure our very own stud uses his limited time wisely. Right guys?”

“Let’s see, nine months at an average of about seventy ticks a month that's . . . Six hundred and thirty tricks you need to get through before September,” Ted, the accountant, enumerated. “I think it’s doable, Brian, but you better get started right away,” he teased.

“How about I start by telling all of you to fuck off and then I just go home,” Brian countered, trying not to sound hurt by their less-than-pleasant joking.

“No. No. Em’s right, Brian. You need to enjoy your youth and freedom while you can,” Michael seconded the plan. “Plus, you have to make up for the past couple of weeks you missed as well. Add those lost forty-five to your total, Ted.” Everyone laughed along at the supposed joke. “So, it’s settled, we’re all going to Babylon tonight.”

“Oh, fuck me!” Justin growled at the back of Michael’s head and proceeded to kick his chair after all.

Michael looked around when his chair shook slightly under him, but when he didn’t see anything behind him, he forgot about it. He reapplied himself to his food and the conversation turned to topics other than criticism of Brian’s life. Brian, as usual, didn’t say much. It seemed to be a foregone conclusion that he would do as he was directed and follow the pack to Babylon for the night. Whenever he was confronted by the group he always seemed to buy into their projections of him and there really didn’t seem to be much Justin could do about it.

~**~**~~**~**~**~**~